Ben nodded in response to the other's confirmation. "You know, that's a very common thing. I think I might have an iron stomach, because I can drink a few cups a day and feel fine. As long as I don't do it too late at night, then I'm tired, but jittery," he mused, deciding to accept the free coffee and pull it closer. He needed all the caffeine he could get that morning anyway. "Hazelnut's not bad to me, either, so... thanks!"
Ben realized that he could've had a little more tact asking about the younger man's face. In fact, he knew better than to ask the way he had, but he still had his flaws as a person, especially when he was still in the throes of sleep inertia and wasn't fully awake yet. "My apologies, I should probably mind my own business," he offered with an apologetic smile. "I don't always blurt out what's on my mind at breakfast. Are you okay, though?" he asked, the question being more sincerely asked this time.
Lixin thought it would be a nice thing to have a stronger constitution. There was something poetic about the imagery of a person drinking multiple coffees a day, especially an artist. It was the sort of thing novelists put together when telling a good story. It was also the sort of thing he really strove toward. The illusion of being cool or enigmatic, even though he was too aware of how paper thin that persona was and how different the boy beneath it all really was. Even something as simple as being unable to handle excess caffeine felt like a new brand of failure. "You're very welcome," He said with a smile. "Do you usually drink a few cups a day then?"
It was difficult not to wince, openly cringing as he thought about how bad he must look to warrant that much concern. It wasn't like he had worn enough makeup that he should have panda eyes or anything of that nature. Was he unclean? Briefly, he considered his options and wondered if he should excuse himself to lean up. "I'm okay, just you know... hungover. Uh, you're fine. I must look real bad though, huh?"" He mumbled, his posture turning self conscious, shoulders hunching forward. "Good you told me, I should probably clean up before visiting my parents.""
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It seemed my whole life was composed of these disjointed fractions of time, hanging around in one public place and then another, as if I were waiting for trains that never came. And, like
one of those ghosts who are said to linger around depots late at night, asking passersby for the timetable of the Midnight Express that derailed twenty years before, I wandered from light to light until that dreaded hour when all the doors closed and, stepping from the world of warmth and people and conversation overheard, I felt
the old familiar cold twist through my bones again and then it was all forgotten, the warmth, the lights; I had never been warm in my life, ever. - Donna Tartt.
Name: Leith Ladlow
Nickname(s): Luran (back home).
Age: 32.
Birthday: 31/10, 2am, 1957
Zodiac: Scorpio (Sun), Aquarius (Moon) Virgo (Rising)
FC: Freddie Fox
Birthplace: Edinburgh, Scotland
Gender: Cisgender male
Pronouns: He/Him
Sexuality: Bisexual
Height: 1.78m
Scars/piercings/tattoos: No tattoos or piercings, has a scar across his cheek but it is more or less faded because of how old it is. Also has scars on his back.
Vices: Cigarettes, alcohol.
Virtues: Intelligent, hardworking, honest.
Blood type: AB
Occupation: Works at A New Chapter.
Family
Leith was born into a humble, working class family. His parents were both young, his mother only eighteen years old when she gave birth to him. His father was not in the picture at the start as his family didn't want him to lose his future over a bad decision, and so he left for University
This didn't really affect Leith in his early years, all too happy to be raised by his grandparents and his mother. Everything started going south when he turned five, however, as his mother unexpectedly fell ill.
After a few years battling with her illness, she succumbed to it when Leith was eight years old.
Unable to care for him on their own, despite their best efforts, Leith was placed with a foster home. His grandmother still kept in touch.
When his father returned from University, he also tried being a part of Leith's life to an extent, but never took full responsibility of him.
After his grandparents passed, (his grandfather when he was in his mid-teens and his grandmother when he was in his 20s) he lost any interest in remaining home, feeling like he had no roots left in Scotland.
Education
Despite being brilliant, according to all his professors, it was very clear that Leith did not want to apply himself unless he was interested in the subject at hand.
