This boy. Both my boys and baby. They are my world. And sadly I feel like we’ve done none but let them down this year so far. (Technically we’ve been letting them down since this move) His mom did buy us a trailer, a cheap handy man special. But still. It’s a roof over our heads and we can keep the pets. Plus is 50% cheaper than our last place. It does need work tho. The driving anxiety took over again during the whole harassment issues with the last landlady. She’s harass us at work. She’s harass us at home. Peaking in the windows. Letting herself in when we weren’t home. It doesn’t make any sense but it had me fucked up because every where I went I could be harassed, maybe? Either way, it has stopped me from driving. I have not driven in months. The snow was to blame for some of that too. I’ve never driven on the shit and I’m a nervous inexperienced driver. Anyway because of this James has not been able to work because he’s chauffeuring me around. At one point he loaned the car to his friend and then agreed to selling it to him at tax time. Which we had discussed doing in the future, like when it’s time for a 3rd row and we decide to see it we’d ask Matt first. James and his selective fucking hearing. Anyway I became upset because I wasn’t ready to give up and let her go and because I was paying for a car I no longer owned. We have since got it back but he’s supposed to be breaking the news to him tonight that we’re not selling. And then to fuck shit up even more. I quit my job. Everyone understands because I was completely shit on and underpaid. Especially after the cashier making almost 6$ more than I do as a supervisor. Then them refusing to fix it. Plus everything being dumped on me like truck when I’m pregnant and already had issues from unloading the truck. We’ve got the federal tho so we’re using that to cover some shit for a while until J brings in a paycheck because he’s getting a job. Monday the hunt begins and I know he can find a better paying job than what I had. He wants me to focus on school. Maybe do couponing and shit, spend some time with my boys. Hopefully this works out. This is fucking 30 and the struggle is real.








