Clo: todo lo que esconde...o no.

Me: mom, dad I’m applying for a job at google Them: *stare at me in desbelief* is it to finally prove that you’re a mature, dignified young woman? Me: Me: Me: they have an indoor slide r u shitting me right now

THEY ALSO HAVE A BALL PIT DO YOU UNDERSTAND ME A /BALL PIT/.

This NEEDS more reblogs

I just love Santa more now.

is there a term for cockblock when two ppl with vaginas are involved??

clitoris prohibitus

Sounds like a fucking spell from harry potter

i used to think tumblr ruined my sense of humor but actually it improved since i no longer laugh at racist and sexist s**t and instead laugh at ‘egg’

Hell yeah dude

I’m not crying there’s just a tree branch in my eye.

Oh look, a boulder's in my eye. Not crying, nothing to worry about.

Have you ever bullshitted an assignment so hard you basically laugh after every sentence you write

"I don’t love him but he’s here and you aren’t"

:’)

i don’t even know this snake and i feel guilty for not being there