Chalicothere

So, a good friend is from Värmland, Sweden, and she took me there for the first time this holiday season.  Here are some funfacts about Värmland!!!:

The original arms had a wolverine.  Freakin’ cool.  Now it’s an eagle though.  Eh.

It contains much of Sweden’s largest lake, Vänern.

Värmland means ‘Warm Land’ - possibly.

Snorri Sturlasson, the awesome Icelandic man himself, wrote many a story about Värmland.

Värmland’s first (granted) ‘city’ was Kristinehamn.

There are some awesome-sounding districts in Värmland: Grums, Kil (pronounced ‘Sheel’), Visnums, Fryksdal, and more.

Finally, all these people are from there, and they’re all awesome individually: John Ericsson (from the last post), Tage Erlander, Nils Ferlin, and Bengt-Åke Gustafsson, who I like because of his name but others like because of hockey.

And last, on a personal note, one of my favorite statues I’ve seen is in Karlstad, Sweden.  It commemorates the 50th anniversary of the dissolution of Sweden & Norway (of 1905).  Thus, it’s modern (1955), but it’s freakin’ awesome.

Check it:

Merrimack vs. Monitor.

I know nothing about this, so I’ll have to research it.  But the Monitor was built by John Ericsson.  It was for the Union and it was the first Ironclad ship used.

FREAKIN’ COOL.  I’ll get you more information soon.

Oh, John Ericsson was from Filipstad, Sweden.  That’s why I learned this.  So on the 24th I was there.  Now I’m on the train from Göteborg to Malmö.  That’s why it’s freakin’ cool.  I got so excited I jumped ahead of myself.  OJ OJ OJ!

Ten Things You Didn't Know about the Vagina.  I've head differently on the nerve-endings, both for Vagina and Penis, but whatevs.  Comin' at ya from New Orleans, Louisiana.

Haha.  I wrote 'I've head' but I meant 'I've heard.'  Hood one me.

Ah!  I did it again!  Good one me!

Anthem of the Åland Islands

A while ago I decided to see what love.com was.  It forwarded to aol.com.  And thus began my hysterically excitingly wonderfully mundane life-search for  awesome domain forwarding.  Here's what I've personally found so far:

love.com -> aol.com

happy.com -> walgreens.com

rugby.com -> ralphlauren.com

eat.com -> hellmanns.com

Those are the most generic ones I've found (and trust me, I've had to search a lot.  Most of the times the domains are just parked (eg. cool.com & sad.com).  However, besides love.com -> aol.com, my proudest discovery is:

lemondrop.com -> huffingtonpost.com/women

I have no idea why I thought of lemondrop, but what an amazing domain forwarding.  Oh, I remember why, but I'll keep it secret - FOR NOW!

Also, I found this interesting: 

dog.com, bird.com, and horse.com all look as if they're owned by the same company that just links to dog, bird, and horse-food, respectively.  However, cat.com is owned by Caterpillar Worldwide (the construction machine company).  

And:

there's an interesting difference between men- and women-oriented basic word domains.

man.com is a management asset company.

men.com is a porn site.

woman.com is generically owned (and says "Your source for all things woman.")

women.com is a social network site.

Overall, it seems to me that domains that are male-word-oriented are generally gay porn and ones that are female-word-oriented are either generic or about women's issues (and much more pertinent to the domain name).

Anyway, that's my fun fact of the day!  I've been storing them up, but I found lemondrop.com this very morning and I couldn't hold back anymore.

Holler!

(Written from Malmo, Sweden at 10:30...  Trelleborgsgatan 17!)

I really like Martin Van Buren.  Mostly because he was President of the US but English was not his first language.  

BUUUT, he was the first US-borne President (as in, after the Revolution).  Whoa.  Blow your mind yet?  IF not, continue.  OR GET YO MIND CHECKED...

Obviously he had a great hairstyle.  Also, my brother gave me a lithograph from the 1800s of Van Buren.  Which is kewl.

Anyway, quick funfact rundown:

1 - 8th President of the US.

