Episode 80

No, these aren’t dancing fics, I just adore @bluebellofbakerstreet and @fandomtrumpshate.

ONE-SHOTS:

Cupid’s Venom by SilentAuror: Only technically a one-shot–@silentauroriamthereal always gives lavishly! Sherlock plunges into studies of toxins and Greek mythology, when Mike Stamford says he wishes he’d been able to be John and Sherlock’s Cupid. 29,551 luscious words.

Welcome Distractions by ArwaMachine: Phone sex. It’s @arwamachine. You know what to do. 14,762 words.

changing tides by simplyclockwork (@simplyclockwork ) Sherlock relapses, and John steps up. Sherlock finally realizes that he suffers from loneliness, not just the boredom of a superior mind underchallenged in the real world. 5984 words.

Something we do by Pengwing (Myriath) ( @myriath​ on Tumblr) Waking up together in bed changes everything. 911 words.

A Better Man Than He by  CopperBeech: Everything @copperplatebeech writes lifts me up. This ACD-era revisiting of A Scandal in Bohemia is delicious, surprising, nourishing and so very deft. 7975 words.

No Regrets by Calais_Reno. Locked in a refrigerated warehouse, Sherlock and Lestrade play a game of deductions. (Don’t quitcher day job just yet, Greg.) 2133 words.

Indulgence by NovaNara (@imnova on Tumblr) Anent that frosted glass door between Sherlock’s bedroom and the bath: “If Sherlock indulges himself in some harmless (what John doesn’t know won’t upset him), quiet (and that’s way more difficult ) voyeurism, it’s fine, surely?” 1309 words.

COMPLETED FICS: 

John’s Headache by BakerTumblings. John Watson has some vague symptoms - that land him in a potentially dangerous situation. 24,342 words; 9/9.

A Rock, An Island by stopthat. What if John really got through to Sherlock before the Fall, and went off with him instead of being left behind? 5226 words, 4/4.

Too Many Mornings by mom2boys (@momma2boys on Tumblr): This fic needs to come with a warning, so here it is: it’s like being hit sideways by a silent train, and I’m not entirely certain I’ll ever be the same again. 2500 words, 2/2.

Oblivion by AlgySwinburne  @algyswinburne does a magnificent fix-it to John’s Letter in TST. Molly and Sherlock get plastered first. To forget. 8688 words, 5/5.

By the Bi by emilycare @keirgreeneyes lovingly welcomes OFMD to 221B. “Pirates!” Sherlock yelped. “Why didn’t you tell me it was about pirates, John?” 7,042 words; 3/3.

After Five Years He Still Grieves by AlwaysJohn shredded my heart in the most masterful  fashion. Sherlock’s been gone for five years, and grief is killing John,  in a gradual slide into a melancholy so profound that he had no energy to fight. 23,351; 12/12. When you need a good cry.

And one non-Sherlock bonus:

Lift Me Up, O Lord by CopperBeech. A Good Omens fic that–like everything @copperplatebeech writes–made me pound the kudos button chapter after chapter. Human AU: Olympic lifter Aziraphale, distance runner Crowley. 37,134 words, 14/14.

NEW WIPS (at least, I don’t think I’ve recced them yet)

The Last Envoy by Calais_Reno: @calaisreno hits all my pleasure centers with an innovative homage to The Left Hand of Darkness. April 1938. As Europe moves towards another war, a lonely envoy arrives from a distant, dying planet. 13,298 words; 2/18. Updates weekly. 

Persistence 2 by  JaneOfCakes: A year after John and Sherlock’s wedding life is entirely perfect, until Sherlock calls John from Bart’s one day and everything goes sideways in a second. How will John pick up the pieces after The Fall? It isn’t how you think. 9914 words; 3/14.

Apotheosis by Callie4180: London is alive, a living, breathing city, and she is beautiful and vibrant and perfect in her imperfections, and she and Sherlock are the same, now. 5941 words; 4/10. Updates weekly.

Forever Yours by FawnHickory, Myst1248: Part 5 of @fawnhickory‘s A Good Man and an Angry Man series, which started with a 572-word one-shot in which Greg reads John the riot act for what he did in the morgue. 11,718 words; 7/? Updates briskly.

L'amour Toujours by stopthat: Sherlock and John must go undercover—as two men in love—to find out who has been mercilessly executing the Wysteria Lutheran Church’s queer community. 22,211 words; 18/?

Dancing Tweet to Tweet by Enterthetadpole, Tindomerelhloni. Part 4 of the series Baker Tweet Boys by @enterthetadpole and @tindomerelhloni-official. 32,229 words; 7/? Updates weekly.

* * *

So this is the prompt I chose to start a new AU series for @strangelock221b‘s commissions of a ten fic series. It’s a modern setting AU, set in the world of private investigators and PIs. Some people have similar jobs, some don’t, but generally the Sherlock and Star Trek characters all know each other. And while it’s not evident, it’s set in the US. So please, Enjoy!

