I didn't program you to love me.

this is the fifth fucking geode ive crakced open whys its all meat

my liege those are crab rangoons

@isuggestrevolution

i suggest self defense

i have a suggestion

just received the best text message I’ve ever had. from my mom

The thing about the moon is maybe you don’t need to write a poem about the moon. The moon’s been done, we’ve discussed it. It’s a coin a mirror an eye a lantern in the darkness. It’s a rock in space. It’s the dang moon we’ve all seen it! Is there something you can notice that’s is more surprising than the moon???

“Would you block someone just for disagreeing with you?” Pal, I’ll block someone for agreeing with me in the wrong tone of voice.

Cannot express how disinterested I am in seeing traumatized characters "reconcile" with their canonically shitty parental figures.

I probably don't have to even say this but this has turned out to be the most "omg Blorbo from my shows" post I could have made. I have no idea who tf 90% of the people in the tags are but you're very passionate about them.

At this point. the internet is for advertisers and nobody else.

i have a suggestion

Mercenaries at the tavern are always laughing at me saying "He hasn't the stones!" and I know they mean balls but sometimes I feel like they mean the powerful elfstones that can grant any wish. And it's like well nobody has those

I've just received some distressing news

just helped an old old man log into his outlook account and we succeeded and he said “young lady, go in peace. we have accomplished this mission.” what an electrifying way of speaking…