not to be insensitive but some of the salem witch trials were so funny bitches like “i saw her at the devils sacrament!!!” girl... what were YOU doing at the devils sacrament 👀
happy birthday devils sacrament. i wish you were never born
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not to be insensitive but some of the salem witch trials were so funny bitches like “i saw her at the devils sacrament!!!” girl... what were YOU doing at the devils sacrament 👀
happy birthday devils sacrament. i wish you were never born

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fanservice sucks bc it’s never you that’s being serviced it’s always some other really annoying fan
honestly i never thought the phrase “i want that twink obliterated” was like a sexual thing. like when i read the phrase i imagine “a meteor like the one that killed the dinosaurs is summoned from the heavens and hits the twink in question” type situation
I always pictured something like this
We’ve waited a year to reblog this. Happy Bread Anniversary!
Because it’s important to celebrate the little victories in life.
12 days left until the breadiversary, we’d better make sure we have the ingredients on hand!
It’s today!
It’s today!!
stop using hospitals as horror settings
fun alternative: cruise ships. cruise ships exploit workers and can pollute as much as a million cars on a daily basis while dumping endless shit into the ocean and endangering all passengers on board because the on board air quality rivals some of the most polluted cities in the world while being a breeding ground for disease. cruise ships deserve to have negativity associated with them
also all crimes commited aboard a cruise ship is under the juristiction of whichever country they’re registered to once they’re a certain distance away from land so you have the added bonus of the crimes being very unlikely to be properly investigated (due to usually being physically so very far from the actual police whose juristiction they’re under)
terrifying!
On top of THAT cruise ships tend to have their own morgue, as people tend to die on ships all the time. Good for those spooky scenes.
plus u can just like…leave a hospital. good luck escaping a killer or a monster or a curse or w/e in the middle of the fucking ocean
As an ex cruise ship employee, let me give you some stuff to work with!
Water tight doors! You get a special training video on interacting with these correctly because they will literally cut you in half if you try and go through them while they’re closing!
Freezer vaults for food in the sub decks - you can only get into these with the correct code and they have very thick walls. Good luck if you get shut in one of these just after the last round of checks bucko
There are cameras everywhere…except in the crew cabin corridors. Also there are no windows down there because unless you’re an officer, you live below the waterline. Day and night have no meaning because everything is in the same slightly unsettling yellow light.
Don’t piss off the guys who deal with the rubbish. They have machines down there that can crush metal barrels
As well as morgues, cruise ships usually have one basic operating theatre with all the attendant horrifying equipment in it
One cigarette thrown carelessly in the wrong place WILL start a fire that will gut half the ship.
When we’re pitching side to side, the anchor swings out and then back in, striking the metal outer shell with a noise that shakes half the ship
People disappear overboard more often than you’d really want to be a thing
A lot of cruise ships now have theatres on board (usually towards the front) with all the potential for dark corners, creepy costumes and electrical calamities you could want.
And as op says, you can’t really escape a ship in the middle of the ocean. Particularly during a storm, as then you can’t even evacuate to lifeboats unless the whole ship is going down. On the upside being on board during a storm means most guests hide in their cabins and the staff walk around like drunks, which would likely throw off a skilled murderer’s plans.
Takes notes
You also have the bonus of a corporate overlord who doesn’t give a shit about anything but profits and can be reliably counted on to downplay any disaster in an attempt to avoid publicity.

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Put a / in the year you were born, so we will have an average age
Before 1990: //////
1990:////
1991://////
1992:////////////
1993://///////////////
1994:////////////////////
1995: //////////////////////////////////////
1996: /////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////
1997: /////////////////////////////////////////////////////////////
1998: ////////////////////////////////////////////////////////
1999: ///////////////////
2000: //
After 2000: /
This is what we did before polls, when we could still edit posts
stone age tumblr utilizing primitive tools
I made a bad comic and now you have to look at it
how does it feel to be the funniest person on earth
EVERY YEAR

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Tumblr isn't giving us back the boops for ides of march so I will do it myself.
Get your boops everyone!!!
I just put these together real quick feel free to use them.

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audio On 😂😂😂
Peer-reviewed tags
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Y—o—u—P—e—o—p—l—e—W—i—l—l—R—e—b—l—o—g—A—n—y—t—h—i—n—g
needs an em-dash at the beginning and/or end, otherwise the first or last letters will be right next to each other
϶—O—h—T—r—u—e—ϵ
(added clasps)
϶—F—r—i—e—n—d—s—h—i—p—B—r—a—c—e—l—e—t—ϵ
϶—C—U—R—S—E—D—A—M—U—L—E—T—ϵ
Cursed amulet necklace that doesnt have a cursed amulet its just the phrase cursed amulet
϶—C—U—R—S—E—D—(¤)—A—M—U—L—E—T—ϵ
϶—T÷h÷a÷t÷s÷A÷G÷o÷o—d—P o
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⠀⠀⠀⠀M⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀Y
⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀B⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀EA
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Use a beading board to keep your beads securely in place while working so this doesn't happen