He excelled in the humanities as well as literature, but was more or less average in the sciences.
Growing up, he was an avid reader and writer, often spending the end of every day constructing alternate realities through pen and paper as a form of escapism.
Poetry was also an area of interest for him academically.
His favourite areas of literature are gothic literature, romanticism and epic poetry.
After graduating school, he pursued a BA in English Language and Literature at Oxford.
Relationships
TBA after plotting
Personality
Comes across standoffish when people first meet him, with an aloof/guarded demeanor.
Witty, enjoys good banter but tends to not engage in it with people he hardly knows.
Can also be rather sarcastic
His unfriendliness comes from the fact he was withdrawn ever since he was a kid, more into spending time with his nose in a book than with other people.
Observant, constantly learning about the world and admiring its beauty while being acutely aware of its horrors.
Has a pretty dark/morbid sense of humours at time.
Very intellectual, happy to indulge in highly theoretical conversations about philosophy, literature, ideas and themes.
Despite being quiet and guarded, he is very expressive once he is comfortable and articulate in how he puts his thoughts together.
A romantic at heart.
Can get bored by idle chatter and seeks to disengage from it when he finds himself trapped in it.
Very matter-of-fact and straight to the point.
Adventurous, which is what brought him to America in the first place. He thought he would be able to do the On the Road thing but fast realised it is far less practical and more expensive than he realised.
Teases people when he likes them, is overly polite when he is indifferent or not a fan of them.
Misc.
Fluent in Latin, Scottish Gaelic and Russian.
Has always dreamed of being a writer.
Writes poetry when he's bored.
Really into art but cannot draw for the life of him.
Likes old buildings.
Loves horses
Has a pet cat that is his entire life (Scottish fold mix)
His name is Beowulf (poor cat)
Speaks in a more-or-less understandable Scottish accent, as he got used to having to tone it down while studying in England.
Has never been in love.
Wanted Connections
Really non-serious mall crush; probably someone Leith admires from afar because he is decidedly not a 'talking-to-people' type of guy
Friends? Would be nice
Neighbour(s)
Will think of more interesting things in the future
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It wasn't so much that Mingyu hated having a job at the cafe - after all, most customers were friendly people who were down for a chat, satisfying his endless need for human interaction. No, the part that he hated, was actually having to do work in between the chatting with people. Regardless, he preferred his job at The Black Sparrow a million times over the one at Starstrike and tried to use this knowledge in the back of his mind to keep him positive, even if people weren't in the mood to talk as much. Which seemed to be the case today.
He had been trying to hide his annoyance with the lack of response from most people he tried to start a conversation with. That was, until a familiar voice spoke up and had him spin around to find Lixin. Shit, he hadn't even see them come in. Did that make him bad at his job or just a bad roommate? Not that he felt any particularly strong loyalty to Duckie to the point where he needed to be nice to everyone he knew, but he at least felt the need to be respectful towards his brothers, even if they had hardly interacted.
Truth was that Mingyu had never actually seen Lixin until he had started showing up to the apartment that he shared with Duckie. With his lack of knowledge on the other's family, he had found it weird at first that his brothers hadn't really shown their faces before the attack and Mingyu had admittedly judged them for it for a little while. But he also knew Duk-soo and his tendencies to push people away when things got too personal and so he had slowly realized that perhaps there had been a mutual understanding between all siblings to let each other exist in their own personal space - especially when it came to Duckie. Mingyu knew from personal experience that trying to coddle his roommate only gave the opposite results. Of course, this was also while being unaware that Duckie was actually taking things very easy on him.
"Lixin," He greeted with a small bow. "I actually work here." A soft chuckle escaped him as he pointed to the name tag pinned to his shirt, though he hadn't exactly made it possible for the other to see it in the first place. Nevertheless, he did find himself sitting down on the opposite side of the table, an uncharacteristic frown pulling at his brows as his gaze inspected Lixin's face. Should he ask or assume that the entirety of Duckie's family hated to talk about personal things? "Do you want some ice for that? I can get some in the back." He then offered with a careful smile as he gestured vaguely at the other's face.
