Mackenzie

My man in a backwards hat and slight smell of whisky 😅

I had two crazy dreams last night one of them that really made me think. I had three sexual relationships before my husband. All being sexual relationships I was not really perusing, I wasn’t enjoying. I didn’t know what I was doing. I didn’t know how to touch a man neither was I really committed to learning. Now that I think about it my husband has been the only man I have wanted to please. I wanted to spend time to get to understand what I was doing. I find myself often stressed about being inexperienced and nervous to try new things. But why is that pressure there. Why do we put such extreme pressure on ourself to be perfectly sexually experienced. Now that I sit and think about it I kind of like the thought that when I do do try something new it’s with my husband and not just something I’ve done repeatedly with everyone I’ve been with. Honestly the same goes for myself, I never knew what I liked or enjoyed. It has taken me this long to start to understand what I really do like but I am also really enjoying that it’s with my husband. It’s also nice to know that he doesn’t take everything super seriously so if something doesn’t quite work out I don’t have a feeling of shame about it. Just after dream thoughts.