gong yoo, bisexual, male + he/him hey look ― it’s benjamin park! they’re forty one years old, they’ve lived in shrike heights for five years, and they’re currently working at perkin’s pharmacy and clinic. i heard they’re pretty idealistic, but i think they’re so insightful at the same time. can they make it out alive? || aether, 28, he/him, cst + none
Basics
Full Name: Benjamin Park
Nickname(s): Dr. Ben, Benny
Pronouns: He/him
Orientation: Bisexual
Age: 41
Birthday: March 10, 1948 (Pisces)
Blood Type: O
Birthplace: Chicago, IL
Occupation: Psychiatrist at Perkin’s Pharmacy and Clinic
Detailed Bio: Here
Facts/RP Hooks
Chicagoan: Born in Chicago to immigrant parents who opened a thriving restaurant business, he was raised in the Windy City where he attended college, medical school, and has his residency. He lived in the big city practically his whole life until he met his ex-wife.
Divorced: They married young and even had a son, but the baby fell ill and passed. Unable to overcome the grief together after years, she left Benny while he was still pursuing his med-school studies, and moved to Canada.
Psychiatrist: Benny has been a licensed psychiatrist for 7 years, and hopes to build a lifelong career.
Shrike: Benny began his practice in Chicago, but after his personal life fell apart, he went on a cross-country road trip to clear his head. He wound up in Colorado, where fate brought him to Shrike Heights as a pit stop. Charmed by the small-town feel and beautiful mountain vistas, he decided to stay. Soon, he bought a small house downtown and moved his whole life there, including his budding career.
Perkin’s Pharmacy and Clinic: Known as Dr. Ben, he sees a lot of patients daily, but still has a flexibly open availability to see more.
Music Lover: Benjamin is often seen at Track’s and Key of Reason. He really loves music and has picked up learning to play guitar as a recreational hobby. He also loves rock music and is often on the lookout for any Thin Lizzy, The Smiths, or Rolling Stones albums he doesn’t have.
Personality
Benny is down to earth and considers himself a young soul. He is easily able to keep up with changing technology and trends. He does his best to stay in the loop, but that doesn’t mean he doesn’t act his age (or rather with a sense of maturity).
He’s a pretty open minded person and a great listener, often making friends in unlikely places when all they really needed was an ear to hear.
He’s been around for a while, and in the six years he’s been around, he’s taught himself how to play guitar. He loves music and talking about all kinds of genres!
Cooking is a passion of his, and he cooks for himself daily, sometimes inviting friends over.
Half-assing is NOT something he does! When he decides to do something, he goes all in or nothing at all, whether that be learning about something, keeping up his yard, housecleaning, or anything else.
Wanted Connections
Neighbors: Benny lives in a small house downtown by himself. He’d bought it with the intention of wanting to move in with his then wife, optimistic for a future together and another attempt at having children, but things didn’t work out.
Patients: Anyone in town who needs and/or already uses his services!
Guitar Pals: Someone who either is part of a band and is trying to convince him to play guitar with them, or just really anyone who loves guitar and jams out with him sometimes.
Drinking Buds: Peers around his age or older with whom he can go have drinks every once in a while.
Time’s Up: Possibly a connection where he and a patient developed a closer relationship than they’d anticipated or meant to, and for both their sakes, he had to refer them to someone else. This could be ongoing, or have been in the past.
Friends, rivals, romantic interests of any gender (he’s been here 6 years, who knows!), messy or clean, you name it!
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Drew poured their drinks and listened to Ben talk about his family and his origins. While Drew had felt overwhelmed by the size of Colorado Springs, it was still nearly a hundred times smaller than Chicago, so he could only imagine how Ben felt about it. "The move here must've been a culture shock," he realized, sliding one of the glasses over Ben's way. Even though Ben wanted to move to Shrike Heights, wanted to build his life here, Drew couldn't imagine it being any less than a shock to the system, having to adapt his lifestyle so much. Drew enjoyed the adaptation, who he'd become since moving to town, but he couldn't deny it was different, even for him. "Still, I figure giving up protracted bar crawls is well worth it for feeling at home some place." It was a bit cheesy, and he didn't want to put words in Ben's mouth about Shrike Heights, but that was at least how Drew felt.
At the thought of reinvention, Drew thought about his own change over the past four years. He wasn't too dissimilar to the person he was growing up, in college, and in the Army, but he had certainly grown into himself. He felt more stable, more secure in who he was and what he had to offer. He didn't feel as small anymore, and that was a gift. Even with the dangers they faced in town, the threats that seemed to never quite subside, he still couldn't imagine himself anywhere else. "Those seem like some great tools for the job," he laughed gently, leaning against the counter as he drank some of his wine. "I made her cassoulet for Christmas one year, and I don't think I can look at white beans the same again." He admitted. He loved cooking for large gatherings and groups; it made him feel connected to the community around him. But the labor involved, especially with a project like cassoulet, definitely left him feeling like he'd run a marathon. "But now that you've admitted that, next family dinner you come to, I've got high expectations." He teased, laughing as he watched Ben work.