Open confusion settled on his features when he was addressed by name, his government name, which only his family really used, and even then it was often 'Xin'. Inclining his head to look at the person properly, it took a moment before the pieces came together. Right, that was Duckie's roommate...M...M? 'Minji? Min... No that's definitely not it.' "Hey," He greeted with a smile, the confusion washing off his features. "You. How are you uh, doing...pal?"
Names were not exactly Lux's forte, and even if they had been, he was hardly comfortable enough to constantly be in Duckie's space, hovering over him like a mother goose. So, he had not crossed paths with his roommate enough to commit the name to memory. Sue him.
The offer for ice struck them as odd, their gaze lowering to their coffee. Was it odd to order hot coffee in June? It had started to become warmer, certainly, but the brunet had always been particularly sensitive to the cold, feeling cold rather easily, and there was nothing nicer than a hot coffee in the morning. It made them feel like their insides were being toasted. Like a marshmallow. "I mean I... if I wanted an iced coffee, I would have ordered..." Their gaze fell on their other coffee they had erroneously ordered, puffing out their cheeks. "Okay, I know I ordered the wrong drink the first time, but this time, I did get the one I wanted, I promise." They reached up to flick their hair out of their face, fingers brushing over the inflamed skin, leaving a stinging sensation in their wake. "Ow, what?"
Ocean was having a little bit of a rough day. Last night, Ocean had indulged a little - not alcohol, he didn't drink, but he'd actually let himself eat pizza, and not just one piece either. Generally he wouldn't have even considered it, but he'd had such a good day. He was getting the hang of things at Art Murmur, and he hadn't thought about Grant once the entire day (well until he realized he hadn't thought about him, but that was just a brief moment, and that was better than most days, so he'd take it), and when some of his coworkers had invited him to get pizza after work, he'd said yes, so pleased to have even been invited. But...in the light of a new day, Ocean had stood in front of the mirror, shirtless and picking apart every little perceived imperfection, and he knew he needed to go on a long run to make up for the high caloric (and fat) intake of the previous night. And it had definitely been a long one too, so by the time Ocean had gotten to The Blue Sparrow, he was exhausted.
So now he was sitting at a table inside, hoping he didn't look like a sweaty mess (but knowing that he did). Really he'd just been catching his breath, so Ocean was surprised when someone spoke, sliding a coffee down to him. "Oh, that's okay," Ocean said. "You should keep it. I really only stopped in here to sit down for a minute." He needed to continue his run and head back to the commune eventually. But Ocean didn't want to be rude, so he took the cup, looking at the name written on the side of it. Unfortunately he couldn't read what it said, and he laughed, "Are you even sure this is yours? The writing is totally indecipherable." And then he looked back at the other, introducing himself, "My name is Ocean." And it was like he suddenly realized the state the other's face was in. "Are you okay?" he asked. It looked like someone had punched him, though Ocean didn't want to ask that directly. Instead he moved over so that he was sitting closer to the other, saying, "That looks like it hurts."
Lux was a little disappointed when his attempt to get rid of one of his two coffees failed, but he didn't let it show on his face, nodding and sliding it back towards himself instead. Absently he wondered if Hoseok were even awake to dump this on him instead. "Uh, yeah, it's mine. I guess some of the baristas have bad handwriting, I don't know. I like, ordered the wrong thing the first time and then realised and ordered something else. It wasn't their mistake so I just...got both."
He reached up to rub the back of his neck awkwardly, unsure 'what' looked like it hurt. Was it his tattoos? There were plenty all over their skin, creeping up their neck from the collar of their shirt, so it was entirely plausible. "I mean, some of them hurt like a bitch, but for the most part, it's kind of a good pain. You get numb to it after a while, and it starts to feel... good almost? I don't know. It depends on a lot of stuff, too, like how long the session is, how many colours... how close to the bone. You know?"
