found this while organizing my old files, not half as hilarious as the original but still made me laugh and thatβs somethinβ right
taylor price
Show & Tell

shark vs the universe
Monterey Bay Aquarium

PR's Tumblrdome

β

Origami Around
sheepfilms
Misplaced Lens Cap


Product Placement

pixel skylines
h

η₯ζ₯ / Permanent Vacation

titsay
almost home
Alisa U Zemlji Chuda
Sweet Seals For You, Always
DEAR READER
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@chosenroseoftheforest
found this while organizing my old files, not half as hilarious as the original but still made me laugh and thatβs somethinβ right

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I think suplexing a man would fix me. not even in a sexual way lads
just remembered what my username is
Swarovski can continue to fuck off.
In 2021, Swarovski (the company that makes the very sparkly crystals you see in certain jewelry, on figure-skaters' twinkliest outfits, on red carpet dresses), decided they didn't want the grubby fingers of small-time jewelers, clothing designers and costumers and crafters on their shiny beads and rhinestones anymore. They decided to limit their sales to "luxury" and couture creators, not girls who sell stuff on Etsy. The tenor of their press release on the subject was snide and insulting. Resellers (like your favorite bead shop) would no longer be allowed to carry their product; the average Jane on the street would not be able to purchase them. You could only get them if you had an authorized business agreement that bound you to very strict brand behavior. And those of us who still had good stock of the crystals would no longer be "permitted" to use the brand's name in our listings for sale.
Every bead shop and craft supply place and many, many small clothing makers--wedding shops, prom and dancing dress suppliers, the sort of salt of the Earth mom and pop time machines of shops that are the backbone of the field--scrambled to find something that could replace them. The last of the stock dwindled quickly, all of us grabbing what we could get while there was any chance of it, and then it was gone and we no longer had any access.
I was Big Pissed about it at the time. It was just so goddamn stuck-up, when wholesalers and indie jewelers had made them so much money, when some people I knew--when *I!*--had been brand-loyal for decades. But with no recourse, everyone pivoted fairly quickly, most of us to Preciosa Crystals. Those are Czech, quite sparkly, and considerably less expensive than Swarovski. The faceting method they use is different, but not worse; any differences are hardly noticeable when you're seeing them as a hundred pinpoints of light.
Well, out of nowhere, Swarovski just dropped this: https://www.harmanbeads.com/swarovski-brand-policy-update
"Effective June 1, 2026, Swarovski updated the distribution and brand usage policies introduced in 2021. Businesses may now purchase Swarovski Crystals without signing a Brand Control Agreement, and Authorized Distribution Partners may once again sell Swarovski Crystals to resellers, including bead stores and online retailers. Businesses may also use the Swarovski brand name when following Swarovskiβs Proper Use Guidelines. Designers, manufacturers, artists, brands, retailers, and resellers are now eligible to purchase Swarovski Crystals through authorized distribution channels."
They want us back. A lot of the companies who could have kept a brand relationship with them also have swapped to Preciosa, over the last half-decade, in solidarity with indie creators and out of a sour awareness that it could be them, next. And it doesn't hurt that Preciosa was able to expand their line quite a bit now that everyone who wanted sparkle had no choice but to go to them.
And I'm not seeing nearly anyone who intends to return. The feeling is, "Y'all told us to fuck off! Off we fucked! And now, that's what you can do, too!" I'm seeing a lot of "How many of us did you stab in the back?" comments from the people whose money they're hoping to attract.
And personally I'm sitting over here all rubby hands, mean snickering, because they really thought they were going to be able to outclimb the people who actually provided all their profits, and now here they are, hat in hand.
DISHONORED 2012γ»dev. Arkane Studios
human pov following objects π

Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
Free to watch β’ No registration required β’ HD streaming
So is there a school of soft knocks i can apply to, or
im sick of thinking of meals to make im just gonna go outside and eat dirt
which i would have to dig for. this world is a prison
Alright, you know what? Youβve just been Isekaiβd into the 5E D&D world! Spin this Wheel to find out your Class and, to make it more interesting, your Subclass!
How are you feeling?
HELL YEAH THIS IS THE BEST THING THAT EVER HAPPENED TO ME
This class is perfect for me! (complimentary)
This is pretty cool!
Not bad but⦠could better
Some parts of this are GREAT and some are TERRIBLE and it kinda evens out
I mean, Iβm pretty sure Iβm gonna die but at least Iβll be cool as hell
Well, Iβm gonna hate being this Class but at least Iβm gonna survive
I feel utterly indifferent about my Class
This class is perfect for me⦠(derogatory)
This isnβt good for me, butβ¦ could be worse
Yeah, this sucks
OH MY GOD THIS IS HORRIBLE I AM GONNA BE MISERABLE AND THAN IβLL DIE
Β Β Β Β Β Β Β Β Β Β Β Β Β Β Β Β Β Β Β Β Β Β Β Β Old Port District

Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
Free to watch β’ No registration required β’ HD streaming
if you were a weapon, (and you are one now. iβve made you into one just by reading this) what kind of weapon would you be?
i am no longer asking i need answers people. tell me what weapon your soul is forged into.
them. again. sigh.
the void diva
blood work? i sure hope it does
...for the Outsider himself has these five attributes by which he hopes to defeat the righteous:

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I mean itβs kinda the real life tragedy of love exaggerated, innit? Irl people die young or one person dies old and another person dies even older. At the end of it all someone gets left behind and has to learn how to move on after that. And for the one who dies you know youβre leaving them behind. You know youβre dooming them to moving on and if you believe in an afterlife god only knows how long youβll be waiting for them on the other side. The tragedy of the immortal loving the mortal takes those feelings we all know about and rips your heart out about it.
[ Image One: A screenshot of a tweet by @/thcscus that reads "mortal/immortal ships are so insane because what do you mean i'll love you for the rest of my life and you'll miss me for the rest of yours"
Image Two: A quote from Richard Siken's 'War of the Foxes' that reads "Someone has to leave first. This is a very old story. There is no other version of this story." / End ID ]
corvo: when i die, i want havelock, martin, and pendleton to lower me into my grave so they can let me down one last time