she knows the end

"Mm, yeah, you do got big feet," Stradlin kept looking down, revelling in being a little freak just for the sake of it. No wonder they considered Two-Bit their blood brother, they were definitely cut from the same cloth. Everyone knew the Lisbons were aliens, obviously, but there was no way they didn't know what onlyfans was considering rumour had it that one of them had been a stripper once upon a time. Not that they were allowed to talk about it according to stern directives from Diego, as much as Strad wanted to. They smirked at Cecily and gave a short, sarcastic nod, tucking that little tidbit away for later because thinking about her looking at that kind of stuff at a family event was dangerous behaviour. "Preaching to the choir, baby. Except I maybe went full throttle down the highway to hell when my mom left me for a preacher." They scoffed a laugh at the continued game of innocence, which they figured was a safety net more than anything. "Mind blowing is usually where I land, but I can be surprisingly tender lover with the right inspiration."

"I'd hope so. I'm tall, I can't walk around with little feet." Although she didn't think she'd consider them big, but she was all too aware of Stradlin's wandering gaze to look down. As sure as Cecily was that it wasn't actual fetish of their's it was still distracting, to the point she waved a white flag in tucking her feet underneath her on the couch. "Really?" It didn't surprise her that Stradlin had a religious upbringing as much as it intrigued her, and made her realize she didn't know much about them at all. "Mind blowing. That's a high bar. Tender I can see, I don't think you're as tough as you want to be."

Truthfully Stradlin was only there because Diego had asked and they hadn't been able to think up a lie fast enough. Of course they wanted to see Cecily, but there was always the small elephant in the room of her sister, the one that had fucked it up with Scott. Details didn't matter, their loyalty was bulletproof. Unlike some people's... "Fuckin' gross is what it was. Raw dogged straight into the jar. For real, after this I'm on a solids only diet. Nothing remotely spreadable. Well... almost nothing." They carried on easily, letting assumptions be made on their own, "Apple sauce is noted. We thank you for your feedback. But seriously, I'm like, begging you not to go looking. Talking about it is one thing but I can't have that being your first impression of my corny ass dirty talk."

"I'd be scared I'd get stuck," she said, as it was the first thought that popped into her head, then looked to Stradlin with a grin. What they were insinuating wasn't totally lost on her but Cecily kept it moving just as easily as they did, not because she was particularly smooth but because she didn't know if it was flirting or aimed at her or even the sort of thing she was supposed to respond to. "Oh I wouldn't know where to look," she feigned innocence, playing it up in a way where Stradlin could hopefully tell she was full of it. "Plus, dormant religious guilt, I think I'm physically incapable of putting that into a search bar. What do you want my first impression to be?"

"That's really fucking funny to hear, you don't even know the half of it. I got reckless when I got angry. That's how I landed in group in the first place, court ordered after I got myself caught up in some stupid shit." Benitez held up an 'okay' sign with his hand, "You'll want to take up my offer one of these days…mark my words, you know I'm always right. I don't think Lisbons got it in them to pine so we're on the same page. Crushes can be fun, they can be fucking torture too but it's looking like you're steering clear of that vibe. Smart woman."

Eyes narrowed, she studied him a moment, "Hm reckless maybe I could see. Otherwise I'd say it's working." Nova could be reckless too but she supposed they all were, in their own ways, and her and Benitez only made more and more sense as she got to know him better. "Not on this but you are usually- right, I mean. It's really annoying. I don't think so either. You make us sound so tough in your head," she teased, "The Lisbons who date greasers and don't yearn."

"Yeah I get that. I have or…had always will have to some degree I guess anger issues. I had to go to this like court appointed group therapy, got on my fuckin' nerves but I met my best friends there and it helped obviously I'm the chill guy you see in front of you today." He grinned, people need different tools to handle their shit." He rolled his eyes, sometimes he could see parts of the Lisbon sisters in others, and just then Benitez had seen the second oldest one, the rigid one, Marina - it made him laugh, "I ain't tellin' you to clam dive or nothing, you used the excuse you wouldn't have privacy to hang so I offered a solution. Stradlin, whoever, if it's something you want to explore then where there's a will there's a way. Are not on that anymore? No shame in losing interest, it happens."

"I can't picture you angry," she said thoughtfully, a sign that whatever he was doing was clearly working. "Leave it to you to make friends in therapy though." And she supposed his therapy experience was a lot different than her's, since she tried group once and couldn't imagine going back, let alone hanging out with the people she'd met there. "I'll figure something out but thanks, for offering. No I am, I just needed to be annoying about it for a second. I'm not sitting here pining over them or anything though, it's just a crush."