It had been one of those mornings that had been an absolute struggle for Ben to drag himself out of bed. Maybe he'd had a little more to drink than he should've the night before. At the time, it had felt like a good idea, but now he was really feeling the tiredness that tugged at his bones. At first, he didn't realize the cup had been set down for him until he heard someone talking and heard the words 'free coffee'. He glanced up as if trying to piece together what he missed, and caught sight of the younger man with bruises around his eye.
"Free coffee... are you sure?" he asked, making sure he'd heard at least that part correctly as he reached for the cup. "What's wrong with this one?" he asked. He had his own half-finished cup with a breakfast he'd started picking at. Dr. Park would've been comfortably tucked into bed still if he didn't have to come to work. He definitely needed to wake up if he was going to face appointment after appointment of other people's problems. "Is your face okay?" he blurted out, not having the time to maybe think about easing into the question before it just came out.
After he had said it, it dawned on him how suspect offering a stranger free coffee could sound. An itch of anxiety overcame him, but he was careful not to let it show on his face. "Mhm," He nodded in confirmation, lowering his mug before wiping away the foam that had caught on his upper lip. "I don't think I can have two cups off coffee. Or, I mean, I could, but I don't think it'll be too pleasant. I'm pretty sensitive to caffeine. One cup is all I need."
His nose scrunched up. "Nothing's...wrong with it. It's just... it's hazelnut flavoured and I wanted caramel, but my brain wasn't really working so I said hazelnut, but I meant I wanted caramel and I didn't really realise until after, you know?"
The question about his face took him aback, a flush settling over his cheeks. "Uh," He hesitated, oblivious. "Sorry, I probably look like a mess, I didn't really wash up before leaving the house. Really needed breakfast. But I'm fine. Maybe went a bit hard last night."
open starter @shrikestart
location: the blue sparrow
Not remembering the night before was nothing new. That had been the modus operandi ever since the last attack. Going through the motions, numbing down the paranoia by getting high, getting drunk, or both. Whiting out on someone's couch. His own, last night. They had never been one to fall into a pattern of bad habits, and yet here they were, itching not to be sober any longer than they had to be.
They were still responsible enough to show up to work with their wits about them. Even though it wasn't exactly the profession they saw themselves having after pouring themselves into their studies growing up, they loved their job. Getting to put a permanent piece of his art on a person was an uncontested luxury. It was important that they kept that intact, even if their social life was going to shit.
Today was his day off though. It could not have come at a more welcome time, between the hangover and the lack of caffeine weighing his bones down. "Here," He set down a cup of coffee at the other end of the communal table at the centre of the cafe. "I ordered the wrong thing the first time, so... free coffee?" He said with an awkward, uneven smile. One side of his face was hurting like crazy and it wasn't until he thought of that that he realised he hadn't even looked himself in the fact that morning. Had he done so he would have been aware of the ugly pattern of bruising that was starting to form around his eye. He reached for his own mug of sweet, salted-caramel goodness, bringing it to his mouth for a sip. "If you want."
I feel unspeakably lonely. And I feel - drained. It is a blank state of mind and soul I cannot describe to you as I think it would not make any difference. Also it is a very private feeling I have - that of melting into a perpetual nervous breakdown. I am often questioning myself what I further want to do, who I further wish to be; which parts of me, exactly, are still functioning properly. No answers, darling. At all. - Anne Sexton.
Name: Lianjie Lixin (Li-Shin)
Nickname(s): Xin (family only), Lux (friends, former classmates) The story goes that during roll call the teachers never knew how to pronounce his name, pronouncing it Licksen, and leading to some jeers from the class room. He started introducing himself as Lux because it sounded less ethnic.
