The Carmilla Movie
Air date: October 25, 2017
Length: 1:34:27
We open with static, which disappears to be replaced by Laura against a plain white background.
Laura: Okay! Donât know how many of you are new, and how many of you have been with us from the start, but I am Laura Hollis. Yes, the Laura Hollis, who recently got famous, or âinternet famousâ, because my university pals and I vlogged ourselves saving the world.
Brief footage from 3x33, of Dean!Perry opening the Gates of Hell
Laura: See, back in my freshman year, we discovered that our Austrian university was actually being run by an evil dean and her vampire cult. Naturally. Theyâd been sacrificing girls to this monstrous creature under the campus, and I was next. Really shouldâve gone to that safety school. Anyway, the Dean sent ... Carmilla,
Footage from 1x2
Carmilla: Iâm your new roommate, sweetheart.
Back to Laura
Laura: A 300-year-old vampire with a checkered past and centuries worth of victims to kidnap me.
We see Laura and Carmilla kissing from season 3
Laura: There was just one small snag with that plan. (back to Laura) Carm and I fell in love. Carm turned her back on the evil dean, and with a little help from our friends: LaF, Perry, Kirsch, Mel, and Danny, we saved the school! And the world. For stopping the apocalypse, Carm earned herself a magical human life. A vampire no more.
Footage of Laura discovering Carmillaâs heartbeat at the end of 3x36
Laura: A chance to start again, and leave the crimes of her past behind. And for us to figure out ... whatever happens next.
New scene. Exterior: An old manor, on a stormy day.
We see Laura, waking up inside the manor, dressed in 19th century clothes, lying on a couch. She gets up.
Laura: Okay ... weird. (looks at her clothing) Old-timey and weird.
Laura notices a mirror and looks into it. She does not see her own reflection, instead, she sees another woman, dressed as she is, copying her moves. A door creaks open, and Laura turns towards it
Laura: Hello? Ghost-lady?
Suddenly, a woman dressed all in black, with a veil over her face, appears behind Laura, and taps her shoulder. Laura runs in fear out the room and down some stairs, looking behind her. At the foot of the stairs, she runs into the same mysterious woman. The woman lifts her veil, reveiling herself to be Carmilla.
Carmilla: Youâre wearing my broach.
Laura: Carm!
Carmilla: Did I scare you, my pet?
Laura: You think? Sneaking around, dressed like Lizzie Borden? Wait, why are you dressed like Lizzie Borden?
Carmilla: You mustnât be afraid
Laura: Why would I be afraid?
Carmilla: We shall die, as lovers may ... (Carmilla kisses Laura) Die together, so that we may live together.
Carmillaâs fangs appear, and she bites Laura, drinking from her, Laura looking terrified
Suddenly the scene changes, and we see Laura waking up from a nightmare, her head on Carmillaâs lap.
Carmilla: Welcome back, creampuff.
Laura (moving up from Carmillaâs lap to lay her head on Carmillaâs hsoulder, we hear screams and chainsaw sounds from a TV offscreen) I think your horror movies are giving me nightmares
Carmilla: Oh, well, lifeâs rough like that sometimes.
The camera zooms out, giving us a broader view of the living room
Carmilla: Come on! How long does it take to kill one limping teenager? Is this guy on a coffee break? (to Laura) So, what happened? Did you get scooped up by that talking goat again?
Laura: No, I dreamed you were a vampire. (Sitting up) It was very ... blast-from-your-gothic-horror-past. There was this old house, and then you ... well, you were actually kinda scary
Carmilla (concerned): Did I hurt you?
Laura: In a dream. Come on, it was probably a ... subconscious fascination with Victorian murders. Or, uh ... corests.
Carmilla: Mmm! Well, no need to go digging around in the past. We have it much better now.
Laura: No arguments here. (looks at TV) So long, hammer horror! (to Carmilla) Hello, rom-com
They start to kiss, when suddenly a loud scream and chainsaw sounds come from the TV. Carmilla turns off the TV, and they begin kissing, and we fade out to the opening credits
New scene: Another dream sequence, Lauraâs running in fear through the same mansion as before. She opens a door and sees Carmilla being placed in the coffin of blood, she closes it and keeps running, opening another door where we see Carmilla covered in bloodÂ
Laura wakes up, breathing hard. Sheâs in bed next to Carm. She kisses Carmâs forehead and gets up. We see her making coffee and pouring it into her Tardis mug. She snaps her fingers to wake herself up and sits down in front of her laptop.
Laura (with exaggerated enunciation): How now, brown cow? How now, brown cow?
She turns on the laptop, and we see her from the POV of her laptop, with a âLaura Hollisâ logo in the lower left corner.
Laura: Happy anniversary, faithful viewers! I know! Iknowiknowiknow Iâm behind in my posts, but, I would never miss this! Because 5 years ago, today, (copy of the Voice of Silas on screen with headlines âStudents Save Austria From Apocalypseâ and âGirls Sacrificed to Giant Anglerfish!â) a ragtag bunch of undergraduates stopped the dean of their evil university from unleashing Hell on Earth! Or, mostly stopped. You canât really blame us for Antarctica. And where are they now, you might ask? Well, letâs check in with a very special 5-year retrospective.
Laura looks off to the side with a dramatic gesture. And then her face turns neutral
Laura (mumbling): And then we will cut to ...
Super cheesy graphics with phrases like âtiny, gay and mightyâ and âHollis Five Year Retrospectiveâ
Back to Laura narrating
Laura: First up is LaFontaine and Perry who, as youâll recall, transferred to Occult Studies at Berkley and then started LaFerry Industries, where theyâve been revolutionizing life for the supernatural with products such as their Hemo-Soy vegan vampire sumplements ever since. Theyâve got this huge meeting with a megacoporation that wants to buy their start-up. Iâm so proud! Speaking of super-successful people, you guys remember Danny? My Lit TA, turned stalwart ally, turned repentant vampire? Has turned into ... a vampire rights advocate. And, what retrospective would be complete without a look at how Mel and Kirsch and I leveraged our coverage of the almost-apocalypse into a career in local news? And, if youâre morbidly curious, here are some clilps!
Clip 1, Laura in front of a flower shop, with âLuane Horlis Reporting Liveâ at the bottom fo the screen
Laura: Today, we explore the fast-paced world of floral arrangements.
Clip 2, Laura on another street, in front of a bakery, with the name âLauren Horleyâ
Laura: Cranberry bannock
Clip 3, another street, name displayed as âLaura âThe Puffâ Hollisâ
Laura: Ceramic cephalopod
Back to Lauraâs narration
Laura: So, yeah. Not quite achieved Lois Lane-dom. But never fear!
Laura runs off screen, and comes back with a big board with various goals on it
Laura: It is all part of my 5-year plan!
Some of the goals are marked with stars, and others with Xâs. Some are sensible goals like âMeet Christiane Amanpourâ or â200 hours volunteering in the libraryâ, while others are nerdy, like âBuffy marathon with Carmillaâ. Laura looks wistfully at he board for a moment and then pulls herself away
Laura: Yeah, um, after Carm and I took our glorious gap year, it was time to start real life. We moved town to TO, I finished my degree, stuck my foot in the door, now Iâm just waiting for my big break! Busting open some huge Woodward-and-Bernstein-style scandal and being moved up to the city desk. Admittedly, I have been waiting a while for that one. But, uh, you know ,thatâs what you do in life. You pay your dues. Unless youâre a former vampire with 300 years of sunshine and culinary history to catch up on. So, what has our Carm been up to as a living, breathing, human?
[Scene of Carmilla walking around in broad daylight]
Laura: Sheâs definitely taking advantage of ye old vampire trust fund.
[Carmilla walking out of a bakery with a pastry]
Laura: Bakery-based gluttony, check.
[Carmilla lying out in a bikini on a patio in the sun]
Laura: Sun-tanning sloth, check.
[Laura in front of a computer, eating a strawberry, Carmilla comes by and takes a bit of the strawberry with a seductive look at Laura]
Laura: I-have-a-pulse-now lust ... well ... actually I canât complain about that last one [Laura and Carmilla exit scene]
Back to Laura narrating
Laura: Yeah. Unless you count starring in my spooky dreams, itâs been a bit more pastry than purpose lately. But! Todayâs retrospective is all about perspective. We are going to get our heroine back on track. But, where to start such a conversation? Where else? [Laura pulls a cake into camera view] With desert!
Carmilla walks in
Carmilla: Mmm ... have you been baking?
Laura: Happy rebirthday! [kisses carmilla several times] Itâs, um ... like a ... like a birthday, but for your rebirth. Because, five years ago, you got a life. Not like 90s âget a lifeâ, but you know, um, literally.
Carmilla: Hmm, how very Lewis Carol.
[Carmilla turns the webacm off and closes the laptop]
Laura: So ... speaking of five years, I was thinking that we could talk about five years in the other direction. [Carmilla looks faintly exasperated] Cause youâve been through a lot. Not just Silas, but death. And the French Revolution. So, itâs completely understandable that youâre feeling a little lost
Carmilla: Lost?
Laura: Okay, maybe not lost, but maybe a little ... aimless?
Carmilla: Laura, are you staging an intervention because you think Iâm wasting my life?
Laura: No! [Carmilla gives her a look like âreally?â] Maybe. Itâs just ... you arenât immortal anymore. And I know that you want to make the most of our lives together, but -
Carmilla: Is there something wrong with those lives being fun?
Laura: No! But I think itâs possible to have fun and ...
Carmilla: And did I go to that supernatural therapist?
Laura: One time. You siad you couldnât take advice from someone born after the moon landing.
