I got me an evil eye. Siiiigh.
I knew I felt watched but not in an entity sort of way.
My constant ābeing chasedā dreams stopped ages ago since I set up a guardian over my bed and started sleeping with selenite, but I still felt something.
Something blocking my confidence and turning positively intentioned spellwork into disruptive results. (Legit, I would cast good energy over someone and then theyād have a shitty day! I stopped trying to interfere with peopleās days even positively for that reason! Now I just petition higher beings and keep my own magic out of it.)
I honestly suspected a curse for a while, but no divination I did turned up positive on a potential curse. Blocked chakras maybe. Did tons of meditation and worked with crystals and intentions. Nope⦠maybe an attachment? Still no!
I figured it out today with an oil drop test.
My lack of faith in my own results and persistent internal self flagellation (born of trauma yayyy) created a nagging self-inflicted evil eye. I protect myself from outside influence like a steel wall, but I never thought to ward against my own accumulated negative energy.
So now Iām working on challenging and shifting my negative self talk as soon as I notice it happening, and on top of that I will be washing my body multiple days in a row head to toe with salt, palo santo ash, coconut oil, and black pepper. Iāve also created a charm bracelet for my left hand including a permanent evil eye ward encased in resin (bay leaf, black pepper), obsidian, and my protection spell jar.
Time to embody the Magician.
(I realize there are established doctrines and traditions across many faiths dictating how to deal with an evil eye affliction, but Iām on a personal journey that Iām informing with established knowledge and intuiting into my own practice.
To me, itās intention, attention, and focus that matters most. Whatever materials and rituals you use amplify your innate magic, but ultimately I donāt think what they are matters as much as how you use them in concert with your spirit.
Though there ARE some lower vibrational materials out there that I avoid because they feel aversive to me. Blood, sulfur, sacrificed animals, human bits, waste, etc. If you use these, please donāt take my aversion as an attack; although I advocate for shadow work, I work best with gray and light energy, and avoid dark magic unless absolutely necessary ā As in the case of existential threats to humanity such as data centers or the US administration. )
Psychologically, Iām already feeling way better! That āwatchedā feeling is fizzling away and my ruminations are less automatic.
Anyways I guess the moral of the story here is:
We are all powerful. We just have to believe it and align our energies in that direction. Anything less risks serious self-restriction and falling into a spiral thatās hard to climb out of. Believe in yourself, your abilities, and what you deserve.
Say hello to Wigglez. Heās my dream guardian! (Chosen for his big ole eyes and spooky factor).
Repurposed some charms from my general protection charm necklace into a more specifically intentioned bracelet for my left hand. The resin charm is the evil eye ward.
Permanent witches knot charm on the end of my selenite wand necklace made of hemp and salt in resin. (And glitter).
This got longer than expected⦠:)