I've made a quotebook from things me, my family, my friends, my friends's friends, and ex-friends have said. These are my favorites
“We need more female pedophiles.” - 2023
“I don’t care how dyslexic you are, it’s still Monday.” - 2023
“North Korea doesn't substitute a digestive tract.” -2023
“Currently I can only communicate through voice memos and emojis.” - 2023
“Milk will not save you from concrete.” - 2023
“BRUNO MARS IS BLACK?!” - 2023
"I’m going to cleanse you with holiness, and by that I mean I’m going to kill you.” - 2023
“WHAT DO YOU MEAN YOU’RE OUT OF CROISSANTS?!” -1988
“I can’t eat your kidney I’m a pescatarian.” - 2023
“I don’t think Temmie’s are submissive and breedable, I think they just go through mitosis.” - 2023
“If you go inside of this worm, I'm setting this whole place on fire." - 2023
“What the FUCK is a pinch of salt?!” - 2023
"arms are practically the same as cars." - 2023
“How do you spell Tetanus again?” - 2024
"Screw you, Washington, and your mattress sales" - 2024
“I'm sorry, but you're built like a guitar.” - 2024
“Do you think children would fit in a blender well?” - 2024
“You could draw a graph with that dog.” - 2024
“Imagine being a skeleton with epilepsy.” - 2024
"if I was homeless, I'd live there" - 2024
“This was drawn by a gay person” - 2024
“Here's me taking selfies in an ambulance.” - 2024
"you're my Glasgow to my coma scale.” - 2024
“You have crabs in your trachea" - 2024
“And then he just pissed himself and died.” - 2024
“HE'S A NAZI…. HE'S GAY, EVEN WORSE!” - 2024
“I can't call the ambulance in front of the cheerleaders, that'll scare them!” - 2024
“God dammit, the police aren't gonna help me. I'm gonna buy a candle.” - 2024
“Hearing frogs is a symptom of a panic attack. Other symptoms include: panic, panic, panic, panic…” - 2024
“Here's where I got hit by a car.” - 2024
“My evil cauldron of root beer.” - 2024
“My friend made a fanfiction about 9/11 and she called the Southern tower shawty.” - 2024
"OSAMA BIN LADEN!?" - 2024
“My brain is up there mewing.” - 2024
“And then this lady came and was like, ‘yo, I'm gonna stab you.” - 2024
“Greg, give me your bones.” - 2024
*Gestures to drawing* “this is not an ethnicity.” - 2024
“I don't want to see men kissing… Okay, I DO want to see men kissing, but not right now.” - 2025
“Maybe Donald Trump is right. Maybe I do need my rights taken away.” - 2025
“I put 2024 instead of 2025, I'm gonna kill myself.” - 2025
“I prefer to be barefoot, unless Trump is doing a backflip.” - 2025
"I could easily assassinate my robot president" - 2025
“They added taxes to Pressure.” - 2025
"Silence, bulldozer" - 2025
“I think all mold is racist.” - 2025
“Do you ever wake up with riddles on your walls?” - 2025
“I had a chair and everything; I still lost :(“ - 2025
"the sitcom of immense horror and dread" - 2025
“We can torture him in an hour :] (we couldn't)" - 2025
“Here's the wall of pain and suffering.” - 2025
“Now my nose has… Flavor.” - 2025
*Several seconds of silence* “✨ You're mentally ill✨” - 2025
“Well, you're dead, so your opinion doesn't matter.” - 2025
“Infinite money glitch: kill yourself.” - 2025
“God is like a staple gun!” - 2022
“And the foundation said ‘Nuh-uh’” - 2025
I'm having a seizure, shut the fuck up.” - 2025
“I love deciphering your typos like I'm interrogating a dementia patient” - 2025
"anything above a certain decibel count and she's pressing charges" - 2025
“I'm going to reverse engineer your organs.” - 2025
“DON'T KILL YOURSELF, YOU'RE BISEXUAL.” - 2025
"Draco Malfoy is your gorilla" - 2024
"That was after the microwave incident” - 2025
“I imagine you're very absorbent.” - 2025
“You are in cardiac arrest. This is your heart. And this is Lady Gaga.” - 2025
“If you see someone collapse on the street, assume they were breathing beforehand.” - 2025
“If you don’t know what the shape of a banana is, I cannot help you in life” - 2025
“Refrigerator time.” - 2025
“You fucking moron, I just told you I'm immune to electricity" - 2025
“‘What are you going to do? Is god going to come kill us?’ and then god shows up.” - 2025
“I suddenly develop rabies whenever someone touches my food.” - 2025
“I just realised, my teeth are still in my pocket.” - 2025
“The cops don't legally exist outside of Ghana, so we're good.” - 2025
"It’s not shouting racism at you. It's just letting you know 'hey, I'm gonna kill black people.'" - 2025
“He's trying to kill God with a shotgun. Unfortunately, she's immortal.” - 2025
“I need to know if leeches are racist.” - 2025
“I am going to fill your dreams with the incomprehensible horrors and see if you come out unscathed” - 2025
“Relative to Greece, where is this body of water?” - 2026
“It's like a school bully, but the school bully is the school. They took my lunch money." - 2026
“I want to be a blunt object." - 2026
“By the way, we're gay. And we hate you" - 2026
“Btw, I have some corpses in there.” - 2026
“But y'know, if you're shot in the head, you'll be alright I guess.” - 2026
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