Carmilla:Â Mm-hmm, and do I pester you because youâd rather spend your days in a news cubicle instead of on a beach in the South of France?
Laura: No, you donât. Itâs just ...
Carmilla: Itâs just, you like making plans. And I love that about you. But, I donât know, itâs my rebirthday, so ... I want to spend it enjoying our lives. Preferably [wipes a bit of chocolate icing on Lauraâs lip] somewhere with a patio and an extensive wine selection? [they kiss] And chocolates
They wander off-screen together, tightly embracing, the camera zooms in on the cake; Carmilla runs back on camera to blow out the candles, and then they both leave the scene again.
Several city scenes, a sunset, night time, then back to their home. Carmillaâs in bed already, and Laura puts some moisturizer on her hands. They snuggle together on the bed. Laura falls asleep, and itâs another dream sequence. Sheâs in bed, and she sees Carmilla crouched at the foot of the bed. In the background is a painting of Carmilla.
Laura: Carm?
Carmilla: Shhh. Youâre dreaming.
Laura turns on a lamp, and Carmilla winces, covering her eyes
Laura: Oh. Right.
Carmilla crawls onto the bed towards Laura, in a scene shot to resemble a famous illustration from the original publication of Carmilla
Carmilla: You are mine. You shall be mine. You and I are one, forever.
Laura: Something tells me Iâm gonna like this dream.
Carmilla strokes Lauraâs face, and then her fangs appear, and she bites Laura. Lauraâs eyes snap wide open. Sheâs back in the real world now, and the real Carmilla is biting her neck.
Laura: Carm! What are you doing?! [pushes Carmilla off her, Carmilla hisses, her fangs exposed] Carm! Hey! Hey! Itâs me! Itâs me! [snaps her fingers]
Carmilla comes to, and looks horrified
Carmilla: Laura, your neck! Oh, God! [she moves towards Laura, and Laura backs up, still afraid; Carmilla pulls back, looking completely horrified]
Laura: What is going on?
New scene: Back in the living room. Carmillaâs sitting in a chair with some kind of electrodes on her forhead. LaF and Perry are there. LaF is holding some kind of electronic tablet, while Perry has some notes in front of her. Laura is standing watching, with bandaids on Carmillaâs bite mark
Perry: Have you been in close proximity to any vampires or vampire by-products in the past two or three months?
Carmilla: Oh, you mean when a Sumerian goddess turned me again last week? Mustâve slipped my mind.
Perry: I see that sarcasm hasnât suffered.
Laura: Thanks for taking some time out of your meeting prep to help us.
LaF: For you guys? Anything.
Perry: Of course! Weâre probably over-prepared.
LaF: Somethingâs definitely off with Carm.
LaFâs scanning her with their robot eye, we see various graphs and the like, a light glowing above Carmillaâs chest, and the words âlifeforce: flickeringâ, among others
Laura: For those of us without a fancy cyborg eye?
LaF: Right. Um, this is Carm [LaF turns their pad around for Laura and Perry to see; it shows an abstract form of a female body, with a glow in the chest] And sheâs, well, dead, except ...
Perry: Except, the resurrection spell is still running inside her, making her a living human
LaF: It makes her heart beat, hair grow, and all the other things a regular human body does
Laura: Yeah, like a magic battery
Carmilla: I thought we agreed we wouldnât call it that.
LaF: My voteâs still with life-force
Carmilla: No, thatâs even worse!
Perry: Oh! What about her, um, what about your spark?
LaF: Hmm, it does work pretty much like an ignition
Perry: Spark it is! Spark, spark, spark!
Carmilla: I hope youâre enjoying yourselves.
LaF: Uh ... Carmillaâs spark is ... going out.
Laura: Whatâs wrong with it?
LaF: Itâs producing a sort of electrical discharge thatâs making it flicker, and, since itâs whatâs keeping her human, when it flickers, she ...
Laura: Vamps out.
Laura sighs and sits down
Carmilla: Okay, so ... how do we get my .... spark to stop flickering?
LaF: Weâll have to run some more tests.
Laura: And in the meantime, Carm just keeps randomly vamping out? What are we supposed to do about that?
Perry pulls out a bunch of garlic. Carmilla sighs.
Montage of scenes, mimicking the ones earlier where Laura was talking about Carmillaâs âaimlessnessâ, but twisted. First we see Carmilla lying out on the patio, but instead of enjoying the sun, sheâs trying to cover up, with a bottle of hemo-soy beside her, then we see her biting a strawberry that Laura was eating, but accidentally biting her hand, then we see her drinking a squirrelâs blood at the same place we saw her getting a pastry before
Then we see their bedroom again. Cloves of garlic in the foreground. Carmillaâs lying on the bed, looking sad.
Laura (applying moisturizer): [Unclear dialogue, something about Mel?] ... Kirsch, of course, is jazzed, like âOh, thereâll be blueberry pie, right? Iâm into the bluebsâ, and then to top it all off, I get to the fridge, and itâs just ... Carm? You okay?
Carmilla: Sure. Just grappling with an aversion to daylight and cravings for blood.
Laura: Hey, LaF is going to figure something out.
Carmilla: I know. Itâs just ... this was supposed to be done. You know? The bloodlust, the self-loathing. The sleeping tied to a chair in my own bedroom.
Laura: That one might be overkill. Youâve never had a problem controlling yourself before. [Carmilla nods] Unless you count dream-Carm chasing me through discount Transylvania all âyou are mine, you shall be mineâ
Carmilla: Wait ... what did you just say?
Laura:Â âYou are mine, you shall be mine, you and I are one foreverâ
Carmilla gets up and runs into the living room, searching through the bookshelves
Laura: Carm, what is going on? It was just some silly Dracu-poetry my brain coughed up for atmosphere [Carmilla opens up a chest] What are you looking for? [Carmilla takes out a book from the chest, looking through it, and finding a photograph, which she shows Laura. Itâs the mansion from her dreams] That house!
Carmilla: This is where Elle and I lived. Is this the manor in your dreams?
New scene; Laura, Carmilla, Mel, Kirsch, LaF, and Perry are all in a park
Perry: So, this place Lauraâs been dreaming about, the manor, itâs real?
Carmilla: Not just the manor. Â
Laura: Carm thinks that, from what Iâm describing, the house, the clothes, what she says, that Iâm dreaming things that really happened. [Perry and LaF look thoughtful] .... A hundred and fifty years ago [Mel and Kirsch look thoughtful] ... to Elle. Â
Perry, LaF, and Mel all look at Laura shocked; Kirsch has no reaction, he notices everyone elseâs reaction
Kirsch: Am I supposed to know who Elle is?
LaF: Elle? The girl Carm turned on her mother and stopped being evil for?
Kirsch: That wasnât Laura?
Perry: Carmillaâs epic first love?
Kirsch: Also not Laura?
Laura: Remember first year at Silas, those weird dreams I was having?
Kirsch: Only those werenât dreams! They were warnings from Carmâs ... [look of realization]
Mel: So, you think the dreams are from Elle? Didnât she, like, sparkle off into floaty white nothingness after Carmilla killed the giant anglerfish god? ... How is that a sentence I ended up saying?
Laura: Only one way to find out. We go back to the scene of the crime.
LaF: If itâs ghosts, we can test out the new spectrometer.
The conversation fades out, as Carmilla starts staring at Lauraâs neck, the sound of pumping blood; Laura turns to Carmilla
Laura: Carm?
Carmilla shakes her attention off Lauraâs neck.
Carmilla: Yeah ... Iâm gonna go crack another bottle of hemo-soy
Carmilla gets up. Laura, Mel, and Kirsch look at each other. Laura gets up and follows Carmilla
Laura: Hey. Sorry about the whole âscene of the crimeâ thing. I know what happened between you and Elle was complicated, and I shouldnâtâve said that.
Carmilla: No. Scene of the crime is exactly what it is. You saw those dreams. You know I ... hurt her. Hurt you.
Laura: You didnât mean to. Maybe thereâs a silver lining in all this. If this is Elle trying to warn us about something, maybe you can ... help her?
Carmilla: Iâm done being a vampire. Iâm done dredging up the past. Iâm done with ... well-meaning therapists saying âclose your eyes and think of those youâve wronged, while I light up this funky incenseâ, and ...
Laura: Thatâs right. We have plans. And goals. And a color-coated chart [Carmilla smiles, laughing softly] None of which features some mystery from your past stealing the life that you earned. So, we are going to figure out who or what is doing this, and then we are going to -
Carmilla (looking way too cheerful): Gruesomely murder them?
Laura: Stop them. (Carm rolls her eyes) Weâre going back to Styria!
Transition scene; cheesy image of a world map, showing their flight, with voiceovers
Kirsch: Where are we going?!
Laura: Styria!
Kirsch: Why are we going?
Laura: To stop Carm from re-vamping!
Kirsch: Okay, but really, why go back to the bad place with the monsters?
Laura: Because of Elleâs manor? Itâs in my dream, itâs all connected? And itâs our only lead!
Montage of various foods
Kirsch: Oooh, schnitzel ...
New scene; all six walking dramatically along a path, looking determined, then the music stops, and theyâre all looking exhausted
Kirsch: How much further till we get to this place?
Carmilla: Itâs just ...
Laura (dropping her bag): Right around the corner
Laura and Carmilla walk towards the manor, ahead of the rest
Kirsch: Oh, yeah, itâs cool, Laura! I got your bag! Yeah.
Laura: You donât have to do this if you donât want. You can just stay here if itâs too much.
Carmilla: Hmm. And leave you alone to explore the mystery mansion? Hard pass.
