it’s been 10 years of this

Every Adult In “Harry Potter” Let Us Down At Some Point And That’s Important a 900 page dissertation by me

And that includes Joanne Kathleen Rowling a tear stained afterword by me

Hagrid Is The Exception a rebuttal by me

The Time Hagrid Told Voldemort How to Take Out Something Protecting an Object that Grants Immortality When He Was Drunk and Other Well-Meaning Fuck Ups a lengthy chapter

You’re Absolutely Right a retraction

How dare you assume Molly Weasley has done anything wrong ever

That Time Molly Yelled At The Twins And Ron For Saving Harry From Abuse And Starvation, Thus Likely Communicating To The Abused Kid In Her Presence That His Welfare Was Less Important Than Not Borrowing The Car, That Time Molly Was Utterly Condescending About How Harry Is A Child And Doesn’t Deserve To Know Anything In A Way That Probably Heightened His Determination To Prove Otherwise, That Time Molly Said The Twins Put Together Aren’t As Good As Any Of Their Brothers Over OWL Results That They Worked Hard On And Were Proud Of, That Time Molly Forcibly Cut Her Adult Son’s Hair Right Before His Wedding, That Time Molly Spent A Year Being Mean And Rejectful Toward Her Son’s Fiancee, That Time Molly Sent Hermione A Deliberate “Fuck You” Present For Easter Because She Believed A False Story Written In Witch Weekly Without Making Any Attempt To Ask The People Actually Involved, Those Times She Made Her Youngest Son’s Christmas Sweaters His Least Favorite Color, And Every Time She Belittled Her Husband’s Hobby, The Twins’ Interests, And Bill’s Appearance Because She Couldn’t Be Bothered To Understand Or Value Or Even Be Kind About Them a detailed reminder that no one’s perfect and sometimes what one person doesn’t mind or see hits another person hard

Florean Fortescue Just Wanted To Sell Some Ice Cream And Help Harry With His Homework He Is The Only Adult Who Didn’t Mess Up Until Getting Killed By Voldemort, RIP an increasingly strident addendum by me

OK You’re Absolutely Right Florean Fortescue Was In Fact Perfect As Far As I’m Aware a concession by me

Charlie Weasley Just Wanted To Play With Dragons a fond reminder by me

If There Were Zero Expectations For Lockhart From The Start, Did He Technically Let Us Down? An inquiry

You’re Technically Correct, You Can’t Be Let Fown If You’re Already On The Ground an amused afterword

it IS a phase, mom

show me a permanent state of the self, mom

Impermanence does not mean insignificance, mom

The key to a happier life is being in a constant state of change and acceptance, mom

fanfiction is so wild cause im like…..ugh im not in the mood to read a book…..i’ll just read an 82k word fic instead……

Look…. To start a book… You have to make room in yourself for new characters and worlds. Do I look like I have the emotional energy for that? Do I look like I can trust like that right now? Just show me the things I already know pay good returns on my investment, except I also want to read something new so I guess they can be in a coffee shop this time.

This - this is it, you’ve put it into words

i don't WANT to live in a society i want to live in a bookstore cafe

god i fuckin love airports. who came up with that??? “yeah, planes land here and take off. what if we also made it a mall, and then removed everyone’s sense of time and space when they came inside?” it could be 8:33 in the morning in a time zone i have never experienced but it’s always Airport Time

the norms there are so bizarre. who cares. wear your bugs bunny sweats over a button down. who gives a shit? nobody’s going to yell at you for chugging four sprites. you just do that. that’s the void talking

no more toxic friendships or relationships, only toxic by britney spears.