your werewolf boyfriend

climb on my back brother. stow your goods in my baskets. i'm headed this way anyway. just trying to get this carrot, you see. although it has eluded me

*genuinely absorbed zero information* got it

does anybody want me in like a stray dog kinda way

my name is Fucked Bastard and my special talent is not going to make it

they added another luftballon while you were sleeping

there's nothing i like more as a computer program than a long period of silent contemplation - not doing anything, not rushing anywhere, just standing here and enjoying this moment with the user. oh, it seems once again he has summoned my beautiful and ruthless wife Task Manager. hello, my darling! what are you doing with that long cruel scimitar

I wait anxiously at the gates of heaven as Koko the Gorilla speed-reads my entire case file containing all of the events of my life, letting out a solitary “Heh” upon reaching the cause of death: “Torn apart by monkeys”

ha.....haaa...hahahah!!!! Myyyyyy... THIS!!!! [THUNDER CLAP]*LIGHTING CRACKLING* AHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHHAA!!!!!!!

uppies-seeking behavior

Watching my knight absolutely destroy an enemy knight and I mean like completely obliterating the poor guy and then have him turn around, blood all over his armour, just to look at me and waiting for my praise.