Conflict Management

Experts have already considered that your listening skills have become important factors that are essential to leadership that is responsive, attentive and empathetic.

 These days, however, people tend to give a great deal of attention to anyone’s ability to speak. This had been cultivated as a highly desirable, sought-after skill from Toastmasters to an unlimited amount of courses, workshops, and training on public speaking.

 Public speaking and the listening ability

 It had been promoted that the public speaking ability is an essential component to those who want to advance their careers in business and in politics.

 In all of these, however, the ability to listen is every bit as important as speaking. Experts have classified that your listening skills is even more important than the skill in public speaking.

 Human nature dictates that everyone wants to be heard and understood.  Society had shown that we tend to reward people who give us the opportunities with our trust and loyalty.

 Here are some ways you can improve your listening skills.

 Be in the moment

 You may find it extremely annoying when you are speaking to someone and find they are distracted by something and not listening to you.

 It is very important to be fully present that you listen when someone is speaking. The proper way is letting them know you have a call to make, take a call or text an answer. One respectful way is to also inform them when you are finished and are ready to listen.  

 When listening, pay attention to the words, the tone of their voice, the facial expressions, and the body language. This will be your source of relevant information and are important as the words themselves.

 Speaker’s place

 Sometimes, what a speaker speaks about does not coincide what you believe. However, what they are saying are important to them.

 When they are speaking, make an effort to think of where they come from and why. Imagine what their life is like and what struggles they might be facing.

 People always appreciate that you made the effort to understand and really hear them.

 Pick up key points

 Most people have some trouble focusing on what is someone saying. It is easy for attentions to drift away to something more interesting. This is where one needs to pick up some key points in the conversation.

 After they finish, let them know you heard them clear enough by letting them know the key points that you heard. You are usually forgiven for not being able to follow the whole conversation, but the person knows you made an honest action of listening.

 Active listening

 It is natural that people think what to reply and how to go about it when a person is talking.

Again, try to focus completely on what the person is saying.

 You will notice that it gets much easier to focus on their words. Worrying about how they will respond when you seem not to worry about how you will respond is not important.

The act of listening different from hearing and communication is now more important than ever especially in today's high-speed, high-tech and high-stress world, yet there are still people who seem to commit less time to actually listening to each other. The principles of effective communication in general can only be done with a set of good listening skills and an understanding. A genuine listening skill has become an infrequent gift as it helps ensure understanding, build relationships, improve accuracy, resolve conflicts and solve problems. Especially in a workplace, effective listening means less wasted time because it helps avoid errors, builds friendships and careers. Listening is so essential that is why many of top employers provide training on how to improve listening skills for their employees. When you consider a good listening skills training for every employees, this is not surprising that it can lead to greater productivity with fewer mistakes; you can ensure a better customer satisfaction as well as it can lead to more innovative and creative work.

 A good listening skill is the ability to precisely receive and understand the idea in the communication process which is the vital aspect to all effective communication. If one's don't have the ability to listen effectively, it will lead to misunderstanding and as a result, the sender of the message can surely become irritated or frustrated as the communication breaks down. That is why everyone must know how to improve listening skills and it is one communication skill that you should aim to master. The listening skill can be practiced, learned and improved like other communication skills. One can begin to develop and maximize his or her listening skills effectively by paying attention to their own communication behaviors. There is no doubt that learning how to improve listening skills is also extremely important part of our life because it serves a number of possible purposes. The goal of an effective listening will depend on the nature of the communication and the situation. A good listening skill means avoiding distractions and preconceptions and accurately focuses on the message that is being communicated.

Self-empowerment explains taking charge of life and loving one's self. It provides acceptance of strengths and weaknesses and achieves inner peace. Seeing the significance of empowerment means that such duties must be carried out with independence or force. Self-empowerment is also about knowing yourself in a related way. It means your inner self, your strength, and your life's administration. And for this, you have to have faith and confidence.

 Being a self-empowered individual is a way for positive and meaningful change in life. It leads the path to the right decisions and improves self-confidence. It also helps bring healthy well-being and develop the best version of yourself. Self-empowerment requires cultivation skills that eventually will enable you to affect those results and to deliver meaningful results. It is not just self-empowering emotion. People will feel encouraged to hear a moving voice, but as recent evidence rightly demonstrates, people may not receive authority until they improve their life measurably.

