batgirls mind controlled

Some how some way babs gets dosed with a hefty amount of that shit its not nearly as interesting as the effects of it so im glossing over the how

but i think her reaction would heavily depend of what variety of it and where shes currently at in her life something yummy i think would be sometime after or even during NML like heavily stressed and with Cass under her wing

ive been thinking a lot about what her visions/hallucinations would be and i find myself fond of instead of like specific hallucinations its just like constant deorientation for her i think that would freak her out more than anything

shes so constantly put on a pedestal (tbh rightfully so) for her mind i think the toxin wiggling its way into her consciousness so much she can't discern what's real and what's not would drive her bonkers

like seeing shadows or hearing voices or things are suddenly too big or the wrong texture .. the tower is too hot

like a big migraine oh yes oh yes tunnel vison? oh yes . like she cant tell if her glasses are on or off that fucks with me sooo bad

MEMORRY FRAGMENTINGG i never see anybody talk about Babs' photographic memory/perfect recall like what if he took that from her that would be the perfect combination of fear and frustration

she's terrified and catatonic in the tower going through the effects and to top her already bad day off everybody is watching her break down. out of concern yes but shes shattering in front of them and its the kind of visceral shame that makes her eyes burn with tears

like oh thats good . her snark is turned up to a hundred , information is slipping from her she can't remember her parent's names she's forgetting how to do basic multiplication theres a gaping black hole of terror in her chest she might forget how to do basic functions

but its not real like in all actuality its just a hallucination and she wants to vomit because she thinks she can't remember dick's name but shes staring at his shoes just muttering it over and over under her breath and nobody can figure out what's wrong because she can't slot the words together ooooo and she just has to ride it out shaking and white knuckling her arm rests . trying to repeat everyone's names and features and interests so she doesn't lose it

and the physical symptoms!!!! phantom pain!!! sweating!!! shaking!!! there are phantom camera shutters flicking in her ears!!!! shes pale and her pupils are dilated and her heart is jack rabbiting in her chest pounding against her ribcage and theres new tremors in her fingers and her breath comes in huge gulps of air her throat is tight etc etc

oh man physical not really there symptoms are soooo good

and im a sucker for third party reactions too like dick is trying to comfort her and cass is shifting uncomfortably reading her body language but cass can't really verbalize what shes seeing and babs can't feel dick's touch and jpv is hovering and bruce is trying strong arm his way into figuring out wtf is going on but its all so hot and stuffy and overstimulating to babs and their voices are blurring together and shes hearing things rhat aren't there

dont even joke lad 🙏😈 voyeurism in lieu of comfort like the intentions are good but theres no real comfort because babs is suffering with every word spoken and every side hug or face grab and she thinks shes slurring her words and swaying in place but shes perfectly coherent in every way but the actual words coming from her they dont just slot in the right way

but then she comes down. the shame and embarrassment and hurt hits her like a truck . and it wasn't real and her brain isn't damaged and she jokes about it and laughs after and shoves it so far away deep inside of her ... but she will never ever forget what it felt like to truly lose herself and everyone around her so the next time scarecrow gets mentioned after shes a little more cautious a little more stressed and she works a little harder because she really really can't do that shit again

> anyways i think the crux of the fear for her stems from thinking too much but i think the overthinking continuously plaguing her even after the toxin works itself through her body is sooo buzzy too like she has to relearn how to trust herself shes paranoid and spiraling but now shes spiraling a looot more and it takes time for her to get her to calm back tf down like on the outside shes fine but she is inwardly on her last straw constantly worrying herself into her tremors reappearing , making contingencies ... the works

thanks for the ask, anon! i loveed writing this!!! sorry if i got a teensy bit off the ask for a little bit there, i got excited lmfao <3 but i tried to circle back and tie it into a neat little bow at the end <3 ty for listening ily