Have you seen my Doctor?

everybody love me. except for all my haters. who will be dealt with.

Ilya: I like your pants. Shane: Thanks, they were 30% off. Ilya: I’d like them 100% off. Shane: That’s a terrible way to run a business, Ilya. The store would go under if they were just giving their clothes away.

please god let chatgpt die out like nfts did. With a fast and graceless fall into irrelevancy

Like to charge, reblog to cast.

This spell has a very low hit ratio, so we need a lot of us to do it.

Shane at 45 years old, watching some punk-ass rookie on screen beat the All Stars speed record that he's held for over a decade now: Baby, do you think I can come out of retirement for next season?

My absolute gospel truth and I'm sorry this is so sappy but--where I'm living, Ilya fully changes his name to Hollander when they get married, like just fully legally changes it. And despite the fact that he continues to use Rozanov professionally ("Just like J. Lo," Ilya says.) everyone who knows them personally obviously knows what Ilya's legal name is and also assume it's a way to kind of stick it to his shitheel father. To this end, and kind of as a joke at first, people start referring to their two-person unit as The Hollanders ("Okay, the Hollanders are in room 508" etc.) but it becomes steadily less and less a joke when neither Shane or Ilya really seems to think of it as one. Ilya especially seems to genuinely love it. He'll say shit like "Oh yes the Hollanders will be there" when asked if they're coming to a barbecue like they live in a postcard. He LOVES to give his name as Ilya Hollander and he LOVES to book reservations under 'Misters Hollander' and he LOVES to say the words 'Shane and Ilya Hollander' out loud with his mouth. I also think that for their last game together in the league Ilya and Shane wear jerseys that say S. Hollander 24 and I. Hollander 81 and it's like. An end of an era type thing. And they frame the jerseys.

Elliot Page does not play Achilles in The Odyssey like transphobes were preemptively angry about but Homer just told me he updated the Iliad and Achilles is canonically transgender now and not just subtextually transgender like in the first draft.