On day 4 my hormones are absolutely shattering me 🫠🫠 I feel so low and this weather isn't helping..I miss him and wish we could talk, but I know it's the hormones and that I should choose wisely when we *do* talk. Last time, for the first time ever, I felt so grounded and completely relaxed talking to him and I wish to feel like that always. The reason why I worried too much about how I sound to him is because I always put him on some higher *level*, way above me and that is not right nor helpful, but it might have to do with my submissive side. However, I remind myself now that our relationship is not *that* kind of relationship and that we already have enough power imbalances (big age gap, the way we've met etc) and simply do not need any more. 🤣

Busy week and I'm sorry to everyone for being behind on messaging, but I enjoy being without my phone, especially when I'm busy. I noticed that I'm a lot happier when I don't use my phone as much and feel more present and grounded! However, I do enjoy coming here just to talk to people and share my current thoughts and feelings.