illi 𖧧

years of whispers in crowded school hallways, giggles between girls at the lockers beside yours, even you fell victim to that famed harrington charm when he passed you in the hallways, sending you a brief smile on occasion if your eyes ever met in a fleeting glance.

but you never had the pleasure of really knowing steve in high school, you just had the whispers and rumors and occasional 'hi' if you passed each other in the hallway.

four years of school together and steve harrington never seemed to spare you anything more than a quick glance in the sea of students flooding the hallways of hawkins high.

that was, until the day you walked into family video, searching for something to watch in hopes of filling up some of the spare time you'd had since graduating high school.

as you had headed for the stand where all the new releases waited, you noticed him — or specifically, his hair.

he had been standing behind the counter, dressed in a striped blue and white polo with that dark green family video vest sitting over it. his hair had been what made you recognize him, but you could also it was a little different — longer, definitely, and a little messier than in high school, like he wasn't trying as hard to style it anymore.

he was talking with a girl behind the counter with him, the both of them lost in a fit of giggles, too invested in their conversation to notice a customer had even entered the store.

you weren't bothered, instead you just began browsing the shelves. your fingertips danced along the plain covers, reading each title with a sigh before you found yourself in the romance section, reaching for a copy of grease, because nothing was better than a film you had already seen more times than you could count.

that was the moment steve harrington had noticed you. he stopped mid-sentence in whatever he had been saying to his co-worker and stumbled around the counter to head towards the romance section, running a hand through his hair and adjusting his vest so it sat a little neater on his shoulders, not that he had expected you to find the vest attractive in any way.

when he was just a few steps behind you, he cleared his throat and leaned against the shelf of tapes with his most charming smile. you jumped at the sudden sound, and spun around to come face-to-face with steve himself.

"oh!" you had gasped, still clutching grease to your chest, and for a moment steve had just stared, like he was a malfunctioning robot for about 10 seconds before he snapped himself out of it.

"uh," he cleared his throat again, curling his hand into a fist and using it to cover his mouth before he smiled again. "hi. can i help you find anything?"

the corner of your mouth twitched upwards before curling into a full smile. this wasn't quite the steve harrington you knew of from high school, there was something different. he seemed a little less cocky and sure of himself, a little less overly confident. you could hear it in his tone, see it in his smile.

"hi," you greeted cheerfully, then lifted the vhs tape in your hand. "just looking for some movies to rent."

"oh, yeah. well, it's a good thing we've got plenty of those here." steve chuckled, then squeezed his eyes shut to curse at himself silently, as if scolding himself for his not-so-smooth delivery just to state the obvious.

but then you laughed, a small chuckle, and steve opened his eyes again to meet yours.

"that is a good thing, huh?" you spoke, your smile still pulling at your lips as the words left them. "i'm not really sure what to pick, though. do you have any recommendations?"

steve's eyes went wide and his posture straightened immediately, like he hadn't expected to get this far in your conversation. "uh, recommendations? pssh— yeah, totally. what kinda thing are you in the mood for?"

you then spent the next ten minutes following him around the store as he pointed out a few different titles in almost every genre, though some of which he had admitted to you he hadn't seen, only to then suggest for the two of you to watch it together.

you had laughed lightly, not in a mean way, but almost flustered, a little unsure on how to answer. but the answer wasn't a no, you knew that much.

you had always thought steve harrington was handsome, and, yeah, maybe there had been a few times in high school where you had fantasized about being one of the girls he would hold hands with down the halls and take on dates around town, but you didn't want something with steve if it was just going to be a one-time date, or some shitty hook-up. you wanted something more, because that was what you had been searching for.

and that turned out to be pretty perfect, because steve had been searching for something more, too.

by the end of that month, steve harrington was your boyfriend, and you were his girlfriend, and you could've sworn life was perfect.

for a short while, at least.

toward the end of march, he disappeared.

not literally, and not entirely, but just enough for it to be noticeable.

the night before spring break, you had gone to hawkins high school’s championship basketball game in support of steve’s friends: lucas sinclair, who was on the basketball team, and robin buckley, who played in the school band.

then that night he drove you home, kissed you outside your front door, and promised he’d come by the next night to stay with you while your parents went out of town for the break.

he didn’t turn up.

you waited all night, perched on the edge of the couch, eyes drifting from the television and across the room to the phone on the wall, willing it to ring and hoping to hear steve’s voice telling you he was just running late and would be there in 15 minutes.

you didn’t see him again until a couple days later, the morning after the earthquake.

you didn’t sleep all night, you had been terrified. you watched houses you drove past almost daily being ripped apart, sirens wailed outside filling the usual quiet nights in hawkins with horror.

the town had been on fire, smoke billowing from every corner, and you had no idea where steve was.

when the knock on your door came early the next morning, your mouth felt dry and your stomach flipped, because you were somehow fearing the worst.

but when you pulled the door open to see steve, relief rolled over your body like a wave and you practically launched yourself into him, arms circling around his neck like you always would, only this time he winced.

gently, his hands came to your hips and he carefully pulled himself back, making your brows furrow and your mouth twist into a frown.

“you okay?” you asked softly, immediately concerned, and he nodded, though you noticed the way one hand hovered over his middle like he was shielding it.

your eyes flicked up and down his body, taking him in. there were scratches covering his face, and an unfamiliar tiredness behind his eyes, sunken in a way you could only compare to grief.

around his neck, poking out from beneath the collar of his polo, was a dark, angry red line, bruising and scarring the skin just beneath his throat.

“jesus christ, steve, what happened?” you gasped, fingertips reaching up to trace the mark gently, and he forced a smile.

“you should see the other guy.” he joked, but you didn’t smile. your eyes dropped back down to his waist, right where his hand still sat not-so-subtly.

you grabbed his hand and tugged him into the house, forcing him to sit on the couch and you rolled up his shirt to examine whatever he was hiding from you.

a large, white bandage circled his middle, faint red stains coating some of the fabric on each of his sides, and you looked up at him.

