ive never been able to take "climb him like a tree" as a sexual innuendo seriously because i picture climbing a tree in my mind and then i picture a tall man in my mind and when i put those two things together im not seeing anything sexual. im seeing like. circus tricks.

im always up at ass o clock doing god knows what

subject shows painful degree of self awareness paired with a complete inability to act on it

these hips don't lie, and those hips don't tell the truth. how do you navigate out of this labyrinth

I have the perverts mind and the perverts heart. My soul? that is also quite perverted.

whatever. i don’t even care. *visibly rock hard and leaking at the tip*

the problem with playing disco elysium is that after you've played it you can't play it for the first time again. someone should fix this

At the sex shop asking if I can buy a regular sized dildo I can put in my unremarkable asshole but they recognize me as the hero of legend regardless

you're just mad because you're hungry and tired and your legs hurt and you head hurts and you're too hot and you have depression