Lumos

effect of my parental abuse: I HATE intrusive noise. The sound of a door unlocking (even if it’s just my roommate). Just knocking. Footsteps in the morning sounding too close to my door. The sound of cars pulling up. The ding on my phone when they contact me. I associate it with the Vague and Uncomfortable Badness. Even at college, I hear that unlocking noise and my whole body habitually tenses up. I wish for the day that that sound no longer scares me but means that someone I love is here.

Feel all that excites you. Breathe in the music you love. Dance till you feel like you and your soul are separate from one another - dancing partners. Collect essays that make you cry. Make little festivals for yourself. Read poetry and whisper a little ‘thank you’ to the poet. Call every little trip an Adventure. Love till you feel alive again.

When I said that I was excited for the 'Roaring Twenties', I was referring to hedonism, excessive gay parties, and cool clothing. Not racism, antisemitism, and the looming threat of another World War.

Imagine having a group of friends who traverse through the forest with you, looking around for old crumbling structures and artifacts buried in the years worth of fallen leaves. Who will visit museums and art galleries and discuss the painting and galleries; pondering about the historical significance, or the hidden symbols. During cool rainy days, your group of friend would spend hours in a bookstore/library, picking out books that you or your friends would be interested in reading. After going to the library, you and your group would cozy down at a cafe, and look at the books you bought, and having discussions about the classes you are taking. When it gets late, you and your group would go to the bar, and listen to live music. All the while, through every moment, you would talk about your dreams, aspirations, philosophies and interests.

okay but tall candles in funky old candle holders??? cool old books with pretty spines and that really nice old book smell and beautiful language????? sweATERS and BUTTON DOWNS??? the LOOK????? ribbons in your hair???????? funky patterns on clothing???? plaid????? flowy skirts and classy pants with some really Nice Shoes????? walks through an open field at night and looking up at the stars????????? ajsjdhfjhfffbchfbcdgff !!!!!!! aaaaaaa!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

you expect me to act like a normal human being?  I’m wearing a turtleneck.

good night human beings may we fall in love with someone deserving