“steve, what the hell happened to you?” you asked, and he brushed you off, pushing his shirt back down and pulling you up onto the couch to sit on his lap.

“‘s fine, baby. i promise, i’m fine.” he told you, his eyes searching yours as his hands circled your waist and pulled you in closer. “just got a little held up. sorry i didn’t come by the other night.”

you sighed, but then leaned your head forward to press it against his forehead, kissing him softly, and steve relaxed against you immediately.

“it’s okay. i’m just glad you’re okay, stevie.” you mumbled against his shoulder, burying your face into his neck. “when you didn’t show up, then with all these murders… i got scared.”

“i know, honey, i’m sorry.” he squeezed you tighter, kissing your head. “i missed you so much, god, you don’t even know.”

and the two of you sat like that on your couch from what could’ve been anything from 5 minutes to 5 hours, and you were unaware that this was the beginning of something much bigger than the two of you.

—

six months into hawkins’ government issued quarantine, and things were already much more different than you realized.

you had moved in with steve. maybe it was a little soon, considering you had only been together for about 9 months, but his parents had skipped town before the quarantine was set in place, and he hated being alone.

he worked at the wsqk radio station now, still paired with his best friend robin, but now every night he came home to you.

at least, he used to.

he’d call you before he left for work, asking if you needed him to pick anything up on his way home in this strangely domestic way that made you forget you were just a couple of 20 year olds who had only been together for a year, it made you feel like he was forever. he was your future.

he’d step into the house and drop his keys by the door, the clatter echoing across the first floor before he’d find you, and his hands would be on you in an instant.

arms around your waist, pulling you into a hug, or onto his lap. his lips would meet yours, or his face would end up buried in your neck, depending on how his day went.

but he’d always come home to you, he’d grip onto you like you were the only thing worth holding on to, and he’d whisper that he loved you repeatedly, like it were a prayer.

that’s what made it noticeable when he began pulling away.

at first it was subtle; maybe he wouldn’t call before driving home, or he’d head upstairs and shower before coming downstairs to curl onto the couch with you. it was easy enough to brush off as a bad day.

but then there were those strange nights as the months passed. the nights when he’d come home unexplainably late, sometimes in the early hours of the morning when you were already asleep in his bed, arm reaching across his empty side of the bed as you awaited his return, even in sleep.

when he’d get home, you’d wake up to the sound of him shuffling around the room, shrugging off his jacket, unbuckling his belt, and soon climbing into bed beside you, pulling the covers over his body and pressing his chest up against your back, letting his arm slide around your middle as he'd leave a gentle kiss on the back of your neck.

you’d ask him about it in the morning, why he got home after midnight, and he'd tell you it was because of work.

you didn't know whether or not to believe him, because who works all night at a radio station? but other than that, he never really gave you a reason to be suspicious of anything, because he'd always be by your side again.

that was until november of 1987.

—

he's pulling away, you can feel it. you've been feeling it for the last month at least, maybe even longer. you can't remember exactly how long it's been since you'd noticed, but ever since you noticed, it's been all you can see.

he doesn't cling to you anymore. no hands on your hips while you're cooking in the kitchen, no pulling you onto his lap after work, no phone calls "just 'cause he misses you" no kisses on the back of your neck in the middle of the night. there hasn't even been any sex.

it's like there's been a stranger in your shared bed each night. he still sleeps beside you, but he's not close to you anymore. he doesn't hold you; he just lies on his back and stares up at the ceiling with wide eyes, as if he's lost deep in his thoughts.

when you ask, he just tells you he's busy with work, that he's been helping his friends with things, that he's "just tired".

you just don't understand it. he used to be literally obsessed with you, but now you're fighting for just five minutes of his attention.

he's almost always out of the house, and when he is at home, he's got that walkie talkie glued to his side, ready to take off the moment there's a crackle of static asking for his help.

it's a nightmare. you know his friends need him, but you need him too, and the more he runs after them, you wonder if it's just something to do with you.

you want his attention back; you want him to love you again.

it's like your devoted boyfriend, steve harrington, went to work one day and disappeared, only to be replaced by something that looks like him, moves and talks like him, but isn't him.

you tried everything you could think of; any kind of excuse for him to spend more than ten minutes with you for something that wasn't just going to sleep in the same bed.

you planned dates, but those plans always fell through when he'd get stuck "working late". you tried to get him to watch a movie with you on the couch, but he'd fall asleep halfway in, or he'd not have enough time because "dustin needed him for something".

you tried to tempt him, because you were getting desperate. you dressed in one of his shirts, no bra beneath it like he always loved, and a pair of lacy panties, just waiting for him to get home. ten months ago, he'd have told you he "couldn't resist you looking like this" and he'd have gone all in.

but when he got home, he hardly glanced your way as he took off his shirt and changed into pajama pants, slipping into bed beside you and keeping his back facing your way.

"stevie..." you'd whispered softly, leaning in closer so your chin was pressed to his shoulder and your voice right beside his ear. he hummed in response as you slowly kissed the warm skin of his bicep. "steve."

"not tonight, honey." he mumbled, burying his face into his pillow. "'m sorry. i'm just tired."

you frowned, your lips still glued to his skin, but listened. you respected his space. without as much as a sigh, you'd rolled over and curled into yourself, unsure of what you were supposed to do, because steve didn't want you anymore.

and that leads you to now. november 4th, 1987.

steve hadn't come home the night before, only arriving now, in the early afternoon of the next day, just to shower and change his clothes before he disappears again. and you've had enough.

you watch the way he brushes past you, pulling a jacket on over his sweater — your favorite sweater of his — and grabbing his keys.

"steve." you call out his name as he reaches for the doorhandle, and you're almost surprised to see him stop and turn to face you.

"yeah, honey?" his tone was sweet, almost familiar, but you could hear the tiredness behind it, like there was something forcing the tone out of him.

"don't 'yeah, honey' me, steven." you stated, and his face immediately scrunched into an expression that was a mixture of confusion, concern and surprise. "where the hell are you going?"

