♡

Your mom finding her friend at a store is like unskippable cutscenes

The fucking worst is that as I get older i completly understand the interest to catch up an unreasonable long time because turns out adults just dont get enough time to hang with friends, so catch up next to the Aldi cheese aisle it is

sorry for putting you in a glass jar with a twig and a leaf i thought you would like it

this next cup of coffee will fix me

im worse now

girl.. i saw you shrieking in the middle of the forest to summon terrifying creatures. can i get your number

“I think cats should serve on juries” is the natural extension of “I think dogs should vote” and I’m 100% behind this

This is the only football thing that matters

King