where good ideas go to die

I passed a flower shop next to a tattoo shop and at first I laughed because I thought it was ironic and then i freaked because IMAGINE YOUR OTP IN A FLORIST/TATTOO ARTIST AU

OMG I COULD TOTALLY IMAGINE THEM LIKE THAT IT WOULD BE SO PERFECT

hey bestie you forgot the poll

I was talking to prev, asshole. The fucking critter-creature-beast poll blog? That person? Don't be a fucking dickhead.

sorry for being silly on my post it wont happen again

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My friend really changed once she became a vegetarian 

its like ive never seen herbivore

i sighed so loud my mom asked me if i was okay and she’s two rooms away

Victor Frankenstein after achieving the impossible and building a fucking person from scraps of the dead: Oh god, ew, ew it's ugly! Yucky! Yucky! Gross! Ew! Ew! Yucky! Yucky! Gross! Ew!

*packing my suitcase for a 3 day trip* hm, but what if I need my terracotta warriors..

girl it’s just a 3 day trip, you do not need to bring your terracotta warriors 🙄

ive never wanted to send a death threat over a game before

tautological wordle answer

posts that make you open wordle

Oh boy better go try today’s wordle

WHAT THE FUCK

The “Thunk” will always kill me.

14/10 doing his best

People who think sheep are killed for their wool are so hilarious to me. Does your barber slit your throat whenever you get a haircut?? Are you a returning customer to Sweeney Todd? Lmao it grows back, fools.

This is completely ignoring the fact that the sheep's soul is stored in its wool. So sure, the body remains, but the spirit, the essence of the sheep, that's gone forever, and then as the wool regrows a new soul moves in.

What

Same for me, I get a new soul with every haircut. That's why my personality changes so much.

Tumblr citizenship means being completely unsure if the person posting about sheep souls is being 100% serious or is just taking the piss.

THEY TAKE THEIR PISS TOO?!?!?

Yup, stockpiling it in giant buckets to pour on the poor

if i was a soccer player i'd simply kick that ball in the goal instead of wasting everyone's time

I WISH IT HAD ALL BEEN DIFFERENT!!!!!