 Progress relationships. You will face problems without anyone's assistance with self-empowerment. It provides a sense of responsibility and determination to address all of the issues. Furthermore, you will not need to request validation from others since it will trigger bitter relationships to ask friends and family for claims once you begin to embrace yourself, though, as you do. You will then become an inspiration to others. You don't need anybody, because you're going to remember, to tell you how capable you were.

 Improve health. People with poor confidence have great difficulties dealing with life. In addition, it leads to a host of health problems; one of them is anxiety. But you will have the chance to stand up for yourself with self-empowerment. You, your preferences and dislikes until your perceptions are clear. Then the people around you wouldn't need to worry for you. The responsibility of accommodating others wouldn't have you to bear. You will discover a safe being with simple thoughts in mind.

 Build a successful career. People are susceptible to making mistakes in different professions. Some mistakes can cost the job, but with self-empowerment, you will have the confidence and positive thinking towards making good decisions for your work. Besides, any decisions and actions you make will not leave you behind. Fast decisions help you notice by the bosses, which might be a stepping stone towards your promotion and success.

 Conquer challenges. People avoid taking the spring of confidence since they care so much about the effects. Yet autonomy helps tear down the walls to think out. It helps to achieve new objectives and to overcome older ones. You are still encouraged to do more self-empowerment than average. Avoid underestimating yourself for the betterment of your personality. Do not depend on people around, but better attempt to overcome your vulnerabilities at your level. Start to explore new talents and possibilities.

Throughout the ages, there had been no shortage of advice or opinions on how children should be raised. There had been a barrage of opinions, throughout the decades on the best ways of parenting skills. 

Others had been advocates of properly implementing firm guidance principles for children, including some physical lessons. However, the winds of opinions keep changing back and forth when parenting skills are advised for a gentler, easy-going style. 

All these bring out the confusion as to the right way to rear children. 

Differences 

All these time, people have forgotten that every family, every child, every situation, and even the eras are all different. Sometimes, by changing how we frame the role of parenting skills can help in offering some clarification. 

In a simile, you can frame your family and your home as a company. You and your partner are the CEOs of this company. The focus will then become that of being an effective leader, neither a pushover nor a dictator. 

Within that group, you can take any role that fits you, or depending on the current circumstance. You can be a friend, a mentor, a coach or a law enforcement officer. All the while, you many never forget that you are the leader that can provide guidance, training and encouragement. 

In this situational leadership scenario, you and the children will take on roles and you will adopt the characteristics of an effective leader. 

Trust 

It is more likely that children are willing to follow and listen to someone they respect and trust. This trust can be built by setting reasonable limits to follow through. In real time, there are plenty of opportunities for everyone to actively engage in listening and communicating. 

They have rules that provide safety and encouraging independence and taking risks. These rules are tailor-fitted to suit the child’s age, maturity, and level of development. These rules

and expectations for a child may not exactly mirror those that are created for others. 

Training 

Everyone knows how frustrating is it to work with someone who expects results without supplying clear directions and guidance. Children are innately provided with the desire to please their parents but they lack the experience and the developmental maturity. 

As leaders, we can help them gain the skills they need to be successful in later life. This type of training, however, is done by increments, small steps over time. Also, mistakes must be understood as part of the training process and as opportunities for growth. 

Accountability 

Like the adults, children gain confidence through setting and achieving goals. Parent-leaders should help children by identifying and building on their strengths in growth areas through patience and encouragement. 

The effective parents who are practicing as the leaders should never have to expect everyone to achieve the same goals at the same time. The correct option is to customize their approaches to each individual. 

Teamwork 

Universally, the most satisfying work experiences are those where everyone feels valued and everyone contributes. Effective parent leaders take time to build strong parent-child relationships.  

Do you feel blessed with lots of opportunities? Or do you feel like you're running out of choices, or opportunities in life? If you feel like there's not enough left anymore, then I'm afraid you're already showing signs of the dreaded “scarcity” mindset! Read on to find out the major tell-tale signs of the scarcity mentality.

