Dont bullshit me confuscious.

MISHA COLLINS DID NOT JUST FUCKING—oH mY gOD

EHY DOESNT ANYONE EVER POST DETAILS

The avatar

Swiss army butthole

This is mildly blasphemous, but in the Toy Story universe do baby Jesus figurines from nativity sets think they’re actually Jesus, or are they just like. Babies

I mean do any babies have self awareness to know who they are

He looks exactly like Matt Damon

the finger points 😭😭

He dragged him for not listening lmao

That teacher is working so hard to keep his cool but I am a teacher, I speak teacher, and that man is having the best day of his entire career

… can i use that phrase irl?

Absolutely you can and I encourage more uses of similar phrases that just completely fuck up the chronology of the english langauge. I wanna hear 15th century english mixed with surfer speak mixed with current age internet lingo like all the time.

Like this? Well my dude, seems like a weasel hath not such a deal of splean as you’re toss’d with. Chill already, you’re not valid.

You are an unrighteous, bastardly gullion. Heaven truly knows that thou art false as hell. When you die, I will face God and walk backwards into hell just so that I can beat your ass in the afterlife too.

I love the idea of a vampire who’s language travels back in time as they get pissed.

I grieve for thee in these trying times. Alexa play Despacito

Reading these is like literary whiplash

Historical linguists decide to get especially ancient vampires pissed off in order to study ancient languages

are you telling me that if I get a 5000yo vampire angry enough I can directly test the glottalic theory?

*Pisses off a vampire so much that they teach me Minoan*

This just sounds like how scottish/irish people sound to me

Or you got a different strain the flu shot is predicting what strain of flu is most likely to be infectious that time of year but there are multiple strains that go around

"no you didn't get the flu from the flu shot" what people seem to not understand is that a lot of the discomfort people feel when they're sick is their body fighting the virus but not the virus itself (i.e runny nose/congestion/ swollen lymph nodes) so when you get a flu shot and you "feel sick" you're producing an immunal response to the vaccine... Everyone's immune system reacts differently.

top 3 rawest moments in anime

jim you absolute fucking madman

He did this to himself, and he’s pissed about it!

You guys are missing context, the cat is blind

I don't fucking care if it's manipulative, if your gf larps as an elf while talking to your relative who's undergoing chemo, you're allowed to humiliate her in front of her friends by larping as Naruto

The worst part of human adulthood is being your own zookeeper

Like... i have to make sure my meals are nutritionally balanced... i have to make sure that the space i occupy is big enough, and interesting enough, and provide enrichment to make up for the lack of novelty... i have to make sure i get exercise... i'm not qualified for this

I am a zookeeper in real life and I'm still not qualified to do this

girl help there is not enough enrichment in my enclosure

ive been looking for this for 3 hours

Is that cody ko