For a moment Benitez thought she was going to tell him that no, she'd never made out with anyone. It felt like another level of friendship they were crossing over into and without any real fanfare - she just deemed him safe enough to divulge that to him and he would receive it, "Hmmm yeah alright. With what I know about your folks, C, you get all the grace in the world for that. I'm sorry it fucked up what you had going though. Do you ever find yourself back in that place? Debilitatingly depressed? In any case, if it's what you want? To get back on the horse with Stradlin, I'd let you use my place to watch a movie spy free. I'll take Nova out for a few hours and the place is all yours."

With time she'd come to trust Benitez so much that sharing a major personal part of herself didn't feel like a confession, instead it was just something that'd help him understand her a little a better. "Um sometimes. It's not anything like it used to be, and I've felt it my whole life really but I'm on stuff for that now." She could be honest in admitting that she still felt down sometimes but she was a thousand times better than she had been. Cecily shot him a look, lips twitching up in a moment of levity, "I'm not treating your apartment like it's a motel. And besides, I've never even explicitly said I'm into Stradlin." Because they both knew she didn't need to say anything but she digressed. "You're the one pushing a narrative."

"With a fuckin''B'. I'm a fuckin' dealer and I couldn't tell you how many times I've gotten free weed from bro, he likes to pass that shit out like candy. Or at least he used to I haven't seen him in a while, but I also haven't been looking." Benitez would have been shocked if Cecily told him that she wasn't a virgin, but her being as innocent as she looked wasn't surprising at all. "Okay you've never hooked up but I mean you've made out with girls before right?"

"Shout out to Bridget," she chuckled, echoing what he'd said earlier. Make out was perhaps too strong of a word for what Cecily had done but she'd kissed a few girls before- and a handful of boys, but she quickly decided that wasn't for her. "Yeah but only more recently. And I had a friend, when I was younger- typical I know, and that was just once." She pushed that feeling down as far as it'd go, scared of what might happen if her parents ever found out, and then she lost that friend — not even because of what they'd done but because Cecily was so pervasively sad around that time, she was a bummer to be around. "I was.. depressed for a really long time, like debilitatingly almost, so. I was pretty busy with that."

"Tate? Tate T--is he a huge pot head but weirdly buff for a guy whose a huge pot head? I only know of 1 dude named Tate he's like the son of a billionaire so if it's the same guy then shout out to Bridget and who you calling goofy?" He asked faux offended as he grabbed a couch pillow and whacked Cecily in the face one good time with it." The movie really was that good, maybe even one of his all time favorites (he did love a good mob movie), he laughed at her summation, "Yeah, I don't know shit about being a lesbian but I feel like that's some of the better sex scenes, didn't feel like soft core porn. Yo, you know what? You should asked Stradlin to watch a movie with you, casual you know? I remember Ainsley telling me plenty of times that she couldn't quantify how many of her hook ups happened while watching The L Word with a girl. Yeah I can see it - make your room all cozy so you've got to be in close proximity and chemistry does the rest."

"Probably, I don't want to make assumptions- billionaire?" Cut off by a pillow to the face, she laughed and immediately hurled it back at him. If Bridget was dating some billionaire's stoner son then yeah good on her. "Hey I don't know shit about it either, not firsthand anyway." Getting her firsthand experience seemed to be where Benitez's mind was headed, and she eyed him warily. Her innocence was only a byproduct of her sheltered upbringing, as she had no problem talking about sex so long as it was more of an abstract concept. It was sharing her own desire for it that she was still warming up to. "So a couple issues with that... I'm not inviting Stradlin over, not with so many sisters who like to eavesdrop. And I don't know, I've obviously never.. hooked up with anyone."

"Yeah, I'd probably do the same thing, just ride the wave. A vacation is a vacation, right?" Benitez didn't push Cecily to smoke but always offered, sometimes she accepted, sometimes she didn't but when she did, she was even more hilarious than usual, "Hey you're getting better at that." He added as he took the pen and flipped it between his fingers, "I didn't know Bridget was seeing a guy, she's tight lipped as hell. He cool though? What do you know about him?" The longer he dated Nova, the more invested Benitez became in the Lisbon ecosystem though he was just an observer more than anything. He was sure Nova probably mentioned it in passing but since it was only in passing he didn't think it was anything too official. He grinned even wider as his point was once again proven, "Nah, nice try a rough neck is a rough neck, gender don't have nothin' to do with it. Alright enough talking, let's watch this fuckin' movie." He said and pressed play, thoroughly enjoying the movie all the way through, "What did you think, I think it might actually be a goated movie."