Laura and Carmilla walk up to the entrance. We see a brief glimpse of someone in an upstairs window
Laura and Carmilla enter the manor; we see them entering from inside the building; on the wall in the foreground is a portrait of the same woman Laura saw in the mirror in her dream
Laura (entering the manor with Carmilla): Hello?
They look at each other, and continue in. Carmillaâs attention is drawn to the portrait for a long moment.
Kirsch: Hello? Knock-knock? Elleâs manorâs pretty cool!
Mel: I guess. If you dig the Harenhal vibe. Hello? Anybody?
LaF: Iâm calling it. This place is totally haunted.
Perry: You donât know that. Maybe itâs just ... creaky. Itâs a lovely example of a 19th century schloss.
Kirsch: Heh, schloss.
Laura: This is exactly like my dream. Beautiful. I mean, abandoned and dusty, but beautiful.
Perry (putting rubber gloves on): Well, we can deal with the dust.
Mel: Tell me you did not bring an entire bag of cleaning supplies?
Perry: Of course I did! Do you know what dust does to expensive equipment?
LaF: We have EMF detectors, geiger counters, various spectrometers
Mel: You didnât think maybe weâd need some actual weapons?
LaF: Well, knowledge is really the best -
Mel (pulling out a crossbow): Iâm pretty sure weapons are the best weapon. Look at this princess. Carbon-fiber lens, 80-pound drawweight, capable of shooting 160 feet per second. I call her, Gertrude.
Perry: How excessive
Mel: Excessive? Do you remember senior year? You were possessed by Carmillaâs mom, the evil god who forced the entire student body, including me, to dig a pit to the literal gates of hell, or how about that time LaFontaine got brain-sucked by the giant anglerfish monster? Or how about that time that the evil baron tried to execute Carmilla? Or that time that Laura sorta, kinda, I donât know, died?
Kirsch: We do have a lot of back-story.
Sounds of thunder and strange crashing noises, spooking everyone
Perry: Fine, fine, haunted.
Mel (to Laura and Carmilla): Tell me at least you two packed some heat?
Carmilla heads over to look at the portrait in the hall
Laura: Uh, I know krav maga. I am a weapon. I brought walkie-talkies and flashlights for everyone. Thereâs no cell service out here, theyâre gonna come in handy!
Carmillaâs approaching the portrait slowly
Mel (off screen): How âbout you, Jughead? [sound of a beer can opening] Oh, Vincent van Bro brought beer.
Mel looks over at Carmilla and turns to Laura
Mel: Is that her?
Laura: Yeah. [long pause] Letâs search this place!
Mel: For a ... girl who died 150 years ago?
LaF: Better not keep her waiting.
We see a sequence of search scenes, first Mel and Kirsch looking in a room with flashlights, then Perry and LaF with flashlights and EMF detectors, then we see Laura and Carmilla entering a room. Laura sees the portrait of Carmilla that was in the background of one of her dreams. The portrait is lying on the floor, slashed. Laura picks it up.
Laura: Is that you?
Carmilla: It was.
We switch to LaF and Perry
Perry: We should be safe to push the meeting to next week, donât you think?
LaF: Do we have to talk about this right now?
Perry: Single most important meeting of our professional careers?
LaF: Perr, we are searching a haunted castle for ghosts. This is literally the reason we started the company.
Perry: But if we had more resources, then -
LaF: Hold on, I think Iâve got a hit! Nah, itâs gone now.
Perry: Well, now, see, as part of Intrigue, weâd have all the equipment, we could scan the house in like two seconds.
LaF: Yeah, I get it. But weâre not selling out right this second, so can we focus on the task at hand? Letâs check out the next room.
They leave the room. The door closes, revealing a ghost in 19th century clothing.
Weâre back to Laura and Carmilla
Laura: Looking forward to seeing her? Elle, I mean? Wouldnât blame you if you were
Carmilla: Honestly, Iâd rather not. I mean, what am I supposed to say?  âSorry I lied to you and sacrificed you to a giant fish-monsterâ? I doubt thereâs a hallmark card.
Laura (walks over to Carm, and strokes her hair): It wasnât all your fault.
We switch back to Mel and Kirsch. Something moves in the foreground, and Kirsch spins around to look at it, but itâs gone before a clear sight can be made. Mel raises her crossbow as they both back up. Kirsch backs up into another ghost, and starts screaming.
We get back to Laura and Carmilla. Lauraâs walkie-talkie beeps.
Laura: Told her these were gonna come in handy
Kirsch (over walkie-talkie): Ghosts! The schloss is full of ghosts!
Laura and Carmilla look at each other. And suddenly another ghost shows up. They start running.
Laura: Ghosts! Ghosts! Everyone, come on!
LaF: Haunted house! Totally called it!
Perry: Run, weirdo!
Everyoneâs running towards the front door. Laura and Carmilla reach it first, but the door wonât open. Itâs completely stuck.
Laura: Itâs stuck!
The ghosts continue to approach them. They run to another room, running into another locked door, the ghosts surrounding them. They turn to face the ghosts, whoâve stopped right in front of them.
Laura: Um ... hi. Iâm Laura. These are my friends. And weâd be thrilled if youâd abandon your plans to gruesomely murder us.
One of the ghosts, Emily, speaks
Emily: Hello, Miss Karnstein.
Carmilla (confused): Hello? Wait ... I know you. How do I know you?
Emily (turning to another ghost, Charlotte): Oh, dear. Well, this is awkward. We imagined youâd recall ...
Charlotte: Killing us. Iâm Charlotte. This is my sister Emily.
Laura: Carmilla killed you?
Emily: Oh, no, not quite, exactly. Her mother did the actual deed.
Laura: Youâre the girls who were sacrificed to the Deep One.
Lightning. We pan over the various ghosts.
Charlotte; Yes. We are the victims of Carmilla Karnstein.
Emily: And weâd like to invite you to a dinner.
New scene. Dinner table, a roast pig in the center of the table. Emily and Charlotte are at the ends of the table. One side are Carmilla, Laura, and Kirsch, with Perry, LaF, and Mel on the other. Kirsch is eagerly digging in, while the others seem more suspicious
Emily: Itâs wonderful that youâve all been able to join us. And, naturally, weâre so glad youâve arrived in time.
Charlotte: Weâve been waiting for weeks.
Laura: For us?
Emily: For Miss Karnstein. We hoped once she realized what had happened sheâd return
Mel: Hold up. Did you just confess to flipping the vampire switch on our girl Carm here?
Emily: Oh! Goodness, no, we couldnât have. What little research we have been able to perform suggests it was Miss Karnsteinâs life-force that pulled us into the physical world. Until a few weeks ago, we were trapped in a nightmare land, doomed to endlessly repeat our greatest regrets.
LaF: This nightmare afterlife, is it more of a Jungian unconscious, or a âThrough the Looking Glassâ style situation?
Perry: Stop that! Itâs not polite to pry into other peopleâs unspeakable suffering.
Laura: Why would you be connected to Carmillaâs human life?
Emily: Ah, w-we think it ... might be ... because ... it was Miss Karnstein who ...
Charlotte: Sheâs the reason we died
Carmilla looks uncomfortable.
Emily: Yes. The family here offered my sister and I a place to lodge
Charlotte: They neglected to mention the vampire cult
Mel: Same thing happened with my college acceptance letter
Laura: Y-you said you knew the family. Does that mean you knew Elle?
Both Emily and Charlotte look confused
Carmilla: Miss Sheridan.
Emily: Ah, yes. We knew her.
Laura: But she isnât here with you?
Charlotte: No. She isnât with us.
Emily: But, weâre thrilled that you are!
Carmilla (sighs and puts down her wine glass): Okay, thatâs it. Whatâs with the Stepford act?  I got you and your sister killed
Emily: Yes, but youâre here now. And according to this spell book, we need you, Carmilla, here to perform the ritual that will let us move on.
Perry: I donât ... suppose I could take a crack at deciphering the book?
Emily: Oh, please, do. Iâve deciphered what I can, but Iâm hardly an adept. Ah, from what I can tell, if we move on, your vampire symptoms will go away. I assume thatâs why youâve come? Havenât you? Because otherwise youâd be trapped here with us forever?
New scene: The gang is in a bedroom, talking and getting ready for bed.
Mel: So ... theyâre obviously evil.
Kirsch: Nah, I though they were kinda nice
Carmilla: More importantly, is this ritual of theirs even gonna fix me?
Perry (reading the spellbook): Well, it looks promising.
Carmilla: Promising? Â Are you telling me you were possessed by an evil goddess for, like, six months -
Perry: Eight. Â It was eight months.
Carmilla: And you canât get more specific than that?
Perry: The whole book is written in code. Â But, if the familyâs notes are correct, it seems as though itâs two birds, one stone. Â The ghosts move on, Carmilla stays human.
LaFontaine: That makes sense. Â When I scanned them, the energy from your spark was flowing straight to them.
Mel: Look, for all we know, they lured us in and trapped us here. Â Are we seriously gonna trust them?
Laura: What happened to them wasnât their fault. Â They were girls just like you or me with their whole lives ahead of them. Â If this ritual helps them and keeps Carm human, we have to try it.
Later that night. Â Laura and Carmilla are lying in bed. Â Perryâs working on a laptop, sitting on the floor by the couch LaF is scanning the room with an EMF detector
Kirsch: Sweet! Â Is that a Gameboy?
LaF: Even better. Â Itâs an EMF alarm. Â It might be nice to get a heads-up if any ghosts come calling.
LaF puts the EMF detector up on a mantle and sits down on the couch.