Age: 24.
Birthday: 20/2, 11pm, 1965
Zodiac: Pisces (Sun), Scorpio (Moon) Scorpio (Rising)
FC: Wang Yibo
Birthplace: Luoyan, China
Gender: Demiboy (not out to family)
Pronouns: He/They
Sexuality: Bisexual
Height: 1.8m
Scars/piercings/tattoos: Has tattoos literally all over his body. Neck tattoos, shoulder tattoos, rib tattoos, hand tattoos, etc. His chest is fairly bare as he is still working out what big piece he wants to put on there. His lip and nose are pierced and he has several ear piercings as well. He has a scar on his eyebrow from a snowball that had a piece of debris in it. He also has a scar on his shoulder he cannot remember.
Vices: Cannabis, alcohol (light-weight), cigarettes from time to time, junk food, casual sex.
Virtues: Studious, kind, has a lot of filial piety, well-behaved, lawful, hard-working, doting.
Blood type: O-
Occupation: Tattoo Artist at Skin Deep.
Family
Lixin was adopted into an American family as a toddler, has no recollection of his former life or former family. It was an open international adoption.
He is the middle child amongst his brothers, with a younger, adopted sibling named Duk-soo and an older, adopted sibling named Hoseok.
Due to having been adopted so early, Lixin has no relationship with his heritage or mother tongue.
He has shown no desire to get to know his biological family.
He has a good relationship with his parents, always wanting to please them and being careful not to step a toe out of line. He was always the first to volunteer to do chores and errands for their parents.
Of his siblings, Xin is probably the most put-together. He never went to his family about his problems (not that he had many) and kept to himself.
Of his two parents, he is marginally closer to his mother.
Lixin considers himself primarily American and even goes by an anglicised version of his name. Lux means 'Light' and Lixin means 'Sunrise', which was close enough to him to justify using it instead. His family calls him Xin however.
Has a fairly good relationship with his brothers but does not really feel like he can relate to either of them.
He is very doting of his brothers and tries to be practical and empathetic while staying out of their hair.
Personally does all his older brother, Hoseok's, tattoos, due to his reluctance to let anyone see his scars.
Has a matching tattoo with Hoseok. Lixin has a moon over his heart, whereas he tattooed a Sun on Hoseok.
Education
Always was a top performer in school, took all AP classes by the time he was a senior.
He can only speak English fluently and comfortably, but also took Spanish in school.
Really into sciences, but especially chemistry.
Despite being so academically driven, Lixin has always been artistic and used to doodle on all of his notebooks.
I HC that he was his year's valedictorian* at the high school he graduated from.
Went to an Ivy-league college but dropped out once he realised that he wasn't really convinced by his choice of degree. Decided to focus on art instead, but fully intends to get a degree once he knows what he wants to do.
Relationships
ooc: these will be updated over time as i plot with people.
Moon Hoseok//Adopted brother. @ofchrysoprase: Despite being the younger of the two, Lixin does his best to take care of Hoseok. He recognises how hard life has been on him and wants to do his best to provide softness into his life. Despite feeling close to his brother, he is hesitant to vent to him about his personal struggles, not wanting to burden him when he already has so much to deal with. They share a love of books and of art and it is something that has helped them bond over the years.
Ho Duk-Soo//Younger adopted brother. @urdamage: Duk-Soo entered his life when he was only 11. Initially, the thought of having a younger brother excited Lixin, but it was clear that adjustment was not as easy for Duk-soo as it had been for him. Lixin has a lot of affection for his younger brother, but is intimidated by him all the same. Duk-soo can also see right through his faรงade and knows how soft he actually is.
Personality
Though his appearance and initial demeanour give the impression of a tough boy, Lixin is very soft-hearted and fragile.
Xin is very sensitive and has a low pain threshold, crying very easily. He hides this fairly well in front of others, and will have a private cry as soon as he can.
