amra watching dramas

under the cut to avoid spoiling peeps

but what i really liked in this episode is that we see there's another layer: the class difference he feels much more keenly than she does

it hurts him to see her in the kitchen cooking to feed his bros, because he's an honorable period man, and though having been poor, he doesn't see the poor as dirt, class is still engrained in him. he disdains the frivolities of the rich, but he still wants to give his upper-class-born wife that upper class life

so when sanniang encourages him to just marry her, notice how he says first she doesn't see marriage as more than a business partnership

...and you think this means he's waiting for her to love him. but actually, he says he already knows she has feelings for him, though she might not be very consciously aware:

he wants a place in her heart, but he says he already knows he's there. and he says it's enough!

sooo... what's he waiting for then?

Me watching the scene:

This man destroyed the reputation of an innocent woman just cuz he couldn't stand up to his mother! Not to mention the fact he asked her to go against her friend for him, and she did!

What honor and nobility does he think she would have after that? And what right does he have to judges her for it?

I may not like Fan Yake, but I despise this man even more!

At least in Fan Yake's case, she is actually haunted by the events. She does feel guilty underneath, which is why she tries so hard to deny it. She listens to her maid and try to blame Tingyun for things, she tries to portray Tingyun as evil in her head just so she could feel better about herself.

What about Yu Jing Xiu? Nothing.

He destroyed the life of a woman in a whim and never ever thought about it again. No guilt and no remorse. He even doubles down on it by calling the moron Zuo son to destroy her reputation once again.

Yet he has absolutely no doubt about his own nobility!

This drama, in general, is not afraid to have its characters be covered in grime and blood. I mention this because idol dramas don't do it nowadays. We get the elegantly coughing blood scenes or the scenes where FL gets kidnapped or almost dies and not one of her hair is out of place. But here, these characters get covered in their vomit, they have grime and blood on them and not in an elegant/cool way, they lose again and again, the ML actually fears and his hand trembles (that scene in ep 5 when real Jiuwenjiao shows up), the FL isn't suddenly badass all the time like she gets offered a dagger for protection and she is hesitant to take it, the ML makes sure to eat the bread crumbs not wasting even one piece.

It's obviously not prestige drama levels of real and grimy, but for an idol drama? It's been a while since we got leads fallen so down on the ladder and actually suffering from it. Of course, there's plot armour and coincidences like meeting the very-mysterious-guy-who's-totally-not-the-crown-prince in some temple, but that's fine because that comes with the genre.

#must not forget to flirt when I can

It's pretty telling that it's after this scene, which 110% makes her hot under the collar, that she brings up marriage again. She might talk about all the pragmatic reasons for it (but so many of them sound like care for him even so - like making his meals and his career easier) but the underpinning is desire, even if she does not consciously realize it.

She advised him to hand over all of Jiuweijiao's business to the Crown Prince so he ceases being a target of everyone in the salt trade and so the Crown Prince doesn't hold Jiuweijiao's identity over his head. He advises her on how to deal with the military wives when she's lost on what to do since her plan only made the wives more hostile.

It's hilarious that she tells him about the crown prince as if it's the most exciting news! An opportunity!

While to him, dealing with royals sounds like the premise of his worst nightmare