Well Shit

i mean, i know that NRC is the school for individualistic assholes who'd sooner choke than admit they care about anybody. i know that the cast members do grow to care about Prefect anyway (if you look at vignettes at least)

but like. i think it would be neat if more people not only noticed Prefect's circumstances, but were eaten by the knowledge. maybe not often or intensely, but still

Students A and B trudge through the snow on their way to the school building from the mirror hall; one of them glances at that corner of the campus past the greenhouse, and their complaining cuts off because imagine getting to the school from there.

Showers in one of the dorms broke for whatever reason, and suddenly Student C is wondering about the hot water situation over at Ramshackle, and whether it has any heating at all.

Student D is lying sleepless in the infirmary after yet another overblot incident. Their mind wanders to the Prefect and whether they've been badly hurt during; are they going to be okay? are they going to keep surviving this?

Student E catches a sight of Prefect in the cafeteria and wonders if they get enough to eat.

Student F randomly remembering that Prefect doesn't have any family to call.

🎨 -> @ephemii

Yuu, who cowers when Riddle starts to go red.

Yuu, who hates the feeling of sand and avoids brushing shoulders with Leona.

Yuu, who panics when they’re too deep in the water, never trusts the Leech twins at the beach, and get scared by too many limbs.

Yuu, who shrinks away when Jamil looks them in the eyes a little too long.

Yuu, who rushes to compliment Vil, lest he get upset.

Yuu, who clings to Grim a bit tighter and doesn’t like going to Ignihyde alone.

Yuu, who stays awake until they physically cannot because they’re scared they won’t wake up.

Crowley's was honestly so much fun to draw 😭✨

The whole thing was done using a pen brush, which makes it even funnier because whenever I get bored in class, I end up doodling with a blue ink pen.

Do you ever wonder if/when Yuu leaves to go back home with them, there will be little to no pictures/physical memory of them? How in every photo, every event, birthday, holiday, they were never captured, simply a silent observer always there but never included the way the others are.

Rummaging through ramshackle, through mountains of photos and god knows what else only to find everyone else photographed but Yuu. The realization that you don’t have any photo proof that they existed. Someone so important to you just gone.

Aah youth (⸝⸝- ̫ -⸝⸝)

Read the complete remaining pages on my ko-fi here~

VINE & FIRE

summary: haymitch loved her since he was ten, burdock’s little sister with stubborn eyes and a laugh he could never forget, a secret he kept close even as the world grew crueler. one stolen summer, under the oak tree and in the quiet meadow, they shared a fling that burned too bright and ended too soon - before the reaping, before his home burned and his family was gone, before he pushed her away to keep her safe from a world that would punish love. now she has been chosen for the 51st hunger games, and he is forced to mentor the girl he once loved, haunted by stolen kisses, broken promises, and everything they were never allowed to be. childhood friends, first love, and a vow that neither time nor tragedy can erase.

authors note: thank you everyone for all the love on the last chapter! anywaysss, so just a fare warning, this chapter may possibly break your heart. so sorry. i also tried to do the keep reading thing, i hope i did it right. enjoy! so sorry i'm a little late on uploading lol i'm posting this at 1am. i want to say i'm sorry in advance if some of this doesn't make sense - i did not profred this!

playlist:

warnings: EXTREME ANGST, not completely accurtate to sotr, gory, etc.

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VINE & FIRE

haymitch abernathy x f!everdeen reader

summary: haymitch loved her since he was ten, burdock’s little sister with stubborn eyes and a laugh he could never forget, a secret he kept close even as the world grew crueler. one stolen summer, under the oak tree and in the quiet meadow, they shared a fling that burned too bright and ended too soon - before the reaping, before his home burned and his family was gone, before he pushed her away to keep her safe from a world that would punish love. now she has been chosen for the 51st hunger games, and he is forced to mentor the girl he once loved, haunted by stolen kisses, broken promises, and everything they were never allowed to be. childhood friends, first love, and a vow that neither time nor tragedy can erase.

authors note: thank y'all so much for all the love on my last chapters! here is the long-awaited fourth chapter of vine & fire - i hope it lives up to ya'll's expectations. i'm sorry it's not too long. i've tried my best to make it as accurate to sotr as i could, but there may still be some aspects that were not canon to the book, so i apologize for that. i had only read half of the book when i got it for my bday when it came out, but i did go back to read some of the first chapter for this chapter! i really have to restart it lol nonetheless, i hope you love! ❤︎⁠

playlist:

warnings: lowkey bulling burdock if you squint, not completely canon to sotr.

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CHAPTER 4 - "HAPPY BIRTHDAY, HAYMITCH!" ❤︎

the sound of haymitch’s little ten-year-old brother, sid, wakes him from his slumber by yelling, “happy birthday, haymitch!”

to everyone else, today was reaping day — the day where two children would be sent off to be slaughtered for the entertainment of the capitol. and to his ma and sid, it was his sixteenth birthday— although haymitch only half-acknowledges that. to him, he agrees with everyone else. it’s reaping day. or, the day he just happened to be born.

haymitch rolls over and pulls the sheet over his head— it’s way too early, and the way too bright a sunlight streaming through the curtains isn’t helping. “happy birthday!” sid shouts again, giving his shoulder a shake. “you said be your rooster. you said you wanted to get to the woods at daylight.” haymitch sighs. he did say that, didn’t he? it was true— he wanted to get done what he needed so he could waste the rest of his day properly. and, of course, spend time with you in the meadow— under you and his tree, you wrapped up in his arms. just thinking about that alone gives him the motivation to get out of bed, he supposes.

however, he knew his ma wouldn’t make these plans too easy— he had responsibilities, and to her, those always came first. which, he always understood why that was the case. haymitch was sure that after he finished all his chores and everything else she demanded, she’d let him spend the rest of the day before the reaping with you. his birthday may have fallen on the worst day of the year, but knowing he had you this time around made the day a little less bleak.

when everything first started between you and haymitch, he didn’t want to tell his ma— maybe to save himself from the embarrassment, maybe to save himself from the inevitable teasing he knew he’d get from both his ma and sid— but that didn’t stop her from noticing the bright smile he wore when he came home from hunting in the woods, even if he’d caught nothing. or the time sid saw you planting a small kiss on haymitch’s cheek in the front yard while burdock had his back turned, talking to a older lady who lived in the seam.

sid ended up running into the house, finding his ma in the kitchen, and blabbering nonstop about it. a few minutes later, haymitch walked through the door, still wearing that same lovesick smile, and his ma just stood there with her arms crossed, that knowing look only a mother could pull off. sid lingered off to the side, covering his mouth to hide a grin.

haymitch realized then that his ma knew all along — but really, he was 99% sure she had always kind of known. she was just waiting for him to tell her, or, in this case, for sid to spill the news.

"haymitch!" sid wails, inturrupting haymitch's barely awake thoughts, "the sun's coming up!"