She shot him a little satisfied grin at his comment, totally past the point of ever trying to play it cool with him. "I mean I don't know, last I checked she was. It might be casual, or even over by now, but it seems like she likes him. His name is Tate, I don't know much but he's not greaser affiliated, and he's kind of goofy from what I've seen, but so are you. Maybe there is a type." Despite being part of the Lisbon ecosystem herself, Cecily felt like more of an observer sometimes too but she didn't feel like it was necessarily a bad thing. As the youngest, she spent her whole life looking up to her sisters, picking up on each of their individual quirks, noticing habits of their's. She liked sharing some of her findings with Benitez, someone outside the Lisbon echo chamber. "Okay, okay." She sunk back into the couch as he started the movie, barely moving an inch through the entire runtime. "That was really good," she agreed once the movie was over, and sat up a bit. "It almost feels like.. they're in a maze, with the way all the rooms are shot. And yeah it's really hot too but I needed to say something smart first."

"And how do you feel about that? Do you like it or do you wish you were there from the early conceptual shit?" He asked while silently offering her the pen to hit. He repeated after her with a slow, careful "Doseogwan", grinning pleased with his pronunciation even if it was most likely bad. He grinned even bigger at the phrase she settled on, "Fuck yeah to that, C. Those are the magic words right there, that's why you're the homie." He shrugged, "Hey, I am just naturally always correct, I don't know what to tell you. I'm just born this way. This one though, not that hard to figure out. You Lisbon women do like your rough necks. Exhibit A." He motioned to himself, "I'm only greaser affiliated, some days I'm almost surprised I made the cut...almost."

She pursed her lips a second then shrugged, "There's too many opinions as is- that's why we're almost through June and don't have a summer vacation planned yet. I'd rather do the later decision making, and let the others narrow it down first." Realizing he'd extended his pen towards her, and wasn't just waving it around, she hesitated a moment then took it, hitting it how he'd showed her to before. "I thought you'd like that one," she said in an exhale, proud herself for not coughing (okay, barely coughing), and passed the pen back to Benitez. "Greaser affiliated, greaser adjacent, it all counts. It's really just you and Diego though, Bridget's boyfriend, or boy she's seeing, is just some guy and Tessa...," she stopped that thought as she realized it wasn't helping her case. "It's different for me, I don't like men. You can't just lump me in with everyone else."

"I'd tell you but then I'd have to kill you, those are state secrets, Lisbon." Benitez told her with a deadly serious look then grinned at her. "What? They tell you based on age or something? Shit I'm so glad I'm the only child in that case. Tell me some shit in Korean, something cool too not like where is the library or something." It was true he didn't have any siblings of his own, but he did enjoy being something of a defacto older brother figure to her even if he thought of Cecily as a friend, there were those brotherly feelings by virtue of her being younger and more in her shell. "Yeah, Ainsley and me have had many many….many discussions about movie tropes especially in queer films and the number 1 is 'bury your gays' aka sad shit. "Yeah, that's her. Hell of a woman, right. But I guess the other one is more your taste, right? Her lips are A1."

"Sometimes. I'm usually brought in when there's at least an idea of a plan, not in the early conceptual stages." The phrase at the tip of her tongue wasn't very cool and so she frowned, reaching in her brain a second for something that wasn't about a library or bathroom. "Library is doseogwan- oh, you'll like this one- sanggwanhaji ma. That's 'it's none of your business'." Benitez was her friend of course but he teased her the way she assumed an older brother would, and sure, she looked up to him a little too, even if she'd never let him know as much. "Oh yeah I know about that one. Like probably." Eyes still on the movie thumbnail, she looked between the two women and bit back a grin, then side-eyed Benitez. "Can you stop making correct assumptions about me?"

"You got anything you want to do this summer? Like a goal or shit? Nova is full speed ahead on a trip like a long weekend thing or something before you guys take your Lisbon retreat or whatever." Benitez said, half slouched on his couch, one leg over it's arm as he looked for another movie for the two of them to watch. He'd seen a lot of lesbian movies in his time thanks to similar movie marathons with Ainsley, "What are you in the mood for this go round? Like some artsy shit? Some sad shit…there's lots of sad shit, funny shit." He landed on 'Bound' and sat up, "Oh! This one right here is my favorite, this is some gangster shit. And one of the leads? I've been in love with her since the bride of Chucky. If you don't like this one I don't know if we can be friends anymore." He added before he took a hit of his weed pen, opting for that instead of a blunt so Cecily didn't come back home smelling like a dispensary, he didn't want that smoke from the Lisbon sisters."

