MARK Z. DANIELEWSKI
House of Leaves (2000);
photos by G. Ngayu, or @monstertalent

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MARK Z. DANIELEWSKI
House of Leaves (2000);
photos by G. Ngayu, or @monstertalent

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i do not want to live in the fucking panopticon fuck the camera that blinks above me at work, the tv watching me at the store, the "smile you're on camera" signs, the ring cameras, the flock cameras, the apps to track your child or partner, the activist friends telling me "just assume everything you do in public is being recorded somewhere", the government building protester databases, the teslas recording every move all around them, the knowledge that everything i type or search or save is being tracked and logged, the ads and search suggestions that mysteriously know what i was just talking about, the way biometrics keep creeping into more places, the way my car spies on me, the way my phone spies on me, the way there is nowhere to go to get away from it!!! no wonder the internet is full of vindictive little stalkers and witchhunts when it's the water and the air of society from the culture to the infrastructure
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We regret to inform you that the sunshine and friendship app is actually a children killing app.

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Built over 1,000 years ago in the dead center of an ocean of sand dunes, nobody actually knows who constructed this circular fortress. This is Ksar Draa in Timimoun, Algeria. An ancient architectural marvel whose true origin story is completely lost to time.
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I can’t do a captcha without getting mad now. Like it was always kinda irritating to do it anyways, but now knowing it’s used to train ai just pisses me off. Like man I don’t wanna train your ai so I can use your website. Fuck off.
Fun activities to try this fall!
Make a deal with an ancient deity
Run away from society
Grow another pair of eyes
Forfeit your corporeal form
Become The Thing in the woods
Continue haunting this Earth for millennia to come
ℑ 𝔩𝔦𝔤𝔥𝔱 𝔪𝔶 𝔱𝔬𝔯𝔠𝔥 & 𝔟𝔲𝔯𝔫 𝔦𝔱 ℑ 𝔞𝔪 𝔱𝔥𝔢 𝔟𝔢𝔞𝔰𝔱 ℑ 𝔴𝔬𝔯𝔰𝔥𝔦𝔭
◆ Delhaxe knuckleduster revolver ~ Liege, Belgium (c.1870) via Czerny’s ⬣ two solutions, one grip

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I’m obsessed with this video
things girls like
concrete
rusty metal
vast pools of water
overgrown foliage
a dense fog covering the land
broken machinery
a landscape of ancient structures too vast for one to fully explore in a single lifetime
pettings her snout nicely
GEORGE: [ABRUPTLY, AFTER SILENCE] “I mean, I feel like I understand trans people.”
[JERRY STARES AT GEORGE FROM ACROSS THE TABLE IN CONFUSION AND DISBELIEF FOR SEVERAL SECONDS]
JERRY: “You understand trans people?”
GEORGE: “Is that so hard to believe?”
JERRY: “I find it hard to believe you understand yourself.”
GEORGE: “But that’s kind of my point, see. When one life isn’t working out, you can just try to find one that does. You’re doing your best as Danny, things aren’t going great… [GEORGE CLAPS HIS HANDS FOR EMPHASIS]… give it a second go as a Deborah.”
JERRY: “Like a do-over.”
GEORGE: “A do-over.”
JERRY: [PICKS UP COFFEE CUP] “I don’t think that’s what’s going on.” [DRINKS COFFEE]
GEORGE: [COMPLETELY IGNORING THIS] “And I get that. I really do. Because things have never worked out for George. George has never been able to stick the landing. But Georgina? [HE CHUCKLES CONFIDENTLY] Georgina’s going places.”
JERRY: “Georgina.”
GEORGE: “It’s a work in progress.”
JERRY: “Ya know, I think that the trans community is facing enough challenges without you being in the mix.”
GEORGE: “What, are you implying they’re too good for me?”
JERRY: “Not implying, no.”
A little drink and a smoke to take the edge off
These posts are sisters

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Finally, when shame has been completely internalized, nothing about you is okay. You feel flawed and inferior; you have the sense of being a failure. There is no way you can share your inner self because you are an object of contempt to yourself. When you are contemptible to yourself, you are no longer in you. To feel shame is to feel seen in an exposed and diminished way. When you're an object to yourself, you turn your eyes inward, watching and scrutinizing every minute detail of behavior. This internal critical observation is excruciating. It generates a tormenting self-consciousness which Kaufman describes as, "creating a binding and paralyzing effect upon the self." This paralyzing internal monitoring causes withdrawal, passivity and inaction.
John Bradshaw, Healing the Shame that Binds You