"all right, all right, i'm up, too," haymitch groans, rolling off the mattress and landing on the cold floor. he shivers for a second before getting to his feet and quickly dressing.

he makes his way to the kitchen and swipes a piece of cornbread. out back, his ma is already at work, stirring a kettle of clothes with a stick. she catches sight of him from the corner of her eye. "happy birthday. sauce on the stove."

haymitch turns and sees a small saucepan of stewed plums. he scoops a bit onto his bread with a knife before heading toward the door.

before he can leave, his ma calls after him, "need you to fill the cistern today."

they only had cold running water, which trickled slowly, and because of his ma’s laundry work for customers, the nicer barrel of pure rainwater was never for them.

it would take haymitch at least two hours to pump enough cold water. he lets out a soft sigh. "can't it wait until tomorrow?"

his ma just lets out the same sigh right back. "i'm running low, and i've got a mountain of wash to do," she says.

haymitch tries to hide his frustration when he mutters, "this afternoon, then," assuming, of course, that nothing bad will happen during the reaping. at least, not to him. but he knows today will be four kids’ worst day of their lives—considering it’s the quarter quell—twice the number of tributes, twice the amount of bloodshed. he doesn’t want to think about that, though. he has to, every year. so, he pushes the thought aside, focusing on what he needs to get done so he can see you later.

so, haymitch makes his way through the empty cinder street to the hill, or the miner' graveyard. that's where his pa is burried, and one day, he'll be burried there too. that's where all the abernathy's are laid to rest. he does a quick glance left and right, looking for anyone who'd even be awake this early, which they never usually are, and ducks his head through the fence into the woods outside of twelve. there, haymitch began to make his way to hattie's, where he'll help brew white liquor for a little while.

it’s the usual routine—chores, work with hattie, then seeing you in the meadow. it’s not much, but it’s his life. a life that, before summer, felt dull, empty, and lonely. sure, he had burdock to go hunting with, but now, with you in it, even the smallest things—the sunlight through the trees, the smell of earth and wildflowers—feel brighter, warmer. you made his days brighter. you made them worth getting out of bed for.

there was a lot of grulling, grunt work that came with working with hattie but haymitch never minded. he didn't mind the work, and he didn't mind the company of hattie. she was a sweet older lady who worked hard, and expected him to do the same— if not more. so, he spend the time of the day he was required to be her mule— hauling grain, corn, and carrying full bottles of liquor to be refilled.

it takes haymitch about half an hour to reach still, where he finds hattie stirring a pot of mash. she offers him the wooden spoon, her face soft with a smile. "why don't you give this a stir?"

haymitch drops the bags of corn under the lean-to where they keep all the supplies and takes the spoon, grinning and holding it up like a trophy. "whoa, a promotion!" he jokes. he usually never handled the mash itself—mostly the heavy lifting for hattie—but today, it’s different. he often talked to you about maybe one day becoming business partners with hattie, imagining how much more they could earn together.

hattie begins packing pint bottles of white liquor into a moss-lined basket as haymitch stirs the mash on and off. once it cools, he pours it into a bucket and she adds the yeast. he sets the mash in the lean-to so it can ferment properly. she isn’t distilling today, not on reaping day—doing so could draw the wrong attention from peacekeepers. the local ones might turn a blind eye if smoke rises from the mist, but the capitol’s hovercrafts would never. so there’s no hauling today, only chopping wood for haymitch, a welcome break from the usual labor.

sometimes, hattie throws in a "tip" for haymitch— like, a packet of yeast he could sell at the hob, or like today a pint of white liquor for his own use— he knew you didn't drink much, thanks to your ma instilling it in your brain that drinking turns your brain to mush—which created the never ending joke between the both of you which is why burdock has the brain of a rock because him and astrid sneak away to drink too much by the lake— and neither did he, he wasn't much of a drinker himself— it was his birthday, and hattie being the kind lady she was, he accepted the gift with gratitude nonethless. he was sure some peacekeeper would buy it, or he could trade it for something. besides, his paycheck went right to his ma when he got it.

"happy birthday, haymitch. i figured if you're old enough to make it, you're old enough to drink it." hattie says. haymitch gives her a hug that hattie didn't expect— she yelps, but hugs him back. she wasn't too big on affection— whereas, haymitch usually tended to be the opposite. "oh, enough of that. you still sparking with miss everdeen?"

haymitch didn't even know how hattie knew about you and him— it must've still been his eyes— his ma always said his eyes gave away everything he was thinking— maybe hattie knew that, too.

"i'm sure trying," haymitch says with a laugh, "go bother her, then. you're no use of me today." she shoos him away as haymitch smiles, happy to be released from work for the day. 

he thinks, briefly, about going back home and working on that stupid cistern. he knows his ma will remind him later. but it’s his birthday, and for once, he wants to enjoy it. and enjoying it means stealing a few kisses from the girl he loves, tucked away from the rest of the world. even just for a little while.

so haymitch doesn’t waste a second. he runs through the meadow, feet quick and familiar on the grass, knowing exactly where you’ll be. the morning sunlight filters through the trees brighter now than it had when he first woke, birds sang overhead. he just knows your under that tree, harmonizing with them.

and then he sees you.

your hair is down, falling freely across your back, and you’re wearing his favorite dress—the old light pink one, worn thin and stained with mud from years of running and sitting and living. sure, it’s marked and imperfect, but to haymitch, that only makes it special. it means you’ve been here. it means you’ve lived in it, loved in it.

and that’s the way haymitch sees everything you touch.

he slowly creeps up behind you, wearing that boyish smile you love—the one you always call his trouble smile when you catch it at the wrong moment. you’re holding a small dandelion between your fingers, humming softly along with the birds. right again, haymitch thinks. you’re always so easy for him to read. too predictable— at least to him.

he lifts his hands and gently covers your eyes. you gasp softly before he can feel your cheeks pull into a smile beneath his palms. haymitch leans down, his mouth close to your ear. “guess who?”

you giggle, playing along, and he can practically feel the eye roll you give him. “hm,” you say thoughtfully, “possibly my stalker?”

that earns a laugh from him. “your stalker?” he scoffs playfully. “well, that ain’t nice.”

he pulls his hands away and looks down at you, really looks. your eyes sparkle as you smile up at him, warm and familiar and entirely his. before you can say anything else, haymitch leans down and kisses you— soft, quick. then another. and another. until his hand comes up to cradle your face, thumb brushing your cheek like it belongs there.

“happy birthday, mitch." you say quietly, almost like a whisper “didn’t expect to see you until later.”

your cheeks are still flushed, a faint blush dusting your skin. even after a few weeks of being officially together, haymitch still manages to make you blush like it’s the very first time.

haymitch knew what you meant— you meant after the reaping. but he didn’t want to talk about that. didn’t even want to acknowledge it, not yet. just for the time being. not until he had to. not until he was standing in the dreaded town square, surrounded by everyone, waiting for names to be pulled from glass.

he sighs softly. “hattie let me go early,” he says, offering you a small smile. “gave me this too— a present for my big day.” he pulls out the bottle of white liquor.