Ben offered to play for him, and Drew tried not to flush at the idea. "I'd love that," he admitted genuinely, trying not to let the softness in his voice show. "I haven't got a musical bone in my body, so I don't even think I'd be able to tell." He added with a shrug. None of his family was particularly creative or musically gifted, though his youngest brother could hold a tune – at least when they were younger. That talent had skipped right over Drew, and so Ben could literally play 'Twinkle, Twinkle, Little Star,' and Drew would be hooked.
At Ben's follow-up question, Drew hummed in thought to himself, taking a sip of wine to allow himself more time to think. "What have I been holding out on you? I mean, I was a pretty decent baseball player when I was eight and in little league – meaning, I managed to hit the ball off the tee most of the time. And aside from cooking, I guess I'd consider amateur photography a hobby. They're nothing to write home about, but I like to take my Polaroid on weekends when I'm out hiking with Coop and Fredo." He offered with a shrug, not self-deprecating but just realistic. "If you ever want to join us, you're more than welcome. Coop's already given you the seal of approval." He noted, nodding at the back door where the dog had gone outside.
"The move certainly was, but that was exactly what I was looking for. Something different. I'm glad I found it here, where I was able to start over," Ben replied, stealing a quick glance at Drew after taking the drink slid his way. "And exactly that," he said, nodding in agreement to the other's words. "I wanted someplace that felt like home, that wasn't tainted by my past or expectations for my future from people who thought they knew me," he added. Ben wasn't sure he'd ever admitted that to anyone before. "It's been a good thing. Figuring out how to live life on my own terms. Exploring a new state, a new town, new hobbies." He smiled and paused what he was doing briefly to really turn and look at the other. "New people." He let the moment linger in a comforting pause for a moment before he took a sip from his drink and turned back to the dish.
"What about you? What keeps you here? Where do you see yourself in... I don't know. A year? Five?" he asked curiously. He wanted to know more about the things that motivated Drew. Not from the perspective of a caregiver, never that again, but from someone precariously hoping to rekindle a hearth fire to warm something in one or both.
He had to laugh when Drew mentioned the Julia Childs cassoulet, fully knowing just how much of a gauntlet that was! "Please don't tell me you tried to do all the prep in one day like I did. By the time I was done, I didn't even want to try the damn thing. The dish was as ugly as ugly gets but I have to give it to her, it was delicious," he chuckled. "But I'd be happy to help next time, especially if it's gonna be judged by your family," he said, amused by the idea Drew brought up about Ben joining him for a family dinner. It was nice talking about their individual hobbies. Ben found himself thinking about playing something on his guitar for him next time, and caught himself looking forward to there being a next time to begin with. And he could easily see himself going on walks with the other, watching him snap photos and seeing the world through his eyes. He didn't want to get ahead of himself though, not without knowing how Drew felt. There would be plenty of time to figure that out. So he pulled himself back to the present moment.
Once the pasta was ready, it only took minutes for him to get the cheese and pepper down to a perfectly creamy combination, and only a minute more to plate two servings for them. They could worry about cleaning in a moment, this had to be savored right off the pan in his opinion. "Bon appetit!" he said, sliding a plate over to Drew. "Give me an honest review, too. I wanna know if I have something to fall back on if I ever decide I want to switch careers," he smirked.
Neptune was not sure how big malls tended to be. They were an entirely foreign concept to him. It was a very small town, though, so maybe that was a fair statement. "Oh, I don't know," He said breathily, twisting his mouth. "I just know the mall feels like a city in of itself, so I s'pose it is a wee bit bigger than I expected." At the question about Texas, he shook his head no. He had never heard the saying either. Confused, he questioned, "Everything?"
It was Neptune's first time meeting a therapist, now that he thought about it. None of his parents' scholarly friends happened to specialise in psychiatry and that was really the only way he might have met someone of a more refined background, the people he hung around with otherwise being aimless artists just like himself. "It's nice to meet you, Doctor Ben," He said with a wide smile. "Well I...I suppose you could say my life blew up, and isn't the best thing to do to build a brand new one, when that happens? I thought I might as well go big and travel somewhere new while I was at it."
Ben chuckled when the other hadn't heard the saying, then nodded. "I think so! I wouldn't know for sure myself, though. I've only driven past the northern borders of Texas, and it seemed pretty normal to me." Then he gave the boy a nod. "You're not wrong, though. It does feel like a small city all on its own, doesn't it?"
He listened to the other telling him about his life and certainly understood the need for starting over somewhere knew. "I know a thing or two about rebuilding your life when things blow up. I hope you find what you're looking for here," he said. Although he knew that in the back of his mind, things could get more complicated in Shrike, of all places, given what they'd been going through lately. "How do you like it here so far? I know you said you wanted to go big and travel somewhere new, but is winding up in someplace small what you envisioned? I'm curious to know how you heard about Shrike Heights to begin with," he mused.
