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@celerytoast
Please look at the contestants for the upcoming season of The Bachelor and laugh with me.
Show us your cloning lab, The Bachelor.
Omg
āWhich Lauren are you again? Are you Jenny or Jenna? Oh Maquel. Iāll remember you because of your non-typical white girl name.ā
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The other day I was out eating with a couple people including my vegan friend. Someone had an apple pie or whatever and vegan friend saysĀ āI love apples but I donāt like the skin, I only eat the meat of it.ā And the others of us kind of look at each other likeĀ ādid she really just say thatā but no one said anything. What an ironic phrase
Made my own Rachel Amber earring with a feather I found at the fackinā thrift store. Forget paying fifteen dollars for quality work on Etsy!
Me: Iām going to start working on losing some of this extra weight
Me two hours later at ihop: *eats $25 worth of food by myself*
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Unpopular opinion: Not giving a shit if someone has theĀ ālive laugh loveā saying in their house.
Unpopular opinion: Putting the toilet paper on whichever way you happen to pick it up
Okay but really, Iām still mad that your dad isnāt the final gym leader in Ruby and Sapphire
Try to sayĀ āwhatā without it sounding like a question.Ā
The sad thing is that Logan Paul would have never done his million dollar pledge if he hadnāt been so burnt for the Japan video. He hasnāt changed.
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Sometimes my mind goes blank and then suddenly starts thinkingĀ āoh no. What if I die tomorrow? Think of all the moments with my family Iāll miss and all the new video games and movies and books that Iāll miss out onā and its depressing. So whenever that happens I remind myself to live for each moment because who knows what could happen. Just a reminder to anyone who happens to see this: no matter how life is treating you just remember that you could be gone in an instant. I encourage you to live life to the fullest you are able.
Crows are scary They
use tools
Can be taught to speak (like parrots)
Have huge brains for birds
like seriously their brain-to-body size ratio is equal to that of a chimpanzee
They vocalize anger, sadness, or happiness in response to things
they are scary smart at solving puzzles
some crows stay with their mates until one of them dies
they can remember faces
SIDENOTE HERE BECAUSE HOLY SHIT.Ā They did an experiment where these guys wore masks and some of them fucked with crows.Ā Pretty soon the crows recognized the masks = douchebag.Ā But the nice guys with masks they left alone.Ā THEN, OH WEāRE NOT DONE, NO SIR crows that WERENāT EVEN IN THE EXPERIMENT AND NEVER SAW THE MASK BEFORE knew about mask-dudes and attacked them on sight.Ā THEY PASSED ON THE FUCKING INFORMATION TO THEIR CROW BUDDIES.
They remember places where crows were killed by farmers and change their migration patterns.
Guys Iām really scared of crows now. (q)Ā
Yeah but have you seen thisĀ
A colleague of my dadās lives next to a lake, and looked out the window one morning to see a duck trapped in the ice. A crow swooped down. āOh hell,ā she thought, expecting carnage, because crows are opportunists. But the crow chipped at the ice with its beak until the duck was free.
Idk of this counts but a few crows saved me from a magpie swooping attack once ,theyāre bros who can tell when magpies are being unreasonable and need to chill
I love crows so damn much. When I was fifteen, I hit a pretty serious bout of depression, to the point I was in my room for months. Well, a family of crows made a nest in a tree outside my window. There were two parents and two chicks. One chick was healthy and strong. One was weak, and had a caw like something being strained. It sounded more like a rooster crowing and so my parents jokingly named him āBuckā.Wellā¦ months passed and Buckās sibling was taught to fly. His parents focused on the sibling because the sibling was strong. The father stayed behind to try and teach Buck, but I saw him try to fly, fail, and crash to the floor. His father helped him back up into the tree.
Every day, I would watch Buck from my window until one day I opened it and started talking to him. He was small and gangly and he couldnāt caw right. His feathers were all over the place and I felt a kinship. So I made a deal with him. I told him that if he could do it, if he could fly, then I could find the strength to get up. Wellā¦ near the end of the season, after talking with him every day, I finally saw him get out of the nest. He went to the edge of his branch, braced himself, and jumpedā¦ and just before he hit the ground, he soaredĀ back up into the sky. I cheered harder than I ever had before.