“well, that won’t be hard to trade. especially for today.” you take the bottle from him, turning it in your hands, inspecting it. then your expression shifts. “four kids…” you murmur. “that’s going to hit a lot of families.”

you frown, just slightly— but it’s enough. haymitch notices immediately. he always does.

i guess we’re gonna talk about it, he thinks, meeting your worried eyes.

“it’s gonna be all right,” he says.

but the words feel hollow the moment they leave his mouth. like they don’t belong to him. like they’re carrying too much uncertainty, like today will ruin four families lives. four kids will die in that arena, and there's nothing— absolutely nothing — anyone can do to stop it.

you bite your lip softly, looking away for a moment before turning back to haymitch. “i got you a gift,” you say, smiling gently. your eyes have that same sparkle he loves so much— like the world hasn’t gotten its hands on you yet.

he sighs again, this time in relief. you aren’t pushing. not right now. haymitch matches your smile, tilting his head just a bit. “you didn’t have to do that,” he says, voice soft— fond in a way he never bothers hiding with you. you always were good-natured. kind in a way that made everything else feel quieter.

you smile again. “c’mon, everyone deserves a gift on their birthday. now, close your eyes.”

according to you, everyone deserved something—whether that was a little gift on their birthday, or a dumb nickname like mitch. either way, haymitch just went along with it. the boy was a fool.

his eyebrows knit together in playful suspicion. “you’re not gonna tie me up to this tree and abandon me, right?”

you scoff, rolling your eyes. “maybe, if you keep talkin’.”

there it is— that sass. haymitch feels a smirk tug at his lips. he lets out an exaggerated sigh and closes his eyes.

you gently take his calloused hands, turning one palm up. something soft is placed there. he lets his fingers curl around it slowly. it feels delicate. like a flower— no, flowers. knowing you, it almost certainly is. he smiles to himself, waiting patiently.

“okay, open your eyes.”

he does— and his chest tightens.

it’s small. wildflowers, tied together by their stems into a bracelet. it probably won’t even fit his wrist right. it looks fragile, like one strong breeze could pull it apart— but it’s yours. made by your hands.

and haymitch knows, right then, he’d never let wind or rain or anything else touch it. not if he could help it. not when it’s something so precious, made by his girl.

he meets your waiting eyes then. he can tell by the look on your face— and by the way your hands slowly slip out of his— that you’re waiting for his reaction.

haymitch just smiles. “thank you. i love it,” he says, then squints a little. “is it, uh… a bracelet?”

you nod, smiling as you reach for his wrist. you try to slip it on, careful, and somehow it fits. barely. it looks like it’s holding on by a thread. or, in this case, a stem.

haymitch turns his wrist, examining it once more before leaning in and kissing you. it’s soft, unhurried— “it’s beautiful,” he murmurs against your lips. “i’ll never take it off.”

you pull back just enough to look at him, one hand coming up to rest against his cheek. “just be careful with it, okay?” you say quietly. “it’s really delicate. i know it’s not much—”

he cuts you off before you can say anything else, smiling wide and sure. “it’s perfect,” he says. “you could put pure gold in my hands, and i’d still rather have this.”

he won’t let you doubt it. not for a second. as far as haymitch is concerned, this is the best gift he could’ve ever been given.

he looks down at the wildflowers again. they smell fresh—like sunshine. like you. bright purple, soft yellow, a flash of blue, all woven together by your hands. something simple. something real. something he knows he’ll carry with him, even when the flowers start to wither away.

then, haymitch thought about your birthday coming up— fifteen, almost fifteen. exactly one year younger than him. he figured he’d have to come up with something good this time. maybe ma could whip up one of her pies, or maybe he’d gather some wildflowers, something simple, something you’d like. it didn’t have to be fancy, he knew that. it was you, and that was enough. he imagined the little grin you’d give him, the way your eyes always got that tiny spark when he did something just for you. yeah… that would be worth it.

haymitch hesitates for just a second, watching the sunlight catch in your hair, thinking about how much he wants to freeze this moment. but the morning air is cool, brushing his skin, and he knows time doesn’t wait—especially today.

“come on,” he says softly, taking your hand.

you nod, tugging him toward the little clearing where the grass grows taller, the wildflowers thickest. haymitch lets out a quiet laugh when you dart ahead, barefoot, spinning in the sunlight as if you own the morning.

he takes it all in—your hair flying, your laugh echoing, the way your eyes light up—and he swears he could memorize it all. you were his living, breathing, daydream.

“hey,” he calls after you, and you pause mid-spin, tilting your head back at him with a grin. “don’t you dare run off. i’m catching you.”

he sprints, shoes kicking up little clouds of dirt, until he’s close enough to sweep you into his arms. you squeal and struggle just a little, but it’s a game he always wins. he spins you once, twice, then sets you down gently, brushing your hair from your face.

"you're so beautiful, y/n everdeen," haymitch says, eyes soft and lovestruck, the way he always looked at you when no one was watching. he wanted to say it—wanted to tell you he loved you, utterly, without reservation—but he didn’t. not yet. he was sure you knew. you had to know. he loved you with every fiber of his being, like all-fire, unstoppable.

why don’t you just say it? his thoughts pounded, his chest tight, heart racing as he drank in every familiar detail of your face, every feature that had stopped him in his tracks all those years.

you smile softly, "don't get all sappy on me, haymitch abernathy." your forehead presses to his, arms winding around his waist, and he feels goosebumps across his skin. he closes his eyes for a moment, savoring it, before opening them again and thinking the same sentence over and over.

why don’t you just say it? just say i love you.

his breath hitches. he opens his mouth, ready to speak the words he’s wanted to say for so many years. he works up the small muster of courage, and right as he was about to say those three words that hold so much meaning—

the reaping siren blares.

his moment shatters.

at least… he has next time.

right?