(Also, AO3 link and Series Page will be added tomorrow, when AO3 is back up)

Setting Up The Office (A “Bones McCoy, Private Investigator” Story) - Kirk has reservations about McCoy becoming a private investigator…as well as his choice in help.

Read @ AO3 | Series Page | Buy Me A Coffee? | Commission Me?

Kirk looked around the offices of Leonard McCoy, Private Investigator. “Are you sure about this? Like, really really sure?”

McCoy nodded, looking at the walls. It was kind of a moot point having an actual office when so much of what he did could be contracted for online. But there was just something…classic…about a private investigator having an office. Not that he would ever admit he read all that crime noir trashy lit, but there was that component in this equation. “Molly’s going to help.”

Kirk let out a low whistle, shaking his head. “Holmes is going to kill you.”

“Holmes is a jerk,” McCoy said with a shrug. “And besides, he dumped her. Over cell phone, if I remember her drunken ramblings correctly.”

“Yeah, that didn’t go over well in the precinct, her going to your place after he sent her that text. But then he thought you two were screwing around anyway.”

“Like I’d cheat!” Molly yelled from the front office. “Hypocritical oaf of a man.”

“Holmes didn’t cheat on you!” McCoy called out to his best friend. The female one, because the male one was looking amused as hell.

“Not with a woman or a bloke, but with that promotion he did!” Molly huffed that out as she came into the office. “Used me to help him study and then he said he was too bloody busy.”

“Well, as a detective, he–” Kirk stopped talking when Molly glared at him and raised his hands. “Shutting up now.”

“Smart move, Jim,” she said. She crossed her arms. “And what does it matter to Sherlock what I do now? He’s written me off.”

“Because he’s still in love with you,” McCoy said, picking up his license from the box he’d carried into the office hours ago.

“Well, he can piss off because I am no longer in love with him.” She moved to the box and began rummaging around.

“Molly? Personal space?” Kirk asked.

“Bugger off. Leonard has all the nameplates in here,” she murmured. Finally, she pulled one out and her gaze softened. “Leonard, there’s a rose on it.”

“Just because it’s professional doesn’t mean it can’t be pretty. That’s why it’s on pink marble.”

“I swear, you are too good to me.” She leaned across the desk and grabbed the belt of his jeans, pulling him to the edge of the desk so she could kiss his cheek. Then she let go and made her way to the outer office.

“No, Holmes had no reason to think you were in love with his girlfriend,” Kirk deadpanned.

“I’ve known her longer, so we’re…close.” McCoy shrugged. “Remember, if we hadn’t decided to drop out of med school together, you wouldn’t know either of us.”

“When are you going to admit you’re head over heels for her?” Kirk asked, smirking.

“When you tell your partner you’re madly in love with him,” McCoy said, returning the smirk with his own and watching as it was Kirk’s turn to glare.

“Fuck off,” Kirk said. McCoy chuckled at the look on his face. His old partner was pissed as hell. “You said you wouldn’t mention it.”

“Around others, yeah,” McCoy said, Finally he set the license against the wall. “Looks good here, doesn’t it?”

“I guess,” Kirk said, his glare fading into a pout.

“Whatever goes on between you and T’Gai is your business, unless you tell me, but then it stays between us,” McCoy said. “I know while the force is more open it’s weird for there to be gay partners.”

“I’m pan, thank you,” Kirk said. “Look…back to what we were talking about before, are you sure this is a good idea? I mean, you won’t…freeze?”

“Look, I’m still seeing Ella on a weekly basis. That didn’t stop even though I was put out to pasture.”

“Medically retired,” Kirk said.

“Put out to pasture,” McCoy reiterated. “Anyway, point is, I plan on being careful. No situations where I get shot again. I even plan on going to the range with your dumb ass on a more regular basis.”

Kirk shook his head. “Yeah, but…Molly? I mean, if she’s still hung up on Holmes, things could get ugly. He’s the hotshot detective now and there’s times you’re going to cross paths. It could be bad news.”

“I’ll deal with it if it happens but thanks for worrying,” McCoy said before setting down his license and reaching over to clap Kirk on the shoulder. “Now. Make yourself useful and hand me a hammer and a nail?”

Star Trek creatures drawn by Vanessa Chacon a.k.a. Atolm.  More images and information at source.

Unnamed Talosian captive

Aldebaran serpent

Klingon targ

Rectyne monopod

Tholian harpy

Two-headed Malgorian

Corvan gilvo

Screech rhino

Sheliak pseudobeast

i, your resident costume designer, am here to resolve the starfleet pockets debate once and for all.

Let’s do some establishing, hm?