You Struggle to Achieve Long-Term Objectives

If you regularly feel that you don't have enough time to get everything done, or you feel that you're no longer good enough for that job or business venture (or whatever it is you

are doing) then I'm afraid, I'm very afraid that you already have a scarcity mentality! 

If your mindset is constantly focused on what you don't have instead of what you do, then you're not alone because a lot of folks are feeling this way too, even if humans today are better off than at any time in history! 

You've Mastered the Art of Waiting for the Other Shoe to Drop

Even if things are already going well for you, but you still keep on saying that the bad news is just around the corner, then you definitely have a scarcity mentality! And even if your closets are already bursting to the seams (and your place is cluttered) but you still find it tough to get rid of things because you never know when you may need them, then that's a sign or symptom of a scarcity mindset! 

You Love Hearing Others Fail

If you suddenly feel an affinity for listening to sleazy tabloid stories of celebrities and business tycoons who fall prey to sex scandals or wrecked marriages, then I am sorry to say that you are now manifesting the signs and symptoms of a scarcity mindset! 

You'd Rather Choose to Save Instead of Spend Money

While saving for the rainy days is indeed a good thing to do, those who espouse a scarcity mentality do so because they have this great fear that financial ruin or destitution is just around the corner. While your friends and family may call you frugal, I would choose to call you paranoid! 

You're Green with Envy Overt he Success of Others

If you over time get green with envy over the achievement or success of your co-workers or friends, and you keep trash-talking their expensive holidays or shopping purchases, then I'm sad to say that you've already been devoured by the scarcity mindset! 

With a  scarcity mentality a person's actions and thoughts often emanate from a place of fear, as it orients or poison's the individual's mind towards his or her unfulfilled goals and needs, instead of focusing on the things that they currently have, or wish to have. 

A large number made of money are lost every day in organizations simply because of poor listening in the company that may be only thousands or maybe just less and whatever the amount is it would be amazed at how much money is lost due to poor listening skills. The problem is that everyone wants to be heard first to think about it because when people are striving to be heard and understood first. It's pretty hard for listening to occur and poor listening leads to assumptions and misunderstandings that lead to errors, ineffective decisions, and cost of mistakes. In regarding to someone's explanation the not attending attentions leads to hurt feelings and a loss of team cohesion that deteriorates trust and weakens communication even further. By connecting the dots, it can see that poor listening leads to lower profits by the definition of listening because the hearing is one thing and listening is another that should look at some definitions. The listening act has become aware a sound by ear that truly trying to understand another person's point of view and hearing happens passively if the ears are functioning as designed which that can hear. 

You don't have to think of it something happens that causes a noise and if close enough you can hear it but on the other hand, listening requires an active conscious choice to listen, it must have a purpose in heart and apply mental effort for listening skills. The possibility might even think of listening as a task that requires focused attention to get accomplished and by getting past the obstacles the fear is the largest obstacle that inhibits listening whenever disagreements exist. People are afraid that if they set their own perspective aside for a moment and truly strive to understand another person's point of view to several things may happen. This will be perceived as agreement even if no agreement exists to learn that something that shows their own perspective was incomplete they won't get a chance for their own point of view to be heard. The hindrance exists for why it doesn't truly listen but if going to get past them it must acknowledge one very important fact and truly understanding to someone else's point of view does not come naturally and it's a listening skills that always requires effort. 

Stress takes a heavy toll on mental and emotional health, so it is essential to keep it in check. While you cannot avoid all stressors, stress management strategies can help you bring things back into balance and acquire good mental health.

Here are some ways to manage your stress levels:

Appeal to your senses. Everyone responds to sensory input a bit differently, so begin experimenting now to find what works best for you. For example, listen to an uplifting song to make you feel calm. Smell ground coffee or a favorite scent. Squeeze a stress ball works quickly to make you feel centered. When you discover how your nervous system responds to sensory input, you can calm yourself quickly and maintain good mental health no matter when or where stress hits.

