Celeste

The world is ending and I’m enjoying every last minute

I enjoy the fire that spreads across the hills

it keeps me warm

I swim in the rising water since I never had the chance to before

I dance outside as the thunderstorms create a beautiful symphony

The lightning that lights up the sky is god taking my picture for no one has ever seen me smile so brightly

There is no way to tell if tomorrow will be burning hot or freezing cold

However, right now is perfect

So I frolic in fields that are dying and mourn all the life that has already been taken

My mother told me strawberries are poisonous and roses will make you bleed

I was taught since I can remember that if you accept a gift there will be something grave you have to give in return

Your mind , body , and soul can be sold just for a box of chocolates

The stuff animals are only given as a reminder of how fragile you truly are .

When your heart begins to beat just a little quicker then usual you are done for

Make a grave for yourself before they do it for you

The endless gifts that could be given all have deceit written all over them

Professional tricksters is what my mom calls those people

The one who tells you sweet words and gives even sweeter heart shaped food

If your not careful they will devour your heart like you devoured that chocolate

They will leave no scrapes just like you didn’t

My moms words always ring in my ears when I see a gift now “ deception, fraud , and betrayal.” On a continuous loop to remind me that the giver is also a taker .

That nothing in life comes for free .

As I am given a gift I feel the ache of my heart missing

Others don’t see I am not whole , that I have pieces that were taken from me that can never be returned

I feel as of now I am immune to the charade these givers play

The what-if eats me alive until there’s nothing left but a disfigured form of what I once was

The torment I put myself through turns me into an unstable hideous creature

I can’t make up my mind on what to do with my life, what my next move should be, not even if I should get up or stay lying rotting

Turning my thoughts over and over

Every possibility, every problem, every second, played out in my head

Trying to predict what’s next

Can the monster that I turned myself into ever be free of my torment?

Or

I see death heading toward this world, telling us it's our time

Death tells us that history repeats itself and this time is no different

I see people turn away from his claim but our time is up my love

The world is ending so please hold my hand till the very last moment and don’t let go

Let’s reincarnate together into our next life

Let’s move on from this world into a better one

The world is ending the scientist told us on the news and nobody listened

There are only limited kisses now

Only so many days left to create memories together

I wonder if when you speak my name are you reminded of my lips gently kissing yours?

Does hearing my name make you feel lonely?

Do your hands feel cold now that I am not there to warm them?

I gave everything I could to keep you warm

However, I need warmth too

I am reminded of you in everything I see

It’s a curse and a blessing that I wish to be free of

There’s only so much I can give but you need so much more