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tag list:

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@sundawn1990

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VINE & FIRE

haymitch abernathy x f!everdeen reader

summary: haymitch loved her since he was ten, burdock’s little sister with stubborn eyes and a laugh he could never forget, a secret he kept close even as the world grew crueler. one stolen summer, under the oak tree and in the quiet meadow, they shared a fling that burned too bright and ended too soon - before the reaping, before his home burned and his family was gone, before he pushed her away to keep her safe from a world that would punish love. now she has been chosen for the 51st hunger games, and he is forced to mentor the girl he once loved, haunted by stolen kisses, broken promises, and everything they were never allowed to be. childhood friends, first love, and a vow that neither time nor tragedy can erase.

author's note: i actually love every single one of you who read my writing, like genuinely thank you so much. btw, in this chapter, i felt like i was using too much narration/third person pov in my last chapters, so now it's second pov. sooo, i hope it may be better now haha lmk if this is the pov y'all prefer!

playlist:

warnings: a little kissing, small implications of a physical description for reader, mention of lenore dove, think that's all lol

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CHAPTER 3 - "THE LAST SUMMER" ❤︎

it was finally summer again here in twelve. summer meant new possibilities, and summer meant more small, still moments with you. there weren’t nearly as many of those moments during the school season as there were in summer, mostly because haymitch and you were a lot busier between september and march.

haymitch was still working with hattie meeney. she was an illicit moonshiner - haymitch helped her out some now that he was older. he had a few different jobs that helped his ma and his little brother, sid, but working with hattie got him the most pay.

haymitch was turning sixteen this summer. he had grown into his features - his jaw more structured, his shoulders broader, even taller than he was when he first hit puberty at thirteen. his hair was still unruly with blonde curls, though his ma had given up trying to convince him to cut it after he turned fourteen.

he’d even noticed at school that girls were starting to actually notice him now, not just as burdock’s friend. sometimes they smiled at him in the halls, sometimes they whispered.

none of that mattered to him, though. because even after all these years, you were still the girl who haunted his thoughts when he woke up every morning, and the last one he thought about before he fell asleep at night.

you were different, too, this year. not in personality - you were still the same kind, witty girl haymitch had always known - but you had grown into your features. your hair fell longer now, cascading past your shoulders in soft waves that caught the sunlight like spun gold. your eyes seemed brighter somehow, and your smile had grown warmer, more confident, like you carried a quiet joy that could light up the room without even trying. your laugh was lighter too.

every detail reminded him why, even at fifteen, almost sixteen, he couldn’t imagine his world without you.

you and that boy, miles, had ended things barely a week after you’d started dating, all those years ago. haymitch remembered the moment burdock told him - he’d been sitting on the edge of the old fence post by the meadow, pretending he wasn’t listening, pretending he didn't feel like he wanted to run a marathon because he was so happy.

he hated how happy that made him. he didn’t want you to be hurt, didn’t want you to feel sad or lonely. but you hadn’t been sad at all. you’d laughed about it later, called it awkward, said it felt more like pretending than actually liking someone.

and haymitch had smiled like a fool for the rest of the day, because selfish as it was, he felt as if he finally, finally had a chance again.

though that was two years ago now, you still weren’t his - at least, not officially. but every year, every summer, felt like a fresh start, a little chance for things to change.

burdock had just come off his shift in the mines, smelling of burned ash and smoke. black splotches of coal dotted his suspenders, and his hair was greasy from the work. haymitch met him outside, expecting a greeting - but burdock didn’t even bother. he just said, with a grin “astrid and i kissed last night.”

oh, astrid. the name he’d been hearing for weeks now - the blonde girl with bright blue eyes and fair skin that burdock was completely smitten with.

burdock had gone on a date with her last night, and apparently, they’d kissed. haymitch knew the two of them would probably end up together one day, and he was happy for his best friend - but he couldn’t help the pang in his chest, wishing he had his own love story with you.

“that’s great, man,” haymitch said with a small smile. “you gonna ask her to be your girlfriend?”

burdock shrugged, brushing some soot off his suspenders. “i think so. i wanna do somethin’ nice for her, you know? maybe go to the meadow, pick some flowers for her or somethin’ like that.”

haymitch half-smiled, and then it hit him - flowers. flowers. you love flowers. maybe he could bring you some, tell you how he really felt - but what if you rejected him? what if he made everything weird? before he could spiral further, burdock’s voice cut through his thoughts.

“haymitch? hello?” burdock waved his hand in front of his face, grinning. “you think she’d like that? she probably would, right? i mean, all girls like flowers.”

haymitch blinked, realizing he’d been staring at the ground, lost in his own head. “uh… yeah,” he said, forcing a smile. “she’d… probably like that.”

burdock just smiled and said, "great. because we are gonna go find some flowers." he patted haymitch's shoulder and started walking toward the meadow, haymitch falling in step beside him.

on these first few days of summer, haymitch hadn’t expected to be traipsing through the grass with burdock, looking for flowers. but he figured it was a good chance to get an idea of what to pick for you someday soon. he just… had to figure out the right way to do it. would he wait until he saw you at the hob again? no - you were always with your friends there. would he wait until burdock was at work and just knock on your door? no, that didn’t feel right either. with every step closer to the meadow, his thoughts drifted farther and farther, caught between flowers, your smile, and the nervous hope that maybe, just maybe, this summer could be different.

"are you okay? you seem really space-y today," burdock asked, glancing at haymitch.

haymitch blinked, snapping out of his daydream. "yeah… i'm fine."

burdock just chuckled, "no you ain't. what’re you thinking about? lenore dove?"

lenore dove. haymitch felt a little tug in his heart at the mention of her name. she was a covey girl who had a small crush on him - she’d stop by sometimes when he was helping hattie, just to chat. haymitch didn’t dislike her; she was sweet, really pretty even. but, just like every other girl, she… just wasn’t you.

"nah… it ain't lenore dove" haymitch said, lightly kicking a rock in his path.

burdock furrowed his eyebrows, "really? she seems to really like you," he said.

haymitch felt bad - though he wasn't sure why. maybe it was guilt because he knew in his heart he’d probably never have true feelings for anyone else if you were still in the picture. or maybe it was because he’d been carrying these feelings quietly since he was ten, watching you grow up alongside him, and knowing that no one - no one - could replace you in his mind.

he kicked the rock a little farther down the path, letting it skitter across the dirt, and tried to push the thought aside. but it stuck, like always. every step toward the meadow felt heavier with it, yet lighter at the same time - because summer meant you, and you meant everything.

eventually, burdock and haymitch reached the meadow and haymitch's heart leaped in his chest when he saw you.

you - sitting under a tree, that same journal in your hand - looked up just as they arrived. haymitch felt his breath hitch, subtly. your hair was down, catching the sunlight, you were barefoot, and you wore a bright, forest green dress that swayed slightly in the warm summer breeze. a few blades of grass brushed against your ankles as you shifted.

as if on cue, you looked up and burdock furrowed his brows, placing his hands on his hips. "what're you doin' here?" he questioned, annoyance clear in his tone.

you matched his stance, also putting your hands on your hips. "i'm sorry, do you own the meadow now?" you tilted your head and squinted your eyes, challenging him in that same stubborn way you always did.

and there you were. the beautiful, stubborn, impossible, utterly captivating vision that you are.

haymitch couldn't help but smile, he caught your eye as he did so - you smiled at him and haymitch felt his heart flutter, like it always did.

burdock rolled his eyes, and walked closer "you just gotta be everywhere i go, huh?" you laugh as you pick up the yellow wilflower that was laying next to your journal, "i was here first." you tilted your head as you spun your pencil in your hand.