Talk to a happy and friendly face. Face-to-face social interaction with people who cares about you is the most effective way to relieve stress and calm your nervous system. Interact with another person can put the brakes on damaging stress responses such as fight or flight. It also releases stress-busting hormones, so you will feel better even if you are unable to alter the stressful circumstance.

Pay attention to leisure time. Engage in your favorite activities to make you feel good. Go to a funny movie, listen to music, take a walk on the beach, read a good book, or talk to a friend. Do these things because they are fun and can give you satisfaction. Play is essential in good mental health.

Take up a relaxation practice. While sensory input can relieve stress at the moment, relaxation methods can help reduce your overall levels of stress although they are likely to take more time to learn effectively. Yoga, deep breathing, mindfulness meditation, or progressive muscle relaxation can put the brakes on stress, and bring your body and mind back into a state of balance.

Make time for appreciation and contemplation. Think about the things you are grateful for. Mediate, enjoy the sunset, pray, or take a moment to pay attention to what is positive and beautiful as you go about your day.

Do not skimp on sleep. If you lead a busy life, cutting back on sleep may seem like a smart move. But when it comes to your good mental health, getting enough sleep is a necessity, not a luxury. Skipping even a few hours here and there can take a toll on your mood, mental sharpness, energy, and ability to handle stress. Over the long-term, chronic sleep loss can wreak havoc on your outlook and health.

While you should aim for seven to nine hours of quality sleep each night, it can be unrealistic to expect sleep to come the moment you lay down and close your eyes. At the end of the day, your brain needs time to unwind. This means taking a break from the TV, phone, tablet, computer a few hours before bedtime. This includes putting aside work, and postponing worrying, arguments, or brainstorming until the next day.

At a company, employee conflicts can happen amidst life-or-death situations, for example, in a hospital. When you ignore these conflicts, nobody benefits from it. While it is natural for humans to avoid uncomfortable conflict with others, this tactic will not work in the long term. By the time a confrontation comes to the attention of HR, it is often too late like when a valuable staff is quitting. With this, you need to learn how to resolve conflict because even those seemingly small conflicts can be about larger issues.

Beneath the Surface

Workplace conflicts occur everywhere, and ignoring them can be costly. Every unaddressed conflict wastes about long hours of work time in gossip and unproductive activities. Understanding the reasons behind workplace conflicts can help HR tackle problems before a conflict turns into a face-off between people in a screaming match that refuse to work together.

A good place to begin on how to resolve conflict is by realizing that, even though people may avoid it, conflict can be normal and healthy. In fact, it is a vital ingredient to the success of a company. Experts said that the most effective teams are those, in which members feel safe enough to disagree with each other. A culture where you allow or encourage disagreement can spur diversity of thought, innovation, and better decision-making.

The challenge is to figure out which conflicts are healthy and which ones are dangerous. Unhealthy conflict is when it becomes emotional and personal, clouding your judgment. On the other hand, good conflict can lead to higher levels of confidence and trust. For example, if people see that it is all right to question or disagree with the boss, they can question the status quo, which is better for the organization.

The heart of a conflict is difference, so when finding ways on how to resolve conflict, it is essential to explore areas where individuals do not align. Another reason for a clash is conflicting priorities. Some people fight over resources like budgets, while others fight because of incompatible goals regarding the company.

When Should HR Intervene?

Conflict management experts advise that HR should introduce ways how to resolve conflict and get involved in workplace conflicts when:

Disagreements are getting personal, and respect among people is lost.

Conflicts impact morale and organizational success.

Employees are threatening to quit because of the problem.

When to Seek Outside Help?

While you can address workplace conflicts at a local level, sometimes you need outside help from conflict management professional. These situations include the following:

When there are patterns of recurring problems.

When the flare-ups resemble bullying or are becoming abusive.

When the HR department does not have the time to provide the necessary conflict resolution.

When the environment has become so toxic it is time to get everyone offsite so the office does not trigger continuing negative responses.

When it involves potential legal issues, for example, allegations of harassment or discrimination.

Parenting skills training is an effective tool for improving the sense of competency and self-efficacy of parents. It’s also after achieving parental satisfaction. The good thing about it is that it results in more positive changes in the attitudes of most parents. This is true to say considering self-mastery and self-esteem regarding parenting.