“Did they let you listen to any music?” Leo asked, still kind of shocked. He’d heard of parents being that protective and sheltering their children to a fault, but he didn’t really know what was like. “I mean like classical music or something?” he elaborated. “It could be worse. There’s a lot of classical music I’d rather listen to than rock, but I’m a pianist, so I guess my opinion might be different than yours.” Leo laughed, but he was thinking about the fact that he had just called himself a pianist; it had been awhile since he’d done that, rather than just saying he played piano. To him, those were different things, and neither felt quite right anymore. Focusing instead on Ben rather than that, Leo could tell that the man was passionate, and he respected the hell out of that, smiling as he listened. “You know your shit, I can tell,” he mused. “I think maybe that’s part of what makes music great. It’s always evolving, and even the older stuff sometimes changes because of the way people view it. Like the music maybe doesn’t change, but the way it’s perceived and the feelings it invokes can, and I think that’s really cool.” Normally he might make a comment about how he probably wasn’t making any sense, but Leo just had a sense that Ben understood.
As talk shifted to his piano skills, Leo just shrugged noncommittally. “Maybe better than just okay, yeah,” he admitted, his voice a little sad. There’d been a time when he’d been called a prodigy or a musical genius or something of the sort, and now he…was. Yeah, he was better than “okay,” but that wasn’t good enough for Leo. That was something he definitely didn’t want to discuss though, so Leo just shrugged again.
Leo almost closed his eyes as he listened to Ben, letting himself get lost in the music. It helped that Ben had chosen a good song, but there was something about someone who wasn’t technically perfect that really appealed to Leo. It felt more…authentic. It felt like there was more passion in it for some reason. When they were done and Ben complimented him, Leo just smiled. “I’m fine I guess. But I wasn’t ever going to be a professional singer, not like - “ Leo stopped abruptly; he’d been about to say “not like piano,” but he didn’t want to discuss that. Still, he couldn’t ignore the question. “It used to be,” Leo answered. “There was a time when it was everything, apart from my family and friends I mean. Now it’s just…there.” The truth was that Leo felt like he had lost his music, and it was a loss he felt in his core.
Ben laughed at the surprise in the other and he nodded. "Yes, they did. They let us listen to what they listened to mostly, but I did hear my fair share of classical, but I also listened to a lot of jazz and blues, especially in a place like Chicago where it thrived. Folk music, too. Bob Dylan, Peter, Paul and Mary, Simon and Garfunkel. Rock and roll was seen as hard and rebellious. It still is, but it was even more so when I was growing up. The first half of my life, I spent watching the Vietnam War unfold, but making commentary on it as someone who didn't serve, particularly from an immigrant background, was a bit taboo, and my parents knew the dangers of that. They wanted to keep my siblings and I safe, you know? But kids grow up and make their own decisions about what to do and what to listen to. If you ask me now, I'd tell you the Clash is a brilliant band," he explained. "But you're right, music changes. It's messages change, too. Part of it is conveyed in lyrics, but most of it, in my humble opinion, is conveyed in the sounds," he added, raising his brows with a smile.
As he listened to Leo, he really listened to what was between the words, in the pauses of what he was saying. Ben saw how Leo closed his eyes to get lost in the music, and then how he seemed to let that go when he was brought back to the reality of being in a music instrument store instead of somewhere else. "It sounds to me like you need to figure out where music went for you. I can see it means a lot to you still. Maybe you need to find your voice in a different way. But who's to say better than you?" he asked, leaving the question at Leo's feet like a morning newspaper for him to read and consider later on his own.
He still had the guitar in his hands when he gave the strings a few strums, playing the opening couple of notes of "Should I Stay Or Should I Go". He put his hands over the strings gently and smiled up at Leo. "I think I'll get it. I like the way it sounds, and the heft of it. It's a lot lighter than it looks on the display," he said. "You'll have to find something else to put up on the window now," he added with a chuckle.
Lixin thought it would be a nice thing to have a stronger constitution. There was something poetic about the imagery of a person drinking multiple coffees a day, especially an artist. It was the sort of thing novelists put together when telling a good story. It was also the sort of thing he really strove toward. The illusion of being cool or enigmatic, even though he was too aware of how paper thin that persona was and how different the boy beneath it all really was. Even something as simple as being unable to handle excess caffeine felt like a new brand of failure. "You're very welcome," He said with a smile. "Do you usually drink a few cups a day then?"
It was difficult not to wince, openly cringing as he thought about how bad he must look to warrant that much concern. It wasn't like he had worn enough makeup that he should have panda eyes or anything of that nature. Was he unclean? Briefly, he considered his options and wondered if he should excuse himself to lean up. "I'm okay, just you know... hungover. Uh, you're fine. I must look real bad though, huh?"" He mumbled, his posture turning self conscious, shoulders hunching forward. "Good you told me, I should probably clean up before visiting my parents.""