"oh, now who sounds like own the meadow?" burdock says in a mocking voice.

it was always funny to haymitch how, even at fourteen and sixteen, you argued like you were still little kids - well, almost fifteen in your case. your birthday was coming up soon.

burdock was about to say something when he looked up and noticed the sun setting in the sky - his eyes went wide - he’d gotta be back to work soon.

he groaned, spinning on his heel back toward town. "i gotta go. i'll haveta' get those flowers later!" before either of you knew it, he was already halfway down the gravel path.

you furrowed your eyebrows, smiling at haymitch. "flowers?" you asked, your voice soft.

haymitch smiled. "yeah, for astrid."

you hummed in acknowledgment. "they seem to be gettin' close."

the sky was a light pink, orange-ish color - casting a warm, golden glow across your face. you looked like an angel - something almost ethereal.

haymitch started to walk a little closer toward you. "yeah, seems so. he's gonna ask her to be his girlfriend soon."

you smiled, motioning for him to sit next to you. haymitch felt that familiar rush he always did around you - his heart raced, and his palms got clammy as he eased himself beside you.

he could smell the faint floral scent lingering on you, and he could count every freckle and beauty mark on your face. he noticed the flutter of your eyelashes, the way your lips held the softest shade of pink, and for a moment, it felt like the world had narrowed just to the two of you.

haymitch could feel you looking at him. the second your eyes met, the air felt different - like every moment, every feeling, had been building up to this one.

he quickly looked away, nervous - more nervous than he’d ever been before, even more than before any reaping. his eyes drifted to the journal lying beside you, then back to you. "what do you even write in that?" he asked softly.

you just smiled, tilting your head. "nothin'. just silly things." you looked away, but haymitch didn’t - he stayed watching you.

haymitch smiles as he tries to pick up the journal. "like what? all your deep, dark secrets?" he says in a playful tone. in a quick second, you snatch the journal out of his hands, laughing. "no, it’s none of your business!" you giggle - you giggled. he hadn’t heard you laugh like that in forever, not like that, not just with him.

haymitch reaches out and tries to grab the journal back, still laughing, still teasing. it’s all clumsy and playful until he loses his balance and almost falls on top of you. you both freeze. your faces are only inches apart, and he can feel your breath on his face, warm and shaky.

haymitch can’t help the way his eyes flicker from your eyes to your lips. the birds are still singing somewhere, and the trees still rustle in the wind, but it all feels distant. the only thing he can really hear is his breathing - and yours.

his heart is racing, and he’s pretty sure yours is too. for a second, it feels like the world has stopped, like it’s just the two of you.

this was different than the other summers - way different. this time, you looked like you felt the same nerves he did. your eyes flicker from his eyes to his lips, too, and his heart almost stops.

was this it? was this the moment haymitch had been waiting for years? what about burdock? their oath? he’d kill him if he ever found out.

but before the fears could keep creeping in, haymitch leans down and kisses you. the kiss is soft - hesitant - but it feels like a million butterflies take flight in his stomach all at once.

and then you kiss back. just as softly, tilting your head to follow his. haymitch moves his hand up to cup your face, and you slide your hand to his back, pulling him a little closer.

this was everything he’d ever dreamed about - no, better than that. he was kissing you. and you were kissing him.

from that moment forward - if haymitch hadn’t already been in love with you, he definitely was now. something about you had changed. you seemed lighter somehow, like you carried a glow that wasn’t there before.

maybe it was because you started meeting him in the meadow before work, sitting with him in the quiet while the world was still half asleep. maybe it was the way you smiled at him now, like you knew his thoughts before he even said them. or maybe it was just the fact that that summer, you were each other’s first everything.

either way, haymitch knew one thing for sure - after that, nothing was ever going to feel the same again.

they spent their days tangled up under that same tree where they’d shared their first kiss - his hand threading through your hair as he looked at you like the world had only just begun, and you looked at him the same way, as if every other day before him had been meaningless.

he told you everything. how he’d carried this feeling since he was ten, how he’d waited, quietly for the right moment when you might notice. you told him you’d always loved him too - and that journal, that silly little book you carried everywhere, held every thought and feeling you’d never dared speak aloud.

it couldn’t get better than this. it couldn’t. when you spoke the words, your hand gently cupping his face, it was like he could see your entire future in your eyes. a life just waiting to be yours. he imagined you in a simple white dress, a cheap ring on your finger. he imagined children running barefoot through the yard, goats under the warm sun, a small, happy farm that was yours alone. he imagined waking up to you every morning, the quiet moments of laughter and soft conversation, and holding your hand when you were old, hearts still beating together, until the very end.

haymitch, even as a kid, had known he would protect you with everything he had. if he could help it, you would never see a day where you were hurt. he vowed to make you happy - to make sure that in every moment, every situation - haymitch would be there. he made it his mission, his purpose, to take care of you, always.

even more so now - sitting under that same tree where he’d kissed you for the first time, he felt the weight of that promise settle in his heart. the meadow was shadowed by the golden in the sunset, the air humming with the songs of birds and the rustle of leaves. in that quiet, perfect moment, he knew that this - your laughter, the touch of your hand, the way your hair caught the sunlight - was worth every worry, every fear he had ever carried. he would protect it, protect you, for as long as he lived.

and as the sun started to set once again, haymitch knew one thing for certain - no matter what the world had waiting for him, for now, this - you, this meadow, this summer - was his.

or it was.

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taglist:

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@stylesann

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VINE & FIRE

haymitch abernathy x f!everdeen reader

summary: haymitch loved her since he was ten, burdock’s little sister with stubborn eyes and a laugh he could never forget, a secret he kept close even as the world grew crueler. one stolen summer, under the oak tree and in the quiet meadow, they shared a fling that burned too bright and ended too soon - before the reaping, before his home burned and his family was gone, before he pushed her away to keep her safe from a world that would punish love. now she has been chosen for the 51st hunger games, and he is forced to mentor the girl he once loved, haunted by stolen kisses, broken promises, and everything they were never allowed to be. childhood friends, first love, and a vow that neither time nor tragedy can erase.

authors note: i'm like in love with this series. i hope y'all are (or will be) too! (: this took me 3 hours to write LOL

playlist:

warnings: haymitch being a yearner, small implications of a physical description for reader, mention of killing a bird/deer, etc, not proofred.