"work." he states, and you scoff, crossing your arms and giving him a look that tells him loud and clear that you don't believe him.

"you just got home from work." you point out, and he sighs, running a hand through his hair. "steve, just talk to me. please. tell me what's going on."

he sighs and shifts on his feet, pulling the front door open. "i can't do this right now, i gotta go."

he takes one step out the doorway, and you draw in a sharp breath.

"if you leave right now, i won't be here when you get back." the words leave your mouth before you even had the chance to think them over, because, frankly, you're just done. "i'm so sick of this, steve. you don't talk to me, you don't touch me, you hardly even look at me anymore, and it's bullshit."

the last word slices through the air like a blade, and steve freezes in his tracks, his blood running cold as he turns to face you again. bullshit.

"honey, please—” his voice comes out shakier than it was before. "can we... we can talk about this tonight. i promise. it's just, i have to go. please don't leave."

you don’t meet his eyes, you just cross your arms and look down at the floor, but you do give him a hesitant nod, because you don’t want to lose him.

steve looks hurt as he closes the front door, and you watch from the window as he trudges to his beamer in the driveway.

you almost wanted to leave, but then something in his tone, the desperation, makes you stay. you feel hopeful. once he gets home tonight, you'll be able to talk and work everything out.

except steve doesn't come home that night. or at all the next day. it's the night of november 6th when he returns, or the early morning of november 7th technically, and you're ready to fight with him, because he promised you would talk, then disappeared again, leaving you worried sick even when you don't want to be.

you sit in the living room, arms crossed while your leg bounces up and down with anxiety. you're not sure if he's going to come home tonight, but you're praying he does, because no matter how angry you are with him, you still love steve harrington more than anything.

then, when you were passed out on the couch, sometime between 4 and 5 a.m., the sky still dark outside, you wake up to the sound of his keys scratching against the door.

you stand up quickly and hurry across the room, pulling the door open without a moment's hesitation, and your breath catches in your throat.

he's a mess, both physically and emotionally, but he's steve, and he's standing right in front of you.

there's a fresh cut on one of his cheekbones, with a few more cuts and bruises covering his face, and you feel a sudden rush of deja vu. this was almost the same thing that had happened 18 months ago, and it makes your stomach sink.

he's dressed in full tactical gear; a brown leather jacket, a backwards cap covering his usually perfectly styled hair, camo print shirt, cargo pants and a red bandana around his neck. all of it is coated in a thick layer of some foul-smelling slime, but you still step back to let him inside the house.

he doesn't walk past you this time, instead of heading upstairs to the shower without another word, he collapses into your arms with a shaky sob, his hands gripping onto you tighter than in months as his fists gripped into the fabric of your sweater and his face slipped into the crook of your neck.

you hug him back, a little confused, and overwhelmed by both the sight before you and the stench that comes with it, but you still hold him.

"i'm sorry." he whimpers into your neck, and it all hits you at once.

you had never once seen steve cry, especially not like this, and now he was breaking down in your arms, crying into your shoulder and holding onto your body like an anchor.

"steve," you whisper out his name and his arms circle you tighter, almost like he's trying to melt into your body. "where on earth have you been? i've— i've been so worried."

he just cried harder, the two of you still standing in the doorway.

"i'm so sorry, honey. i love you so much." his voice comes out shakily, and you pull away from the hug to meet his eyes, cupping his slimy, tear-stained cheek with one hand.

"come on." you tell him, not responding to anything else he's said and just taking his hand to lead him upstairs to the bathroom.

you start running him a hot bath without another word, only glancing his way to tell him to take off his slime-covered war outfit and get in the tub.

"you gonna join me?" he asks shakily, like it’s a poor attempt at a joke, but there’s hope in his tone. you draw in a sharp breath before speaking tearfully.

"only if you promise to tell me what the hell is going on with you right now. because, steve, i swear to god—”

"i'll tell you everything."

and he does. finally.

with his back pressed against your chest, his body slotted between your legs, in the bath, he tells you everything.

years of trauma, from fighting monsters in joyce byers’s living room, to being tortured by russians, from being choked and eaten by killer bats, to coming up with the final plan to take down who he referred to as “vecna”.

and you listen to it all, and though it’s a little confusing, it makes sense. it fills in so many gaps and questions in your mind.

the scars steve could never explain came from monsters, his late nights at work were because of what he called “crawls”.

he tells you about the upside down, about el, about everything he never could before, and you listen, from the beginning all the way to the end, when he explains that it’s over, that they just destroyed the upside down, that el sacrificed herself, and that he and the rest of his friends were safe.

when he finishes talking, you don’t say anything. you stay quiet, taking it all in, thinking it all over, solving all the little things steve had said in the past that had left you confused, the times he had almost let a secret slip out.

it’s hard not to believe him when you’ve seen the wounds first hand, when the timelines add up perfectly, when he shows up covered head-to-toe in mysterious slime that really can’t be explained in any other way.

“honey?” his voice broke the silence, because had noticed the way you fell quiet. “you okay back there?”

“yeah. just— just thinking.” you whisper, and steve sits up straighter, no longer leaning against you, and he turns to face you, reaching for your hand.

“what are you thinking about?” he asks you. he laces your fingers together like he always used to.

“the fact that you’ve apparently been fighting monsters for the last four years of your life and you just didn’t think of mentioning it to me?” you said, looking up to see steve’s frown. “steve, i was so scared. you were disappearing, you hardly talked to me anymore i thought— i thought you were going to break up with me, or that you were cheating, or that you just… didn’t love me anymore.”

steve’s face softens, guilt immediately eating away at his features, brows knitted together as he attempted to slide closer to you in the tub. “oh, baby, no, no, no.”

his arms come around you, pulling you towards him as he peppers kisses all over your forehead and face. you finally let the lump in your throat go, tears flowing from your eyes as you sob into the bare skin of his shoulder.

steve cradles you, holding you so gently and refusing to let go.

“i’m sorry. i’m so sorry, honey.” he whispers into your hairline, letting his own tears slip free again. “i should’ve— i never wanted you to feel like this, i just wanted to keep you safe. god, i didn’t even notice i was hurting you, baby, i’m sorry.”