In addition to that, it helps increase positive parenting practices. The use of planned discipline, positive language, & family routines is also as implemented. It encourages more of nurturing the behavior of the children. It increases further the knowledge of parents to child communication and development styles.

Parenting skills training results in more established social connections of parents. And these connections can then be utilized in exchanging parenting advice, providing emotional support, and sharing resources. This thereby leads to more positive parenting and more positive feelings.

Parents who will participate well in parenting skills training increase their children’s pro-social behaviors. These behavior types can include sharing, helping others, empathy, and a decrease in negative behaviors. As per these negative behaviors, these can include delinquency, aggression, & hyperactivity.

Parenting skills training also improves the communication skills of both the children and parents. This results in a better understanding among family members. Even parental well-being and mental health are as well improved in this regard. They may experience improvements short-term in their mental health. That also includes a decrease in anxiety, depression, guilt, stress, and anger.

The great result brought about by parenting skills training is the decrease in the use of corporal punishment. Even the risks of child abuse are as well avoided. A parenting skills program can help parents in learning more alternatives to changing their family mindset and physical punishment. This is true regarding the expectations of the children, other essential values, and family roles.

Below are so far more of the practices or strategies used in parenting skills training. These have likewise been associated with positive results among families.

Set Some Cultural Adaptations. Effective parenting skills training accommodate the cultural traditions and unique needs of the families being served.

Engage Parents Effectively. Successful parenting skills training provides more opportunities for parents. This way, they will practice more skills they will be learning. This can either be in the form of at home, professional, group, or on-site with the child.

Provide Frequent Sessions Throughout the Months. The training can run for several months. It can as well bring out the best outcomes.

Use Skilled Educators. Parents can benefit more from the training programs using the parent educational facilitators.

Promote Family Routines. Effective parenting skills training emphasize the importance of regular family routines, family roles, & family activities.

Reach the Parents Early On. The parenting skills training program is aimed at better- serving parents of young children or new parents. Thus, their challenges will be addressed early on. This puts the stage for more positive and better experiences in life.

Parenting is indeed one of the toughest jobs to ever hold. It does not come with a handbook or a clear-cut description. The good thing is that parenting skills class is designed in making the job easier. It also provides you with the needed knowledge, information, and skills to understand your children. You’ll also dig deeper into their developmental needs. Plus, you will learn more about parenting strategies suitable for your children. That also includes their personalities and sense of temperament.

Set your children up for success. It’s pretty much helpful to attend a workshop or take a parenting class. Below are more of the reasons to convince you of taking parenting skills class.

Staying Updated of the Latest Research

It can indeed be difficult staying updated with the latest research. But, it’s more essential to learn what needs to be done with gearing your children up toward success. For one, researchers found that parents accidentally cause harm to children when they praise them. While parents tell their children of being smart upon doing something impressive, still research proved that this is counterproductive.

If you tell your kids they will succeed because they are smart, they will then become discouraged. This is true if they could not solve a problem. It’s rather suggested by experts to focus on giving them praise for their hard work. Target the parts of the projects wherein your child excelled at solving the problem.  

Attending parenting skills class helps you to stay abreast of new sets of discoveries. You will learn more about the best parenting practices from experts. You just have to ask more questions. You will then apply the advice more the next day.

Mastering the Basics

Almost all parents are frightened about welcoming their first child. It can be really challenging feeding and caring for an infant. Even preparing your child for a school is another.

Parenting skills class is particularly helpful for you as a parent. You will learn more about the things to expect in the coming years. You will also be prepared for every developmental stage. You can become confident and secure with the much-needed skillset provided. You also then decrease your anxiety feelings. It’s worth your time mastering the basics.

Discovering Matching your Parenting Style to Your Child’s Personality

An essential part of parenting is about matching praise, discipline, and parenting strategies to your child’s specific needs. Your parenting style should match the personality of your child. This can bring a major impact on how a child can be well-adjusted later on in life.

Parenting skills class is geared toward helping you meet your children’s needs. It can also help you combine the personality and parenting style that suits your child.

Gaining Confidence

When you become a parent, you need to muster up your courage and go for it. Confidence is essential to good parenting. Your child should believe in you knowing what you’re doing.