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CHAPTER 2 - "THE NICKNAME" ❤︎

crunch. crunch. crunch.

the familiar sound echoed beneath haymitch’s feet as he followed the same old path to his best friend’s house. except this time, he wasn’t swinging around a stick and pretending it was a sword like he used to. he was practically grown now - for real. he was thirteen, which meant standing in line with all the other kids, waiting to see if his name would be called for the hunger games when his birthday, the fourth of july, rolled around. just like last year. his first year. he hadn’t been picked then.

haymitch didn’t want to think about that, though.

he didn’t do that stupid kid stuff anymore… not unless his neighbor and ten-year-old sweetheart, louella, asked him, anyway.

his hair was still those shaggy, wild blonde curls that his ma always tried to cut off whenever she got the chance - he never let her. he always said she’d scare the ladies away if she did, but in reality, he only really cared about y/n’s opinion anyway. he was sure his ma probably knew that too. she always teased him whenever she got the chance. whenever he came home from burdock’s house with that same love-struck look on his face, she’d ask if y/n was there. he’d always deny it, or say she wasn’t there when she was. but ma always knew - even if burdock didn’t. haymitch wanted to believe she maybe liked his hair. there was always the chance that it wasn’t true, but haymitch didn’t want to believe it.

and once again, he passed the familiar dandelions surrounding the small goat pen next to his best friend’s house. the flowers were in full bloom - haymitch always loved it when they were, because that meant y/n was going to pick them at some point, probably humming to herself, probably brushing a stray curl behind her ear, and probably making his heart feel like it was racing a million miles per second. she always had that effect on him. he sometimes hated how gone he was for her - and how he had to hide it.

haymitch walked up the steps to the everdeen’s front door and knocked softly, hoping y/n would be the one to answer again, like last week. last week was the official first day of summer, and of course, he’d gone over to his best friend’s house after school. they were planning to go hunting in the meadow, maybe shoot down some birds, but instead of burdock opening the door - or his ma - she did.

and sure, he’d seen her at school that day, but seeing her again… she never failed to take his breath away. haymitch felt silly, very silly, every time his face warmed up just because she looked in his direction. it was embarrassing, probably, but he didn’t really care. not when she smiled.

and wow. that smile. so beautiful. she was a vision.

unfortunately, it was burdock’s ma who opened the door. it wasn’t like haymitch was mad or didn’t like mrs. everdeen - he just really hoped y/n would be the one to answer.

mrs. everdeen smiled softly, holding a wooden spoon in her right hand with an apron tied around her waist. she was probably making lunch; it was around one, now that he thought about it. “hey, sweetheart. how are you?” she moved slightly out of the way so haymitch could walk inside.

haymitch intertwined his hands and stepped through the door. “i’m good, mrs. everdeen. thanks for asking.” he smiled politely, while subtly trying to maneuver his head around her, hoping to catch a glimpse of y/n - maybe in her room brushing her hair, or maybe at the dining room table braiding flowers together like she always did.

she was so talented. she couldn’t ever do anything wrong in haymitch’s eyes.

instead, he saw burdock walk out of his room, holding the crossbow his pa had made for him for his thirteenth birthday a few weeks ago. “these birds don’t know what’s comin’ for them with this thing,” burdock grinned, trying to spin the crossbow and ultimately dropping it as it clattered against the wooden floor.

the noise caught mrs. everdeen’s attention immediately. she put her hands on her hips and shot him a scolding look. “burdock, you better hope that crossbow ain’t broke. your daddy’ll be so mad at you.” her tone was stern, but haymitch could see a hint of a smile.

haymitch tried to hold back his laughter at the nervous look on his best friend’s face as burdock quickly picked up the crossbow, inspecting it for any damage. “it’s fine, ma,” burdock said, squinting at it. “you better hope so,” she replied with a half smile.

and then he saw her - and time seemed to slow down.

there she was.

her hair was braided, with a few loose strands framing her face. she was wearing a pale pink dress with a few dirt stains on it, but he knew it was her favorite anyway - or at least he assumed so. she always wore it to school, even in the winter, paired with her brown coat and dusted-up boots.

y/n was holding her journal, the one haymitch always saw her writing in at school or at the dining room table. the little book, worn at the edges and held close to her chest, seemed like a world all her own. he was always curious about what she wrote, the way her brows would furrow in thought.

but he didn’t want to sneakily steal it, or find out on his own like he might with anyone else. he wanted her to tell him herself.

he wanted to be the one she came to with her problems, even the silly ones. he wanted to know her heart, as well as her mind. he wanted to know about her day, what made her laugh, what her favorite food was, what her dreams were - who she wanted to be one day. haymitch wanted to know everything that made up y/n everdeen.

but he knew that might never happen. he didn’t want to go home with a black eye from burdock, or break the trust of his best friend. he made an oath with burdock all those years ago, and he intends to keep it - at least for now.

then she looked up to meet haymitch’s eyes - and that oath kinda left his mind for a moment. he could happily drown in her eyes. she smiled softly at him as she set her journal down on the table and crossed her arms.

“where are y’all off to today?” she asked.

haymitch was about to answer when burdock looked over his shoulder at his sister and gave her that same brotherly glare. “you ain’t comin’, y/n. we’re goin’ hunting. you’ll be bored anyway.”

she put her hands on her hips, that stubborn look in her eyes that she always had - only sharper now that she was older. haymitch loved it, especially when she paired that look with her furrowed eyebrows.

“i like huntin’,” she said.

before burdock could protest, mrs. everdeen appeared, wearing the same scowl as y/n, and said, “burdock, what’s the rule?” she lowered her head slightly, waiting for him to answer. he knew the rule. haymitch knew the rule. y/n was allowed to be his shadow whenever she wanted, even if burdock hated it. haymitch, of course, didn’t mind the rule at all.

haymitch always felt awkward when y/n and burdock fought, because he felt caught in the middle. he rarely ever got involved, but it was still a weird situation for him just standing there.

y/n just smirked when mrs. everdeen reminded burdock of the rule. haymitch wanted to laugh, or at least smile but he decided against it.

burdock cut his eyes at y/n, then looked at his ma and said, “fine.”

he turned away from her, looked at haymitch, and rolled his eyes. haymitch smiled then. he looked over at y/n who smiled brightly, "y'all wait for me! i'm gonna grab my shoes." haymitch noticed she always almost said the same thing everytime they were about to leave the everdeen house - to always wait for her, and he always did. metaphorically, and physically.

as they waited, burdock started telling haymitch about his brand-new crush on a girl from school named astrid. burdock always thought a lot of girls were pretty, but the way he talked about astrid sounded different - like he might actually like this one.

haymitch had seen her once or twice at school, but she was always quiet, so he never really talked to her. apparently, burdock had a life-changing crush on the girl. haymitch knew what that was like, of course, but he wouldn’t ever tell burdock that - obviously.

then finally, y/n walked out of her room. her hair was down now, falling along her shoulders. haymitch always liked y/n with her hair down, but he never thought of her any differently if it was braided or draped over her shoulders. she was beautiful either way. she could have no hair at all, and haymitch would probably still look at her as if he’d never seen another girl in his life.

sometimes, haymitch wondered how burdock hadn’t caught on to his little crush on his sister. burdock wasn’t dumb, but maybe he was clueless. burdock was good at math, whereas haymitch wasn’t. haymitch was better at reading.

nobody knew, and haymitch made sure nobody - especially y/n - ever knew about the letters he wrote about her in his notebook back at his house. his ma had gotten it for him before school last year, originally supposed to be used for writing school work, but haymitch had used it to pour his feelings onto paper for y/n. he’d write about what he was feeling that day when he saw her at school, or with her friends at the hob.

it was so embarrassing, really. it was bewildering to him how much a girl could make him feel like such a hopeless loser.