“i thought you didn’t want me anymore.” you whimper against his skin, lip quivering and voice shaky no matter how hard you try to stop it. “i really thought you didn’t love me.”

“no, honey, never. i’ll always love you.” he reassures you, arms tightening around your body. “i’ll always want you, ‘cause you’re it for me, okay? i don’t want anyone else but you.”

you draw in another shaky breath, but nod as your breathing begins to balance out again and you collect yourself.

“i love you.” he states, letting his hands loosen from where they were wrapped around you to pull back jist slightly, allowing him to meet your gaze, your eyes red and raw from the tears.

“i love you, too.” you reply, and steve smiles, leaning in to kiss you and you let his lips meet yours.

it’s soft, gentle, and somehow the first real kiss you’ve had in months. steve’s hand comes up to cup your cheek as he kisses you deeper, eyes closed before he pulls back and presses his forehead against yours.

“i’ve missed you, you know? i didn’t mean to push you away.” he mumbles and you nod. there’s a silent pause before you giggle quietly, and steve stares fondly, a little puzzled. “what?”

“just— i think we need to wash your hair.” you say. “you reek, steve.”

“thank you.” he mutters sarcastically, but his lips curve upwards. “you always know how to flatter me, honey.”

you just smile and hum in response, because even if the hurt is still at the surface, it’s slowly fading away, replacing itself with relief just because you have him back.

“okay.” steve says, reaching for his shampoo and pulling it closer. “how about we make a deal? you take care of me and help me wash all of this goopy shit from my hair, and i promise to take the best care of you the moment we get out.”

“hmm.” you let your eyes narrow and tap your chin as if you’re deep in thought. “how would you take care of me?”

“i’ll do anything you want, honey.” steve promises, lips traveling down your neck as he leaves wet kisses that make you giggle. “you want to stay in bed and cuddle for the next week? done. you want me to cook you dinner and watch a movie? on it. you want me to eat you out for the rest of the night? i’m on my knees already, baby. i’ll do anything to make it up to you.”

your hands drift around his neck, nails gently scratching against the bottom of his hair as you him him close and rest your chin on his head, his laugh sending vibrations up your neck.

“okay.” you finally say and he sits up to meet your eyes again.

“yeah?” he asks and you nod.

“yeah.” you confirm, tears sparkling in the corners of your eyes. you brush some of his wet hair away from his eyes. “and, for the record, all you have to do to make it up to me is be here. just be here with me.”

he nods, thumb stroking your cheek. “i can do that.”

you smile. he smiles back, then pulls you close again, into another hug, like he doesn’t want to let you go.

steve would gladly hold you in his arms for the rest of his life and he’d never get bored. not when he has you. and he’ll very gladly spend the rest of his life proving that to you.

that’s why he’s had a ring hidden in his underwear drawer for the last year, just waiting for the perfect moment.

now that he knows that hawkins, and the entire world, is safe from monsters and the upside down, he has a feeling that perfect moment’s going to come up sometime soon, and he can’t wait.

—

He lets out an oof at the pillow you throw at him. “He’s not pathetic!” You defend. “He’s kind, he’s always giving me rides even though I know my car takes way less gas than his van and he won’t let me pay him back. He visits me at the diner to keep me company on my breaks, he always lets me picks the movie when we have movie nights even though I know he can’t stand to watch The Breakfast Club again but he sits through it because he knows I love it.”

You unconsciously end your rant with a little sigh, a cheesy smile on your face. There’s a beat of silence and you look at your two friends who stare at you with matching, knowing expressions.

“You might have a point.” You reply with pursed lips.

And thus the decision was made. You were going to bite the bullet and ask out Eddie Munson, because there was absolutely no way he was going to say no.

It was a few days before you got the chance to ask. During your weekly movie night where the two of you were watching (you guessed it) The Breakfast Club, you approached the subject with caution, still jittery with nerves despite your friends insistence that Eddie was into you.

The credits were rolling, soda cups empty and popcorn bowl down to the last few kernels. You watched Eddie sit up and stretch his arms, your voice coming out quieter than you meant for it to. “Hey, Eds?”

“Yeah?” He replies through a yawn. You took a second to admire his messy head of curls and the heaviness of his eyelids that told you he’d be crashing soon.

“I was just wondering-“ You swallowed, wiping your suddenly sweaty palms onto your pants. “Would you, maybe, wanna go see a movie? This week?”

Eddie suddenly looked more awake than he was ten seconds ago, big brown eyes open wide as he processes what you’ve asked. “The movies?”

You nod, a shy smile on your lips. “Yeah, I was thinking that new movie Labyrinth? The one with David Bowie I think you’d like!”

Eddie melts inside, because the first time you mentioned to movie to him you said he would like it, and he watched the previews to find out that you were right, because you knew him that well.

He nods dumbly. “I recall.” His arm reaches up to scratch the back of his neck. “I think i’d be down. We can do Friday?”

Your heart leaps in your chest, unable to keep the grin from blooming on your face. “Friday is good! Friday’s great actually! Pick me up at seven?”

There’s a surge of adrenaline coursing through you as you realize that you finally did it. You asked our Eddie Munson, your best friend who you have feelings for, and he said yes!

Before he can even answer your question, you look up at the clock hung above the door of the trailer, realizing how late it was. “Oh shit, I should’ve been home like an hour ago. I have work early tomorrow!” You curse, scrambling to collect all of your stuff.

“Are you sure you don’t wanna stay? It’s late for you to be driving?” Eddie asks, a little concern seeping through his tone.

You shake your head, slipping your shoes back on. “No can do, the emergency work uniform in my car has had one too many spills and smells like grease.” You tell him with a scrunched nose.

Eddie chuckles, following you to the door. “Okay, well, be careful. The roads are probably still wet from the rain earlier.”

Your stomach flutters at his care for you. “I will, Eds. I’ll see you Friday?” You grin at him once more, taking the leap and jumping to press a kiss to his cheek.

