Deadloch 2.06
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Deadloch 2.06

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how‘s the water?
you‘re in it
yeah, but i want to know how you like it
I love very specific cakes
I had to redraw this cake 🍰
A companion:
“Irritated fans produce fanfic like irritated oysters produce pearls.”
— Anne Jamison (via pen-in-hand)
Shane fucking Hollander you have captivated me with those heart eyes of yours it's so unfair

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"i asked chat gpt-"
well I asked the Glow Cloud (all hail) and it emitted a low whistleing and dropped a lizard on my head.
I think about this a lot.
may I add also “butt dial” vs “booty call” vs “bottom text”
Hand job vs manual labor
Tags deserved to be seen
There's something sort of funny but also very sad about how so much of the stress of keeping their secret is all down to things Shane and Ilya do early on to distance themselves from even the passing notion that they could be friends.
Shane could have let Scott's comment about "your boy, Rozanoz" slide and say yeah, actually we're really good friends, turns out no one else understands what it's like to have all this pressure and the manufactured rivalry, alone at the top together, etc. I like the guy, we hang out.
Scott (and probably lots of other players) just assumed they'd know each other and bought the way the league was selling them as a package deal. They totally could have taken advantage of that and made being seen together a normal thing from the beginning if all that paranoia wasn't so deeply ingrained, if the fear hadn't been quite so palpable.
Similarly, Ilya could have hung out with Shane in Russia. I know people like to defend his harshness at the arena because of the danger, and sure, there was legitimate danger. But it's obviously normal for players from opposing teams to hang out - Scott and Carter Vaughn can come say hi to Shane and get ice cream and go watch figure skating together and it's normal, even when they have US vs Canada games coming up.
Shane isn't trying to flirt or make a move on Ilya when he goes to check on him, and he doesn't ask anything that would give them away. He's checking on Ilya because he's concerned, offering his condolences on the bad game, etc. Even if the Russian players phones were being monitored in this fictional world, a simple conversation between friends about the competition wouldn't have stood out too badly.
Tbh, Ilya made it more dramatic than it needed to be, brooding on an empty balcony and being extra cryptic. "We are not anything" is a lot more suspicious in my mind than Ilya sitting with his fellow coworkers and watching the skating, or sharing a quick "yeah, the game sucked, talk to you about it later, man" or a simple text (in the real world, if Ilya's phone was truly bugged, the secret would be out anyway because it's not like the gov couldn't find out whose number that was, pseudonym or not, so I assume they weren't actually monitoring Ilya's communications in this 'verse).
It's just crazy how many of the hurdles they have to get over later on are ones they constructed themselves. The rivalry is partly a fun competition for them but also it's a very real barrier they've hidden behind long enough that it builds even the idea of them being friends into a legitimate mountain to climb before they can even think about coming out.
Like sure, the league is already a saw trap for them and would have been hostile regardless, but they make it even harder on themselves without realizing it will be harder to change the narrative later on. And a lot of that is because they're scared and in denial and because they don't think ahead or know any better, but it's also just sad. Because it didn't have to be that hard, and they have no way of knowing until it's almost too late to change it.
who else is up permanently feeling like they did something Wrong

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Christian babies have so far not found a purpose or use outside of baseball
The best way I can describe why you need to watch Farscape is that it's Star Trek for sex freaks. And yes, I hear you out there, saying "umm actually Star Trek is Star Trek for sex freaks" but I am looking you in your eyes when I Assure you that it is not even approaching Farscape's level. "But OP have you seen the episode where-" yes. Yes I have. Farscape's doing it freakier. And sexier. I don't know how it's allowed either.
on another note, watched The Mummy (1999) the other day and I couldn’t help feel like the O’Connells and the Addams (Addams Family Values (1993) would get on really well ya know? The O’Connells are basically the pastel adventure version of the Addams, surely they would just be vibin’ over tea and crumpets in an extremely haunted mansion having a ball of a time
Morticia: “So what is it you do for a living my dear?”
Evelyn: “We dig up dead people who often have monstrous curses placed on them!”
Morticia: “fascinating”
Gomez: *leaping out from behind a pillar which is encrusted with ominous looking runes* en garde!
Rick: *grabs sword from equally ominous looking wall full of weapons one of which seems to be glowing* fantastic I was getting a bit rusty
Gomez: *nearly in tears* oh he’s screaming nonsensically, what spirit! what reslove!
*Rick and Gomez, still frantically sword fighting*
Rick: Have I mentioned how wonderful my wife is yet, I really feel like I haven’t really expanded enough on how wonderful she is
Gomez: do go on, I would be delighted to hear about how wonderful your wife is, I strongly encourge all men to extoll the virtues of their wives with rapturous praise, however I should perhaps mention my wife is in fact better
*sword fighting intensifies as both men rapturously extoll the virtues of their wives*
Jonathan and Fester and Cousin Itt watch from the bar, where Lurch and Thing are making the drinks.
Jonathan and Thing knew one another from The War; each thought the other to be dead
Their reunion is highly emotional
Rick, whilst swordfighting: My wife resurrected an ancient evil that brought about the plagues.
Gomez: What. A. Woman.
This is literally what people are talking about when they say AI will be used to mainstream widely held bigotry. LLMs are trained on frequency and probability -> straight relationships are more well represented in the dataset -> straight pronouns and terms become the "correct" normal.
This is a form of backdoor bigotry from both normative facts (there are more straight than gay relationships) and well represented bigoted beliefs (men are superior to women).
Combine this with the mass of people inclined to believe (and being encouraged to believe) that if AI says and does something it must be correct
toddler shane refusing to talk after his hockey team lose a game. yuna & david are trying to be encouraging like “bud!! you played so good!!” and shane is ignoring them while climbing into his car seat where he’s going to angrily drink his juice box and then chew on the straw.
Couldn't miss the chance

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Joanna with the greatest post-win photo of all time
TASKMASTER SERIES 22 LINEUP REVEALED!
Chloe Petts, Isy Suttie, Matt Lucas, Nina Conti and Richard Ayoade