before haymitch could ponder any more on his secretly written love notes, burdock said, "okay, let's go. them birds probably already done flew away by now." haymitch, burdock, and y/n all said goodbye to mrs. everdeen and walked the familiar path to the meadow. you had to get through the meadow to reach the electrical fence that separated the deep woods from the district. the tall grass brushed against their legs and the warm summer breeze carried the faint scent of wildflowers mixed with the earthy smell of the woods.

y/n always hated the fence. she was always some sort of scared of it. haymitch thought about how unlucky he'd be if he ever got struck by the wires, but he didn’t put as much thought into it as she did. the three of them reached the fence, and burdock immediately ducked through the wires, crushing the leaves beneath his feet toward the woods. halfway through, almost getting swatted in the face by a tree limb, burdock turned and waited for haymitch and his sister.

haymitch was the first to follow, ducking through the wires. as always, he waited for y/n to do the same. she squinted her eyes at the fence, hesitant. haymitch gave her a soft smile, crouched down, and held his hand out for her to take. "c’mon, i got you."

y/n took his hand and ducked through the wire, avoiding the live strands. she almost tripped on a small ant pile below her, and haymitch caught her before she could fall. haymitch had never done that before - sure, he'd touched her hand just a few seconds ago helping her through the fence and the time he lightly brushed her hand all those years ago when she gave haymitch those yellow primroses, but he’d never found himself holding her waist, helping her balance. his hands were steady on her hips, warm against the soft cotton of her dress. she looked down at his hands, then slowly up at him, and the sun caught in her hair, making the strands shimmer like gold in the light.

it felt like the world slowed down again, just like it did when he saw her at the everdeen house twenty minutes ago. the scent of wildflowers and the sweet summer air surrounded them, the distant rustle of leaves and chirping birds fading into the background. but this time, he thought she felt the same thing he did. her eyes were sparkling, and for the first time, he felt like they shared a moment. he wondered if this was the kind of moment his ma had told him about when he asked what it was like when she and his pa first met. she told him it was like nobody else existed in the world except them both - and that pretty much described how he felt in this very moment.

the moment was interrupted by burdock, as always - "are ya'll comin' or what?" haymitch quickly let go of her waist. "you okay?" he asked softly. she just nodded and straightened her dress. haymitch exhaled, trying to slow his racing heart. "yeah, yeah, we're comin’," he replied, catching up with burdock as y/n followed beside him.

"so, what you gonna do with a bird once you kill one, burdock?" y/n asked. burdock just looked over at her and shrugged. "dunno. maybe sell it in the hob or somethin’," he said before abruptly stopping, causing haymitch and y/n to halt as well.

burdock looked around dramatically. "wonder if that's a bird… or a squirrel," he whispered, before his eyes landed on a small doe standing beside the river. his eyes lit up like a starry night. he quietly shushed haymitch and y/n, moving a little closer. squinting his right eye to get the perfect aim, he grabbed an arrow from the sling on his back, placed it on his bow, and started to pull it back. he whispered under his breath, words like "okay, okay… steady…" when he released the arrow - and missed. the deer bolted across the river.

burdock looked over at haymitch and y/n, whispering, "i’m gonna go find it! stay here." before they could protest, he was already off, chasing after the deer - always chasing after something, whether it was a girl, or an animal of some sort.

y/n just snickered and crossed her arms, smiling. "he ain't ever gonna catch that deer." haymitch looked over at her and smiled too. "i know. he does like to try though, doesn't he?" they both laughed together, and haymitch was glad burdock was so optimistic about his hunting skills.

the birds were chirping once more, and it felt peaceful just standing there with her. they were only a few inches apart. y/n looked over at haymitch and motioned toward a big rock by the river. "wanna go sit?" haymitch felt his heart skip as he smiled softly. "as long as you don't push me in," he joked, and she rolled her eyes as they walked toward the rock.

y/n fixed her dress as she sat on the rock and smiled, looking around her. if haymitch could replay one vision or moment in his head for the rest of his life, it would be this - the way she was so effortlessly perfect. her lips were slightly pouted as she picked up a small rock from the ground. if haymitch ever woke up with amnesia, and could only remember one person, he'd want to remember y/n everdeen, as cheesy as it sounded.

it was a little awkward at first, and haymitch wanted to start some sort of conversation with her. but, as always, he typically sounded like a fool around her. "so… burdock told me you have a boyfriend now?" haymitch immediately regretted saying it. seriously? that's the first thing you say to her? he scolded himself in his mind.

she looked over at him, slightly taken off guard. "uh, sorta. it's not serious, or anything. i haven't even seen him since summer started." she picked at her nails as haymitch hummed in acknowledgment, trying to hide the immediate disgust he felt in his heart. y/n - his y/n - dating a boy who wasn't him. probably had already kissed him, too. haymitch wanted to puke.

"what's his name?" haymitch asked, not really wanting to know, but curiosity - and maybe jealousy, too - got the best of him. she picked up another rock, sending it skipping across the river, the water rippling as it went.

"miles," she replied.

haymitch cringed. as in… miles buckley? that kid? seriously? haymitch thought. miles buckley had unruly red hair and freckles. sure, miles seemed like he’d be nice - haymitch had never talked to him before - but just the mere thought of him holding his girl’s hand… or, worse, her heart… made haymitch want to crawl into a cave and never be seen again. he knew he didn’t technically have the right to call her his, but he wanted to so badly - and that dream felt like sand slipping through his fingers.

"that’s nice," haymitch said, trying - and probably failing - to sound indifferent. in that moment, he almost wished burdock would come back, just so he wouldn’t have to keep this conversation going, even though he’d started it himself.

y/n looked over at him and tilted her head slightly. "you’re taller this summer," she said with a soft smile.

and… haymitch took that thought back. burdock could stay chasing a deer in the district 12 forrest forever, for all he cared. she noticed him. really noticed him.

haymitch laughed quietly as he felt his face burn again. "i–uh, i guess i did," he replied.

"finally, taller than me. never thought i’d see the day," she said with that playful look in her eyes as she bumped his shoulder. haymitch had always wondered what the electric fence might feel like - and he decided it probably felt exactly like that.

he bumped her back, smiling. "i knew i’d see the day. my pa was tall, so it was bound to happen." he said, a small smirk tugging at his lips.

y/n laughed - really laughed - and haymitch felt like he’d won a medal. he made her laugh.

"i’m taller than maysilee still. i think she’ll always stay pretty short."

haymitch sighed at the name. y/n was best friends with maysilee donner, for whatever reason. haymitch had started having a problem with her when he was eight and got chiggers, and she gave him the stupid nickname “itchy itchy haymitchy” that everyone decided to use. he told people he wasn’t contagious, but they didn’t care. they still stayed away still - and that was when he realized kids could be cruel.

his only real friend had been burdock. and, by default, y/n too.

still, y/n had decided to become best friends with maysilee last year. haymitch wasn’t mad at her for it, not really - but he never understood how someone like y/n could be friends with someone as cruel as maysilee donner.

before he could rethink his words, haymitch said, "why’re you even friends with her anyway? you’re so… different from her."

he tried to keep the bitterness out of his voice, but he was pretty sure he didn’t succeed.

y/n’s smile faltered as she looked over at him. she knew why haymitch didn’t like maysilee - he had every right not to - but to her, maysilee wasn’t that bad once you got to know her. she could be funny, witty, and she even had an old tin of lipstick she’d let y/n wear once.