We begin chronologically, with Enterprise. I have but one thing to say about Enterprise, which is…

Um, pockets! Pockets pockets pockets pockets pockets. Pockets. Damn, when you say it that many times it starts to sound weird. The Enterprise costumes were designed by Rob Blackman, who also worked on Next Gen, Voyager, and Deep Space Nine. (and just like that, I understand how those skintight jumpsuits for T’Pol, Troi, and Seven happened :/)

An argument could be made that all those pockets (and let’s be real here, I would kill to have that many nice pockets on an outfit) also show how early the time period is. In fact, this was a intentional choice by the producers. Payoff? Not sure. 

Let’s evaluate his other work, shall we?

Here are some photos from what I believe to be seasons five, six, and seven of Next Generation, which is what Blackman worked on, as well as a few from earlier seasons. It’s pretty hard to tell whether or not Picard has pockets in that pants and jacket uniform, but if I had to wager a guess I’d say that he doesn’t. And the lower picture- y’know how I know there aren’t any pockets on those?

oofahh. that one really burns. So no, there weren’t pockets in TNG. There are a few uniform variants that I think would seriously benefit from some pockets, especially the top two pictures of Picard’s variants, but in the end I think it was alright. Except those holders. They can choke.

NEXT!

Ah, Voyager. In my opinion, they really pulled off the ordinary uniforms. 

In times of trouble, this exact picture of Captain Janeway comes to me with words of wisdom. Not to mention the dress uniform- they did a pretty good job on those, too.

Personally, I would’ve shortened the length of the tunics, but that’s a me thing. No pockets. But now, a list of Voyager costumes that can fling themselves out an airlock for all I care:

Ah, Seven of Nine. Definitely no pockets on that monstrosity. But I recently learned that they specially built a contraption to hold the fabric between her breasts in. I might make a post later about our holy trinity of screwed-over female Star Trek characters. Later. 

wHAT ARE THOSE FASTENERS?! I digress. No pockets.

If anyone could’ve pulled off pockets, I think it’d be Neelix. But no. There were no pockets on Voyager.

ONWARDS TO THE SPACE STATION

I’m really gonna breeze through Deep Space Nine because most of their uniforms were already covered.

No pockets. (I desperately want Jake’s purple velour jumpsuit, though)  So I think it’s safe to say that there were no pockets in the 24th century Starfleet uniforms, the only exceptions I could find being a variant of Pulaski’s tunic which was later removed, and an overcoat for B’Elanna that was designed to hide the actress’s pregnancy. And for the most part, I’m okay with that. I do, however have issues with a few things- namely, the way they tried to compensate with fasteners in TNG. And I won’t be reviewing any of the movies, because A) I’m pretty sure they didn’t have pockets either and B) that’s Too Much.

BACKWARDS!

You know how I know there weren’t pockets in TOS? Because that’s how this debate got started. It was specifically noted during the production. And I do agree with many of the points Team No Pockets makes- there’s no need for wallets, and everything else goes on that nice little belt that they did Much Better than TNG. Behold:

They were literally velcroed on. #respect.

So that’s it, you say. Starfleet uniforms didn’t have pockets, and Enterprise’s United Earth ones just served as a visual time placer, right?

Not quite, I’m afraid. Team Pockets has a hero, and her name is Gersha Phillips. Know what Gersha Phillips did? Gersha Phillips did pockets.

See those stripey things on the pants? Those are pockets. Nice ones, too, given that Jason Isaacs just stuck his phone in there for a photo shoot. There’s no chance that i could fit my phone into most of my pockets. I’m very jealous.

Somewhere in the early 2260s, it seems like Starfleet bid farewell to the pocket. Since we’re seeing the Enterprise in Disco S2, I’ll be on the lookout for pockets on Constitution Class uniforms.

Conclusion:

Another week of awesome episodes lies ahead! Our cover art this week is by the fantasic @bluebellofbakerstreet. 

For Miniseries March, the spring challenge from the fine folks who bring us Fall TV Season Sherlock: a fusion of BBC Sherlock and (naturally, you’ve been dreaming of this for years) Trapper John, MD.

(Actually, it’s an AU post TRF. You don’t have to know ANYTHING about Trapper John, I promise.)

This is a four chapter fic that will be updating weekly on Fridays. I hope you enjoy it…

http://archiveofourown.org/works/13911159/chapters/32014662

Here’s the debut TV Guide cover for the Sherlock/Star Trek crossover miniseries Sher Trek, now at AO3 as part of the 2017 Miniseries April season at  @falltvseasonsherlock.

Cover art by the fabulous @reapersun. Reaper darling, thank you so very much for finding the time to do this!

At AO3:

Sher Trek Episode 1, “A Study in Darkness”

Sher Trek Episode 2, “The Denevan Problem”

Sher Trek Episode 3, “Sh’lok’s Brain”

Sher Trek Episode 4, “Amok Sign”

And posting now as part of the 2018 Miniseries March season: