CodaAtTheEnd

Team Soulfire – Like a hermit crab, you outgrew this house a long time ago. It hurts, but you still want to hold onto your Home

ao3 link

stars. 

everything was stars. 

iron. blood. stardust. swirling around in his head. 

quackity stumbles back, hitting the wall. techno was long gone, the traitor was never one to stick around.

echos of bone crunching plays in his ears. bone.  his bones.

he stays there paralyzed, cowering prey under the predators long gone gaze. he swears the blood-red gaze still watches him. 

the world spins around him. a dizzying mix of reds and browns.

he cradles the pickaxe like his own child. it’s the only thing he has left. the iron. 

waiting. 

waiting. 

hours go by. 

all the time in high school. I

called them Indeed Cats

All he’s ever brought with him is misery. Zam can’t look them in the eye. This is beyond agony. 

Then there’s the sound of a sword being retracted. And then all Zam remembers is thinking how poetic the rain washing away Vitalasy’s blood is—just like how he was washed away as an afterthought, again. He says nothing. There’s nothing left to say.

Tubbo (and Tommy) – The pain of losing someone by who’s side you are meant to be

Tommy and Tubbo – The soul bond, ripped and twisted, still tied to my arms and heart

I've been resource gathering for YEARS so now I am going to share my dragons hoard

Floorplanner. Design and furnish a house for you to use for having a consistent background in your comic or anything! Free, you need an account, easy to use, and you can save multiple houses.

Comparing Heights. Input the heights of characters to see what the different is between them. Great for keeping consistency. Free.

Magma. Draw online with friends in real time. Great for practice or hanging out. Free, paid plan available, account preferred.

Smithsonian Open Access. Loads of free images. Free.

SketchDaily. Lots of pose references, massive library, is set on a timer so you can practice quick figure drawing. Free.

SculptGL. A sculpting tool which I am yet to master, but you should be able to make whatever 3d object you like with it. free.

Pexels. Free stock images. And the search engine is actually pretty good at pulling up what you want.

Figurosity. Great pose references, diverse body types, lots of "how to draw" videos directly on the site, the models are 3d and you can rotate the angle, but you can't make custom poses or edit body proportions. Free, account option, paid plans available.

Line of Action. More drawing references, this one also has a focus on expressions, hands/feet, animals, landscapes. Free.

Animal Photo. You pose a 3d skull model and select an animal species, and they give you a bunch of photo references for that animal at that angle. Super handy. Free.

Why did they try to identify the mystery girl using her shoe size? Because the bullheaded king’s only clue to her identity was the shoe the Grand Duke picked up off the steps.

Why didn’t the prince recognize her by her face? Because his father wouldn’t involve him in the process at all, and wasn’t the one going around trying to find her.

Why did the prince want to marry a lady he only met that night? Because his father was going to force him to marry someone, and he genuinely liked this woman.

Why did Cinderella want to marry a man she only met that night? Because marriage was her best and most secure way to freedom. Fucked up, but you can’t say it’s unrealistic for the setting of a fairy tale. She also genuinely liked him.

If they’re using the slipper to find her, wouldn’t it be more sensible to search for the person with the other slipper? Yes. The King is purposefully nonsensical and the Duke is purposefully terrified enough of him to carry out his orders to the letter. Furthermore, they end up doing that in the end anyway, because the Duke’s glass slipper is shattered, and Cinderella brings out the one she has to prove her identity.

Why didn’t the stepmother and stepsisters recognize Cinderella at the ball? Because they were dancing too far away, and then left the party to dance in private, which was possible because the King wanted very badly for his son to hit it off with someone and tried to arrange the best conditions for that to happen.

Why didn’t Cinderella save herself? Because in real life, abuse victims should not have to shoulder that responsibility, and usually can’t. In real life, you need and deserve an external support system. Asking for help, in this kind of situation, is very important. She is saved by others because she is loved. Because she is not alone. Because she has friends who love her, and want her to be happy and safe and free. Because in real life, people who want to help someone who is suffering are like the mice. We can’t pull out miracle solutions, but we can provide companionship and if we’re in the right place at the right time, we can help the person find a better life.

Why didn’t the fairy godmother save Cinderella from her abusive household, or try to help her sooner? Because she’s magic, and magic can’t solve your problems. Quote: “Like all dreams, well, I’m afraid it can’t last forever.” This (and Cinderella’s dream of going to the ball) is a metaphor for pleasurable things in bad circumstances. An ice cream won’t get rid of your depression, but it will provide you with momentary happiness to bolster you, as well as the reminder that happiness in general is still possible for you. Cinderella doesn’t want to go to the ball so she can get away from her stepmother and stepsisters, or so she can meet someone to marry and leave with. She wants to go to the ball to remind herself that she can still have things she wants. That her desires matter. This is important because the movie does a very good job of illustrating Lady Tremaine’s subtle abuse tactics, all of which invisibly press the message that Cinderella doesn’t matter. While going to the ball and fulfilling her dreams may not be a victory in the material sense, it is still a victory against Lady Tremaine’s efforts.

