𝖆𝖎𝖙𝖍𝖊𝖗𝖎𝖔𝖘

  - phase I; shock and numbness -

Time becomes a finite measure only when your days are set.

Others at your age are going out, exploring their futures, just setting foot into an unknown world and you? Get the better half of 1 year thrown at your feet and told, “here make what you will of it”

But how can you?

The words of the doctor echoes in your head, rattling your thoughts and making them dance about until nothing is coherent anymore.

It feels empty.

Like everything has lost its colour, its flavour.

But when he hugs you,

when he lets you cry it out on his shoulder,

when he cups your face and leaves a sweet kiss on your lips and whispers to you,

“my love, I'm here, I'll give you the best life”,

you can’t help but feel a miniscule tinge better.

That the love of your life, will remain a constant until the very end.

akaashi keiji, you’re one hell of a guy

The next day, he springs a surprise trip to Greece.

You could hardly believe the words as they left his lips.

“pack what you need, we leave at the end of the week”

“I’ve already called ahead to your work, you don’t have to worry about that”

And that’s how a week later you found yourselves on the windswept limestone cliffs of Santorini, gazing upon the tops of the notable blue and white architecture.

In the midst of the white-washed buildings, casted golden by the setting sun, Keiji tightens his grip on your hand.

A silent promise.

One that you treasure closest to your heart as the sun disappears beneath the horizon, bringing the day to a close.

 at the end, doesn’t everyone just want closure ?

 - phase ii; yearning and searching -

It's that time of the year where everything starts shriveling up and dying as the temperature takes a dip for the lower end of the thermostat.

And before you know it, you too will shrivel up and die

it’s a never leaving trail of negativity; one that only festers and broils as the autumn leaves scatter at the touch of the cold breeze.

That day, Keiji brings home a new beanie and shoves it snugly over your head, tightly bundling your hair until it frays out. He lets out a low chuckle.

You pout at him, attempting to uncover your eyes so you can see him properly and get your hair in place, when all you see are two plane tickets to Ontario.

He smiles softly at you, watching at your expression.

You meet his gaze quietly, staring into his eyes.

His eyes that hold hope for you.

You both know by now that the prospect of extending your deadline is out of the question. You’ve taken more sick days and the monthly reviews have slowly transitioned into fortnightly ones.

Yet he holds so much emotion for you, so many wishes that you will be happy, with him. Even until the very end.

You grasp his hand, in which he holds the tickets.

“when do we leave?”

The mist rising from the falls breaks the sunlight and forms a slender arc of a rainbow above the crest of the waterfall.

Against the backdrop of the hues of orange, red and yellow, the colours of autumn have never looked more stunning.

The two of you stand there, at the outlook over the edge of the falls, watching the miniscule silhouettes of other tourists on board the boats as they view Niagara Falls from a different perspective.

Maybe it’s about the perspective.

Maybe it’s not that you have less than a year left.

Maybe it’s that you have the rest of the year to love Keiji.

That you have the rest of the year to get your forever with him.

As you link hands and slowly tread through the park, leaves crunching at your feet, he suddenly stops.

“my love, can i get a picture of you?”

As much as he’d never forget your smile, he thought to himself, if he could capture even a shred of your beauty, he’d be forever thankful.

As you stood there, amidst the falling leaves, adjusting your beanie, he thinks you’ve never looked more gorgeous.

 and as we stand here together, in this instant, it’s as if time is standing still, bearing witness to our love

 - phase iii; disorganisation and despair -

 The beauty of a small island in the middle of winter, covered by blankets of glistening white snow.

A fleeting moment, where the frosty wind nips at your cheeks as the ferry slows to a halt, docking at the jetty.

Clasping your gloved hand in his, he gently leads the way, weaving through the crowd.

As you set foot on the ground and take in the view, you realise that no image on google can compare to seeing it in real life.

In days gone by, you fawned over the picturesque landscape and imagery of Nami Island in South Korea.

Especially in the heart of winter, where many others have taken their own recreations of photos out of a K-drama.

“keiji, baby look- “,

As you would show him a sample image of a wedding photoshoot, the couple staring lovingly in each other’s eyes with the tall Maple trees bearing witness to their love.

The same tall Maple trees that you and him now stand before.

In the subtle shadows, casted by the barren trees, he graces your lips with a kiss.

Which turned into another.

And another.

Before he pulls back slightly, leaning his forehead against yours, eyes closed, just basking in each other’s company.

Softly swaying with the cold wind, he pulls something out of his pocket.

That in which he links around your neck.

When you lean back and look down at your collar, there sits a simple but elegant rose gold chain, to which a pendant is attached to.