Now the parenting skills class will come in giving you confidence in your actions. This way, you will also shower confidence to your child. Meet other parents and discover more strategies when needing help.

As your needs and wants in life continues, so is your need to improve yourself. And as you aspire further in life, the more you need to aim for personal development. How then is self-improvement different from personal development?

Self-improvement refers to self-help endeavors to improve oneself. It refers to your efforts to become better like- eating healthy meals and exercising regularly to improve your health and physique; practicing how to groom and dress-up to appear more pleasing; cooking more often to improve your cooking skills; singing karaoke to improve your singing skills; watching video tutorials to learn how to dance; reading books to improve your vocabulary; and the like. Anything you do by yourself to improve is called self-improvement.

Personal development is not limited to self-help activities aimed at achieving short-term goals. It refers to a far broader scope and degree of improving awareness and identity, developing talents and potential, building human capital, and facilitating employability all geared towards continuous enhancement of quality of life and realization of dreams and aspirations. It involves structured activities, formal and informal, like classes, courses, seminars, training, workshops, and institutes. It develops roles and professions like becoming a- sports coach, chef, theatre performer, ballerina, a teacher, couture, a teacher, and the like.

Personal development is a life-long process of spiritual, mental, and physical development. It involves learning new knowledge and skills, honing of talents and potentials, and improvement on limitations and weaknesses. It includes programs and activities that improve awareness and identity, strategies and frameworks for personal growth, goal setting, and self-improvement, financial management, and more.

Personal development courses offer a wide line of courses that help individuals explore and hone their fullest potentials towards achieving a productive and happy life regardless of their occupation or circumstance. Its courses include topics on- personal growth, maturity, relationships, parenting, leadership, conflict resolution, power of deep learning, success, and happiness.

Personal development courses adopts interactive modes of personal development giving learners options to choose which medium and location of learning best fits their circumstance.

The learning programs of personal development courses come in book, video, or audio form of instructions giving its learners the option to choose the most conducive and safe learning environment they want. Its instructions offer- powerful and time-tested strategies; real-life stories and examples; active participation and exercises rather than mere lecture; tools and skills that participants can take with them wherever they go in life; and knowledge of how people tick and how to help them change.

The power to choose is an innate capacity of every human being to choose among alternatives or to act in certain situations on their own volition without pressure or restraint of any sort.

Everyone has the power to choose even at an early age. Babies cry if they do not get the feeding they want. Even at days old, they know if they are given milk or water; they cry vehemently if not given what they want. Kids do choose which toys to play with, what TV show to watch, or which clothes to wear.

Allowing kids their power to choose has the following significant benefits:

•  Develops critical thinking, creativity, sense of worth, and self-confidence. Allowing kids to choose what they want develops their critical thinking and creativity. They feel they are valued when their choices are respected thereby developing their sense of worth. Kids feel proud of themselves if they are able to make their own choices. Being appreciated for their choices makes them feel confident.

Developing kids’ critical thinking and creativity enables them to make sound choices in adult life and find creative ways to pursue their goals. Developing their self-worth and self-confidence make them empowered individuals who know what they deserve and what they are capable of achieving.

•  Teach control and freedom. Taking control is a natural human desire even among kids. Allowing them to choose what they want helps them learn how to take control of situations and letting them feel some extent of freedom at an early age.

Learning to take control of situations at an early age develops them into self-empowered individuals determined at pursuing their goals regardless of the challenges. Experiencing freedom to choose at early an age makes them assertive of their rights and likely to become advocates against oppression and other forms of repression.

•   Teach sense of responsibility and the value of positive choices. Allowing kids to choose what they want is also giving them the opportunity to experience the consequences of their choices. When they experience the hard consequences of their negative choices, they learn feeling responsible for their choices and the value of making positive choices.

Learning to be responsible for their choices at early age makes them responsible adults able to make amends and ready to make rectification for their offences. Learning the value of positive choices at an early age makes them grounded adults able to discern and make informed decisions.

•   Develops problem solving skills. When kids experience the hard consequences of their negative choices, they learn to learn to fix or rectify and to carefully discern before making choices the next time.