LaF: Psst, Perr, about before ...
Perry: Oh, Iâm glad we postponed the meeting.
LaF: You are?
Perry: With all the data weâve collected here? Â Weâre in a much stronger bargaining position.
LaF: Really, Perr? Â I know this is the big leagues, but why are you so pumped to sell our company?
Perry: Do you even know what I do all day, while youâre off playing in your little lab? Â [LaF looks upset] I balance our budgets. Â Get our products approved. Â Handle the reckless endangerment lawsuits. Â I mean, at Intrigue thereâd be a legal ... [Carmilla clears her throat, Perry reduces her volume] ... thereâd be a legal department, LaF
LaF: I see. Â And, uh, by âplayingâ you mean the research that makes our company possible?
Perry: Oh, that is not fair, you -
LaF: You know what? Â I am too tired to deal with this right now. Â [LaF lies down on the couch, pulling a blanket overthemself. Â Perry goes back to her computer]
New scene. Â Kirsch is making a sandwich, and Mel approaches him, startling him, causing him to drop his sandwich.
Kirsch: On, man, we killed my sandwich. Â [Kirsch picks up the sandwich] Tutti abal tutti. Â [to Mel] Five-second rule. Â [bites into sandwich]
Mel: Have we, or have we not, had multiple conversations about not wandering away in the haunted house?
Kirsch: I know. Â Itâs just the ghost ladies are so nice. Â And you know how I feel about leftovers.
Mel: Kirsch, if your stomach gets me dragged into some kind of black girl dies first bullshit, I am gonna come back from the dead and haunt your bar fridge.
They hear a noise coming from another room, and go to check it out
Charlotte: They arenât going to go along with it.
Emily: Theyâll get caught up in the surprise. Â Youâll see. Â It will all come out exactly as we planned.
Charlotte: Why arenât we just telling them?
Kirschâs stomach growls, alerting Emily and Charlotte to their presence. Â Kirsch and Mel hurry off to hide, while Emily and Charlotte leave the room, locking it behind them.
Back to the bedroom, Laura and Carmilla are asleep. Â Laura has another dream. Â Laura notices the nightgown from before
Laura: Ugh, this again? Â Really?
She hears Mattie from another room
Mattie: You would do well, little sister, to finish your task here. Â We live for the eternal moment, chĂŠrie. Â We are power.
Thereâs further talking but itâs indistinct, Laura notices some creepy paintings as she walks through a hall
Mattie: FaĂŽtes attention, chĂŠrie. Â You would do well, little sister, to finish your task here without further delay.
Laura peeks into a room and sees Carmilla dressed in all black, holding a book.
Laura: Did you ever think that our part in this, that what we do might be ... unforgivable?
Mattie: You must stop reading the romantics!  [takes book away from her] We live for the eternal moment, chĂŠrie!  We are power, pleasure [Carmilla walks away from Lauraâs sight, while Mattie walks into her sight] and are only accountable for our desires.  And maman, who is growing impatient.  FaĂŽtes attention, chĂŠrie.  Votre mère vous met en garde contre lâassassin.
Mattie walks towards the door. Â Laura runs off. Â Carmilla and Mattie leave the room.
Laura enters the room Mattie and Carmilla just left. Â She sees a broach on a plain table.
Carmilla (faint voiceover): Youâre wearing the broach
Thereâs a sound of girls laughing, and then a thunderclap, and a ring of paper dolls appears, surrounding the broach. Â Laura looks at the paper dolls. Â Suddenly the laughing changes to screams
Woman: No! Â I donât want to go back!
The dolls start to burn and are replaced by a ring of ash in seconds. Carmillaâs gloved hand touches Laura, and suddenly she wakes up in the real world.
Carmilla: Hey, you all right?
Laura: Another nightmare. Â You and Mattie were talking and she said something about an assassin, and then these paper dolls disintegrated, and I donât know. Â It seemed more coherent when it was happening.
Carmilla: Youâre still havin the dreams? Â But weâre here, I mean, why would you still be having them, unless ...
Mel walks in
Mel: Something else is going on.
Carmilla: Knocking, still not a thing.
Mel: The Hunger wanted a midnight snack and while he was getting it, we caught our ghostesses talking about some kind of surprise we arenât gonna like and sneaking into a locked room. Â So theyâre hiding something. Â Or someone.
Daytime. Â Laura, Carmilla, Mel, and Kirsch confronting Emily and Charlotte.
Emily: Hiding something? Â How could we possibly -
Mel: Whatâs behind the door?
Charlotte: Why should that concern you?
Mel: Maybe I donât like surprises.
Charlotte: You look like a woman who can cope. Â [Mel and Charlotte share a long stare]
Laura: This could all be easily resolved by just showing us whatâs behind door number one.
Emily: Of course. Â If you insist, but ... youâll ruin the surprise.
Carmilla: Weâll risk it. Â [Emily turns to unlock and open the door] Weâd kind of like to know if youâre planning to ... [They walk into the room and see all kinds of party preparation] ... to throw a party?
Lauraâs looking around excited, while Carmilla looks confused
Emily: To thank you for helping us.
Carmilla: Youâre throwing a party?
Charlotte: The ritual canât be performed until the Ash Moon, and Emily always loved to dress up.
Mel (to Charlotte): I canât imagine youâre a slouch in that department.
Carmilla: You canât be serious
Laura (looking at a bottle of champagne): I think itâs sweet. Â Itâs like a pre-ritual going-away party, before they go away. Â Permanently.
Emily: Exactly! Â And, we would be honored if you would attend.
Laura: Yeah, of course! Â [she notices a closet with ball gowns] Â Oh, my gosh! Â [she takes out a gown] Ball gowns? Â Are we gonna get our strictly ballroom on? Â Aaa! Â Best haunting ever! Â [she gives Carmilla a quick peck on the cheek and runs out excitedly]
Exterior of mansion
Carmilla (off camera): Howâs it going in there?
Interior. Â Carmillaâs sitting on a couch already in a dress while Lauraâs struggling to get her dress on behind a dressing screen.
Laura: BBC period dramas do not spend enough time on how complicated these clothes are. Â I swear, Iâve been in here for 40 minutes. Â Hey, thanks for going along with this, by the way.
Carmilla: Well, whatâs to go along with? Â I like a canape as much as the next girl.
Laura: Still, it canât be fun hanging out with you ....
Carmilla: Former victims?
Laura: No matter how nice they are.
Carmilla: Hmm, yeah, well, Iâd appreciate it if they took it down a notch.
Laura: Youâd prefer a roaring rampage of revenge?
Carmilla: Well, all this forgiveness is making me twitchy.
Laura (putting a choker on around her neck) You think maybe thatâs cause deep down you still donât think you can be forgiven?
Carmilla: I see weâve reached the amateur psychoanalysis round. Â See, this is why I blew off that therapist. Â You know, some things are just too much to talk about in an office full of crystal dolphins.
Laura: I think maybe thatâs the point of the talking
Carmilla: Yeah, except it wasnât just talking, there was this manifes-
Laura steps out from behind the dressing screen. Â Carmilla is completely dumbfounded by how Laura looks.
Laura: You arenât saying anything. Â Did I put it on wrong? Â I look ridiculous. Â I do. Â I look ridiculous, I -
Carmilla gets up from the couch and approaches Laura. Â They kiss. Â They separate and Carmilla takes a long look at Laura.
Carmilla: Forty minutes to get you into that, hunh? Â Bet I could get you out of it faster.
They kiss again. Â Carmilla turns Laura around, her hand around her waist, kissing her collar
Laura: Weâre already gonna be late for the ball
Carmilla: So let us be late.
Carmilla unzips Lauras dress, removing it, exposing her corset, Laura turns back around to face Carmilla, as they kiss. Â Carmilla turns around and Laura removed her dress.
Laura drops to her knees, kissing Carmilla as she does. Â She kisses the inside of Carmillaâs thigh, as Carmilla gently plays with her hair. Â Laura stands up, briefly kissing Carmilla, and then breaking away to lie down on the bed, Â Carmilla joins her on the bed, she kisses Laura, and then moves down her body, kissing her left breast. Â Carmilla lifts up Lauraâs skirt, and dives under it. Â The camera focus on Lauraâs face as she gasps in pleasure
Carmilla wipes her mouth as she goes in to kiss Laura. Â Laura flips them over so that sheâs on top. Â Carmilla removes Lauraâs corset leaving her topless (seen from behind), Laura drops back down to kiss Carmilla as Carmilalâs hands run along Lauraâs back, scratching it, as Lauraâs hand moves off screen, Carmilla moaning
We see Laura and Carmilla dressed fully again, with masquerade masks running down the stairs, Laura in the lead
Carmilla: Iâm coming.
They reach the ballroom. An unnamed ghost greets them. There are several pairs of ghosts dancing, as well as LaF and Perry. Mel is standing in the background watching, next to Charlotte.
LaF: Looking good, frosh!
Carmilla looks at Laura
Laura (laughing): What?
Carmilla: May I have this dance?
They go out on the dance floor, giggling, and start dancing
Perry: Iâm sorry about the way I handled things last night.
LaF: Itâs alright, I know you didnât mean any of it.
Perry: I may have been a little harsh, but that doesnât mean I was wrong.
LaF: Letâs not fight in front of the ghosts, honey.
Charlotte looks bored.
Mel: Itâs not your thing either, hunh?
Charlotte: Emily has always wanted to belong to society. I understood life differently. [Mel looks at her] If you have to conform, you never belonged.
Mel (smiling): Okay, how did you fall for Vampirellaâs schtick?
