Cious the Wanne

I apologize for my mood always swung to the moon into hiding, or sometimes flown into carousel wheels always turning for a different view. I’ve noticed sometimes my hormones are stronger than my brain, and my emotions tend to kneel over its supremacy with its overwhelming proportions taking me over. I just long to say that whatever I do, or say, at this point of time in every month, that I am trying my best to control it for you. I’d tend to be sensitive, and irrational, always introspecting into simple words I give meanings I plucked from my memories which left me doubtful. But I’m more careful now. Because I know I hurt you too often, and I’m just lucky you’re always so strong against the blows. I’m always surprised you take it lightly, and still think that leaving me at this time wasn’t right, because you know I’m sensitive, irrational, moody. Perhaps it’s because you know it wasn’t me. Whatever the reason is, I’m grateful you understand how sometimes that happens because I just love you too much, or miss you too much. I can be a little hard to handle, or tolerate but it’s astonishing how you make it seem easy to still love me despite all that.

And I understand. I understand why people hold hands: I’d always thought it was about possessiveness, saying ‘This is mine’. But it’s about maintaining contact. It is about speaking without words. It is about I want you with me and don’t go.