Learning decision making and problem solving skills at an early age prepares them for far more difficult adult concerns and problems. They are likely able to succeed in their chosen fields of endeavor and turn-out natural leaders.

Beyond emotional intelligence has been importance in the modern world, especially in the domain of leadership from psychologists, management academics, and business leaders continue to perpetuate interest. The subject despite the fact that the concept it is far from new and one of the earliest references to emotional intelligence was collection of works on the emotional meaning of communication. Helping to move the concept forward while it is often credited with bringing the concept of emotional intelligence to the fore through why it can matter more than subtests designed to assess human intelligence. It identifies both self and social awareness as two of the main components of emotional intelligence. It is not surprising that developing a high quotient of emotional intelligence is seen as central to leadership effectiveness. After all, if you don’t understand yourself as a leader, how can you lead and understand others, right? Take a simplistic look at where the concept of emotionally mature comes from, it was initially thought that emotions had a negative effect on thought and, as such, was a detrimental quality to have.

However, the understanding of emotional intelligence developed so did the perspective conceiving that emotions and thought can be adaptive and complement each other. Indeed, that emotional intelligence is fundamental to life success and a number of theories on emotional intelligence have subsequently emerged. As a leadership development, behind the importance of emotional intelligence on both in business and in life despite the work on emotional intelligence and its inclusion in emotionally mature. Many still struggle with managing the emotions or even show no emotion at all because an experience of once who had no sense of self-awareness and lacked the ability to demonstrate the principles of emotional intelligence yet had gone through the any skills and knowledge or fitness that relate to specific useful competencies. The answer may be found in the fact that many leaders might be emotionally intelligent, but not emotionally mature. There remains a disconnect between the ability to learn the concepts of emotional intelligence and intellectualize about them and being able to manage one’s emotions or emotional reactions. A truly developed the ability to manage our emotions, first have to understand our emotional triggers, which are often formed over time from our childhood.

One of the vital essential of listening skills when it comes to managing ourselves and others through change is the art of asking good questions. The invitation is to be curious about how your speed and tone might or might not be impacting someone else’s ability to respond. To work and live with others we have to be able to ask good questions and give someone else space to respond. This become frustrated when questions are left unanswered, not answered quickly enough or take our thinking somewhere are not comfortable to share. Knowing the brain can take things quite literally and make some weird and wonderful connections between what is heard and existing map of the world. The pace of a question can generate urgency in me that means that forget to think and process before responding. And yet when giving yourself a time to think have been accused of being dishonest and not speaking the truth. Take a moment to listen in the stories you have about to questions and how should or should not be answered.

Perhaps you think people that hesitate are not telling the truth, or that when you can’t answer quickly people will think you are stupid. The list goes on and not have heard many of the unravel stories the critic tells them about how questions should be asked and or answered. All those stories inhibit the ability to listening skills. If you are keen to be the best manager, leader and or parent you can be and you want to develop your skills to motivate, manage or mentor others. Don’t miss out the annual retreat where explore to listen, questioning and feedback on listening skills and unravel what is holding you back from getting or giving the response you want. It has always been keen to create space where other people felt safe to speak their truth no matter what that was. It is well known that the ability to motivate manage and mentor others through change and loves nothing more than turning overwhelm into a clarity and confidence that change can and is happening.

Personal power is an inherent toughness from within. It entails breaking free from feeling mentally and emotionally powerless. It is that conscious resolve to rise from and against everything that holds you back from doing positive action. It is the ability to control and master oneself. It is anchored on your vision and disposition as to what is right, true, ideal, and beneficial.

You know it when you are letting go of your power over yourself. When you procrastinate you submit to that feeling of unwillingness to do what you need to do and end-up doing things of lesser importance. When you succumb to envy or jealousy you tend to instigate conflict. When you submit to doubt and fear you end-up evading or denying. When you yield to selfishness you care less of others and become self-centred.

The ability to influence people and change circumstances with courage and competence is power. If the power stems from one’s principles, fortitude and will power, that is personal power. But if it stems from just being in a position or designation in an organization or hierarchy, it is called positional power. Personal power is generated from within the person while positional power is vested or accorded. These two types of power are not exclusive from each other though. Many leaders designated to a position are influential not because of the position they hold but primarily because of their personal power. You can be an elected leader but if you fail to harness that power within you your position remain lame and your actions may consequently fail.