"Not really, why, what are Nova's summer goals?," she asked teasingly, knowing it was something that'd surely stemmed from her sister. "I don't know about a Lisbon retreat, I'm usually looped in on those last. I have been working on my Korean though, if we're doing that again." There were so many movies Cecily missed in her upbringing, and she spent a lot of their first few years away from their parents playing culture catch up, holed up in her room with a book or album that apparently everyone knew but her. Lesbian movies were a newer concept to her, and she still didn't see why Benitez knew so many, but she appreciated the education regardless. "It's always sad- oh, sure. I trust your taste. Bride of Chucky, is she on the left, red lipstick?"

"What, you don't think I'm a worthy cause?" Stradlin held Cecily's gaze for a long moment, then flicked her eyes down to her feet. What else was a shithead like her supposed to do with a challenge like that? "I'm sure you got nice ones but, ah, that's not my thing. And for you? It'd be on the house anyways."

She narrowed her eyes, as that was definitely not what she'd meant. "I never said that. I think you should milk them for all they've got." They were at one of the infamous Lisbon-Cruz functions, which were rarer now that it was just Diego dating one of her sisters but he still insisted Marina bring as many of them with her that wanted to come. Cecily may or may not have tagged along in hopes she'd see Stradlin. "Oh thank you, you shouldn't," she joked back, sarcastic, then laughed. "So.. peanut butter, is that just spread on a plate or foot fully in the jar? What's next, apple sauce?"

"Peanut butter," Stradlin blurted out with zero hesitation. They had no shame in the matter, money was money and getting it from some weirdo on the internet was like taking candy from a baby. "Working at Damo's club is alright but I'm not trying to spend the rest of my life just scraping by, you know? You look like you got nice feet, maybe we should team up sometime."

She pulled a face not out of disgust this time but surprise, mostly at their quick reply, then laughed. "I'm not judging you," she clarified. "Just the golden retriever who's paying you apparently. Don't look at my feet," she warned, even knowing it'd only present a challenge to someone like Stradlin, as she stared them down.

"Crazy how my entire ability to pay rent is dependent on some guy who likes watching me stand on food," Stradlin was checking their bank balance, grateful that they'd made it by the skin of their teeth to pay their rent. "This week was mashed potato. Only con is that I'm never gonna eat that shit again."

Cecily's nose scrunched up as she made sense of what they'd just said, a slightly delayed reaction on her part. Not even because she was sheltered but because she couldn't comprehend mashed potatoes being in a sexual context, ever. "Ew. What was last week's, do I want to know?"

"Fuck this jumpscare shit–" Stradlin had reeled backwards, if only for the safety of the person who had popped out of nowhere beside her. The Addams house was like a labyrinth in the dark so she wouldn't have been surprised if there were secret passages in the walls too. "You're lucky I'm a lover not a fighter or I'd have knocked your fuckin' head off." Not that she was a violent person anyway; despite her found family being comprised mostly of Greasers she wasn't one herself, though Soda had given her enough lessons on throwing punches that she could if she wanted to.

The quietest Lisbon, she wasn't really one to announce her presence. And she never intended to sneak up on anyone but she'd accidentally made a habit of it- a habit Lip insisted, time and time again, that she kick. Cecily mouthed an apology as Stradlin nearly knocked her over and bit back a smile, concealing the bit of amused satisfaction she got from their reaction. "We should stop meeting like this." She let herself smile then and took a step back. "You're not scared of the dark, are you."

Lip's side eye was scalding enough that he didn't need to speak on how Cecily's nonchalance had him in a state of near offended disbelief. Considering he could talk underwater if he wanted to it was actually quite impressive how much they could share without saying anything at all. "See, this is why you're my smart friend!" he fished his phone out of his pocket and murmured as he typed her idea into his bio. "Not gonna lie it's so boring matching with people who won't let me stay over to cuddle. This halloween is my last stand so I hope the men of Rosewood are listening!" he raised his voice a little, looking around as if he were talking to anyone within earshot. "My parents work abroad so maybe I'll make like a migratory bird and winter with them. Unless you'd miss me too much. I'd stay if you couldn't bear it, obviously."

She raised a brow back at him, engaging in an entirely silent exchange with him in just their facial expressions. Seeing as he'd never been subtle a day in his life, Cecily didn't even hide the way she looked over his shoulder as he pulled his phone out. "What's your costume idea?," she asked, unsure how to respond to that other part. "I think you should stay here, because I'd miss you plus- Once it gets colder you might have better luck with that cuddling thing."