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This isn't just for when they're putting their hands on them. This goes for verbal abuse, emotional abuse, psychological abuse, financial abuse—whatever it is. Talk to them with grace and kindness, or do not speak.

Y'all push these people further and further into the arms of their abusers every single time you make a mean comment or a snide remark or something nasty. Every single time, not only are you kicking somebody who's already down, but you are validating all of the awful things that their partner has taught them to feel about themselves.

If their partner has taught them that they are alone in this world and that nobody likes them because they're not a good decision maker or they're not very bright, and you get on here and say that they're very foolish and a little stupid for staying, guess what they're gonna do.

Y'all aren't dishing out tough love. You're not giving a much-needed reality check. Nine times out of ten, y'all are just being mean to somebody because you see them as less than you. It's not helpful, and quite frankly, it doesn't even make you feel good for more than—I don't know—30 seconds. All you're doing is setting someone further back."

John Singer Sargent (1856–1925)

"Woman in bed", sketchbook page, 1872

shortest possible story is that he he got arrested and hospitalized after walking around outside at night, MAYBE having 'an episode', MAYBE he was drunk, maybe he was high, maybe he was just being loud, who knows. Dude was outside at night in boxers and cowboy boots and that's all he did to "invite" police interaction.

But cops claimed he assaulted them so he gets arrested. Then goes to the hospital. Then goes back into custody.

And then he's not heard of for a while, then days later says he's out and okay. But facing FELONY charges!

Almost a year later, Lil Nas X is out of a mental health rehab program, looking good, saying he feels really good, and seems to be on the way up after all of this. I'm really happy for him. I hope he has good genuine support in his life through family, friends, and folks rooting on him that he can count on.

I am really disappointed but not surprised how quickly a lot of media support for him disappeared, especially queer papers. An interview from before the police incident really highlighted how many people wanted him to fail and wanted to see him fall, including certain pockets within communities that should have has his back.