Ben took a sip from the hazelnut coffee and let out a quiet hum of approval. To the credit of the coffee shop, they rarely made anything he didn't like, and he was surprised but grateful for the extra free cup that morning. When the younger man asked if he drank a lot of coffee typically, Ben gave a slight nod. "Sometimes. Sometimes I'll opt for tea instead. But I do sometimes need a lot of caffeine to stay focused throughout the day," he admitted with a quiet smile. "I work with a lot of people, and I need to be able to pay attention to all of the information that comes my way all day." Too much information sometimes, but that was a part of the job, he supposed.
While he hadn't meant to be so blunt about the younger man's appearance, he was a bit worried why someone would have injuries like that. It wasn't his business to pry when he wasn't being paid for it, but knowing Shrike Heights well enough, he just hoped nothing really bad had happened to him. When the other mentioned needing to clean up, Ben gave him a small smile. "It's hard to clean up bruising," he mentioned quietly, discreetly gesturing to his own face. "That looks like it hurt. Are you sure you're okay?"
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august laughed and he nodded his head because the teasing had truth to it. “honestly, it’s kind of shameful to have lived in a place as small as shrike heights for this long without exploring it all. in my defence, though, video games are to blame,” he admits, truthfully but in jest at the same time. “i got a job at the arcade pretty much right after moving here, and i became one of those mindless zombies that the news warns you about. you’re lucky to see me outside at all, in fact,” he laughed. “it’s a lot more understandable for chicago,” he spoke up again after a minute. “to not explore it all, that is. it’s way bigger than this place. not that i’ve ever been there myself, but that’s not my point,” he chuckled. “i think it’s safe to assume that every place is bigger than shrike, so even if i’m not exactly right, i’m not exactly wrong,” he defended his lack of knowledge, though he did know for sure that chicago was monstrously bigger than shrike heights, so the defence was coming up for no good reason.
“yeah, you’ve gotta take these moments while you can,” august nodded. “if you don’t, you find yourself completely overwhelmed, with way too much to do and to handle, but you’re completely burnt out, and you don’t have the ability to get through it all like you’d want,” it was something that august had put himself through many times before, but also something that he was positive the other person already understood clearly, too. “i think i can be pretty persuasive, i think i can get him to enjoy his time up here,” even if august isn’t able to convince him to go ice skating, he hoped to partake in some kind of winter activity. it was what they both needed - what most of the town needed, even - after having another extremely difficult year. if they could at least throw a couple of snowballs at each other, no matter how childish it might be, august would be glad for it. “and even if it’s still a part of shrike,” the mountains, and the lodge, “it’s taking away the monotony of your usual routine down there in the rest of the town. it’s nice.”
“I understand, though, don’t worry,” Ben assured him. “Trust me, I completely understand what that’s like. I work at Perkin’s, and there’s a few places I like to hang out, but I’m not exactly the most adventurous person. It took me a few years to even realize there was a resort here,” he chuckled. “I feel like I’m always working, and when I’m not, I’m thinking about working. But I’m hoping a little getaway will help with all of that,” he said with a slow nod. “But you’re right, Chicago was a much bigger place, and even though I grew up there, I didn’t really have the desire to explore every nook of it,” he admitted. “And sometimes that’s just it. You know a place well enough, you don’t have a need to see all of it all the time. I think it’s nice to leave a little mystery, to leave something unexplored for another time,” he shrugged.
He agreed with August in that he needed to take time for himself wherever he could. While Ben hadn’t burned out yet, he knew on occasion he approached that threshold. He did a good job pulling himself back from it, but lately it felt harder with everything that had been happening in town. Ben smiled when August talked about convincing his travel partner to go ice skating and enjoy their time there. “That’s what it’s all about. Taking a break from the usual. It doesn’t matter where it is, your mind just needs to focus on anything else, or nothing at all as long as you’re in a different but welcomed environment,” he nodded.
Ben looked around and gave a little sigh. “I should probably head back inside before I freeze to death. But if you see me around, don’t be a stranger. Let me know if you end up convincing your friend to ice skate. It’ll be a great story if you do, I have a feeling,” he chuckled.