You’re already halfway in your car, waving goodbye to him and don’t see the rush of color that floods his cheeks. You also don’t see him hold his hand where your lips had touched as you drive out of the trailer park.

The memory of the sweet kiss you left on his cheek burned for the rest of the night. The dopey smile on Eddie’s face stayed in put until he was in bed, replaying the night in his head, just as he did every time the two of you hung out.

Only this time Eddie has an epiphany, shooting up in his bed, eyes blown wide. “Was she asking me on a date?”

-

Eddie spends the next few days reeling after the realization that your invitation for the movies had been you asking him on a date.

In hindsight, it also explains the cheek kiss that damn near brought him to his knees.

He can’t even let himself be excited, instead his mind is choosing to turn on him. He should be on cloud nine, ecstatic that the girl of his dreams wants to go on a date with him.

No, his years of abandonment issues choose right now to pull him down.

Why would she ever want to go out with you? You can barely afford to feed yourself, how do you expect to pay for all of your dates? You have a twin mattress in a trailer, a room you can’t keep clean and a van that break down more often than it drives. What about you screams boyfriend material?

She’s just confused, mistaking your kindness for something with longevity. She deserves better than a loser who can’t even finish high school on time.

The thoughts keep him tossing and turning until he’s gone days without a good nights sleep. He gets lucky that you’re swamped at the diner and have no time to see him. The couple of instances that you ask to see him, he makes up an excuse about too much homework, or doing something for Wayne.

And you, of course, don’t get upset at him. You tell him it’s okay, in your sweet voice, and bring up how excited you are for Friday. It only makes him feel worse.

He starts to believe his brain is right. You deserve better than he could ever provide for you.

So the morning of your date, Eddie decides to make a phone call.

-

You were walking on air the days leading up to your date with Eddie.

You were a little bummed you couldn’t see him before then, but you’d both had a busy week and you just couldn’t wait for tonight.

“Got a hot date or something?” Rhonda, your fellow waitress and the sweetest woman alive, asks. “You’ve been floating around here for days now. You didn’t even get upset when the four top last night left without leaving a tip.”

Heat flooded your face, a shy smile appearing without your control. “Or something…” You trail off, placing all of the dirty dishes on your serving tray into the sink.

Rhonda cocks an eyebrow at you, smirking knowingly. “I hope this something is happening with that scruffy boy that’s always in here for you.”

“It might be.” You shrug coyly. “It’s just a movie date.”

“We all know what happens on movie dates.” Rhonda teases, bumping your hip as she moves past you into the kitchen.

You sputter at her retreating figure, flustered at the idea that anything intimate might happen between you and Eddie tonight. Your mind starts to spiral and you work the rest of your shift on autopilot, too busy trying to shake the images of Eddie in more promiscuous positions.

-

Your heart refuses to steady as you sit in your living room. You’ve smoothed out the fabric of your dress a million times, and your lips sting a little from how much your teeth have pick at the skin. The layer of wax typically on your lips, your usual lipstick, is significantly missing from your makeup.

You left the tube untouched on your vanity, silently hoping that maybe the night would end with a kiss. A kiss that would be better without lipstick smeared on both of your chins after.

It’s a few minutes before seven, but you’d been sitting tensely for the last twenty minutes, the anticipation for the night influencing you to get ready extra early.

A mistake you’re learning, because it leaves you stewing in your anxiety while you wait for Eddie to pick you up.

After what felt like forever, a flash of headlights spills through the front windows. You shoot up from your seat, now stuck standing in the middle of your living room.

A few seconds later a knock sounds on your door and you almost lunge to open it before you realize that you don’t want Eddie thinking you were waiting at the door. Even if that’s exactly what you were doing.

You wait a beat, take a breath, then reach for the door with shaking hands.

The door opens and Eddie stands there, clad in one of his many band t-shirts, his leather jacket and dark jeans. It isn’t anything different from his everyday wear, yet the sight of him is enough to release a wave of butterflies in your stomach.

Similarly, Eddie freezes when the door reveals you. You, in your pretty dress, standing there with the kitchen lights behind you making you glow like an angel. It actually knocks the breath out of him.

He glances to your mouth, noting the absence of your signature color. He has no time to dwell on that detail.

“Hi.” You say, hoping you don’t sound as nervous as you are. Even though you have no reason to be. This is your best friend Eddie. You have movie nights all the time, you’ve stayed over at his trailer a dozen times, why does this feel any different?

“Hi.” He chokes out. “You look beautiful. I mean-“ His eyes go wide. “You always look beautiful, just right now-it’s like…extra?”

You bite your lip to keep from laughing, “Thank you, Ed’s.” You chuckle despite your efforts. “Ready to go?”

To keep his dignity, Eddie refrains from trying to speak again, instead waving his arms towards his awaiting van.

You think him quietly when he opens the passenger door for you, something he does all the time, yet the action makes you smile.

“Excited for the movie?” You ask as the van exits your neighborhood. It breaks the silence that had fallen over you.

Eddie hums in confirmation, “Yeah I think it’s gonna be good.” But says nothing else. You frown, finding it weird that he’s so quiet. Eddie usually can’t go five minutes without going on a tangent, it’s one of the things you love about him.

Maybe he’s just nervous, you tell yourself.

Little else is said in the few minutes it takes to get to the Hawkins Theater. A couple mumbles of how your respective days were is the extent.

By the time you’re parking, the butterflies in your stomach had been replaced by an odd feeling, one that you couldn’t name because you didn’t know what was making Eddie act so weird.

Was he already regretting the date? It had barely even started.

Still, he slips out of the car and jogs to your side to open the door for you, a gentlemen despite his out of character behavior.

Already the night isn’t going like how you envisioned. You thought by now your usual banter with Eddie would have put you both at ease, maybe even holding hands on your way in.

Eddie, though, seems to not want to get any closer to you than a couple feet. His hands stay buried the in pockets of his jacket and he hasn’t said a word in the last few minutes.

You both reach the ticket booth. “How can I help y’all?” The woman behind the counter chirps.