Though he is very sensitive, he loves drowning in his own sadness by reading and watching very sad content.
Lixin is quiet when you first meet him, coming across cold and aloof, but it's just his shyness and once that wears off he actually talks a lot.
He's a bit of a know-it-all, providing explanations and corrections without anyone having asked.
Xin is both sentimental and family-oriented, really valuing his family as well as fond memories.
Despite being smart, Xin lacks street smarts in many ways and can can come across as naรฏve when it comes to certain things, especially where it concerns relationships.
A voracious reader, Xin wants the kind of love you can only read about in books and actively chases it. He is a serial crusher and will become infatuated with people very easily and quickly. He has probably had or has a crush on each and every one of his friends. The problem is that it takes them actually showing interest in return for the spell to wear off and for him to realise he only liked them as a friend.
The above leads to a lot of broken friendships. Xin is also a serial ghoster.
He is also a bit disloyal whenever he has been in a romantic relationship, having emotionally cheated on past partners. Right now he doesn't go for full-on relationships until he knows what he wants.
He is suffering from something of an identity crisis and has been for the past two years. It's been a motivation for his new look and tough-guy faรงade.
Falls into the model minority trope where he tried to fit in by assimilating as much as possible to American culture.
Really wants to be able to write a great American novel one day, but has no lived experiences worth writing about.
His alignment is lawful good, absolutely not a rule breaker at all.
Tries very hard to be edgy, but edgy doesn't want him back.
Bit of a scaredy cat but tries to play cool.
Very passive and non confrontational.
Misc.
Allergic to shellfish.
Blue-brown heterochromia.
Actually owns a motorbike, learned how to ride one just to be cool. Still isn't cool.
Absolute light-weight.
Smokes a lot of weed.
Was really into dinosaurs as a kid.
Has a stuffed fox his parents got him when they adopted him. It's still in his room.
Really susceptible to peer pressure.
Mild social anxiety.
Right-handed.
Wanted Connections
Friends to lovers to friends to lovers again: Xin has a hard time knowing what he wants and often jumps into crushes without really thinking about if he genuinely likes the person or not. I can imagine him having serious feelings for someone and not even realising that he does just because he'd had a crush on them before and 'gotten over it'.
Neighbours: Xin is a pretty light sleeper so maybe a louder neighbour who keeps him up at night (you decide what antics they get up to). Xin is far too nonconfrontational to complain about any of these antics so they have a strained, banter filled relationship.
Stoner buddies: self explanatory.
Exes: good terms, bad terms, basically people Xin clumsily fucked around with during his time in Shrike.
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Ian was new to the job but he'd already seen people in quite a few different states and Ian could instantly peg the man as stoned. He could tell by his enthusiasm and the way he seemed to slump over the door. Ian didn't mind though he'd smoked his fair share and was usually stoned when he ate pizza in general. "The barbecue is good. I think it's better than the marinara anyways." Ian reached into the pizza bag for the barbecue sauce. When asked about the garlic sauce he paused. "Well if you're looking to have over any surprise vampires then I'd recommend against it but I don't think it makes your breath smell any more than... well pizza does," Ian shrugged a little. He wasn't sure if he was supposed to be this honest with customers but he hadn't been given much training before being sent out with deliveries so he was learning as he went.
Ian reached deeper into the pizza bag for the receipt. "Uhhh, it'll be $8.75," Ian declared handing off the receipt. "i've got change in the car if you need it too. Same with that garlic sauce if you decide you want it," Ian said as he tucked the pizza bag under his arm and waited for his payment.
marinara, marinara, marinara - the word seemed to buzz around his head like a mosquito, bouncing off the walls relentlessly. what a funny word it was, but it was decidedly less funny that the word was holding him hostage. "i do like barbie-q," he agreed solemnly, standing at attention when the barbecue sauce made its appearance. the point about pizza making him smell did disturb him a bit though. would his breath smell quite badly? did he remember to buy mints before the blizzard? would his toothpaste be enough? "surprise vampires, i don't know. do you think - do you think vampires are in the realm of possibility? i mean, vampires do sort of exist, i guess. at least, vampirism exists, but not vampires like the mythical beings. but then again - maybe they do exist! we don't know. do you know?"
