He/Him, neurodiverse. Writing. Gundam. Golden Sun. Hororr Games. Puzzle Games. Occasionally liveblogs. Non Omnis Moriar. Are We Cool Yet? Icon By @Kirtini
The Quest To Find Metroidvanias That Don’t Hate Me
(Masterlist)
I love metroidvanias but they don’t always get along with me, so I’ve been exploring as many as I can. I’ve been trying to document them here, because I’ve found some hidden gems.
I’ll put links to my reviews below the cut, as they come out:
I’m trying to be unbiased about my reviews so I’m not using letter or number grades here, and I’m also trying to think of a stand out high and low point of every game.
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nobody talks about how exhausting it is to live in that space between "things will get better" and "i can't handle this anymore." it's like your emotions are constantly swinging. leaving you both hopeful and defeated in the same day.
Fusion is a good game. I like that it gives Samus a slightly different set of abilities, and I like the stealth segments, and I like how the X feels like it’s atapting against you and hunting you most of the game, this is all very cool.
I hate Nightmare. I’ve tried this fight dozens of times, and I just can’t manage to get the timing right in the second phase, I cannot get a shot in without losing the rhythm of the space jump. Horrible boss design, I hate it, it ruins the whole game for me.
This game controls like a modern Castlevania title, and the art style is immediately stunning.
The enemy design is absolutely gruesome, I love it.
What’s not so stunning is how hard it is. You die in six hits to basically everything, and spikes and pits kill you instantly. It’s extremely unforgiving, and feels oppressive. Unfortunately, as a result it’s just not that fun.
Maybe that’s intentional but I’d prefer it was a little easier.
I had a few ideas for how to make it easier, so I might give it a second chance, and revisit this at some point, because I like the style a lot. If anyone else has any ideas to make it easier, I’m open to suggestions as well.
Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
✓ Live Streaming✓ Interactive Chat✓ Private Shows✓ HD Quality✓ Free Actions
Free to watch • No registration required • HD streaming
The Quest To Find Metroidvanias That Don’t Hate Me
(Masterlist)
I love metroidvanias but they don’t always get along with me, so I’ve been exploring as many as I can. I’ve been trying to document them here, because I’ve found some hidden gems.
I’ll put links to my reviews below the cut, as they come out:
I’m trying to be unbiased about my reviews so I’m not using letter or number grades here, and I’m also trying to think of a stand out high and low point of every game.
Most of the time, I can’t play these games on calls or while riding in a car, or something like that, because i want to experience the full game’s experience that it has to offer. I want the sound, i want the music, I want to pay attention.
Harmony of Dissonance. Is not like that. And it has not aged well at all.
To start, there’s the visuals. On the one hand, they were designed for the original gameboy, on a non-backlit screen, for everything to be readable that way. This, at least, is a cute artifact of how gaming has changed over the years. It doesn’t make it look any less like shit today, but it at least excuses it.
I can think of no such excuse for the music. You can argue it’s because of limited memory or computing power, but I know none of that is true. Circle of the Moon came out a year earlier and sounds better. Hell Megaman 4 came out 11 years earlier, and its musical composition still goes hard. So there’s no excuse as to why Harmony of Dissonance sounds bad.
The gameplay is pretty good, although I was looking up Juste’s abilities for this and for a big death battle tournament thing I’m running with some friends and I realized I don’t remember a damn thing about it even though I definitely beat it.
Okay, so the game looks bad, sounds bad, and plays unmemorably, but the story? Oh boy, the story????
It’s also mediocre.
Yeah, I dunno what to tell you, this was a low point in the franchise. I plan to revisit it as part of the Advance Collection, but oh boy is it not for people who aren’t invested in Castlevania as a franchise.
long answer: i get looooooooooooooooooooooooooonger
detailed answer: my body stores a number of how long i’m supposed to be and when i move, it checks how long i am, and then if i’m not as long as i’m supposed to be, i get longer by one instead of moving my whole body. When i eat a Red, it makes my body’s internal longness number go up.
is anyone else annoyed that "ai" encompasses both chatgpt and tools we train to do repetitive tedious work for us. and by the ripple effect of articles like "scientists develop ai to detect cancer early" that make people argue for the merit of chatgpt or become anti-medicine. and by the general state of the world and society
Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
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You’ve heard it before. You’ll hear it again. Ori is a great game. I started it a while ago but got distracted for a few years and had to restart it as part of this Quest.
Story-wise it’s heartfelt, it’s bittersweet. It’s a story rooted in loss, and sorrow, and hope.
Gameplay-wise, it’s a lot of tight platforming, and Ori’s movement is extremely smooth.
My one and only complaint is how much late-game relies on staying airborne 80% of the time, by jumping off of projectiles shot by enemies that have… Inconsistant targeting.
Ori is worth the hype, and is one of the highlights of The Quest To Find A Metroidvania That Doesn’t Hate Me.
Podcast Episode · Roll Me A Story · S2 E3 · 1h 31m
The third episode of RMAS: the Stars Aflame is out!
Vual is still searching for new crew members, and he comes across another set of interesting characters, including a gremlin fae child, a religious merchant, a mage, and not one but two particularly spooky beings that should, by all rights, not be on this plane of existence (but he tries his best not to cause problems with them anyways because maybe they’re friendly? He’s still very new at this).
I liked what this game was going for, managing resources, and a spin on Prime 1 with new gameplay implementations.
But… I really hate Spider Guardian. I gave it a handful of attempts, and I could probably push past it now, now that I’ve played much, much worse games. But when I played this the first time, the runback combined with how annoying it was made me rage quit.
I’m at the point where I could give it another go, but dusting off the gamecube is inconvenient, buying the trilogy is expensive, and emulating makes this game 40x worse.
If I do that, you’ll be the first to find out though.
Many interesting Metroidvanias bring something new to the table. In Laika’s case, it’s being on a motorcycle the whole time.
I think that the fact that this game pushes too far into the Trials: Evolution style movement holds it back though. Past a certain point, basic navigation is really annoying. And that’s something I don’t really want in a Metroidvania.
Maybe if you’re really good at these sorts of bike games it would be really good, but it’s just annoying to me.
Circle of the Moon is a bit different from what I’m used to for Castlevanias. It’s quite a bit harder, given the sparcity of save points, and general lack of healing items.
Back when I played it, I was emulating it, and I abused Turbo and save states a lot.
Still, it has a lot of charm to it. The DSS is fun to play with, the bosses are fun and memorable, especially Aldramelech and the Zombie Dragon.
I did get hung up on the final boss, and put it away, but I’ll come back to it now that I have the Advance Collection.
Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
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im currently completely losing it about the great stalacpipe organ. are you fucking kidding me they made an organ out of a CAVE???? IT TAKES UP THREE ACRES??? i legit am about to lose it
this is a comment left on a recording of moonlight sonata played on an organ that is literally made out of a cave and its making me so emotional its not even funny
[image id: a youtube comment that reads ‘wonderful…and the moon has never shone there…’ end id.]
According to Wikipedia, it works by hidden rubber mallets on the naturally-musical stalactites that tourguides have been knocking on for over a century. The guy who made the organ may have gotten the idea when his son whacked his head on a stalactite.