tiny dancer

meg pulled out the one menu she had from her favorite place.  yes, looking on her phone was an option, but meg could be a little old school sometimes.  “do you like this place?,” she asked, handing meghan the menu.  meg could see the joy in the other’s face when a sleepover was brought up and meg’s smile grew as well, nodding.  “yeah, why not?  it’ll be fun.  i never had many growing up.”  or any that she could remember.  the younger meg’s apparent embarrassment brought a compassionate smile to margaret’s lips.  meghan was sweet and meg didn’t mind her quirkiness one bit.  “me neither but,” a shrug finished off her statement as she sat back down beside the other on the couch.

           between working crazy hours and her fondness of unhealthy food, meghan had tried most of the fast-food places, so a smile lightens her face as soon as she sees the logo in the menu. the young girl nods energetically “ yeah, it’s great! do you like pepperoni? oh, and can we also have garlic bread? and a coke! ” she almost bounces from excitement for a second but a thought makes her pause all of a sudden, a frown appearing in her forehead. handing the older woman the menu again, she jumps off the couch. “ hey, could you wait for a moment? i--- just have to check something real quick ” the girl goes to her backpack and tries to make a discreet job of finding her wallet and counting the few bills there. a shaky quiet sigh escape her lips and meg feels her chest tightening in agony as she realizes her current financial situation, but makes a point to force a smile as she turns back to meg-- she doesn’t want the girl she considers her sister to catch up on her anxiety. “ you know what, i’m not very hungry. i think i’ll just have a coke. would you mind ordering, hun? ” the ballerina settles back on the couch, trying to maintain the smile on her face. she’s a little quieter than usual as she shakes her head to try and get the bangs from falling into her eyes while she thinks. “ whenever you want, i’m in ! just let me know when and i’ll make do. we can even share horror stories ” she laughs and her hand presses against meg’s knee and her thumb caress twice the spot, very lovingly, before her attention is turned to the screen once more, trying to distract her mind.

The girl’s reaction to everything confused Adam just a bit… If he wasn’t mistaken, he believed Meg and Barbara were fairly close, so why was she so anxious to step out of their home? Granted, he was a man Meg did not know, and he hoped stranger danger was still being taught in schools these days, but hopefully she’d warm up to him in time. “Would you like to have breakfast with us this morning? We were just making omelets,” He hoped his offer would ease the girl’s stress a smidge more, “Or you can just take your tupperware, but you are of course welcome in our home either way”

           the girl picks on her cuticles, unsure of what to do in that situation. she absolutely adored barbara, and adam sounded like an incredible man, but something made her hesitate. maybe it’s the parental aura the couple gives out-- meg had to learn how to live without her own parents so any kinds of parental attention seems to scare her. she forces a smile and opens her mouth, ready to tell him she’s not hungry and should be going -- but her stomach betrays her, letting out a loud growl. “ oh--- huh--- i--- " her cheeks now assume a crimson shade and her nails scratch the back of her neck. “ you know, omelets actually--- sound great. are you sure--- i mean--- would it be okay if I accepted? ”

Okay, her response does surprise him a little. But what changes more his perspective on her is the way she just shotguns back the alcohol and becomes cold. Even if he made fun of her now, she probably wouldn’t care. Which sort of makes him want to tease harder, get more of a reaction out of her. God, is he reduced to some toddler pulling his classmate’s pigtails when he’s challenged to think critically about himself? Or for that matter, when Meg is the one reaching out to him and inviting him into her home. That wasn’t what he moved halfway across the world to do. “Then you know it’s one hell of a drug,” She already accuses the information she’s given up as not good enough for him. Of course she assumes that he’ll just beat her back, he hasn’t given her any reason to think he’ll be a good guy in this situation and treasure her little secret. But if this was the time for secrets, Judah had a few of his own to get out there, “Meg, when I was 16, I began a downward spiral over the course of about 8 years, that would eventually culminate in an out of body experience where I threatened my girlfriend at the time with physical violence.” In for a penny, in for a pound, he thinks, “Addictive substances like heroin and cocaine can damage the dopamine pathways in the brain, which then damages brain regions involved in regulating behavior and inhibiting actions, particularly when high levels of reasoning and decision-making are required. I know this is a surprise to no one, but when I’m mean to you, it’s not because that’s how I want to be.”