"Really?" Leo asked when Ben said that his parents hadn't let him listen to that kind of music. It wasn't a judgement, but Leo couldn't imagine that kind of lifestyle. "That must have sucked," he stated. "My parents are both music lovers and used to share all kinds of things with me. songs and artists and bands that they liked. I really think that's part of why it's such a passion with me too. It's cool that you developed a love for it despite not growing up the same way." And he meant that too. Nodding, he replied, "Yeah, it's sort of always been my thing." Leo paused, deciding how much he wanted to say, but since he'd already mentioned playing piano, he figured it was okay to elaborate just a little. "My parents started me on piano when I was younger, and I've been playing ever since. I guess I was okay at it." That was of course an understatement - Leo was talented enough to get into a school with about a 7% acceptance rate, so he was much more than "okay at it." But he didn't want to brag, especially since that was in the days before the accident. "You know, it's really hard to learn music just by listening to it. That's...actually really impressive. Once you know how to read sheet music, it's easier to learn songs that way I think. I could teach you sometime maybe if you wanted." Leo was as surprised as Ben probably was by this suggestion because it wasn't like him at all. But he was enjoying this conversation, and it was nice sharing a passion with someone. Laughing, Leo nodded and replied, "Yeah, that's totally normal. I mean, I'm not knocking it, but...it was definitely kind of strange."
When Ben mentioned his profession, Leo paused; he had no idea he'd been talking to a therapist. But it didn't really affect his opinion of Ben, not negatively at least. "You're just full of surprises," he stated with a little smile. "I used to go there, but I...uh, decided I didn't need therapy anymore." He told his parents he still went, but that was a lie and had been for quite some time. "You'd probably need something to unwind, especially after stressful days," Leo responded. He was glad he hadn't made things weird with his comment, moving past it just like Ben had. "That's the cool thing about music," Leo said. "It can transport you. It sounds like a cliché, but it's true. It's one thing I love about it." And it was one thing he missed about playing piano. Resisting to urge to wallow in his loss, Leo just listened as Ben began to play, and he immediately smiled when he recognized the song. And for just a few seconds, Leo sang along, softly, not drawing attention to the two of them, and he was smiling even more brightly when they were finished. "Great song," he told Ben.
Ben chuckled and gave Leo a nod. "They did not. They thought it was too loud and noisy, so I'd always just go over to my friends' houses to listen to rock and roll," he said with a smile, remembering his teenage years. "The sixties saw a lot of bands coming up. The Rolling Stones, The Who, The Doors. Even The Beatles. Music's changed a lot since then, and it'll keep changing, but I kind of like to ride that wave of change and hear what's new. Rock is harder now. You have metal, and punk. It's a phenomenon," he said with a smile. Ben certainly had an appreciation for it all, and definitely loved keeping up with it.
He agreed with Leo. It was hard to learn music by just listening to it, but he'd been doing it for so long now that it almost came naturally. He knew his way around most guitars that he could hear something and mimic it well. "Learning by ear is one thing, but you learned from a young age. I have a feeling you're better at piano than you're letting on," he smiled. Especially if the other was offering a reading lesson on sheet music.
Ben was a therapist at Perkin's, but he wasn't anyone's therapy warden, so he didn't judge Leo for having decided he didn't need therapy anymore. "You go when you're ready for it, you know?" he said with a slow nod. He certainly agreed with Leo in the power music had to transport you. He was glad to have had the opportunity to play a little bit on the display guitar, but Ben was surprised to hear Leo joining in and singing along with the music he was playing. "I agree. Fleetwood Mac is pretty good. You're not half bad yourself, though," he mused, when they finished. "It seems like music is a pretty big part of of your life. Am I wrong about that?"
“Oh, yeah, of course.” Dante was quick to backpaddle, even though he didn’t see too much wrong with exaggerating his skills just slightly to try and get a better job. He didn’t have many to begin with, so he had to make due with what he did have. However, being in the presence of a licensed psychologist made him feel like he probably didn’t know what he was talking about. Then again, it would only really matter if he ever decided he’d grown tired of his job as a hairdresser and needed to apply somewhere new.
It felt strange to look at his job like something similar to a therapy session or of himself as someone that complete strangers trusted with their appearance. Maybe he had avoided looking at it that way because it added so much more pressure to something that was supposed to be a job he’d taken to escape from the hell that was accounting. “Well, if they ever don’t end up wanting to come back, I could maybe change their mind by telling them my best mathematical joke?” Dante was sure that if someone ever left his chair feeling horrible about themselves, he would just quit his job that same day, but seriously talking about his feelings just happened to be something he was extremely allergic to.
The reminder of his neighbor dilemma made him throw back what was left of his own drink in despair. “Ah, man, shit. Do your clients often disappoint you? Because you should prepare yourself, big time.” Dante shook his head and let out a sigh. “It would mean so much more to me if you could just vent about your own life to me instead. That’s what I’m used to, you know?”
“That’s not to say it’s a wrong thing to do, or anything like that,” Ben clarified, chuckling quietly. He wasn’t there to over analyze anything Dante was talking about when it came to work or hyping up his own skills. Ben was confident that the other knew what he was talking about when it came to his own career field.
Ben grinned when Dante talked about bringing a customer back around with a mathematical joke. “That’d be one hell of a joke. I’d love to hear it,” he mused. “But if you shaved my head way too short, I don’t think I’d be coming back, no matter how good the joke was,” he teased. Ben had a feeling that wasn’t a usual occurrence for Dante. He seemed like he knew what he was doing behind a chair, even if Ben hadn’t seen it first hand. He shook his head and smiled. “It’s hard to mess up my cut though, impossible1 even. So you might definitely see me coming soon. I’m kind of overdue anyway,” he mentioned.