That winter, Buck left the area. I was crestfallen. I felt like Iād lost a friend. But I was so damn proud of him.Ā
Cut to the next spring? Iām walking up the driveway one day when suddenly I hear a soundā¦ a broken caw. I look up, and Buck is sitting in a tree above my head. He stared at me and puffed his feathers, then hopped down in front of me and cawed again. I was so damn thrilled, and I told him how proud I was of him. He ruffled his feathers and then soared off into his old tree.Ā
That summer? I heard two broken caws. One from Buckā¦ and one from his chick.
Cut to ten years later? We have a family of crows who all have a very distinct caw and they come here and spend every spring, summer, and fall on our property. Buck still greets me every spring.
that last reply made me wanna cry. thatās so beautiful.
Donāt forget the Russian Crow SLEDDING DOWN A ROOF not once, but twice.Ā
this one morning i kept hearing really loud caws, i remember it was like 5am, LIKE REALLY LOUD AND ANNOYING AND AGGRESSIVE, so loud that i could hear it through a closed window, and i eventually went outside to check it out. there was a crow on my front lawn, it had an injury on its head and couldnāt fly and there were two other crows circling right above it, and they were cawing like mad.Ā
i tried to get close and take a better look and one of them dived super low and tried to attack me. so i went back in the house and chopped some sliced raw meat and tossed it at him from a distance.
a few more times later, very soon after, they could tell i was trying to help, and did not attack me. i was āallowedā to walk up close and pick him up, he couldnāt drink water properly so i had to dip my finger in a bowl and stick it in his mouth.
i did this few times a day and it went on for about a week before he disappeared, i thought he recovered and left, but he came back the next day and lands on me, and i see him around the block quite often, and he would come sit on my shoulder for a few minutes and then fly away again. i feel like iāve adopted a son.
Best birbs !!
your son is Beautiful and Strong
every time I see this post it has different crow stories and every time I reblog it again because all crow stories are good stories
Like, I wouldnāt want to be on bad terms with a crow, but they are a really smart animal, they arenāt scary You just want to be nice to them because they will know and they will remember, and they will pay you back if you treat them a certain way.
As a side note, I volunteered at a rehab (Hope for Wildlife), where they were rehabbing a crow with a broken wingāwho was named Russell Crow. He kept pulling his bandage off so a sleeve was cut off some old clothing and put on him like a little sweater.Ā
!!!!
I donāt think Iāll ever not reblog this. This posts makes me cry and smile at the same time.
@jewishmagpie
CROWS ARE AMAZING @thefingerfuckingfemalefury
THEY ARE GOOD BIRBS :D
As much as I enjoy āPlanet of the Apesā Iād bet anything that if the Apes didnāt make it, the crows would evolve to take over right after them.
A Planet of the Crows would be a utopia <3
Whenever I go to a big store (like Walmart) where birbs are aplenty in the parking lot, I always bring a little pouch of peanuts or sunflower seeds to toss out to the crows that scavenge there. After about two weeks of doing this pretty routinely, I have a small gathering of crows that will follow me almost up to the doors. I was at Walmart several days ago and the group gathered as usual and I toss out seeds for everyone. The biggest guy hopped forward and laid a shiny quarter at my feet. It was great! I had heard about crows bringing gifts to people that have helped or cared for them and I couldnāt believe I was finally getting one. I always hear people saying how gross and scary crows are and I just donāt see it. Theyāre actually very kindly birbs and take care of each other pretty fiercely. We could learn a lesson from them.
Heyy guess what I madeā¦
This is a survey for anybody on the ace spectrum!
The purpose of the survey is mostly to disprove the misconceptions about the ace community that are unfortunately ripe, and also to help me (and others) get to know our community a little better
@acewlws @asexual-society @a-spec-tacular @a-spectrum-positivity @acemlm @herefortheace
Any chance you guys could help spread this?
how to silence your bigot relatives on thanksgiving
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So do you think that when potatoes look at themselves in the mirror they thinkĀ āwow I look like a freakin humanā