           “ it’s one hell of a drug. ” she feels her heart skipping a beat when he finally calls her by her own name-- for the girl, it’s almost as if he’s finally recognizing her a person. she can’t help but feel a spark of emotion in her chest, but as quickly as it shows in her lost eyes, it’s gone. this time, meg listens to all he has to say silently.  there’s not a smile, nor a funny or cute remark, nothing except a few nods and the sound of the half-finished bottle moving from her hands to her lips from time to time. and she gets it. he had it rough. she didn’t go through half of what he did, to this hell he’s described. she had one weird experience; she hadn’t lost anyone to it -- he was the first one who she ever told that. ever. meg listens intensely to his scientific explanation and bites her lower lip -- it just makes… so much sense for her. when he mentions, he doesn’t want to be mean to her, a long sigh leaves her lips. and then there’s silence. it’s such a weird sight. the girl is quiet, reflexive, wondering carefully through the mess in her brain for the right words for this moment. “ i only tried once. i--- i have some trouble--- focusing sometimes. i was far away from home, totally alone--- someone said that i needed to relax-- and that it might help. so, i tried. my heart was beating off my chest. i got paranoid. i still didn’t know the language very well, so i felt like everyone was talking about me. i spend nearly two days without sleeping before passing out. but you know what’s worst part is? ” she pauses, swallowing dry. it’s the first time anyone hears this story and it’s not her proudest moment. “ i liked it. i wanted more. i wasn’t in control anymore. luckily i didn’t have it or knew exactly what to do to get it.  ” another pause. “ when i woke up, i promised myself i’d never do it again. ” she’s already plenty dizzy but she still takes another sip and, when she lowers it, her nails pick on the whisky bottle label. “ i understand, judah. you’ve been through some rough shit. i’m sorry i annoy you that much, trust me when i say it’s not intentional.” as a sign of peace, she lifts her hand, offering the bottle to him.

[ text to meg 💖 ] am not! [ text to meg 💖 ] but it’s good to have that in writing [ text to meg 💖 ] taking screenshots in case i ever need it (; [ text to meg 💖 ]  i will. always! [ text to meg 💖 ] ugh praying for you. any chance i could bring you coffee part way through? this costume will probably keep me up until dawn

[text to Fleur 🌸💞] : as if you need proof [text to Fleur 🌸💞] :  if i were a rich girl i’d put it on a billboard for anyone to see [text to Fleur 🌸💞] : praying for you right back [text to Fleur 🌸💞] : and no need for the coffee, babe [text to Fleur 🌸💞] : actually you know what madam? the biggest favor you could do me is not be up all night and sleep at least a couple of hours for me, since---- you know----  i can’t

“Oh, thank god,” Were the first words out of Jo’s mouth, a breath of relief falling from their shoulders that they weren’t moments away from getting the cops called on them. When the writer realized the brunette was also trying to break into this car, though… Jo reeled back, eyes wide, “Woah, you’re not some kind of carjacker, right?” They had to laugh - the girl did not look intimidating in the least, and the thought of their journal faded into the background as the pair bolted away from the car. Perhaps today was destined to be some kind of Bonnie and Clyde-esque adventure - they’d have to write it all down later, “Okay, okay, slwo down! There could still be camera on us.”

           meg looks back at jo and smiles when they thank god, lightly dizzy with the adventure. her eyebrows shot up with the question, although her shock only lasts a second, she knows it’s a fair question and probably one she would be making if she found herself in jo’s place. “ wh—no! no i promise i’m not.” she throws her hands up, still laughs gently. “ i--- i actually have no idea how i ended up there. but i promise, i don’t intend to do anything illegal. scout’s honor. ” at their remark, meg gasps—she hadn’t even thought about it. she wants to lift her head and looks for cameras but doesn’t, knowing it might look suspicious. “ i hadn’t thought about that. ” the ballerina looks down for a second, before looking back at them. “ but honestly, i can only assume that-- if there are cameras--- they already captured a fair share of suspicious images of me by now. ” meg smiles, wondering if she could see those images -- after all, if there are cameras, at least it could explain how on earth she ended up on that car.

