#collegeproblems

Prepping for finals

When the Last Final Is Over

'Twas the week of finals, and all through the town Not a student was drinking, Not a frat made a sound The Adderall popped and the coffee was drank In hopes that your mind won’t suddenly blank The guys and the chicks depart from their beds While visions of passing danced around in their heads Crammed cafés and library dates Regretting the days that you slept in late The readings you ignored pile up to the ceiling Our asses are saved by Wikipedia stealing Time home for Thanksgiving was a bittersweet tease Come back to find college screwing you on your knees Facebook and Twitter prove a hefty temptation Earning your citizenship in the procrasti-NATION Increasingly worrisome for that borderline class Friday nights out made it impossible to pass All the moments we said “At least I have time” Well the time has come…. Did you do it? Neither did I Stressed and starved and screwed and sorry That we skipped lecture to eat Tim Hortons and watch Maury Sit down to find that you have to pee …and forgot your ONEcard, and pencil and scantron-F***ME! Exams handed out the questions complex Pray that it’s over, like a night of bad sex Winter break so close we can almost taste it High school friends,kegs spending every night wasted Eyes begin wandering while we’re cramped in our seats That one kid is dragged out for trying to cheat Smelly dude next to me, chill bro you’re fine! Lord knows that your grade will be better than mine Hand in the exam relieved that it’s done It’s been real, U of A, but far from fun One down, three to go and to all that relate: HAPPY FINALS TO ALL AND TO ALL PASSING GRADES!

failing a test you studied really hard for