Randomness and Ramblings

Forgot how beautiful this is, dedicated to someone I thought (and maybe deep down still think) was gonna be part of my life forever

Freaking awesome cover of one of my favourite tunes, all I need is a glass of red wine and to be in a dark and smokey little jazz bar somewhere

Hi mummy, well Jude and I did it, we ran as fast as we could, we walked and walked and I carried him for the final mile, but we did it. Your grandson, your daughter and her Disney Girls (and exercise phobics) crossed the finish line. We helped raise money, so nobody else will have to suffer the way you did, and so families never again have to deal with the loss and grief that I went through when you said goodbye to me. Be proud of us mummy, be proud of your grandson who carried his message of love on his back for you, and who looked at your photo when we came back home and said 'this is for you grandma as he wore his medal round his neck. It's his pride and joy for 'winning the race' But he wants to share it with you. I thought about you all the way round, I miss you so much, I wish you could be here for that one last cuddle, to help raise my beautiful little boy, but I know ur here in spirit. I love you

Feeling a bit down today but along comes this and my day is well and truly made!!! I love you Bill!!!!

I have one cheeky ass child!!!

this is me. Woman, wife, mother, Lover and Friend. Having a child hasn't changed who I am, but enhanced it. Closer to 40 than 30 but so much more confident in myself than I ever have been before. I can be the best friend you will ever have, and ur worst enemy if you were ever to hurt me. My shoulder is here for u to cry on, my ears are here to listen and my heart is yours to give u comfort. I can be naughty, I can be nice, hell I can be downright dirty when I want to be but most of all I am loyal. This is me

That moment when your favourite tune comes on!

Catch up with the sexy exy, super proud of u mister, not so proud of the inevitable hangover that awaits

Dragnerves pretty amazing Heavy Metal cover of the Transformers theme. Featuring Judes lovely God daddy on drums

Pooltime with my baby

That vain moment when you take 20 selfies to find just one…

So so beautiful

HOLY CRAP THEY MADE A LIVE ACTION VERSION!!!! SQUUEEEAAALLL!!! Excited doesn't cover it!

Well I had that dream again. A dream that haunts my every waking moment, a dream that can reduce me to tears in seconds. Maybe she's sending me a message. For nearly a month now I have been having the same dream. There is a knock on my door and I go running to answer it, as the door opens I see my mum full of life and her luggage right beside her. she looks at me before saying "I'm so sorry baby but I had to go away for a while, but I'm back now please forgive me" It seems so real, im looking at her a mix of joy and anger and she stands there just staring at me, as I go to hug her she vanishes and I wake up..alone. I spend an hour looking at the ceiling crying uncontrollably coz for a brief second she was here, in my arms and for that brief second I felt safe again I felt a love like never before and in an instant it's gone. I miss you so much mama.

Conversation with the hubby this evening after a kiss: Me: Eww you taste like cigarettes Nick: what are u complaining about u suck on my *beep* when I've been smoking.... Me: where the hell have u been sticking that cigarette!???