2 - Born in New York State.

3 - The development and popularization of the phrase 'OK' - which should have it's own entry - is sometimes credited to Van Buren because he was from Kinderhook, New York, and political groups formed using the phrase 'Old Kinderhook' to support him.

4 - HILARIOUSLY - On 'whitehouse.gov' - this is the first sentence about Van Buren: "Only about 5 feet, 6 inches tall, but trim and erect, Martin Van Buren dressed fastidiously."

Obviously - he's not really known for doing too much awesome 'Presidential Shit'.  Even the White House knows that.  But - lest they insult one of their own - they wanted you to know that Van Buren HAD STYLE!

5 - He was against Texas joining the US - on some good grounds: he didn't want to expand slavery and Texas would do that to a great area, and he didn't want to go to war with Mexico.

Hey, number 5 right there is pretty presidential.  But I guess he didn't do much with he - he just said he was against it.  Hmmm...

6 - Finally, his nickname was "The Little Magician."  I assume 'little' because he was little.  And I looked up 'magician' but it relates to something called the 'Spoils system' which isn't that interesting - basically it's just a style of (shitty) government (that still commonly exists) where the ruling party gives jobs to its supporters and such...  (HALLIBURTON ANYBODY???)

7 - I don't like the number 6, I like 7 or 8.  So let me go find one more fun fact.  UGH.  BRAIN - GET IT OUT...  I can only think of 'Martin van Buren is not related to the Dutch Techno Artist Armin Van Buuren.'  I'm actually not sure that's true though.  Oh.  Check this one: Buren (where his family is from) is a county in the Netherlands.  

It'd be like if 'Lechowick' were a place and that's where my family were from.  It's not, and they're not.  But heck - I guess the only thing that Martin and I have in common is our love of his facial hair.

Ratatoskr was the squirrel who lived on Yggdrasil, the gigantic tree that connects worlds within Nordic mythology.  Ratatoskr's job was to run back and forth between the dragon, Nidhogg, at the bottom of the tree to the eagle at the top.  The eagle doesn't traditionally have a name (though I did find the name Hraesvelg associated him - but that's probably a different eagle), but he did have a hawk sitting on his face - specifically between his eyes.  The hawk's name was Vedrfolnir.  (I've also found one source that calls Vedrfolnir a rooster, but I'll stick with hawk for now.)

Oh, for records, I'm in Oxnard, California and it's 4 November, 2014.  Voting day!

So, Ratatoskr is basically a gossip-monger.  He carries insults between the dragon and the eagle, which is hilarious, and he continues to stoke the embers of their fiery feud.  Why?  Not quite sure right now, but I bet I'll learn after I post this.

Ratatoskr looks etymologically like 'Rat-tusk' which is one theory as to his name (and also a very simple and good name for a squirrel).  But other ideas are that 'Rata' could mean chewer/gnawer/driller, and toskr still meaning tusk or tooth.  Which is also fine and good for a squirrel.

The one other thing that interested me was - oh wait - quickly:  Nidhogg is a 'wyrm' which obviously looks like worm, but actually means dragon or snake.  Please do remember the 'firewyrm' from The 13th Warrior.

Anyway, the one other thing is that the eagle doesn't have a name, which I think is weird.  Plus the fact that the face-sitting hawk does have a name and seems to be more important than the eagle.  So why is the hawk on the eagle's face?  Or really, what role does the eagle play?

It seems like the hawk might represent a higher form of wisdom (like the third-eye in eastern religions), or it might be a knowledge-getter, like Odin's ravens which go out, collect wisdom, and bring it back to Odin.  Seems like no one is too sure.  And if the eagle's only definitive description is that he likes to insult the dragon Nidhogg, then obviously he's kind of a dick.  Of course, Nidhogg is also chewing on the roots and insulting the eagle right back - but at least he has a name.