Charlotte: I didnât. My sister vanished. I went looking of her. Sheâs never forgiven herself.
Mel: What about you?
Charlotte: I didnât leave her then, how could I now?
Mel: You wanna try this stupid dance?
Charlotte: Obviously.
Mel and Charlotte dance.
We see several dancing couples, including Kirsch with another unnamed ghost-lady
Laura (slow-dancing very close with Carmilla): This is nice. Kinda like that grad ball we never got âcause our school was a supernatural death trap. [Carmilla chuckles] I missed this. I mean, not the pulse-pounding terror, but ... the parts where we help people. Though, I do wish weâd figure out why the ghosts were here in the first place.
Carmilla: Hey, Laura ...
Laura: I know, no need to keep prying. The ghosts will move on. You will get your life back and ... we can go back home.
Carmilla: No. I, um ... I think at that therapistâs appointment, I may have, um ...
Laura notices the table from her dream, and has a brief flashback to the dolls disintegrating and other scenes
Carmilla: Laura?
Laura: Sorry. Weird dĂŠjĂ vu.
Suddenly she sees dream!Carmilla for a brief second. She backs away from Carmilla
Carmilla: Hey, whatâs going on?
Laura: I though ... I thought I saw ... the woman in black, the ... you! The you from my dreams, but thatâs impossible, right?
Carmilla: Come on, letâs sit down.
Laura sits down on a chair
Laura: Iâll get you a drink, okay?
Laura has a dream-vision. Carmilla, all in black, with a woman dressed in white with purple fringes.
Carmilla: Come with me, loving me, to death, or else hate me and still come with me, hating me through death and after
Laura snaps back to reality, LaF is next to her.
LaF: Are you okay?
Carmilla arrives with two glasses of champaign. Laura notices a woman dressed in black, with a mask. Laura gets up, rushing to where she saw the woman, but the woman is gone.
Laura: Where is she?
Carmilla: Hey ...
Laura: She was right here!
Mel: Whatâs going on, Hollis?
Laura: The woman in black, the one wearing a mask
Mel: Everybodyâs wearing a mask. [to Charlotte] Do you know who sheâs talking about?
Charlotte (to Laura): Maybe if youâre not feeling well, you should sit down.
Laura: Iâm dreaming things while Iâm awake now. Whatâs next?
A light glow fills the room.
Emily: Itâs almost time! The Ash Moon has begun. Gather round for the ritual.
Skip to all the ghosts plus Carmilla in a circle around a black table (the same one from Lauraâs dream), Laura and the others are standing outside of the circle.
Emily: Before we begin, I want to say how grateful we are. Whatever youâve done in the past, youâve come to help us now, and I think that shows a strength of character that is quite remarkable.
Carmilla: Yeah, sure.
Charlotte: Itâs time, Emily.
Perry: Itâs your last night on Earth. Are you sure you donât want another drink before you go?
Charlotte: The ritual must be performed before the Ash Moon ends at sunrise. Otherwise, weâre trapped here forever. So, no.
Emily begins reciting some foreign language and places a broach in the center of the table, the one from Lauraâs dream
Carmilla: Wait, thatâs the broach that I ...
Emily and Charlotte place her hands on the broach, and she gasps, frozen. The ghosts join hands.
Laura: Carm?
A glowing light appears from Carmillaâs chest, moving into the broach.
LaF: Thatâs Carmillaâs spark! Itâs leaving her! Wh-why is it going in to the broach?
The ghosts start shaking and seizing
Kirsch: Uh ... guys?
LaFÂ (looking worried) Did that spell say anything about spirit entanglement?
Emily: Itâs not supposed to happen like this!
Laura: Somethingâs wrong!
She starts to approach the circle, but is stopped by Perry
Perry: Laura, stay back, itâs dangerous!
Laura: We have to stop the ritual!
Emily: I canât! Itâs out of control!
Suddenly Emily disappears, in a brief flame, which spread through the circle
Unnamed ghost: Weâve been tricked!
Charlotte: I donât want to go back!
LaF: We need to disrupt the circle!
LaF rushes towards the circle to try to break it. They free Charlotte from the circle, but get caught themself, pushing Charlotte back into Laura before they disappear.
Perry: LaF!
Laura rushes twoards Carmilla
Perry: Donât touch Carmilla, it will take you too!
A masked woman appears, the same woman we saw earlier, humming.
Woman (to Carmilla): Did you think youâd get away with it? Summon us up to ease your mind and then just waltz away? Did you really think thereâd be no consequences?
Laura: Itâs you.
The woman removes her mask, revealing herself to be Elle.
Elle: Surprise! Not the brightest little ingÊnue, are we?
She grabs the broach. Thereâs a bright light and a high-pitched ring as everyone falls back. When the light fades, everyoneâs on the floor, geting up. Except Carmilla, whoâs not getting up. Elle takes something from the table and leaves.
Kirsch notices a pile of dust where LaF had been
Kirsch: Is that pile of dust LaFontaine?
Perry: Theyâre j-... theyâre just ... theyâre just gone
Mel (to Charlotte): Are you okay?
Laura (off screen): Carm?
Charlotte: I need to hide
Charlotte runs off
The camera shifts to Laura and Carmilla, Carmillaâs on the floor, not moving
Laura: Carm? Carm? [Checks Carmillaâs pulse] Carm! [Laura starts shaking her] Carm! Hey! Hey! Câmon, hey! [slaps Carmillaâs cheeks trying to wake her up] Carm! Hey! Hey! Hey! Hey!
Carmilla opens her eyes
Carmilla: Hey ...
Laura pulls her up and they embrace. Lauraâs eyes widen in shock
Laura: Your heart. Itâs not beating. Youâre a vampire.
The camera shifts to Elle at the front door, trying to get out, but the door is still stuck.
Elle: Nooo!!!! Why wonât it work? Iâve sent all the ghosts away! [takes out broach and starts chanting in foreign language again; she tries again with no success] Did one of them escape me?
Back in the bedroom, Kirsch is changing, while Perry reads the book.
Kirsch: So, did I miss something, or did that go radically not as planned?
Laura: It was Elle. She was at the masquerade. She knew about the ritual, she knew exactly what was going to happen.
Kirsch: How could she have known?
Carmilla: Because Emily and Charlotte lied to us. They had to have known she was here
Laura: You think vacuumed, screaming back to a hellish nightmarescape was part of their plan? [Perry and Carmilla look at her] Sorry. We will figure this out. We will find LaF. Why would Elle do this?
Carmilla (holding a bottle of hemo-soy): You heard her, to punish me for what I did by stealing my life. [drinks from the bottle]
Laura: But she canât steal anything, sheâs trapped here just like us unless all the ghosts move on.
Perry: But the ghosts are gone. All of them except Elle and Charlotte. Elle canât leave until Charlotte is also sent back to the nightmare land, like all the other ghosts. LaF thwarted her plan
Carmilla: And now that my sparkâs in the broach and Elle has the broach, if she gets rid of Charlotte, she could become human and leave.
Laura: We have to find her. Now.
Mel (entering the room): Thatâs easier said then done. Miss Sheridan is gone, girl.
Carmilla: Not to mention we donât exactly know how to extract a life force from a magical broach.
Carmilla sets down the now-empty bottle of hemo-soy, and picks up another one
Mel: You may want to go easy on those, that's the only case
Carmilla: Terrific.
Laura: But, Elle must have the spell already. Â I mean, thatâs her escape plan, right? Â So we have to find Elle before she gets to Charlotte, then Perry can find the spell to put your spark back -
Perry: Laura, what are you talking about? Â We have to find LaF first.
Laura: Of course, of course, we have to find both of them, but if we lose Elle now, then all of use are trapped -
Perry: We have to find Elle later, LaF comes first!
Laura: We canât just let her take Carmillaâs life!
Awkward silence as everyone looks at each other
Kirsch: We could start in the study
Mel: I canât believe Iâm saying this, but beefcheeks is right. Â We donât have much time.
Mel, Kirsch, and Perry leave the room. Â Carmilla approaches Laura, touching her arm. Â Laura pulls away
Laura: I need to get out of this dress
Carmilla: It will be easier if you let someone help
Carmilla reaches for Laura, Laura spins around facing her angrily
Laura: Did you summon up the ghosts? Â Because thatâs what she said, Elle, that you summoned her up.
Carmilla: I think itâs ... possible.
Laura: Possible? Â How do you not know whether you summoned up the ghosts of your former victims who maybe want some light, refreshing revenge?
Carmilla: Because, it was just something stupid that happened at the therapistâs appointment!
Laura: What?
Carmilla: She ... said I could never move forward unless I dealt with my past, so ... she had me think about Elle and the others, and, you know, there was the usual âmanifest your issuesâ crap, but ... I had completely forgotten about it until my issues actually ... manifested
Laura: And when were you going to share this little piece of information with me?
Carmilla: I was waiting for the right moment.
Laura: You know what wouldâve been a good moment? Â Any time before the ghost of your former lover killed you! Â (starting to cry) Â She killed you. Â I thought she killed you.
Carmilla: Hey [opens arms] come here [Laura embraces her, sobbing against her] Iâm still here. Â OK? Â Iâm still here. Â Weâre gonna get my life back, okay? Â And all those things we want, every single point on your five-year plan, weâre gonna do them, okay? Â Okay, letâs get you out of this thing.
We switch to Mel, Perry, and Kirsch in the study
Perry: Either Emily decoded the spell wrong, or Elle tricked her. Â The spell she did cast used Carmillaâs spark to force the ghosts off to the nightmare land that Emily described.