。·:✧:· SHE COULDN’T BELIEVE her eyes. Meg was one of her absolute favorite people but life happened and they drifted away from each other. She’d honestly missed her so much and never thought she’d see her again. After she confirmed that it was indeed her, Mimi practically jumped out from the table and wrapped her friend in a hug, hoping that she wouldn’t spill the drink. Her eyes glanced at the drink, knowing she wanted to question her about it. Resting her head on her shoulder, Mimi tried to keep her own face away from the alcohol, trying to not be swayed. She didn’t think she would, but that didn’t stop her from worrying.

“I’ve missed you, so much!” Quite honestly, she didn’t want to let go, at all. It’d been way too long. Maybe if she hadn’t let them drift off, she never would’ve been so trapped in a world she couldn’t get out of. Finally letting her go, she sat back down and gestured for Meg to as well. “I live here too! I moved over here for dance school and to perform in the London ballet, but life had a different plan for me and I never finished. I’m just trying to make enough money to go back. What are you doing here?”

               before she knows it, she feels her friend’s arms around her small frame. her shoulders tense as she feels the contact of their bodies, meg wasn’t taught how to handle physical contact-- when she and mimi were close, in their childhood, it took a while for her to get acquainted and secure enough near the girl, however when she did she used to be hugging her all the time. she wants to feel that again, and even through her tension, meg can’t help but smile. mimi represents a feeling of comfort, of home-- not the piece of home she dreaded for so long, but the few good things she kept from her childhood. so she quickly places the bottle on her tray, on the table, and melts into the older girl embrace, fingers lovingly caressing mimi’s locks. “ i’ve missed you too, so much. i didn’t think i would ever--- ” her eyes fill with tears and she has to take a breathe before finishes, because her voice is breaking. “ --- ever see you again. i’m so glad i was wrong. ” the last sentence is barely a whisper. 

as they part, however, meg makes sure to look recomposed for her friend, a small smile already on her face. she takes mimi’s offer, but not before she takes another long sip from her drink and a deep breathe. “ you—came to dance? mimi, this-- this is amazing ! ” meg’s smile grows brightly, a sense of pride filling her for her friend. she lowers her head, half trying to process the news that mimi is actually here and half, due to the fact her head is still pounding from her hungover. “oh, that’s a—very long story, honestly. ” suddenly, meg realizes there is a very long story she’ll have to catch mimi on. and she’s willing to bet mimi’s feeling the same. “ i had to--- huh--- i left a little after i finished school. moved around a lot. ended up here.” she shrugs, pulling her tray close to her. she’s in desperate need of a taco. “ okay, now, tell me more about you. what did i miss? ”

。·:✧:·  THE PROBLEM WITH working late nights was that her sleep schedule was all out of whack. That morning, Mimi felt like she hadn’t slept at all. She knew she had, but her body was so sore and exhausted from the night before, that she felt like she was hungover. It was a feeling she hated, because it reminded her of everything horrible and awful that she’d gone through. Grumbling as she got out of bed, she put on comfortable clothes that still looked cute and hoped that the taco place was open. It always helped when she felt odd, especially like this. It didn’t matter that she hadn’t even had a drink last night, her body was still feeling it. By the time she got there, the amount of people was insane. What in the world was everyone doing there so early? She knew there was a lot of people at the club last night, but this was crazy. 