“Hey, you’re not my client! So by all means, feel free to disappoint me,” he snorted when they got to talking about the neighbor trouble. “But maybe when next we see each other, we can flip the script,” he chuckled. Ben set down his now empty glass and grabbed his coat to head out. “It was nice meeting you Dante. I’m sure we’ll meet again soon,” he said with a smile.
Drew stepped back as Ben unloaded the groceries for their dinner, moving to the cabinet where he kept the alcohol. He wasn't a heavy drinker – his parents and older brother subscribed to the compulsory drink-with-dinner practice, beer or whiskey for the men and wine for his mother – but he'd never found the habit particularly compelling. And too often, he saw people he served with leaning on alcohol to help them cope with their traumas; enough exposure to that would leave a bad taste in anyone's mouth. But he enjoyed the occasional indulgence, especially for special occasions. And while reconnecting over dinner with a friend might not be everyone's definition of "special," Drew disagreed.
All that said, his liquor cabinet wasn't much to look at. There were a few wines, a bottle of tequila he's hardly touched, and a nice bourbon his family got him as a homecoming present when he came back from deployment that he hasn't opened. Thankfully, he had a pinot noir that looked at least halfway decent, and he pulled it from the cabinet as he listened to Ben talk about his summers in South Korea. "Is a lot of your family there?" He asked, looking back after grabbing two wine glasses and the bottle opener.
"Did you want some now, or did you want to wait?" He asked, holding up the wine bottle in question. He opened the bottle as Ben told him his own story of how he came to town. It was a familiar sentiment the other man shared, feeling the pull of the small community and the appeal of life outside of all the big city noise. He was born in raised in Colorado Springs, and while it wasn't Denver, the city had always been a little too big for him. "I know the feeling. It felt a little bit like starting fresh." He mused. "And selfishly, I'm glad you decided to move anyway. Though I'm sorry to hear things didn't work out." He vaguely remembered Ben mentioning something about his ex-wife before, but he'd never felt it was appropriate to pry or follow-up. He seemed at least at peace with it, so Drew left it alone.
"I know what you mean," he smiled then as Ben talked about the struggle of maintaining and building friendships as an adult. "It's hard to get to know people when you aren't forced to be around them for school or work. It takes effort." He agreed. It was why he hosted his family dinners in town and why he worked at the pet store. It would be easy to go from the clinic to his house every day and hardly see anyone who wasn't a client. If he didn't make the effort, he wouldn't find himself in situations like this, taking the chance to reconnect with Ben after so long. "I don't think I've heard you play guitar before, though." He recalled them with a smirk. "First, you cook. Now, you play music. You've been holding out on me, Dr. Park." He teased with a laugh.
Ben was guilty of being someone who used alcohol to cope sometimes, but he wasn't as dependent on alcohol to get through his days as others he knew. He didn't drink daily, and didn't really do so at home, but every now and then, he'd indulge at Julio's and it had been conducive to meeting new people at least. He didn't feel so alone when he spent time there, he supposed. And while he was there at Drew's place, he had no inclination to drink in excess. At least, not in the moment.
When asked about his family in Korea, Ben nodded. "I have a lot of extended family there, although all of my immediate family is here in the states. Specifically in Chicago," he said. "My siblings and I were born there some time after my parents settled into the Windy City," he explained. He nodded when Drew opened the bottle and cinched his index and thumb together to indicate he'd have a little to start off with, at least while he began cooking.
Ben nodded in agreement to the sentiment of having a fresh start, and he couldn't help the little smile when Drew said he was glad Ben had moved in. "I'm glad I moved in, too. Like you said, it felt like a fresh start. I wanted to reinvent myself in some ways, feel like someone new while still being... me, I suppose," he said. "I got a Julia Childs recipe book, and an electric guitar to try and navigate the seas that the wind pushed me into, so to speak."
While it was true that it was hard to make new friends now as an adult, he was also glad that he wasn't too shy or too guarded to reconnect with someone he'd gotten close to before. And a part of him maybe selfishly hoped that connection would reestablish as strong if not stronger than before, but he kept that to himself. It was better not to go into these things with any expectations. When Drew teased him for holding out, Ben raised his brows and smiled again. "Hey, you never asked! But I suppose I never offered either. I'd be happy to play for you sometime, if you promise not to make fun of me for hitting the wrong chords sometimes," he laughed, shredding the parm as the water for the pasta heated up. "But the question now is, what have you been holding out on me about yourself?" he asked, stealing a quick, playful little glance at Drew, as if he had any hidden talents there lurking.