True power is inherent in you and you have to own it. Owning your power makes you credible and effective. It increases your confidence and understanding of how you can make wise decisions and deliver what is expected of you as a leader. It allows you to create and maintain strong relationships. It enables you to stand for yourself when called for or listen to others if you feel needing of advice and help. Here are some steps in owning your personal power:

1) Acknowledge and declare your aspirations. Know what you aspire for in life and declare it to others. Letting people know of your aspirations as well as your intentions is harnessing their support towards attaining it.

2) Only positive affirmations. Never entertain negative self-talk that holds you back. While it is good and sensible to weigh your options including possible pitfalls, only positivity will propel you forward to your goals. It is good to acknowledge your fears but always rise from it and keep your resolve towards your goals.

3) Advocate for yourself and others. Talk about your ideas and opinions. Be open about your suggestions and recommendations. Seek to contribute it proactively with that of others. That way not only do you push for your own agenda but strengthen it as well with that of others.

5) Build a supportive network. You can’t create a successful career in a vacuum. Seek advice from mentors and sponsors. Build mutually beneficial relationships with people you can help and who, in turn, champion your ideas, provide advice and the information you need to be successful.

6) Maintain a growth mind-set. Knowledge is power so be open about learning constantly. Be curious and seek for better ways.

Conflict is a normal occurrence in any human relationship. It looms when two or more persons or groups differ in ideas, interests, beliefs, or principles. Differing standpoints lead to disagreement and when one pushes further for a standpoint beyond the line of disagreement, argument likely happens. And when people argue and won’t settle to respect differing standpoints, conflict arises.

Differences are not triggers of conflict, not even disagreement. People always differ and may disagree from each other. Yet, they can agree to disagree still and respect each other’s differences. The line of conflict starts when one argues and challenges another’s standpoint to the point of disrespect. And when no one lets-up in disrespectful arguments, conflict blows-up.

Any animosity however trivial can trigger a full blown conflict unless timely and properly addressed. A trigger can escalate subtly or cunningly. It may start from mere envy or jealousy inflamed into biases and prejudices. It may be triggered by just a trivial issue aggravated into irritation and resentment. It may occur from feelings of insecurity or loss of morale exacerbated into doubt and distrust. Such triggers are volatile and when not taken-up into a cordial discussion and dialogue may escalate into serious differences and disagreement. And when not resolved properly, conflict is inevitable. Hence, conflict is best addressed prior not after triggers happen. This is the essence conflict management.

Conflict management can be defined simply as the proactive process of limiting the negative aspects of relations to prevent it from worsening into anything dismal to relationships and at the same time increasing the positive aspects of relations so as to enhance further understanding and respect. It is vital in keeping peace among nations or citizenry, among colleagues or co-workers, among friends or family members. Processes to thresh-out differences and attain agreement despite the disagreements have to be established as foothold of relationships. Such processes must involve cordial discussion and dialogue. And the aim is always towards cooperation, co-existence, and harmony.

In an organizational setting, conflict management is an essential facet of organizational management. It is geared towards efficiency and productivity. Processes and group dynamics are established to enhance learning, synchronize functions, improve group outcomes, and advance over-all performance thereby increasing productivity and achieving organizational efficiency.

Any manager of people, be he or she a- family head or home maker, group or team leader, store or production line supervisor, division or department chief, business executive or administrator- must strongly possess the following conflict management skills:

1) communication skills – the ability to allow expression of views on issues and perceived resolution to issues and to moderate even the most confrontational discussions to a level of calculated openness;

2) emotional intelligence - the ability to understand and handle one’s own feelings and that of others and afloat them to a calculated discussion gearing towards mutual understanding;

3) empathy - the ability to see a situation from someone else’s viewpoint and fathom both the expressed and unexpressed views and feelings; and

4) creative problem solving – ability to come up with a workable solutions from both expressed and unexpressed views and feelings and gear them towards collaborative resolutions of issues and problems.