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@ca1e70-deactivated
SOMEONE appreciates me

Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
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hi im not actually dead, im just deleting my original tumblr in favor of a new one. so. this shit is getting remade at the same url @ca1e70 because my Brand.
firefly/serenity au where dave takes over for river and rose takes over for simon and whenever dave gets on his insane babble bullshit everyone's like "oh is that the academy" and rose is like hm. no he's always been like this. now he just has an excuse
john takes over for wash. karkat takes over for mal.
john: yeah, well, if she doesn't give us some extra flow from the engine room to offset the burn-through this landing is gonna get pretty interesting.
karkat: define interesting
john: oh god, oh god, we're all going to die?
firefly/serenity au where dave takes over for river and rose takes over for simon and whenever dave gets on his insane babble bullshit everyone's like "oh is that the academy" and rose is like hm. no he's always been like this. now he just has an excuse

Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
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not even mad that tumblr glitched and i spammed by accident tbh it just dug in my point further . apologies to the fucking tl. i have to be at work in 20 but i've spent my morning debating dave's mommy kink . hows everyone doing today
there was no debating you blatantly agreed with me
okay dave kinnie
not even mad that tumblr glitched and i spammed by accident tbh it just dug in my point further . apologies to the fucking tl. i have to be at work in 20 but i've spent my morning debating dave's mommy kink . hows everyone doing today
there was no debating you blatantly agreed with me
get urself a girl that accidentally adds six reblogs to the same post
@betahell shows up like hi i don’t know what happened to my computer can y'all please fix it?? and then after like two fucking minutes of their absolute tech god genius fingers stroking those keys some hyper realistic fan art of dave calling rose mommy while she fucks him with her eldritch edgar allen poe magic tentacles she birthed out of thin air pops up and the poor 27 year old man who lives with his WASP mother and dodgers fan father in a converted garage bedroom presses the secret panic button below the counter and homeland security personally escorts you to alcatraz for your inadvertent attempt at terrorism
our friend hell is pulling out their wallet like “how much do i owe you” and the swat team is already descending stripper style from their helicopters, a sniper is trained on their heat signature from the home depot across the street. they’ll never see their family ever again. that essay they have due on mesopotamian agriculture and farming techniques? never turned in. not that it even fucking matters, it’s not like they have remedial courses in alcatraz. your cell mate is going to ask you what you did to land yourself in the inescapable prison right off the golden gate bridge. you say you were behind one of the most influential daverose blogs of all time. there’s a twinkle in his eye….. not a good one. he knows all too well what daverose is. it’s me. i’m your cellmate. i commit ecoterrorism by burning a 1995 range rover it’s always sunny in philadelphia style while trying to become the physical embodiment of dennis reynolds. my dave shirts and red converse were in the passenger seat, i’ve gone through a complete personality change. you would never know it was me but here i am, hell. ready to put you so far into the depths of these incarceration grounds that half your url becomes your reality. anyway i hope you think i’m pretty when we meet in person :)
no i have a girlfriend
not for long xxx
you were literally asleep for this entire resurgence of daverose propaganda which means none of this can be filed on the divorce papers. try harder babe

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Probably should have posted these on homestuck day but whatevr I miss themmm
rose and dave drift and he’s like ok why do you wanna fuck these kaiju so bad
#but also if theyre related in this au dave being highly against drifting with rose bc she’ll see how right she is about all that freudian bs#or really anyone. no one can know he wants to fuck his sister
they spar and work and eat in perfect synchronization but when it comes to drifting he fuckin chokes
my girlfriend texted me this earlier today while we were talking about this exact fucking concept
LMAOOO rose would know this too so she’s like. look i get it you’re embarrassed about what you think about when you’re walking your dog. yankin your chain. makin the bald man cry. but there’s no reason to be self-conscious. everyone has odd sexual inclinations. (plus we have to get over this if we’re going to drift.) to help you feel better i’m going to list all of my specific fetishes, some of which overlap with each other –
dave gives a muffled scream and locks her out of the bunker
bold of you to assume he wouldn't lock himself out of the bunker after hearing that
@ca1e70 why can’t it be both
because then it would just be the amateur porno i hc him as having made w his high school girlfriend when they both turned 18 :/
Year 2: Week 45 (Alpha dave/jade is the best version of the ship I’ll die on this hill. Inspiration:
)
pacrim2 rose is newt au where she drift-fucks a kaiju brain
God, why did they make newt drift fuck a Kaiju brain?? He named it Alice
because he's hot and he deserves it

Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
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i want you all to know in your darkest hour i will appear like a phantom in the night solely to push you to the brink of the end of your frayed rope by reminding you that dave strider absolutely has a mommy kink and not even thirteen year olds with mischaracterization of karkat can prevent that. actually, if anything, they further the concept. somehow. i'll explain the logistics while violently shaking the rope between maniacal laughter
pacrim2 rose is newt au where she drift-fucks a kaiju brain