“Uh, yeah, two tickets for Labyrinth. Please.” Eddie replies, pulling his wallet out.

The woman beams. “Great choice!” She slips two tickets through the plastic slot. “Two tickets for the happy couple. Y’all enjoy!”

You flush at the title, but when you look over at Eddie he’s frowning, mumbling a thanks as he grabs them.

He doesn’t wait for you to say anything, already heading towards the door. You send a friendly smile to the employee before jogging to catch up with him.

He seems to be in a hurry to get inside the theater, his long strides making it hard to keep up. “Eds-“ You huff. “Eddie, wait up!”

Your pleas fall on deaf ears, but you do eventually make it to the theater where he wordlessly holds the door behind him.

You let out a breath, following him into the dimly lit room. You’re walking behind him up the stairs, so close to his back that his shoulders block your view of the seats.

Everything seems normal, until an all too familiar voice calls your names.

“Hey! There you guys are!” It’s none other than Dustin Henderson, flanked on either side by Lucas and Mike, Max, El, and Will next to them. In the row above them are Steve, Robin, Nancy and Jonathan.

The entire gang is taking up a good chunk of the seats, and you have a sinking feeling them being at the exact same showing as you and Eddie isn’t a coincidence.

“The movie’s gonna start soon! We bought some popcorn for you!” The teenager grins, holding up an untouched bucket of popcorn.

You force out a laugh. “Yeah, I-I didn’t know you’d all be here.” You cross your arms, eyes bouncing from one friend to another.

“Oh Eddie didn’t tell you? He called this morning, said you wanted all of us to come see the movie. Guess the diner was really busy this week?” The innocence in Dustin’s tone is what really has your heart sinking.

Your friends aren’t here by accident you realize. Eddie invited them. He invited your entire friend group to what was supposed to be a date.

A wave of humiliation washes over you as you finally put two and two together. Eddie was acting weird because he clearly didn’t want this to be a date. And what makes it so much worse is Steve and Robin, the only people who knew of your plan to ask out Eddie, seem to also realize what’s happening, their stares morphing from confused to pitiful.

You glance at Eddie and his eyes are everywhere but you, landing the final blow to your heart.

You look back at Dustin, swallowing the lump in your throat. “Yeah, it was busy.” You don’t wait for Eddie to sit, shouldering past him instead to claim the seat next to Robin.

He takes the seat next to you but you don’t dare look at him.

Robin and Steve both turn their heads towards you, the blonde leaning closer to mumble to you. “Are you okay?” They both look at you with concern clear on their faces.

You can’t look at them, fearing the eye contact may break you entirely. “Ask me tomorrow.” You say, blinking away the tears that stung in your eyes.

｡･:*:･ﾟ★,｡･:*:･ﾟ☆ *:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ

read part two here <3

Eddie was completely obsessed with you. And who could blame him, you were always parading around in your little cheerleader outfit and the bow at the top of your ponytail, it was driving him insane.

It all started after summer, when Dustin started high school and entered hellfire. Your paths had never really crossed before but ever since you came into the room where he held the campaign, already yelling at your brother for making you wait, he could not stop thinking about you.

After months of just watching you in the hallways and teasing when you stopped by to get Dustin, he asked you to come watch his band play.

"I'll think about it, Munson." you teased, getting in your car and driving out, leaving him standing in the middle of the parking lot.

The next day, when you purposely dropped by to talk to your brother, he demanded an answer.

“I’m still thinking about it, okay?"

And again the next day, and the day after that and the rest of the week, and still no answer. Until it was the day of the special concert and he drove to your place to pick you up.

It took him a few seconds to knock on the door, nerves running through his body like never before. He heard two voices coming from inside, yours yelling for Dustin to get the door and Dustin’s yelling right back at you.

Eddie’s smile faded when Dustin opened the door. “Go get your sister, Henderson.”

“Dude, I told you to stop hitting on my sister, she’s not into you” He told Eddie, rolling his eyes.

“If she wasn’t into me we wouldn’t have a date tonight, but we do. So can you go get her?”

“Who is it?” you asked, making your way to the front door and quickly regretting it. You were standing in front of Eddie in an old tshirt that was basically see through and a pair of old shorts that didn’t fit your brother anymore. “Dustin, go to your room”

“What? You’re not my mom, I’m not ten” he squealed.

“I don’t care, go to your room!” You told him again and watched him leave before turning back to Eddie. You caught his gaze quickly shift from your chest back to your face and were suddenly very aware of your braless state. “What the hell are you doing here?”

“We have a date. Why aren’t you ready?”

“Well, Edward, it’s” you grabbed his wrist and turned to you, checking the time on his watch, “nine fifteen on a saturday, I planned on staying in and watching a movie with my brother”

“That nerd? Pretty sure a metal concert is more fun” he teased.

“I don’t like metal, Eddie”

“You don’t have to like metal, just have to like me” You just rolled your eyes at his words, but he was determined to get you to come. "C'mon, it's Saturday and I have weed. We can hang out and smoke something after the show."

“Fine! I’ll get dressed.” You gave in but closed the front door, making him wait outside.

You changed into a short leather skirt and a dark sweater, lace tights and high boots protecting you from the cold fall breeze. You stopped by Dustin’s room when walking back, opening the door without even knocking.

“I’m going out”

“What? You’re leaving me alone?” he squealed again, throwing the comic he was reading into the air. “What time do you come back? What do I tell mom when she gets home?”

“We already had dinner and there are snacks in the kitchen, you’ll be fine alone. I don’t know what time I’ll be back. And, you know damn well mom won’t check, she won’t even know, I’ll get in through the window. Good?”

“You’re a terrible sister,” he said.

“Love you too, Dusty!” you told him, already making your way to the front door.

The drive to the bar was silent but not too bad, you were touching up your make up on the sunvisor, smudging liner on your eyes.

“This okay?” You turned to him as he parked, “don’t wanna stand out too much”

“It’s perfect. You look great.”

You would never admit it, but that compliment made you blush.