Why is Cinderella’s choice to be kind and obedient framed as a good thing, when you are not obligated to be kind to your abuser? This one walks a very fine line, but I think the movie still makes it make sense. Lady Tremaine never acknowledges her cruelty. She always frames her punishments of Cinderella as Cinderella’s fault. Cinderella is interrupting, Cinderella is shirking her duties, Cinderella is playing vicious practical jokes. Cinderella is still a member of the family, of course she can go to the ball, provided she meet these impossible conditions. Lady Tremaine’s tactics are designed to make Cinderella feel like she must always be in the wrong and her stepmother must always be in the right. If Cinderella calls her stepmother out on her cruelty, or attempts to fight back, Lady Tremaine can frame that as Cinderella being ungrateful, cruel, broken, evil, etc. If Cinderella responds to her stepmother’s cruelty defiantly (in the way she’s justified to), she’s not taking control out of Lady Tremaine’s hands. Disobedience can be spun back into her stepmother’s control. She wants Cinderella to be angry and sad and show how much she’s hurting. So since Cinderella is adapting to her situation, she chooses to be kind. Not only because she naturally wants to be and it’s part of her personality, but because it is a form of defiance in its own way, and it allows her to keep a reminder of her agency and value. Her choice to be kind is her chance to keep her own narrative alive: she is not obeying because her stepmother wants her to and she has to do what her stepmother does, but because she wants to. It’s a small distinction, but one that makes all the difference in terms of keeping her hope and identity. (Fuck, I wrote a whole paragraph about how this doesn’t mean you can’t be angry at people who hurt you or that you need to be kind to deserve help, and then deleted it by accident. Uh. Try again.) Expressing anger and pain is an important part of regaining autonomy and healing. Although it is commendable to be kind while you are suffering, it is NOT required for you to get help or be worthy of help. If Cinderella’s recovery was explored beyond “happily ever after” she would need to let herself be angry and sad to heal. Cinderella is not only kind because it comes naturally to her, but because it’s her defense against the abuse she’s suffering. Everyone’s story and experiences are different, and one does not invalidate the other.

Bonus round for answers that aren’t part of the movie:

Why didn’t Cinderella run away? Where would she go? Genuinely, in hundreds-of-years-ago France, where would she go if she snuck out of the window with a change of clothes? With her step-family, she’s miserable and abused, but she’s fed, clothed, and in no danger of dying or being taken advantage of by anyone other than her stepmother and stepsisters. Even if she escapes and manages to find financial security, her stepmother might be able to find her and get her back.

Why didn’t Cinderella burn the house down with them inside it/slit their throats in the night/poison their food/etc.? Because that’s a revenge fantasy, and this story is a fantasy about being saved. There’s nothing wrong with making Cinderella into a revenge fantasy. That’s perfectly fine, as long as you acknowledge that the other type of fantasy is also a valid interpretation. (I mean, the original fairy tale features the stepsisters getting their feet mutilated and all three of them getting their eyes pecked out, so go for it.)

Why isn’t Cinderella more proactive in general? Because she’s a child who has been abused for the back half of her life, who has had to be focused on survival because. you know. she’s an abused kid.

Cinderella’s kindness is her armor. Her kindness is her keeping safe against Lady Tremaine. Because in the movie, when Anastasia finds Gus under her cup, Cinderella tries to defend herself. She tries to tell Lady Tremaine that she can’t possibly think she did this on purpose, and Lady Tremaine sharply cuts her off, which is one of the few times she’s actually sharp at Cinderella. It’s only ever when Cinderella is not obedient or contrite that Lady Tremaine is even sharp at all.

Cinderella defending herself is met with a quick, “Hold your tongue.” Cinderella saying she’s already cleaned the thing she’s ordered to clean is met with a biting “Do them again.” And then in that scene when Cinderella finally relents and says “yes, Stepmother” is when Lady Tremaine relaxes and speaks softly again.

The only other time in the movie Lady Tremaine yells at Cinderella is when Cinderella interrupts the music lesson with the invite to the ball. Somehow, Cinderella has learned that aggression begets aggression, that emotion begets emotion, and so in being kind and quiet she keeps Lady Tremaine kind and quiet (on the surface, anyway).

When Cinderella speaks up that she wants to go to the ball, Lady Tremaine allows her to speak because she’s presenting it calmly. “I’m still a member of the family, and an eligible maiden.” She’s not angry, just matter-of-fact, so Lady Tremaine is matter-of-fact about it. Of course you can go, provided you finish your responsibilities. Toe the line and we’ll allow you to go.

Cinderella allows herself to break and cry only when Lady Tremaine leaves the house. It is after that door closes that Cinderella finally cracks and cries and has this flood of emotion as she runs through the house to the yard and allows herself to let it all out. Because she will not allow herself to give that emotional ammunition to Lady Tremaine. She will not give Lady Tremaine an ounce of emotion to play off of.