Mel: You think thatâs where the braniac ended up? Â [Perry nods] Â You think you can get them back?
Perry: I think the real moving-on spell might do it. Â But, that means we only have till sunrise to find the code key. Â [Mel looks out the window at the moon] Â And Iâll need Carmillaâs spark.
Mel: Well, that makes getting the broach back priority number one. Â Hollisâll be chuffed. Â [looking at Perry] Perry, LaFontaine knows youâre looking for them. Â They know. Â Itâs what we do.
Mel slaps Perryâs leg in comfort. Â Perry returns the gesture
Back in the bedroom, Lauraâs in her regular clothes, and Carmillaâs putting on a shirt. Â A humming sound is heard, and Laura flashes to another dream sequence.
Carmilla enters a room, looking very happy, dressed in white
Carmilla: Itâs done! Â We leave tonight. Â In three days, weâll be on an ocean liner headed for New York.
Elle looks less than thrilled. Â She stands up from where she was sitting
Carmilla: Youâre gonna love New York! Â Itâs full of ... concerts, and theater, and ... life. Â Your life life is gonna be so much bigger than you ever imagined!
Elle has now been replaced by Laura. Â Laura!Ell turns aroung to face Carmilla.
Carmilla: Wh-what are you doing?
The humming returns. Â Elle appears creepily sliding up Laura, she takes Lauraâs right hand, a knife now in it, and slices her left palm open.
We suddenly return to the real world, Lauraâs completing the slicing motion
Carmilla: Laura! Â Hey! Â Are you alright?
She looks down and sees Lauraâs palm sliced open.
Laura: What in Stokerâs name is going on?
Time-skip. Perry and Mel are now present. Perry is getting gauze out of a first aid kit while Mel supports Lauraâs hand.
Mel: So Elle can dream-kabob you in real life? Is that a normal ghost thing? Are we supposed to know they could do that?
Laura: Sheâs sent me dreams before. This is the first time sheâs reached out and slashed me.
The camera focuses on Carmilla, looking broodily out the window
Perry: Oh, dear
Laura: No, no, no, no, no. Not âoh dearâ, we do not need an âoh dearâ right now.
The conversation becomes slightly muted, as we hear the sound of beating hearts
Perry: Well, I mean, Iâm still deciphering, but thereâs several spells in this book which might make ghosts much more powerful, especially in the dream world.
The camera shifts back to Laura, Mel, and Perry
Laura: Right, so Elleâs faster, better, stronger. Can we undo that? Use the book to soup ourselves up?
Perry (reading): âSide effects may include ... anxiety, insomnia, dream contagion, and ... deathâ
Laura: So ... no. Wait ... dream contagion? Is that like ... sometimes in the dreams itâs like she canât completely control them, like Iâm seeing things that she wouldnât want me to see. Like just now, I saw you getting ready to leave for New York.
Carmilla: No oneâs going anywhere until we find Charlotte. The Craft here will keep researching. You, Mel, and frat-boy can ... [notices that Kirsch isnât around] Whereâs the frat boy?
Mel: That burrito-chomping, protein-powder-snorting, gullible, mush-brained ...
We see a pile of ash with a sandwich on it
Mel: ... dope.
We pan up to see Carmilla, Perry, Laura, and Mel looking at what used to be Kirsch.
Mel: I told him
Perry: Itâs the same as LaF.
Laura: Okay, we have to find Charlotte and get that broach back before Elle finishes this little re-enactment of And Then There Were None.
External view: The moon in the sky
Laura (voiceover): Search every nook and cranny, Charlotte has to be somewhere
Carmilla: Be careful. Elle knows this place better than we ever will.
We see Laura and Carmilla searching. They enter a room, and Carmilla looks at the books on a mantle. She pulls one out as Laura watches.
Another flasback-dream. Laura (as Elle) lying on Carmillaâs lap as Carmilla reads from a book labelled Le Fanu Poems
Carmilla: âGirls are caterpillars while they live in the world, to be finally butterflies when the summer comes. But in the meantime, there are grubs and larvae, so says Monsieur Buffonâ
Thereâs a thunderclap, and then we see Elle standing behind the couch
Elle: To think of the trouble I went to, [Laura gets up, running for the door] warning you, [Elle blocks her escape thinking youâd learn from my mistake.
Laura: Yeah, cause Carmâs the villain here. Arenât you the one zapping innocent people for no reason?
Carmilla: Iâm doing it to keep whatâs mine.
Laura: That life isnât yours.
Elle: Itâs what Iâm owed. And I wouldnât waste it on some banal five-year plan.
Laura notices LaF drawing some kind of symbol on a mirror.
Laura: LaF?
The dream sequence ends abruptly, Carmillaâs still in the middle of taking the book out
Laura: LaF! I saw LaF!
We skip ahead, Laura sitting on a couch with a pad of paper, Perry and Mel on either side, and Carmilla behind them
Laura: Drawing some sort of symbol, looked like this ... or maybe like this. [Lauraâs drawing two versions of the symbol she saw in her dream]
Mel: How did you get past second grade?
Laura: I saw it for half a second in a ghost-induced nightmare, give me a break.
Carmilla: Any idea what it means?
Perry: No, but if LaF thinks itâs important enough to send from beyond the vale ... if I could just identify it, maybe it could hep decipher the moving-on spell. Iâll try to figure this out, while you guys go get a life.
Laura gets up and moves toward the door
Carmilla (to Mel): Go with her, keep her safe.
Mel: What are you going to do?
Carmilla: Well, young lady stole my life and turned me back into a vampire? So, Iâm gonna remind her what that means.
Mel (to Perry): How about you?
Perry: Oh, Iâve got the EMF. If it so much as chirps, Iâll shriek.
Mel gets up to follow Laura. We see Mel and Laura heading down some stairs, as Perry studies the spell book, and the EMF detector produces static noise, and then starts beeping, Perry looks up.
We switch scenes to Carmilla entering a room, where Elle waits, facing away from the door.
Elle: I used to think you and I would spend our lives reading to each other. If only Iâd known how brief one of those lives was going to be.
Carmilla: Hello, Elle.
Elle: Is that all you have to say to me? After what you did?
Carmilla: I never meant to hurt you.
Elle: Oh, donât apologize. [Elle turns around to face Carmilla] It costs you nothing.
Carmilla: So, what? This is about me paying for my sins?
Elle: You never even stopped to think if you deserved this life. Iâve watched you. All these years. You've never thought of anyone but yourself.
Carmilla: Well, thatâs some big talk coming from the girl who sent her friends to a nightmare land.
Elle: Me? Oh, no, Iâm just thinking about myself. Oh, wait, I wonder who taught me that?
Carmilla rushes at Elle to hit her, but Elle vanishes and reappears by the door.
Elle: Oooh [chuckles] Not very ladylike, Miss Karnstein.
From off screen, Lauraâs scream can be heard
Carmilla: Laura!
Elle: Better run, Carmilla. These old house are so dangerous, after all.
We see Carmilla running with her supser-speed to the study, where Laura and Mel are already present
Laura: Damn it! [camera pans to the pile of ash that used to be Perry, there are various notes around her, the only one that can be seen clearly says â... is a giant trap??â] Perry. You never shouldâve left her alone
Mel: No sign of the spell book, either. [to Carmilla] I take it your little chat with the ghost of girlfriends past was a bust?
Carmilla: Yeah, Iâm getting pretty sick of this haunting crap.
Charlotte: Imagine how we feel. [All three turn around to see Charlotte in the room with them] Iâm wondering if we might be of assistance to each other.
Charlotteâs sitting on a couch with the others around her
Charlotte: Miss Sheridan said you would never go along with the spell if you knew she was with us. I shouldâve known that she only wanted your life for herself. It was all she ever talked about. The wide world that sheâd been denied. As if the same thing hadnât happened to us all. (to Mel) Iâm sorry about your friend. I didnât know what would happen when they pulled me back.
Laura: Can you help us get them back?
Charlotte: I donât know. But we have to stop Miss Sheridan.
Mel: You got any thoughts on the stopping front?
Charlotte: Itâs me she wants, so perhaps ...
Another dream sequence. Laura and Elle are alone in a room. Lauraâs sitting in a chair while Elle approaches her, pulling out a knife.
Laura: Do we really have to do this Nightmare on Elm Street crap?
Elle: Fine [turns around, then turns back, now holding a tray with a tea pot and tea cups, the room gets brighter] Letâs speak as reasonable women. Elle sits down in the chair net to Lauraâs, setting down the tea tray. So. Your friends are trapped beyond the veil. You, Carmilla, and your ... trigger-happy accomplice are next. Sugar?
Laura: ... sure
Elle: But, if you hand over Charlotte, and let me keep this life -
Laura: It isnât yours to keep
Elle: Thatâs beside the point! Let me keep it ... and Iâll bring your friends back. You can all ... leave this place.
Elle hands Laura a tea cup, she accepts it warily
Laura: What happens to Charlotte?
Elle: Well, Iâm afraid poor Charlotte will have to ... follow her sister. But, you know that was always going to happen, so.
Laura: Sheâs just like you. They all are. Donât they deserve a chance to move on?
Elle: Oh! [laughs] Oh, you havenât figured it out yet. The only way that Charlotte and Emily can reach their ... everlasting rest, is if Carmilla sacrifices her human life. [Laura looks shocked] So, letâs not pretend that youâd sacrifice Carmillaâs life for a few wayward spirits, any more than I would.
Laura: You canât just leave them trapped in a nightmare!
Elle: Youâd let your friends die in here to ... help them?
Laura: There has to be another way!