There were about ten people at the bar, you and the workers included, but Eddie didn’t seem to mind, he had to start somewhere.

You had to admit that he looked great on stage. After an energetic thirty minute set he was sweating, hair all over the place and a wide smile on his face.

After the set he took you to his van, you knew exactly why.

You sat on the carpet side by side and he pulled a blunt out of his pocket, placing it between your lips to light it. After a couple passes the van was foggy and your minds were hazy.

In your cloudy mind you barely realized how close Eddie had gotten until his hand was on your cheeks, turning your face to his so he could blow smoke into your mouth. He held your face, watching as you took the smoke into your lungs.

His dark reddened eyes stared into yours for a beat before his lips met yours again, but this time in a kiss. It was messy but none of you cared, you just moaned when he pushed his tongue into your mouth.

Soon his left hand met your waist, holding it tight and guiding you onto his lap. He put out the blunt so he could let his hands roam under your sweater. His hands were warm, rough, but the metal of his rings and chain were still cold.

You could feel him hardening under you, barely pressing to your middle, just enough to get your entire body hot. You were out of your mind enough to grind your hips against his; once, twice.

It was only when his hands moved to unclasp your bra that you stopped in your tracks. “Eddie” you called, “Eddie, no.”

“Doll” He groaned in complaint.

“No, Eddie… we’re high.” You slid off his lap, tidying up your skirt.

"Sorry, I didn’t mean to go too far”

“No, it’s okay. I just…” you trailed off, “just don’t wanna lose my virginity in the back of a van, especially when we’re both high”

Eddie raised his brows, “so cheerleaders are actually good girls, huh?”

“I wouldn’t say that smoking weed in the back of an older guy’s van is very ‘good girl’ of me”

“You know what I meant.” He leaned in for a kiss but you pulled away.

“I think we should go home” you told him, voice weak.

"Yeah, right" he backed up, climbing onto the front seat and helping you to do the same.

"Are you avoiding me?" he asked, stopping you from going into your classroom.

"Eddie" you groaned trying again to go through the door but his tall frame stopped you.

"C'mon, sweetheart, you're more mature than this. Talk to me, please"

"What do you wanna hear, Munson?" you gave in, trying to hide a smile as he took the heavy books from your arms.

"Well, from you, a lot of things but I don't think that's appropriated" You gave him a single look that ended his teasing. "Sorry. But I did really miss seeing you this week, making up excuses to come into Hellfire in your little cheer outfit”

“I go in there to pick up Dustin, you go over time a lot” you explained. You would never parade your cheer clothes for Eddie.

“Right. I’m serious though, I just wanna know why you’re avoiding me”

“Well, Edward, we almost fucked in the back of your van, that’s not exactly the kind of girl I wanna be” you snapped, whispering so the few people running late to class didn’t hear you.

“You’re not that kind of girl! I know that. Just go out with me again and I’ll show you what you really deserve, I promise.” His eyes were searching yours but you didn’t want to look up, so his hand reached for your chin, “just say you’ll think about it, okay?”

“Okay, I’ll think about it.” You sighed as his thumb brushed your bottom lip. His eyes were full of lust as he looked down at you, holding everything back. “I’ll uh… I’ll meet you after Hellfire. I’m pretty sure Dustin is going to Mike’s after school”

You thought about leaving practice early multiple times, Hellfire usually ended at five and it was already 45 minutes past that when you finished. They wouldn’t even have noticed it, you were barely doing anything.

But you stayed to the end, hoping that Eddie would still be waiting for you. You ran out of the gymnasium, down the corridor, to one of the last rooms, the one with a sign that said ‘Hellfire’.

You peeked through the door and saw him on his throne, writing something down. You couldn’t help but smile at how concentrated he looked.

“Hi” you spoke, voice small and soft, different from how it usually sounds when you get there to drag Dustin out of the session.

“Look who decided to show”. He looked up from the desk, relaxing back on the chair, legs spread and arms on the rests.

“Practice takes longer than playing pretend”

“Wow,” he takes a hand to his chest, “I’m gonna pretend that offended me. For your ego”

You rolled your eyes at his theatrics, making your way to him slowly. You placed yourself between him and the table, pushing back all his notes and the little figurines.

“You told me to meet you here” he said after a beat.

“I did”

“Why?”

There was no point in hiding the truth, “I– I wanted to kiss you again.”

Eddie didn’t say anything, but his brows lifted, teasing you with no words. You kicked his foot in response, but he only smiled and tapped his lap. You couldn’t help but take the seat.

He guided you to straddle him, knees on each side of his thighs, digging into the chair. Then his hand moved up to your face, palm on your jaw, fingers reaching behind your neck to pull you down.

Your lips met in a slow tentative kiss, your hands rested on his chest. You kissed deeper, hungrier, crashing your lips against his, until he pulled away, smiling.

“Really waited all week, huh?” he teased, brushing your bangs off your face.

“You’re ridiculous, Edward.” You slapped a hand on his chest, with barely any force.

He placed his hand over yours, holding it there, “I waited all week, too”

Then his lips were on yours again. His left hand was now on the back of your neck, pulling you impossibly closer. You sighed when his tongue pressed to your lips, making them part and welcome it in.

The hand on his chest moved to your hip, holding it flush to his; you could feel his belt through the thin shorts under your skirt. By the time you were out of breath, his lips moved down your neck, slipping your ponytail to the other side. Your hands moved to his hair, diving into the messy curls as he attacked your neck.

“Eddie,” you called. “Eddie, no marks, please.”

He just grinned at you and took his lips back to yours, the hand in your hips guiding them to grind against his. You gasped into Eddie’s mouth when you felt his cock through the jeans.

“Shit. I’m sorry” he apologized immediately, remembering the last time you were together.

You shook your head. “It’s fine. It feels good, actually, but… we’re at school, I think– I think… maybe we just shouldn’t be doing this here.”

“You’re right,” he sighed, but guided your lips to his again.

You melted into the kiss, letting him take you completely until you heard a noise outside. You both jumped, quickly pulling apart and looking at the door.