And when Lady Tremaine locks her in her room and she breaks again, crying and begging, Lady Tremaine bounces it right back by cruelly and smugly walking away to keep Cinderella away from her one chance at leaving. Because saying anything at all is unnecessary at this point; the action is crueler than anything Lady Tremaine could say.

me: great!

scam caller: good. I’m calling because your IP address has been compromised. I’ll just need you to get in front of your computer so we can get your account fixed up.

me: okay! there is one thing I’m wondering, though

scam caller: what?

me: you really couldn’t think of a better lie?

scam caller:

me: like, my “IP address has been compromised.” How, exactly, does an IP address become “compromised”?

scam caller:

me: I was just wondering, is all

scam caller: why did you answer?

me:

me: what?

scam caller: if you knew this wasn’t a legitimate call, then why did you answer?

me: oh, I just though I would have some fun at your expense.

scam caller: what expense? talking is no expense to me.

me: well, you’re currently not accomplishing your goal

scam caller: my goal?

me: your goal of scamming my elderly grandmother. You’re not accomplishing that. I’d call that an expense.

scam caller: well, can I scam you?

me:

me: did you- did you ask if you can scam me?

scam caller: yes. can I scam you?

me, baffled: sure, you can try

scam caller: you need to get in front of your computer

me: yeah, that’s still a problem. I’m eating tater tots right now and I really don’t feel like getting up.

scam caller: okay. I will call you tomorrow morning, then.

me: I might not answer. My grandma definitely won’t.

scam caller: You answered today.

me: …touché?

Director Maria Kleinheart wasn't the sort of person who asked indirect or idle questions. She was in every way a Kleinheart, the spitting image of her grandmother. Only she wasn't staring out from a yellowed ad in a back issue of Popular Science or Woman's Day, she was staring from across desk made of polished slate.

Emil Martin didn't respond immediately. That sort of question usually came with an invitation to services or a badgering about Pascal's wager. That didn't fit what he knew about the director, though that wasn't much. An intense religious conversion would explain the rumors around her distance from the rest of her family.

"Director, is this a personal or work related question?" Emil finally asked.

"Work." She replied.

"Is that appropriate?"

"Yes. This is about security clearances."

That made even less sense. Emil decided to risk a lecture on his eternal soul and answered truthfully. "Pretty standard, insufficient evidence."

"Would you rather it be true?" She asked. "Would it be comforting to know you existed for a purpose, that someone was in charge of your existence, caring for you?"

"Not really." Emil replied. "I'm rather Hitchenisan in that regard."

"Good enough. Follow me."

-

"BE NOT AFRAID."

The words seemed to come out of the air itself. The thing was at the center of the large, expansive lab that had once been a missile silo. It was a sphere, surrounded by two rings of brass-like metal. The rings were lined with hemispherical semi-translucent white glass or crystal protrusions. The inner ring spun slowly, as did the central core, though only the faintest irregularities in its glowing blue-white corona revealed that motion.

The outer ring was held in place with steel chains, each link six inches in diameter. Two chains locked the ring to the floor, while a third latched the top to the ceiling. The cuffs the chains connected to seemed to have been welded shut around it.

"BE NOT AFRAID." It 'spoke' again. Its voice was clear and musical, but wrong and artificial at the same time. It sounded like familiar voices; his mother and father, his cousins, his old school pals, his boyfriends, even Director Kleinheart, each synthesized poorly via an AI speech simulator, all speaking in perfect time.

Every time it spoke, Emil smelled his grandfather's sweet cornbread fresh from the oven.

"That looks like an angel." He finally gasped.

"Looks like." Director Kleinheart smiled. He wasn't sure she could do that. "I knew we picked the right man."

"This is why you were asking about my beliefs?"

"Yes Doctor Martin. You see, freedom of religion is an extension of the principle of innocence until proven guilty. Once one faith is shown to be correct, all others are revealed as wrong."

"And you wanted to make sure I, what, wasn't guilty of being wrong?"

"No, the mistaken are innocent of everything except the actions they directly take." Kleinheart continued. "It's the ones who would take this to mean they were right that are fifth columnists to an unaccountable alien power."

"Oh." Emil replied. He didn't know quite what else to say.

"I want you on our team that's studying it. We need to know how it works, what it's made of, what those things its made of can be used for, you know the drill."

"BE NOT AFRAID." Again came the smell of cornbread.

"Are the restraints necessary?" Emil asked. "It is telling us we don't need to be afraid of it."

"Oh, we thought that too at first." The director said. "But we've already learned quite a bit about our little intruder here, even a bit of its 'source code' for lack of a better analogue. That message isn't meant for us."

"What is it then?"

"Can't you guess, Doctor?"

Dr. Emil Martin shrugged. "I have no idea."

"It isn't giving us a warning."

Director Kleinheart smiled for the second time in Emil's memory and spoke again.

"It's repeating its orders."