Hoseok nodded. Though he was particular about the kind of music he enjoyed, he was willing to at least give the recommendation a try. The boy absentmindedly tried to scratch his arm, soon remembering his coat was too thick to do so. He was still grateful for the change of topic to distract him from his earlier anxiety attack however, realizing his heartrate had calmed down and his head seemed far less cloudy than it had a few minutes ago. He tried not to dwell on the fact that it was Ben’s job, instead focusing on being grateful that someone capable had been his company in the moment, rather than a stranger.
“Uh, we can check,” He decided after some hesitation, part of him still worried that some random person was going to be inside the cabin and wonder how he had been stupid enough to mistake the place for his own. In his defense, he had only arrived that day and barely paid attention to the inside and outside of the cabin, assuming that he would be walking back with Maxxie, who had a much better memory and sense of direction than he did. After patting down his pockets for a moment, he located the key and hesitantly slinked over towards the door, his heart back to pounding in his throat. “Do I knock first?”
Ben looked around to see how far he was from his own cabin, but his cabin was a bit further down. Not that he felt the need to comment on it or anything at the moment. He thought about maybe going back for that hot chocolate after he dropped Hoseok off, or maybe just continuing on so he could read more of his book. It had been an interesting trip so far, to say the least.
Ben smiled when Hoseok asked if he should knock, then gave a little nod. “If you have the right key, I don’t imagine it would work if it wasn’t your cabin. But knocking might help if it isn’t, so it won’t startle Maxxie if he’s in there, or worst case scenario a stranger isn’t scared by the wiggling around of a key at their door,” he mused, not straying too far just in case they had to do a little searching for the right door.
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After he had said it, it dawned on him how suspect offering a stranger free coffee could sound. An itch of anxiety overcame him, but he was careful not to let it show on his face. "Mhm," He nodded in confirmation, lowering his mug before wiping away the foam that had caught on his upper lip. "I don't think I can have two cups off coffee. Or, I mean, I could, but I don't think it'll be too pleasant. I'm pretty sensitive to caffeine. One cup is all I need."
His nose scrunched up. "Nothing's...wrong with it. It's just... it's hazelnut flavoured and I wanted caramel, but my brain wasn't really working so I said hazelnut, but I meant I wanted caramel and I didn't really realise until after, you know?"
The question about his face took him aback, a flush settling over his cheeks. "Uh," He hesitated, oblivious. "Sorry, I probably look like a mess, I didn't really wash up before leaving the house. Really needed breakfast. But I'm fine. Maybe went a bit hard last night."
Ben nodded in response to the other's confirmation. "You know, that's a very common thing. I think I might have an iron stomach, because I can drink a few cups a day and feel fine. As long as I don't do it too late at night, then I'm tired, but jittery," he mused, deciding to accept the free coffee and pull it closer. He needed all the caffeine he could get that morning anyway. "Hazelnut's not bad to me, either, so... thanks!"
Ben realized that he could've had a little more tact asking about the younger man's face. In fact, he knew better than to ask the way he had, but he still had his flaws as a person, especially when he was still in the throes of sleep inertia and wasn't fully awake yet. "My apologies, I should probably mind my own business," he offered with an apologetic smile. "I don't always blurt out what's on my mind at breakfast. Are you okay, though?" he asked, the question being more sincerely asked this time.
Now that Leo knew this customer really knew his music and wasn't just browsing, he was much happier to talk. Really he knew he shouldn't be that way, that he should talk to everyone because he might help awaken a passion for music, and he usually did, but he knew he was much more engaged when there was already basis there, like it was with this customer. Despite everything that had happened, Leo still loved talking about music. "Did you teach yourself?" Leo asked. "That's what I've been trying to do, and it's been difficult. Reading about it in a book isn't the same as being trained by a pro. I can't imagine trying to learn piano this way, so I'm glad I had a good teacher." Leo realized then that he'd mentioned playing the piano, which hadn't been his intention; hopefully he could downplay it if this guy asked about it. "Weird question, but...do you happen to have a picture of it?" Leo asked. "This guy came in the other day, and instead of pictures of his kids in his wallet, he had pictures of his guitar. It was kind of weird but, like, in a good way. And I see why he had them because it was beautiful."
The pair headed toward the front of the store where the guitar this customer had asked about was displayed, and Leo replied, "It's nice to meet you too, Ben. What do you do over at Perkin's? Since you're not in the rock and roll business." He gave Ben a cheeky smile as he said this, and then he turned toward the display. They'd reached the guitar, and Leo grabbed it gently, treating it with the reverence it deserved. "Now you've got to promise to be careful," Leo cautioned, but he was already handing Ben the Gibson. As he gave it to Ben, Leo said, "Keeps you young, hmm? Well it seems to be working." Then he paused, shaking his head. "I don't even know what I mean by that," he sighed, a little embarrassed. Really it was probably because Ben was handsome, but he still wished he hadn't said it. "Anyway," Leo went on, recovering a bit, "do you want to play a few chords? You know, get a feel for it a bit?"