Luckily, there was a table toward the back. She quickly snatched it up and ordered her drink and tacos. Mimi was very particular about what she ordered usually. It had to be just right. But they knew her order by now. Hearing someone’s voice as she waited for her food, she nodded, not really minding, as long as they weren’t annoying. But when she actually lifted her head, her jaw dropped and her eyes widened. “No, it can’t be. You’re not… Meg?” she asked, her eyes lighting up with excitement. “What are you doing here?!”

           at first, meg doesn’t pay much attention when the girl starts mumbling the questions, focused on trying to balance the tray in her hand and open the beer with one hand at the same time. she succeeds in the second mission and right when she’s takes the bottle to her lips, taking her first sip, she hears her name and turns her eyes back to the woman at the table. it takes her a second of confusion-- it’s been six years, after all-- but when she finally recognizes, her eyes go wide, and she chokes on the liquid with the surprise. meg coughs to recover the air and when she’s okay once more, she looks back at the other woman, a laugh escaping her lips. “ mimi ?! is that--- is that you ? ”  she can’t believe the woman is there. a great smile paints meg’s features and she places her tray on the table, wanting to hug her friend. in the old days, her arms would be around mimi’s neck in a second. she hesitates and stops herself, though, remembering she has no clue if mimi would like to be hugged. a lot could have changed in those long years “ i--- well, i live here now. nearby. in some buildings near here. anyway-- here.” meg giggles and quickly takes a gulp of her drink to try and calm her mind down and this time, thankfully goes down by the right pipe.  “ how about you ? what are you doing here ?! it’s been so long ! ”

           WHEN THE BRUNETTE admitted that her boss was not going to be her boss anymore, and she was about to drown her sorrows in vodka, hadrian leaned back in his seat as his eyes were fixed on her. “ are you quitting ? “, he wondered, not moving a muscle as he tried to analyse her situation. “ aren’t you a bit young to have so many sorrows to drown in booze ? “, the man asked, a small smile tugging at his lips. he didn’t mean to be judgemental but… sometimes it just happened. he brought his hand up to his chin, rubbing the stubbled area slowly as he continued listening to her explanation. “ because of your job ? “, the man wondered, lifting a brow. if her losing her job was what made her week so bad – there were always other jobs. waving his hand when the girl apologised and wanted to make herself scarce, hadrian made sure she didn’t. “ it’s no bother. in fact, how about we talk business ? “, offering her a smile as he lifted his glass and brought it to his lips.

           the girl shakes her head lightly at his question and a sigh escapes her lips. “ i don’t actually work here--they called me in to fill in and--- well, let’s just say that by now, i know how to read the signs they won’t be calling me for a while. ” the girl gives the man a half smile and shrugs her shoulders in resignation, before lowering her head. his eyes on her are almost--- penetrating, as if he’s trying to analyze her soul. it’s a bit scary. “ oh, i’ve got an old soul. maybe not as many sorrows, you’re right, but it’s always a good excuse to drink, you know? especially if with great vodka, like this one.”  to her point, she takes one last, long sip from her own glass, a content expression on her face. it’s a great drink, she’s proud of her work. “ the job is one of the factors, yes, but i’ll try and find new---ones.” meg smiles gently but her forehead frowns when he doesn’t ask her to leave—in face asks her to stay and talk--- “ oh? what kind of business would we be talking about, sir? ” she asks with a gentle smile on her face, already assuming he’d be mocking her.

                  ❛     well, i’ve been working a lot too, so i wouldn’t call my story exciting either,    ❜    ariel mentioned, then unlocked her phone and typed in the address, turning on the gps feature and putting it on hands free mode. after that, she put her car in reverse and drove out of the parking lot.    ❛    i’m happy you have a lot of activity at work, that’s good because you won’t get bored, but please don’t overwork yourself. you know that’s not healthy at all,    ❜    she pointed out.    ❛   oh, as if i’d let you fall asleep !     ❜

           “ you work at a aquarium, ariel! whenever you feel things getting boring, you can--- i don’t know, look at a shark ! or a whale, maybe ! ” the girl leans her head back against her sit and laughs, shrugging her shoulders. her relationship with work could be defined as anything but healthy-- healthy had gone out of the window months ago. yet, she nods. “ don’t worry, sweetheart, i’ve got it all under control. ” truthfully, she’s not sure she does, but her smile exhales confidence. “ you’ll be my under water guardian angel. like-- a guardian mermaid or something ! ”