'New Work to Rick' means its a new word I've learned and love.  'New rickword' means its a word I'm aware isn't a recognized word but I either made it up or I think it should be...  (eg. Cornwastic - someone who embodies the essense of being from Cornwall, UK.  And it's a portmanteau of 'Cornwall' and 'Fantastic', not 'Cornwall' and 'Spastic' which I see it might look like.  Cornwallian is another version of it.)

Hypercarnivore is an animal whose diet consists of 70% or more animal meat.  This includes big cats, sharks, and dolphins, eagles, snakes, and marlin.

I've decided to write down all the fun facts I gather.  Today is Wednesday, the 8th of October, 2014.  I'm in Brooklyn, New York.

What inspired me you say?  The Mantis Shrimp.  And my friend, Marcus, who told me I should make a Rick-scrapbook.  Well, until that book is started, I'm going to have to store my brain-scraps here.

Tell me that each one of these fun facts individually doesn't blow your mind.  And put together, blows your mind so many times it reforms:

1 - Mantis Shrimp fall under one of two types: Spearers and Smashers.  Spearers sound way more interesting because Smashers sound caveman-like.  BUUUUTTT....

2 - Smashers use their club-hands with SUUUCH amazingness that they:

2A - ...knock their prey unconscious or dead because their hits have the same gravitational force of a 22 caliber pistol slug.

2B - ...create a vacuum from the 'punch' that produces a shockwave powerful enough to knock their prey unconscious or dead even if their initial 'punch' misses.

2C - ...form that same vacuum that is so amazingly god-like, it creates both heat and light.  WHAAAA????

2Ci - There is a word for this: sonoluminescence. Which is obviously pretty straight forward etymologically.

3 - Back to all Mantis Shrimp (not just the Smashers - which is totally scientific-sounding).  This fact is kind of hard to understand - but even more mind-blowing even if not creation-of-light-and-heat-related.  Humans have 3 photoreceptors (blue, green and red.)  Dogs have 2 (blue and green).  A lot of birds have 4 (blue, green, red, and ultraviolet).  Mantis Shrimp have 16.  What?  16.  This includes the four previously mentioned, as well as polarized light.  Plus, they see lightwaves that are not only linear (which is what we see) but circular as well (which is how the number goes up to 16).  And each 'eyeball' actually has three 'pupils' on it which move in bands, with the center band having the most acute visual ability.  This also means that with one eye closed, they still have trinocular vision (as opposed to binocular, which is what we humans have).  As far as humans know, the Mantis Shrimp has the best vision of any animal on Earth.  But we don't know WHY they do.  Amazing.

4 - This is the least physical - but also kind of the most - if you get go back and read this one again after you're done.  Some Mantis Shrimp are monogamous.  MONOGAMOUS SHRIMP.  And they can live together for up to 20 years.  The average length of a marriage in couples that divorce in the US is 8 years.  (Weird comparison, but I don't know the average length of marriage overall.)  BUT ISN'T THAT CRAAAAZY???

5 - Yes, it continues.  This one will seem obvious, but it wouldn't really pop up in your head without direct mention.  Mantis Shrimp can be hard to keep in aquaria because they can LITERALLY BREAK OUT.  Well, only the 'Smashers' can.  The Spearers can't do jackshit in this regard. 5A - Aquaria and aquariums are both valid plurals for 'aquarium.'

6 - Finally, if a Smasher wants to make its home in some rock or some coral, it simply punches its way into forming itself a cave/home.  Maybe you don't think this is a fun fact - but think about it.  It actually punch-builds itself a house.

A (Smasher) Mantis Shrimp:

Those two little balls are the Smasher's 'smash-balls' - which have a technical term, but about which I don't care.

Did these facts blow your mind over and over?  Find some videos online, because I saw one where the Smasher hit a giant-ass lobster-thing in the arm.  Did the lobster-thing die?  No.  Did his arm fly off?  Yes.  Did the lobster-thing then pick up his own arm and give it to the Smasher as bait so it could escape?  Yes.  And because i'd rather end on 7 or 8 than 6, let me add this unrelated fact:

7 - 'Chalicothere' is Greek for 'Gravel Beast'.