A Library Of Chaos

She almost got a car seat too but I stopped her. The prices didn’t look that great and I want to do more research.

Not buying anything today bc it’s before the NT scan and honestly don’t want to buy big things until after anatomy scan either. Might buy books and smaller things after NT scan.

It’s also because I need to do another big clear out of my apartment. Last year I did do a pretty good job, but I’m realizing I kept things I’ve never reached for, clothes I thought would fit pregnant and didn’t, and clothes I just don’t wear anymore. Plus just… things. Am also rearranging furniture and changing out my bed to make room for baby things. So that needs to be done before I add stuff.

Buttt idk how much my pelvis will manage tbh. There is a ledge I can sit on to greet the students, but the parking duty…

Then she’s huffy about midwife appointments. And she’s annoyed about having to cover for me because people ask about me a lot… and like?? Yeah that happens when it’s understaffed. She laughed when I said another school of a smaller size has 3 librarians.

And when I asked what she thought about not doing the reading breakfast tomorrow because the school that primarily attends is away, just to bounce ideas, she did the ”I’m not going to say you shouldn’t do it” which is a form of communication I HATE. Just say that you think I should do it.

But she said she wanted me to apply for this pregnancy leave that can be done if you do particularly strenuous or dangerous work. And I know I don’t qualify. She just wants to get my substitute in and not deal with me being pregnant. But that has a negative economic impact on me! To me it just feels like she doesn’t want to deal with my appointments.

Waiting until next week so I can wheel around my chair and shelve books and move books around. Right now books at me knees or lower cannot be accessed unless I sit down

Lower blood pressure is delightful. Especially when they’re STILL insisting that my well within normal diastolic pressure is a “risk” for high blood pressure

Blocked so many people now. Disgusting dehumanizing weirdos. Fuck off

I’ve personally decided against NIPT because I wanted my results given to me by a professional and not find out on my own. But, I also know that high risk ≠ definite.