MR BRIGHTSIDE

I can try to get it arranged.

Thanks, I really appreciate it. I'm Caleb, what's your name?

There can be if you’d like.

I would like food, yeah.

I really don’t want to take all these decorations down alone. If anyone wants to help, feel free to.

I want to help. Will there be food at the end?

Well Shane is usually in control of her mind and body and I’m usually in the background for the most part but if I want to come out and play, I will.

So which one of you is better at Rock Band?

You see, the girl you’re looking at is Shane. However, the girl talking to you— me, hi, is Veronica. I’m Shane’s alter. Personally, I like to think of myself as her other half but we’ll stick with alter for now.

That's something you don't hear everyday. Well, it's nice to meet you, Veronica. I'm Caleb. How does that whole alter thing work?

Hm, that’s a somewhat complicated question.

Elaborate.

I will hit you. I will not hesitate to hit you.

[He laughs.] Okay, damn. I wasn't actually going to touch your boogers. What's your name?

But I don’t need your fingers my nose.

I'm not gonna shove my fingers up your nose. It's hanging out, I just need to yank it.

No thanks, I think a tissue will do just fine.

My hands are as soft as tissues.

I’m not sticking my fingers near your mouth. Sorry.

And to think I was going to pick that booger for you.

Yeah, well— you have something in your teeth.

Geez, do I really? Do you mind getting it out for me?

Um, I do not.

Oh but you do. You better pick it before some cute guy sees it.

Why wouldn’t you?

Because you've got a booger sticking out of your nose.

….What….

Yup, he just flew in and dropped you on the ground.

As would I. Although I feel rather biased, seeing as she is my daughter.

It'll also help if she's a cute newborn. 

Oh, please. Only in your dreams.

Psh, and why would I dream about you?