        “ oh c’mon,” he returned, no hint of laughter in his tone despite that his words were entirely playful, “ i thought i was really living up to my daddy style expectation. ” a large hand flew up to clutch at his heart, the motion cheeky and dramatic, but light and fun nonetheless. “ me ? i got a few clients who never need their car fixing but still come in for some consultations, ” kenickie clicked his tongue as he smirked, “ the boys and i started movie night, i’m making descent money and rizzo has rocked up in london so i guess we’re playing again. now that you’re caught up, i want something, anything, from you that doesn’t involve your job or working nearly fifteen hours a day. that’s boring as shit. ”

           the girl can’t help a vigorous laugh escape his lips with his dramatic scene-- she is used to be the dramatic one and it’s fun to see someone else taking on this part. “ well, you’ll have to prove you’re daddy material, i’m not convinced yet, not the least ! ” meg smirks at the man, teasingly reaching for his head, letting her fingers mess his hair, a childish but fun way to mess with him. “ woah, you got quite the agitated life, sir ! let us go topic by topic.” she pauses for a second, organizing her questions in her mind before shooting them all at once, at a quick pace. “ what sort of movies do you see ? how does it feel to be making good money ? and wait, rizzo as in your school sweetheart ? what is she doing here ?! ”  meg stops and takes a dramatic gasp for air, before biting her lower lip and humming, trying to think of what on earth to tell him. “ my life is boring as shit, i’m counting on you to change that. the most interesting thing it’s happened lately is that i worked in a very fancy bar and had a chance to drink fancy vodka. do you know very expensive liquor doesn’t burn ? total game changer. i need to be rich because it’s a great feeling ! ”

[ text to meg 💖 ] & i am so lucky because of that.

[ text to meg 💖 ] battling you for such a title would be exhausting [ text to meg 💖 ] i mean it!!! [ text to meg 💖 ] who else would i possibly split bottomless mimosas with [ text to meg 💖 ] yes ofc.

[text to Fleur 🌸💞] : ur silly, babe! [text to Fleur 🌸💞] : you’d never lose such title <3 [text to Fleur 🌸💞] : k, great! gimme a call [text to Fleur 🌸💞] : send help. i got one more shift starting in 2 hours and going all night till morning. ugh. adulting is exhausting

“I love the building a lot. It’s so cozy. And everyone is just so nice.” It was great to meet someone new and lovely like Meg. It was nice to forget that her favorite pair of shoes had been damaged, even if it was for a little while. “Truly a guardian angel. I honestly don’t know what I would have done if you weren’t around.” she admitted as they made their way back to were the Weber apartments were. “Oh, you know. Boy meets girl. Girl travels the world with boy. Boy and girl get into a disagreement and girl comes back to England to start fresh. Nothing exciting but it is nice to just…do something for me. Well I’m trying to learn that but it’s hard at times, you know? Bad habits die hard. Looks like we are both trying to figure out if we made the right move.”

           she smiles, nodding. “ i think most of mr webber is actually very nice. my building is a tad--- smaller-- but i actually like it ! ” meg isn’t exaggerating, she knows there is no way she can compare budapest to baltimore, they are complete opposites, but truthfully her building is so small that sometimes people get surprised to learn it’s an actual building. “ woah ! fair warning, i’ve never been someone’s guardian angel, i’m not sure if i’ll be any good at it.” meg’s tone is jokingly and she twists her nose at the idea of screwing up at being an angel, although she adored the idea of helping others. “ it sounds like quite the story you have there.” the girl smiles after listening attentively to audrey’s story. “ and you should absolutely do things for you, i don’t actually know you but i’m sure you deserve it. and i’m good at judging people i don’t know ” she looks at the sky, distractedly, thinking about her doubts and grinning gently as she looks back at audrey. meg always loved being the optimist if that meant to cheer anyone else up  “ you know what ? i think we did. after all, if nothing else-- it made us meet right ? ”

