Coon's Cooler

Things got weird last night.

The cooler took a spin on the inversion table and shared this nugget of health wisdom: "Never under any circumstances take a sleeping pill and a laxative on the same night."

Due to his model being originally date to the 1970's, the cooler CEO still follows a behavior pattern reminiscent of that decade. This undercover photo captures him inappropriately contacting a younger cooling device.

Here the dark overlord of chilled beverages and portable food items inflicts a physical rebuke upon his new executive assistant.

You just can't reason with acrylonitrile butadiene styrene.

It's strange hearing, "You need to wash your hands before you eat that," from someone who hasn't showered in two years.

The cooler has deposed our CEO and is now ruling with an iron handle.