And on the pendant, is your anniversary date.

The day that you said yes to being his best friend, his confidante, the love of his life.

Suddenly, you feel very warm.

Your face heats up and tears fall from your eyes before you even notice it.

“keiji, I’m sorry.”

“what for, baby?”

“i’m sorry for whatever’s going to happen after.”

 fate fortold that we would meet, so now my love, what’s the rush?

 - phase iv; reorganisation and recovery -

 The cold winds have blown, now the warm days are returning.

Looking out the window, the green fields rush past as the Shinkansen speedily heads for Sapporo.

Clenching your fingers tighter, you look down at where Keiji’s fingers hold on to yours just as tightly.

One last time.

Slowly but surely, strolling down the pathway, watching as high school couples bask in the bright glow of the pink hues of this season.

It seemed like a lifetime ago that you and Keiji linked arms and sat under the cherry blossoms.

Youth.

As you both sat on the bench, his arms tightly wound across your shoulder, he recalls how all those years ago, as he wiped the corner of your mouth of cream from the daifuku you were eating, he first told you those three words.

“i love you.”

“until forever and the day after that”

He pulls out his phone, your ever-beautiful face smiling back at him from under those autumn leaves in Canada.

The bench beside him has never felt emptier as he places one hand over his chest, the cold metal of the pendant pressing painfully against his heart.

It’s been a year.

A flower bud drops on his shoulder.

He remembers your expressions, the amazement you gave the first time you saw him do a snow angel, the contentment when he had kissed you under the maple trees. The love in your eyes that never wavered a single time.

He closes his eyes and takes a deep breath in, before shakily letting it out.

I miss you.

 even when the seasons change, our love will forever remain the same.

>  he gently taps your forehead, "wake up sleepy head, don't fall asleep on me now" he coos softly as you lift your drowsy half-lidded eyes to meet his. he's teasing but he lets you doze off for a few hours while he does his work, before he shakes you awake at 5am.

>  both of you leave the house a little late because he couldn't resist your "5 more minutes" that became 20 more, partly because it felt way too comfortable

>  he realises you both would miss the sunrise if you missed this specific tram that was arriving in 15 minutes and you two were still a fair distance away from the tram stop

>  tugging on your hand, both of you began running as fast as you can. you stopped halfway, dying for air and completely winded while iwa just smiles angelically, looking absolutely perfect and fine.

>  "come on babe we're almost there" "LMFAO just *inhale* leavE *another inhale* ME i just can’t *final inhale* go oN WITHOUT ME"

>  he laughs at your overdramatic reaction, pulling you into a loose hug. "hurry, let's go dumbass, or we won't be able to catch the sunrise" as he slips his hand back into yours, both of you manage to catch the tram in time and he pats your head, praising you for doing so well

>  finally you arrive at the empty beach, barely in time for the sunrise. immediately, you toss your shoes and socks to the side before running straight towards the ocean, waiting for him right before the water

>  iwa's not far behind as he discards his own shoes, shoving his phone back into his pockets, joining you in the ocean we know this man be taking sneaky shots of you and the sunrise to feed his photo gallery and then hide it in the the hidden section so you wouldn’t find it

>  you squeal as the freezing cold water touches your feet, running back a few steps. but he doesn't move at all, let alone making a sound

>  you gape at him like ??? this man literally be immune to everything and here you are with feet turning RED and numb, the epitome of 👁👄👁 ➖👄➖ 👁👄👁

>  as you run along the shoreline in the waves, often you stomp hard just so you could purposely splash iwa who's running behind you. you burst out in peals of laughter when you hear him laugh, chasing and yelling at you to come back

>  you spend an hour on the beach picking pretty seashells and cuddling before heading back. i just KNOW this man would have a towel in his pocket so he can dry your feet off for you like... do i even need to say more?

>  grabbing some breakfast along the way, you two collapse back on the bed after taking a quick shower together. snuggling with your head in the crook of his neck, you both drift off to sleep, but not without the tiny kisses and soft murmuring of "i love you"s i want an iwa please i'm manifesting brb

↬ kuroo tetsurou

(for those two idiots again @lluon​ and starling <3) 

￫ location: pier 

￫ song: think of me - olivia lunny

>  you two often hop onto any train out of the city in a direction you’ve never gone before, making sure to leave with enough cash and fully charged phones just in case anything happens

>  reaching the train station at night, he slings his arm around your shoulders as you both ponder right in front of the map, staring hard, unable to choose. just then, kuroo spots the last train of the day coming into a platform you both have never been on.

