Dating Disasters

Why do single people on apps ask you why YOU are single??? Like I don’t fuckin know it’s wild to me too, bro

Quarantine day 8179: I continue to take my birth control pills which has now only become a daily reminder that I am not having sex.

I kid you not. Today, a guy unmatched me on Hinge because I said I was willing to get sushi To Go.

Quarantine day 16: the most attention I have gotten from a man was today while on my run. Thank you, sir, for honking your horn at me. I’ve never felt more wanted

The directions told me it would make 6-9 pancakes, but I only yielded 3. And I’m drinking milk straight from the bottle. Quarantine rules are wild.

Social distancing is just my typical Friday night cleverly disguised as public health awareness

I just started watching this season of the bachelor - I have NEVER watched this show. And these girls... they are emotional train wrecks and he is just totally fine with it! NBD! And he is emotionally AVAILABLE - crying alllll the time. Like what the fuck is this? The upside down?

If there’s one thing dating apps have done for me, it is that they have single-handedly brought my self esteem to an ultimate, new low

Just went out with the “he doesn’t realize he’s gay” guy