Elle: Ugh! Youâve had your chance. [the room darkens again, thunder cracks] Whatever happens now is your fault.
Lauraâs back in the real world, gasping back to consciousness
Carmilla: Elle? Are you alright? Did she do anything to yo uin the dreamscape?
Laura: No. I just wanna get her out of my head. I wanna get your life back.
Carmilla: Well, we think we can lure her out into the open by using Charlotte as bait.
Laura: Youâd do that for us?
Charlotte: Thereâs only a few hours left of the Ash Moon. If Emily and I want to move on, itâs our only chance.
External shot of mansion, shots of various rooms. We see Charlotte coming down the stairs
Elle: There you are! You know, itâs impolite to cause your host so much trouble.
Charlotte: Iâm sure Iâll find a way to repay you.
Elle grabs Charlotteâs neck, pushing her up against a wall.
Laura appears, followed by Carmilla, and then Mel with her crossbow, surrounding her
Elle: A trap? You arenât serious.
Carmilla: Vampire, warrior, journalist. I like our chances. Letâs have a little chat about taking things that donât belong to us.
Elle: You first
Elle zooms over to Mel, vanishing her into Ash
Charlotte: Mel!
Elle: Best get the broom out. [kicks the pile of ashes, then zooms over to do the same to Charlotte] Look at that. Then there were three. [to Laura] You shouldâve taken up my offer, sweetheart.
Carmilla: Offer?
Elle: Your life for you friends. Donât worry, Laura declined when she discovered that Emily and Charlotte canât move on without destroying your precious spark.
Carmilla: Youâll never be able to enjoy it. Youâll spend the rest of your days looking over your shoulder [Rushes to grab Elleâs arm] Wondering if itâs my step you hear at the door.
Elle attempts to slice Carmilla with her knife, but Carmilla dodges too quickly.
Elle: Iâll take my chances. Iâve got the broach. Thereâs nothing you can do to stop me.
Carmilla: Maybe not. But she knows krav maga.
Elle: What?
Laura grabs Elleâs arm, wrestling the knife out of it, they fight
Laura: Why do people always forget that?
Elle, Laura, and Carmilla fight for the broach. A bright glow appears from teh light, and they all disappear.
Laura appears in a blank white space
Laura: Hello? Carm? Carm! [creepy whispers and howling wind are all we can hear] Pull yourself together, Hollis.
Laura finds herself back in a dream version of the mansion. She sees Carmillaâs rebirthday cake on the same table that theyâd performed the ritual at before. The cake then turns into the broach. Laura picks it up. She hears herself, speaking in a sad, almost-monotone, fashion
Dream!Laura: Oh, crap, weâre live? [Laura turns and sees a version of herself dressed in grey, with a microphone for news 9 (the same as in the âlocal newsâ clips from the beginning). Behind her is a twisted version of her 5-year plan, with all the goals turned into failures] Today, on Toronto News 9, itâs harsh reality. Abandon your childhood dreams for the dubious security of a subpar paycheck. Spend your days glorifying clickbait and your nights letting fear and misery drive away friends and loved ones. Accept that life is an unbroken chain of mediocrity stretching on and on and on. This is Laura Hollis reporting live from a failed career.
Laura notices Elle approaching and runs down the stairs away from her
Elle: I want my life, you little thief! I want my life!
Laura opens a door, and appears in a brightly-lit room with dream!Carmilla and dream!Elle
Laura: Doors are arbitrary. Wonderful
Dream!Carmilla: Oh, youâre gonna love New York. Thereâs theaters and conerts and ... life.
Laura: Wait, I know this. I dreamed this.
Dream!Carmilla: Your life is going to be so much bigger than youâve ever imagined. What are you doing?
We see Dream!Elle taking out a knife. The real Elle appears, grabbing Laura and dragging her out by the ears
Elle: You donât belong here!
Laura runs off, with Elle continuing to follow her.
She appears in another room, with a weeping Emily being held by Charlotte
Dream!Emily: She laughed. Miss Sheridan, she laughed at the very idea of ... Why did I trust her? Why did I not ... I was supposed to keep you safe.
Laura: Oh, God. Poor Emily. Poor Charlotte.
Elle appears in the doorway.
Elle: Do you know what will happen if you die here?
Laura: Let me guess. I die in the real world too
Elle: Worse. Youâll be trapped, in this hell made of dead minds. I wonder if youâll feel so sympathetic then?
Laura: Is that what happened to you?
Elle: I donât want your pity. I want my life! [Elle grabs Laura] I can take it from you living, or I can take it from you dead.
Laura: Youâve seen my dreams. [she kicks Elle in the stomach] Have I ever gone down without a fight?
Laura runs off. She runs into another room, which is the same one from before
Laura: Stuck in an endless loop of someone elseâs damage. Classic me.
Dream!Carmilla: Oh, youâre gonna love New York. Â Thereâs theaters and concerts and ... life.
Laura notices the real Carmilla behind a couch, watching
Laura: Oh, Carm! Carm! [she runs over to real Carmilla]
Dream!Carmilla (partly overlapping with Laura): Your lifeâs gonna be so much bigger than you ever imagined! What are you doing?
Dream!Elle slices her left palm. Dream!Carmilla looks away
Dream!Elle: I met a woman in the village today. She said strange things about you. [Dream!Elle raises her palm, lifting it towards dream!Carmilla] Whatâs wrong? Why wonât you look at me, Carmilla? LOOK AT ME!
Dream!Carmilla looks up, for a brief second, her fangs appear, she hisses and moves towards Elle, before she stops herself. But itâs too late.
Dream!Elle: She was right. Youâre a monster.
Dream!Carmilla: I can explain ...
Dream!Elle: Oh, Iâve heard enough of your lies. All your promises. All your talk of a new life.
Dream!Carmilla: No, not lies, in the colonies, thingsâll be different! No one will know us! Youâll see that!
Dream!Elle: As if I would go anywhere with you now. No. My new friend is waiting in a carriage below. She is going to take me travelling  Sheâll show me the wonders of the world.
Dream!Carmilla is horrified, shaking her head
Dream!Carmilla: No, you canât go with her. Elle, I know, I know I lied, but the horror she has planned for you is much worse than -
Dream!Elle: Worse?! Worse than saying that she loved me ... [whispered] while she drank my blood? [loud] WHILE SHE DRANK MY BLOOD?
Dream!Carmilla (on the verge of tears): Please ...
Dream!Elle: Donât worry. Iâve told her where you are. Sheâll send someone to deal with you.
Dream!Elle leaves the room, as dream!Carmilla falls to her knees sobbing
The camera then pans to Dream!Elle in the room as at the start
Laura: What, is this on repeat? How many times have you watche this?
Dream!Carmilla (entering the room): Itâs done. We leave tonight. In three days, weâll be on an ocean liner headed for New York.
The real Elle appears, Laura and Carmilla hide. Elle leaves
Dream!Carmilla: Youâre gonna love New York Thereâs theaters and concerts and ... life! Oh, your lifeâs gonna be so much bigger than you ever imagined!
Laura leads the real Carmilla out of the room. Theyâre now in a staircase.
Laura: Hey! Hey. Itâs okay. Hey, you are not there anymore. You are here, with me, right now. And I have the broach. [she places the broach in Carmillaâs hand] If you can just ... absorb it. [Nothing happens]
Carmilla: Nothing.
Laura: Â Of course not. Â Of course we still need some stupid spell!Â
Carmilla: Maybe I should give her my life.
Laura: What?  Carm, you canât! Sheâs unhinged!
Carmilla: Not to her ... to them. Laura, everything you saw in there ... itâs everything Iâve been avoiding for years. Pretending like being human meant I didnât do all of those awful things. How is it fair that I get this life while theyâre just trapped here? After everything Iâve done?
Laura: Okay. [sniffles] Okay, [sniffles] A, letâs acknowledge that Ell and your mother share some of this blame, and B, we will figure out another way, a way that doesnât involve you giving up your life.
Carmilla: You mean find a way to avoid responsibility? Mmm-mm [shakes head] You heard Elle, thereâs no other way. Itâs my life for their freedom.
Laura: What about our life together? Our future? Youâre just gonna give up on that?
Carmilla: Laura, Iâm not giving up on that -Â
Laura: Cause, weâre supposed to have arguments over who does dishes, and cupcakes to celebrate big days at work, and grandkids. What is that gonna look like if you can live like youâre 25 forever?
Carmilla: You think I donât want those things, too?
Laura: Please donât give up on our life.
Carmilla: Iâm not giving up. But I canât keep running away. Not after what Iâve done.
Laura: Okay [they kiss, then in barely a whisper:] Thank you. [normal volume] Letâs go save some ghosts
We see Elle, pissed off by the front door.
Laura and Carmilla walk through a passageway. A hooded figure in black passes them by, the same ifgure from the dream where Laura saw Carmilla being lowered into the blood-coffin
Laura: Seriously? People canât just dream about being audited?
They see LaF standing the hallway.
Laura: LaF! [runs to LaF, huggin them] How did you --- ?
LaF: Escape my personal hell? Iâve been through, like, three apocalypses, I can tell the difference.
Laura: Have you found any of the others?
LaF: Funny you should mention that. [LaF opens a door] Iâve been trying to wake her, but she keeps confusing me for ... me.
Perry is watching herself doing paperwork, with Dream!LaF beside her
Dream!Perry: Thatâs form 83-B done. [a pile of papers appears beside Dream!Perry] Just filing a hundred of these daily ...
Dream!LaF: You donât mind taking care of these right? Thereâll be just, like, 5 or 6 million pages. You can do this alone; you donât need me. See you in six years.