>  you follow his gaze as he tugs on your hand and you both make a mad dash into the train, huffing and out of breath just as the doors closes shut with a soft thud. finding yourselves in an empty cabin, you both burst out in laughter at how close your hair almost got caught between the train doors

>  resting your head on his shoulders as he pulls you securely into his arms, kuroo leans beside the train doors, watching the starry night sky and buildings flash past as the train starts speeding up.

>  you two find yourselves near a pier a few hours outside of the city, where you can faintly hear the crashing sounds of the waves on the beach. you two begin walking hand in hand towards the pier, soft conversation and laughter filling the air. 

>  it was time for the sunrise, and the cotton candy clouds slowly appeared on the horizon. you let go of his hand to run towards the furthermost edge of the pier, pulling out your phone to take photos of the beautiful sight.

>  kuroo sneaks a few shots of you in the sunrise, smiling sweetly at how even in pictures he could sense your excitement, before shoving it back into his pocket.

>  he comes up behind you, sliding his hands into the pockets of your jacket, bending down to lean his chin on your shoulder as he switches between staring at the sunrise and at your phone.

>  a sudden gust of strong wind blew by and you almost drop your phone into the sea with a squeak, leaning too far forward to catch it and almost falling in yourself. kuroo snaps you back into his chest, this time taking his hands out and wrapping his arms securely around you

>  “you almost pulled me into the water with you” the image of you pulling kuroo into the water and emerging looking like bedraggled cats popped into your head, and it had you on your knees wheezing as you desperately try to breathe and explain to him what you thought of at the same time.

>  he’s on the verge of tears along with you before he turns you around to face him, placing a kiss on your forehead “ah, what would you do without me, kitten” he teases. snuggling your head into the crook of his neck, you breathe in his warm familiar smell, trying to calm your pounding heart down

>  “i’ll never forget every moment i spend with you, i love you so much” he whispers in your ear

↬ ushijima wakatoshi 

￫ location: rooftop

￫ song: found you - austin mahone

a | n : ok i know i always joke about how ushijima 🧍🏻‍♂️s all the time but you can’t NOT tell me he wouldn’t be the softest boyfie ever !! like- that one picture of ushijima cupping water in his big hands like it’s the most fragile thing he’s ever touched- i would DIE FOR THIS MAN SOMEONE IF YOU FIND IT SEND IT TO ME kYAA I BEG OF YOU

>  you two often stargaze on your rooftop through the night till morning, but always fell asleep, never waking up in time to watch sunrise to appear on the horizon. ushijima would end up cradling you in his arms and going back to your apartment to snuggle into bed

>  this time, you guys were deadset on watching it, setting alarms every 5 minutes in desperation

>  you both cuddle together into the pillows and warm blanket that you brought, along with the mountain of your favourite snacks that ushijima bought for you earlier that day at the supermarket kYAA i love this man

>  slowly you grow bored of staring and trying to figure out constellations, choosing to bury yourself in his arms and start playing animal crossing on your switches. ushijima rests his chin on your shoulder, occasionally glancing between your screen and his own.

>  he's really confused when you get chased by insects and he desperately tries to save you but you run in circles while he tries to catch them with his net HAHA

> ah you both would have such cute islands, probably named after each other and you would water each other's flowers and never harvest one of them just so it says "watered by toshi" or "watered by y/n".

>  definitely the traditional harmonious theme with a big farm for him. this man would be so good at decorating omfg. would gift you flowers and fruits ALL THE TIME and would leave signs like "you are the fertiliser to my soil" ADFJDKS

>  would visit your island being like 🧍🏻‍♂️ JUST KIDDING would watch and follow you around, as you go to fulfil requests for your villagers AAAA would drop you stuff you need or go pick fruits for you <3

>  honestly once you start gaming, your hand unconsciously keeps going into the snacks to nom on, and ushijima has to stop you from overeating. this man would buy you the whole store BUT he would also slap your hand away because he watches for your health

>  you both fall asleep under the stars, this time ushijima actually waking up just in time for the sunrise. sitting up, he softly nudges you awake, pulling you into into his lap “wake up sleep head, we finally got it to see it”

>  hugging you from behind, he kisses and rests his chin on the crown of your head as you open your drowsy eyes, enjoying the cool breeze as you two watch the glow of the sunrise

>  "i love you" he mutters quietly. a man of a few words, but his actions always speak the loudest. and when he says those three words, you know he means it from the deepest depths of his heart.

he deserves the world gtfo my heart

>  you both keep getting shocked by 5 minute interval alarms that keep going off <3 before ushijima literally spikes the entire phone off the building out of annoyance with you screaming in surprise in the bg