“Okay, maybe we should go” he whispered against your lips before you burst into giggles.

You walked to the parking lot together, he waited for you to get into your car, leaned against the door to speak.

“I’ll call, okay? So we can talk about that date”

You nodded, but suddenly decided that your idea was much better than his. “Why don’t you, uh, show up at my house later?”

“Show up? What, like at your door?”

“No, at my window, Eddie. After dinner, maybe nine?” you suggested.

“You’re asking me to climb through your window?” he scoffed.

“You’ve seen me do it, it’s pretty easy. You can come in and, you know… Only if you want, of course.”

His hand reached out for your face guiding it towards him. “I’ll show up to your window, doll, don’t worry.” He placed a gentle kiss on your lips, “nine, yeah? Get home safe.”

You just nodded and watched Eddie pull away from your car. You rolled the window back up, turned on the radio and let out a big sigh before driving away.

Your routine was a little more intense than normal that night — you took a long bath, lotioned and powdered your entire body, put on just a bit of lipgloss even after brushing your teeth, but, most importantly, picked out the cutest pajamas you had; nothing sexy, just better than the last ones he saw you in.

Then you sat, and waited.

Time seemed to be dragging itself out, you could swear the clock on your nightstand was broken. 08:21, 08:37, 08:46, 08:55, finally! You waited the last five minutes looking around your room, checking if anything was out of place.

You jumped when he knocked on the window, checking yourself in the mirror one last time. You couldn't help but smile as you opened the curtains and the window for him.

“That’s the first time I’ve seen you be on time for something.”

“Well, I couldn’t keep my princess waiting.” Eddie winked and you pulled away from the window, letting him climb in. He stood up and looked around, drawing in the pink walls and flower patterns. “Jesus, your room is exactly what I thought it would be”

“What is that supposed to mean, Eddie?”

“Oh, it’s cute, don’t get me wrong. I love the totally not creepy and hunted dolls”

You slapped his chest, “don’t say that about my dolls, they’re too pretty to be kept away”

“I can think of something way prettier in this room” he whispered, wrapping an arm around your waist to pull you closer.

You blushed and hid your face in his chest, “that’s ridiculous.”

“I just think you’re the prettiest doll in here” he teased on purpose, wanting to see you even more frustrated.

He grabbed your cheeks with one hand, making you look up at him. His thumb brushed your lips as he pulled you closer, your lips met in a gentle kiss.

Eddie turned, moving backwards to sit on the bed, pulling you down on his lap. You smiled against his lips, pulling away and sitting up on his lap.

“You look silly in my room”

“Silly? Are the chains and the leather clashing with your flowers and teddies?” he teased, grabbing one of your stuffed animals and throwing it far away.

“Eddie! That was Cheer Bear!”

“I don’t think Cheer Bear should see what’s happening here,” he looked at the bed again, spotting two more teddies, “neither should these guys”

This time he carefully put them on the floor, making more space on the bed. His hands creeped up your thighs, going under your short nightgown and pressing you down on his lap. You leaned in, kissing him again, your hands resting on his stomach.

Soon his tongue moved into your mouth, one of his hands moving to hold the back of your neck. You sighed at the feeling of his big hand guiding you around, relaxing further onto his body.

The hand guided your face up, making space for Eddie to move on to your neck. His lips brushed down your jaw, to the side of your neck. He covered your skin in gentle kisses, making you shiver.

“Gonna let me touch you this time, sweetheart?” he whispered against your neck.

You nodded, almost desperately as his hands made their way under your nightgown again. “Please”

His fingers went lower, pressing against your cunt, feeling the wetness through the fabric of your panties. You gasped and Eddie sighed at the feeling.

“Fuck. Were you this wet when we made out earlier? Did you ruin those panties too?”

You felt your face flush at his words and hid in his neck. “You’re gross, Eddie”

“Not gross, doll. Nothing’s gross about this, this is exactly what I want.” He kissed your neck again, slowly, getting you to sit back up. “Let me make you feel good, yeah?”

You nodded. His other hand guided your hips to bring against his fingers, making you squirm on his lap.

Eddie grinned at your reaction to such a simple action. His lips met your neck again as his fingers dipped into your underwear, finally meeting your wet folds. You dropped your head to his shoulder, the scent of old leather and smoke surrounding you.

His fingers danced around your folds, opening you up as your hips involuntarily grinded down. Eddie held you close, keeping you stable as his fingers moved lower, pressing against your hole.

You sighed, trying to relax as his fingers made their way inside you. You could feel the cold chain around his wrist pressing against your lower stomach as his fingers started moving inside you.

They curled and pressed, slowly building up a rhythm that had you shoving your face in his neck to stop any noises. But when his thumb reached out for your clit you couldn’t help but let out a loud gasp.

Eddie grinned and pressed his mouth to your ear, “shhh, sweetheart. You don’t want anyone to hear, do you?”

“Eddie” you whined. You wanted to tell him you had never felt that good before but you didn’t trust your voice anymore.

His fingers kept working you, steadier as he read every single one of your reactions. He felt you tensing on his lap, thighs pressing against his, hands gripping his shoulders tighter.

“Let it go, doll. Don’t hold back, just relax”

You weren’t exactly sure what you had to let go, but you tried your best to follow his instructions and relax. Soon you were feeling pumps of pleasure all over your body, clenching around him as your hands dived into his hair, tugging at the strands.

“Eddie, I…” you swallowed hard, “what?”

He chuckled, kissing your neck as you came down. “You just got there, doll”

You just let out a sigh and chuckled against his shoulder. “Wow” you whispered, in the sweetest voice Eddie had ever heard.

“Yeah,” he smiled, “wow. Nice?”

“Very nice” you told him, unable to wipe the smile from your face.

“Tired?” he whispered and you nodded. He looked around, spotting a glass of water on the nightstand. “Here, drink some water.”

As soon as you sat up to drink you felt the pressure of his cock under you, the move making him let out a low groan.

“Oh!” you gasped, anxiety probably all over your face.