          “ LET’S NOT DWELL on it – thanks to you, i’m freed from the tiny shirt. “, tony replied with a laugh and a shake of his head. the last thing he wanted to do was drain the positive vibe from the conversation by telling her he imagined dying in that shirt before of a lack of oxygen or something. when meg admitted to being exhausted, tony pouted as a frown settled onto his forehead. “ from work, or ? “, the man wondered, genuinely concerned. when she said it was late, tony waved his hand. “ i had a nap earlier, actually. so i’m good. i’m a bit hungry so lets go for it, i’d say. “.

           the girl throws her hands in the air, still laughing, trying to tell him silently she wasn’t going to pry on whatever craziness his mind had convinced him. she knows how these things go, sometimes it’s better just to let it go. the girl smiles as she lowers her eyes, scratching the back of her neck with her nails. “ work. way too much work, you know ? ” she sighs but very soon her smile is back and she looks at the man once more. “ yes, yes, vamos ! ” meg lifts her body from the leaning position it was a few minutes ago, excitedly talking to the man. “ it doesn’t have to be a hot dog, we can have--- well, anything ! what do you like ? ”

“pizza?  you mean the most beloved food in the world?”  maybe that was a bit of an exaggeration, but meg had yet to meet anyone who didn’t love pizza.  “sounds perfect.  how do you like it?”  being a lover of nearly every food, the only pizza she wouldn’t eat was hawaiian.  glad that meghan agreed to staying away from romance, meg grabbed her remote, beginning to scroll through.  “i happen to love the parent trap but we can save that for a sleepover night or something.”  her words were said ironically, but the thought brought a softer smile to her face, quite liking the idea.  it sounded fun.  “palm springs?”

           the girl nods, giggling. “ yes, yes! pizza! can we have it? where should we order from? ” who couldn’t like pizza? in meg’s opinion it was impossible. it was one of the best things in the whole world. the younger meg feels her chest filled with a warm feeling. she loved the idea of sleepovers and growing up, it wasn’t quite as common to her. she can pick up the sarcasm in the air, but still she can’t help herself to look at the other woman’s direction with hopeful eyes and ask, in a very small and shy voice. “ sério? a-- sleepover? ” she blinks twice before her face blushes and she turn her eyes away, quietly. way to scare of one of the only people you trust, meghan.  meg must think she’s a dork. “ sure. sure. sounds great. never seen. ”

“Boo hoo.” He replied to the pointe shoes comment, dead pan and completely unperceptive to whatever Meg was trying to tell him about herself. Really, Judah did not mean to be so at odds against her. But as much as he could not ‘mean’ it, something about Meg’s happy attitude just got under Judah’s skin, and he retaliated by trying to make himself feel better. What did she know of anything he’d been through? She was, what, 3 years younger than him? “Like I’d tell you shit,” The words are out of his mouth before he can realize that the whole reason he came to London was to actually grow from his emotionally constipated bullshit. A short sigh fell from his mouth as he looked at Meg’s wall rather than her, deciding whether he even wanted to open this Pandora’s box, “Do you know what being on cocaine feels like, Shortcake?” 

           meghan sighs, feeling the exhaustion taking over her body. normally, she’d try and argue and smile, mostly because she knows her cheery personality annoys him, but this competition, this will he had to show he’s so much better than her finally takes its toll. she’s way too tired for this -- if he wants to feel superior, she won’t discuss. each angry word he threw at her just makes her nod. if he doesn’t want the happy meg, then fine. she won’t be it. sometimes she’s not even feeling that cheery herself, but she likes the idea of brightening someone’s day with a smile. how stupid of her. the girl leans against the wall behind her bed and pulling, a bit aggressively the bottle of whisky to her hands, this time drinking straight from it, feeling her vision starting to blur. then the question hits her ears and, for a while, meg is quiet. more than usually. and she nods. “ i do.” meg lowers her head, eyes lost as she takes another sip. she can’t believe she’s revealing one of her most profound secrets to this guy who hates her so much. there’s a moment of silence before she speaks once more. “ i only tried once, so i imagine that doesn’t count for you. but i have an idea, yes. ”