lixin reached into his back pocket, his movements languid and relaxed, finding a slightly crumpled 20 dollar bill. he stared at it for a long moment before offering it to ian. it took him way too much time to figure out that 20 dollars was for sure more than 8.75, but in his defence, half of that time was wondering if it was 8.75 or 875 and then berating himself for thinking a pizza could be 875 dollars. "here youuu go...sir."
โI hate solitude, but I am afraid of intimacy. The substance of my life is a private conversation with myself which to turn into a dialogue would be equivalent to self-destruction.โ
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Location: Noah's backyard (early afternoon, some time after the attack)
Closed: Lux ( @cerberust )
Noah didn't know what to do himself now that he was off work for another week, and wasn't leaving the house to go to class for a couple more days. He knew he'd have to face his fear of working closing shifts if he didn't want to outright quit, but he needed his job at Snapshot until the semester was over. He'd thought about applying for a summer job at Donna's, too, but with everything that happened, he was having a hard time visualizing himself staying at the roller rink until closing without feeling his stomach sink.
Thankfully, Lux agreed to come over and hang out to help Noah deal with the cabin fever he was feeling. Because he was still in recovery, Noah was loath to go looking for trouble and visiting his usual dealer, so he convinced Lux to bring a little extra weed and he'd pay him back and then some. Anything to help him relax and calm his nerves a bit, honestly. Noah sat on one end of the swinging bench in the back yard bundled up in an oversized sweater with a blanket around himself.
"It feels weird just being locked inside all day, but I can't really do anything that'll mess with the stitches," he said, bringing the joint to his lips and pulling in a small drag. Unfortunately for him, taking too large of a pull always resulted in a coughing fit, and that's another thing he needed to avoid. "I'm gonna have to suck it up really soon, though, if I wanna keep my job," he said miserably, as if he hadn't watched people get injured and killed right in front of him. His therapist would have so fucking much to unpack as soon as he was able to get out of the house again. "Like... I really wish this had been just an extended winter vacation and not... you know. Fucking recovery."
there were some truths that were undeniable. the first was that noah cohen was a good fucking person and the second was that good people deserved good things. the final truth was that this town was indiscriminate with who was punished. over the last few years, so many good people had fallen prey to the darkness lurking in the town. it still enraged to know that such a sunny person had been dragged into the worst kind of shadow. it was the kind of shadow that lingered - that taunted as one waited for any glimpse of sun creeping through the grey clouds. there was still a lot that the boy didn't know about that fateful tuesday. the stuff he did know was horrible enough to make him want to bury himself under his sheets forever and he had not even been there.
it was the fact he had not even been there that was pushing him to attempt at being strong for those around him that had been personally touched by the tragedy. the sight of his brother at the hospital had been enough to break his heart into several pieces and that was still nothing compared to the experience of having gone through it, the fear, the not knowing if they'd make it. when noah asked for this small favour, he had rushed to acquiesce. anything, he'd said, you just name it.
when he was there, sitting on the other end of the bench and trying to determine what the appropriate amount of concerned looks was, he felt that it was not even close to being enough. "mm," he hummed sympathetically. "you don't realise how important being out and about is for your mental until you can't." his eyebrows furrowed. "they can't seriously fire you for not 'getting over it' and needing more time though. it's the mall's fucking fault - they should be doing more at this point to protect their employees. or at least - at least - not sending us out in the middle of a fucking blizzard." he was in the process of rolling another joint, sitting with his legs folded and his body facing noah's. "i get that all they care about is money - i get that, but it can't be good for business if - you know. that. they're eventually going to have to care."