Laura wakes the real Perry
Perry: Laura? What are you doing in my ... strangely bureaucratic nightmare?
Laura: Elle zapped us into nightmare land. We have to do the spell before sunrise which is coming up fast.
Perry: Well, I had to read the pages before Elle zapped me, but without the code key to decipher the spell -
LaF (clearing their throat): I've got the code key.
Perry: Oh! Yes, the symbol! Do you have the full thing?
LaF: Uh, yeah, Iâve literally got a photographic memory [LaF points at their cybor ete]
Perry: Oh, I could just kiss you on your robot eye!
Sadly, there is no kiss.
The four walk down a hallway, rescuing others from their dreams
Laura (to Mel): Youâre safe
Kirsch: Why are people always hunting me for sport?
Perry (leading the others to the room where the ritual is to be performed): Okay, circle up. We donât need to hold hands or anything, the spell is much more powerful. But, it might be more cozy that way.
Mel: So, what happens to us after the ghosts move on?
Perry: Oh, um, well, weâll either find ourselves back at the schloss, or cease to exist entirely.
Mel: Itâs better than our usual odds
Emily: Iâm sorry, not to criticize any plan that would clearly be so much to our benefit, but ...
Charlotte: Doesnât that mean you have to give up your human life?
Carmilla: Yeah. Well, Iâm responsible for what happened to you, so ... this is how I can help.
Carmilla sets the broach down. It turns into Carmillaâs rebirthday cake.
Kirsch: Woah, what happened to the, uh ...
Laura: Itâs a cake now. Donât ask.
Kirsch: Okay.
Carmilla: Alright, uh, letâs get this ritual started before I change my mind.
Perry pulls out a piece of paper and starts chanting in an foreign language. Carm leans over, to blow out the candles on the cake, when Elle suddenly grabs her from behind with a knife
Laura: Carm!
Elle: You think Iâm gonna let you do this? Steal everything from me again?!
Laura: But Carm really isnât the one who you blame for that, is she? Iâve seen that moment between you two over and over again. You had everything that you ever wanted and you gave it up because you were afraid.
Elle: They lied to me. Carmilla, her mother, they betrayed and murdered me!
Laura: Youâre right, it isnât fair what happened to you, but thatâs not an excuse. Everything that youâre doing right now, hurting everyone else, hurting yourself, itâs just because youâre afraid of what comes next, but you donât have to be. We can help you, we can help you find the peace youâve always been looking for!
Elle: No! No, I donât want your platitudes! I want my -Â
Elle is suddenly stopped by an arrow shot by Mel
Mel: Your life. You want your life. Yeah, we know. But itâs not all about you. And youâre a part of this. So, stay put.
Elle slides to the ground, injured, the arrow in her shoulder
Carmilla: Nice shot!
Mel: Iâve been waiting to do that since we got here
Laura and Carmilla embrace. The circle is reformed, as Elle sits quietly in the background
LaF: So, youâre kinda rocking the fieldwork these days, hunh? Think if we got more admin help, youâd be able to come out more?
Perry: I think I could ... find some time to play.
Charlotte (to Emily): Weâre almost free of all this
Emily: You shouldnât have been drawn into it to begin with.
Charlotte: It was 1872. If we hadnât been killed by vampires, it wouldâve been, I donât know, tuberculosis?
Laura: Oddly specific
Charlotte: Each day was made better because you tried to make it such. I donât regret a thing. [to Mel] Thank you for the dance. I wish there could be another, but ...
Mel: I get it. You gotta leave with the one that brung you.
Charlotte: Would you like to ... ?
Mel: Obviously.
Charlotte and Mel kiss. Everyone looks happy for them, except Elle who just looks annoyed by the delay
Elle: Ugh, can we please just move on already?
Perry resumes the spell. Carmilla blows out the candles, all but one.
Someone: Ah, itâs working!
Charlotte and Emily vanish in glowing sparkles, followed by Elle. Then Mel and Kirsch vanish, followed by LaF and Perry, leaving just Laura and Carmilla.
Carmilla: What the hell now?
Laura: I guess with all the ghosts gone, thereâs no reason for this place to exist anymore. So ... it worked. Hooray. [looking at Carmilla] Sorry about before. I think Iâve been so focused on chasing after your life cause it seemed a lot easier than trying fixing my own.
Carmilla: Hey, youâre Laura Hollis. [chuckles] And Iâve watched you fight vampires ... and gods and even that lady who tried to butt us in line at the craft fair. [they bloth laugh] So, youâre gonna figure it out. Whatever happens next, weâre gonna do it together.
Carmilla prepares to blow out the remaining candle
Laura: If this goes Romeo and Juliet on us, Iâm totally gonna haunt your ass.
Carmilla: Of course you are.
They kiss, and then Carmilla blows out the remaining candle.
They find themselves lying on the floor, sunlight coming, holding hands.
Laura: Well, that was a kick.
Lauraâs walkie-talkie beeps
Perry (on walkie talkie): Where are you guys?
LaFÂ (on walkie talkie): Is everyone okay, over?
Laura: Affirmative. Laura and Carm A-OK. Over.
Laura and Carmilla get up
LaF: Front doorâs unlocked
Perry: Oh! Meet you outside
LaF: Youâre supposed to say over
Perry: Over.
Carmilla: Letâs get the hell out of Styria.
Laura and Carmilla walk out of the schloss, joining the rest. Kirsch hands them their bags.
Kirsch: I call dibs on window!
Montage: Walking down the path, then taking a train, then a plane landing, then back to Toronto. The group is having a picnic, and we see Danny in the background talking to Kirsch. Laura and Carmilla are sharing a bottle of champagne
Carmilla (holding champagne bottle as if microphone): And, how does it feel, Ms. Hollis, to officially be a freelance journalist at large?
Laura: I made a huge mistake! What have I done? I quit my job! I gave up my cubicle! I donât have a plan! Whatâm I supposed to do without a plan? [Laura starts laughing, joined by Carmilla] Only about half of that was actual panic, so pretty good, right?
Carmilla: Yeah. Iâm just gonna go get some blood, babe.
They kiss. The camera pans over to LaF and Perry, looking at some kidn of electronic device.
LaF: So ... this is a blueprint?
Perry: Yep, these are the blueprints they sent over. And, oh, check this out. They have an industrial-sized cleaning closet, and I was thining we could put your reactor over here in this corner.
LaF: That is a beautiful thing.
Carmilla: Selling out going smoothly?
LaF: Uh, weâre retaining executive control over LaFerry at Intrigue. And theyâre giving us a thorium reactor. A thorium reactor!
The camera pans over to Kirsch and Danny
Kirsch: It was really scary.
Danny: It sounds a little cushy.
Kirsch: But it was a totally legit adventure. You know, there were ghosts and this haunted mansion and then, you know, this weird netherworld
Danny: And comfy beds and midnight snacks, and a masquerade ball
Kirsch: Look, I even have that mark where I was ghost-zapped. Look. No, seriously look!
Danny: No, I see it
Kirsch: Itâs there, look!
Danny: Okay, I see it, you can put it away now.
The camera pans over to Mel. Lauraâs standing by her, with a sympathetic look
Mel: Okay, donât give me pity eyes, Hollis. Like you never had a crush on a dead girl.
Laura: That does sound familiar.
They touch foreheads
Mel: Thanks
Laura walks over to Carmilla
Laura: So, Carmilla Karnstein, a vampire again. Whatâs next?
Carmilla: Iâm thinking ... maybe my PhD in Philosophy. Hey, attend university for 70-odd years, and you rack up a few credits.
Laura: Iâm so proud of you.
Carmilla: Youâre not worried about how weâll spend our lives together?
Laura: I figure any two people in a relationship, their lives move at different speeds. That isnât the part that matters. This, here, right now. This is what matters. And I love you.
Carmilla: I love you too.
They kiss, and then look at the cityscape together as the credits begin
Credits scenes
Montage of various scenes of Laura reporting from various locations
Laura: Iâm Laura Hollis and this is a web exclusive for Creampuffington Post. Weâre talking today with veteran dragonslayer Elizabeth Spielsdorf about the great apocalypse of 2015
Laura: Hi, Iâm Laura Hollis on assignment in Graz where weâre just in time for the ribbon cutting ceremony on the JP Armitage Memorial Library
Laura: Iâm Laura Hollis reporting live from the Geneva Summit on the Rights of Were-People
Laura: Iâm Laura Hollis reporting to you live from Iceland where scientists have made a breakgthrough discovery of the first drinkable Fountain of Youth
Laura: A scandal brewing tonight on the steps of the capital as the President, who last month was revealed to be an as-yet unidentified species of lizard creature with very small hands, refuses to produce his long-form hatching certificate. This is senior correspondent Laura Hollis for MSSSN-BCD
Credits roll. Pictures of Laura and Carmilla with a baby
Post-Credits scene
Laura and Carmilla asleep in bed. Carmilla wakes up. She yawns, and gets up, walking to the kitchen. She opens the fridge and pulls out a bottle of hemo-soy. Mattie shows up
Carmilla: Hey, Mattie.Â
Mattie: Hey, sis.
Carmilla: Why are you ...
Mattie: Back from the underworld and lounging in your charmingly Bohemian pied-a-terre?
Carmilla: For starters.
Mattie: You and I and the little ingÊnue that could are going on a road trip. Turns out the anglerfish was female. Before it died, it laid eggs. Just an alarming number of eggs.
Carmilla takes a sip of hemo-soy
Carmilla: Alright, letâs get going.
Title card reading âTo be continued ...?