Benjamin nodded at Leo's question. "I did! I've loved rock and roll, and even punk music for quite a long time, but growing up I wasn't allowed to listen to it much," he chuckled. His parents had been pretty conservative when it came to that kind of thing. "But when I moved to Shrike, I kind of wanted to reinvent parts of myself, and one of the first things I saw was the Stratocaster at a shop window and decided... why not? And went for it. I still don't really know how to read music, but I can learn songs and play by ear," he explained. "What about you? Have you always been a lover of music?" When asked if he had a picture of his guitar, Ben laughed and shook his head. "No, I'm not that vain about it, it's just a hobby! I mean, it is a beautiful instrument, but I'm not carrying a photo of it around," he mused.
Once they headed to the display and Leo asked what Ben did over at Perkin's, he smiled. "Well, I'm a therapist there," he explained. "I love my job, but I'm glad I have something engaging to go home to, or my work would get to me," he said, gesturing at the guitar as Leo pulled it out. He grinned when Leo said music kept him young, and he nodded, brushing past the other's slight awkwardness. "Haha! No, you're right! Sometimes I feel like time's getting away from me, but when I play, it seems to stand still. It makes me feel like I'm still in college somehow, even though I never had an inclination to play back then." He held the Gibson carefully, but comfortably, and began to play a few cords to test it, then began to string notes together. Leo would probably be able to recognize the start of Rhiannon by Fleetwood Mac, but Ben didn't play for more than about half a minute before he stopped.
Benjamin is actually proud of his resilience and adaptability. He's experienced some hardships that could've broken him entirely, but he's found a way to move on and rebuild his life. He's also always looking for ways to improve and reinvent himself, like when he picked up a guitar to learn something new. It might not always be like that, but he hopes that if he's ever forced to face the Shrike killers himself, he'll be able to survive that, too.
what is something benjamin would consider to be his biggest secret?
Ben's biggest secret is that despite the mask of optimism and hope he presents, despite his desire to help people, he's actually a very depressed person and sometimes borders on nihilism. Usually when he's really drunk and alone late at night. It's been better lately, however, as he's been spending more time with people he cares about. Apollo is his best friend and he's been reconnecting with Andrew, so he feels like trying to be happy might not be so pointless after all.
While he finds that his job can be really hard sometimes, he doesn't regret it one bit. Ben's always known that he wanted to help people and he really feels like he's found his calling in Shrike. If it's up to him, Ben wants to continue working in this field until he reaches retirement age.
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what is ben's favorite item of clothing that he owns?
Ben's favorite piece of clothing he wears at home is probably a junky old sweatshirt he wears around the house. It's got the very faded logo of a band he went to see years ago, but now it's essentially just like pajamas at this point.
However, he has a black members only jacket he loves to wear when it's cooler weather out. He isn't wearing it much these days, but he loves it!
open starter @shrikestart
location: the blue sparrow
Not remembering the night before was nothing new. That had been the modus operandi ever since the last attack. Going through the motions, numbing down the paranoia by getting high, getting drunk, or both. Whiting out on someone's couch. His own, last night. They had never been one to fall into a pattern of bad habits, and yet here they were, itching not to be sober any longer than they had to be.
They were still responsible enough to show up to work with their wits about them. Even though it wasn't exactly the profession they saw themselves having after pouring themselves into their studies growing up, they loved their job. Getting to put a permanent piece of his art on a person was an uncontested luxury. It was important that they kept that intact, even if their social life was going to shit.
Today was his day off though. It could not have come at a more welcome time, between the hangover and the lack of caffeine weighing his bones down. "Here," He set down a cup of coffee at the other end of the communal table at the centre of the cafe. "I ordered the wrong thing the first time, so... free coffee?" He said with an awkward, uneven smile. One side of his face was hurting like crazy and it wasn't until he thought of that that he realised he hadn't even looked himself in the fact that morning. Had he done so he would have been aware of the ugly pattern of bruising that was starting to form around his eye. He reached for his own mug of sweet, salted-caramel goodness, bringing it to his mouth for a sip. "If you want."
It had been one of those mornings that had been an absolute struggle for Ben to drag himself out of bed. Maybe he'd had a little more to drink than he should've the night before. At the time, it had felt like a good idea, but now he was really feeling the tiredness that tugged at his bones. At first, he didn't realize the cup had been set down for him until he heard someone talking and heard the words 'free coffee'. He glanced up as if trying to piece together what he missed, and caught sight of the younger man with bruises around his eye.
"Free coffee... are you sure?" he asked, making sure he'd heard at least that part correctly as he reached for the cup. "What's wrong with this one?" he asked. He had his own half-finished cup with a breakfast he'd started picking at. Dr. Park would've been comfortably tucked into bed still if he didn't have to come to work. He definitely needed to wake up if he was going to face appointment after appointment of other people's problems. "Is your face okay?" he blurted out, not having the time to maybe think about easing into the question before it just came out.