"she ain’t that bad once you get to know her," she said, picking at her nails again.

haymitch let out a bitter laugh. "you wouldn’t think so once you’ve been called ‘itchy itchy haymitchy’ for a week as a kid."

then she felt bad. really, really bad. he was still hurt from that - and she wished she’d never brought up maysilee in the first place.

after a moment, she thought of something. maybe she could change his perspective a little.

"have you ever been given another nickname?" she asked softly. "not like that, just… a nice one?"

haymitch furrowed his eyebrows as he thought. "no, not really." he said it with a small smile.

"well, that ain’t fair. everyone needs a nickname."

haymitch snickered, looking back out at the river. "i don’t need a nickname. i got my name, and that’s all i need."

y/n smiled. "mitch."

he blinked. "what?"

"that’ll be your new nickname." she tilted her head, looking way too proud of herself.

haymitch grimaced. it sounded a little too close to itchy itchy haymitchy for his liking. but the way she looked at him - soft, hopeful - made it difficult to hate.

"absolutely not." he laughed.

she laughed too - that easy, effortless laugh that always made his chest feel lighter. "nope. that’s your name now."

haymitch shook his head, pretending to protest, even as he accepted the defeat. or the win.

before he could say anything else, they both heard the crunch of leaves. burdock came into view, his hair a mess, his crossbow hanging loosely in his hand, a scowl on his face.

"i didn’t find the deer," he muttered.

haymitch looked at y/n. she looked at him. then they both looked at burdock - and burst out laughing.

burdock immediately started complaining about them laughing at him, about how he’d "just walked an hour through these darn woods for nothin’."

it might’ve been a waste of time for burdock, but to haymitch, he wouldn’t have taken it back for anything. even though half an hour ago he wished he were anywhere else - especially after asking about y/n’s new boyfriend - he’d made her laugh.

and for now, that was enough for haymitch.

VINE & FIRE

haymitch abernathy x f!everdeen reader

summary: haymitch loved her since he was ten, burdock’s little sister with stubborn eyes and a laugh he could never forget, a secret he kept close even as the world grew crueler. one stolen summer, under the oak tree and in the quiet meadow, they shared a fling that burned too bright and ended too soon - before the reaping, before his home burned and his family was gone, before he pushed her away to keep her safe from a world that would punish love. now she has been chosen for the 51st hunger games, and he is forced to mentor the girl he once loved, haunted by stolen kisses, broken promises, and everything they were never allowed to be. childhood friends, first love, and a vow that neither time nor tragedy can erase.

authors note: y'all don't even know how excited i am to write this series. this was originally gonna be a one shot, but i decided this needs to be a series lol so pls tell me what y'all think! also, i have made a playlist for this series, so give it a listen if you're interested!

playlist:

warnings: none for this chapter i believe, small implications of a physical discription for reader, not proofred.

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CHAPTER ONE - BURDOCK'S KID SISTER ❤︎

crunch. crunch. crunch.

haymitch’s footsteps crunched along the dusty path, a stick clutched in his hand - the perfect sword for a hero - on his way to his best friend, burdock everdeen’s house.

summer had finally come to district 12. the sun was warm on his face, and his skin was already getting a little darker - though haymitch knew he still burned easily. he had just turned ten, and the world felt exciting and full of possibilities. ma said he was a big boy now, which apparently came with responsibilities - like keeping an eye on his little brother sid, helping ma whenever he could, and maybe, just maybe, not getting into too much trouble along the way, though he doubts that.

haymitch’s hair had grown out over the winter, his blonde ringlets brushing almost to the bottom of his ears. ma always said he looked like a little sheep with that unruly mop of curls - haymitch didn’t mind it much, though.

the walk to burdock's house felt like a lifetime to haymitch, even though it was only 10 minutes - thanks to the summer heat that always seemed to bake district 12. finally, he spotted the familiar dandelions surrounding the small goat pen that marked the path to his best friend’s house.

haymitch’s own house was a little bigger than burdock’s, but he didn’t think that made him better - or worse - than his friend. he wasn’t like the donners, anyway. especially maysilee donner, stuck-up and mean. haymitch didn’t like her much - burdock thought she was pretty. haymitch thought she was pretty, sure… but nothing compared to-

and then there she was.

y/n everdeen, standing outside the everdeen home, carefully feeding their stray black dog, tweet. haymitch never knew why she’d named the dog tweet, but he never questioned it. she was too pretty to question, in his logic anyway.

her hair fell perfectly over her shoulders, catching the sunlight in little streaks, she was barefoot as was wearing a light blue floral dress. her small hand held out the tiny bits of bird meat for the mutt. haymitch could’ve sworn his little heart either sped up or - maybe - slowed at the sight of her.

he didn’t really remember when he’d started seeing his best friend’s little sister as more than just burdock’s kid sister - maybe it was the day she tried to patch up one of her goat’s broken legs, her tiny fingers trembling but determined, or the day she picked a yellow primrose from the meadow and pressed it into his hand with a shy smile. it didn’t mean anything, of course, but that didn’t matter. all haymitch remembered was the way her eyes lit up when she laughed, the little freckle on her nose he’d always noticed, and the gentle kindness in her eyes that made his world feel like it had stopped for just a moment.

haymitch imagined catching her giggle again if she tripped over a stick or if tweet barked at a passing butterfly. he wanted to tease her, make her smile, maybe even race her to the oak tree - but for now, he just stood there, watching - that was until haymitch’s racing thoughts were interrupted by burdock bursting out the door.

“haymitch!” burdock exclaimed, thumping him on the shoulder. “are we still going to the meadow? collier told me he saw the fattest squirrel ever yesterday! we oughta find him!”

collier was one of haymitch’s other best friends, though haymitch didn’t see him very often. collier was always busy helping his pa in the hob, so the only time they really crossed paths was at school.

that was when y/n looked up from feeding tweet and started to follow burdock, like she always did. she was his little shadow - haymitch never minded, of course, but burdock was a different story. to him, y/n was annoying, and he always wanted her to stay home whenever she tried to tag along. in his eyes, she was his baby sister, even though she was only a year younger than both him and haymitch.

y/n wiped her hands on her dress and flashed her signature small smile - the one that made haymitch’s heart do somersaults. “can i come too?”

burdock groaned and picked up a stick from the ground, waving it in her face. “no, y/n! why don’t you go play with your own friends?”

her smile faltered, and she intertwined her fingers, kicking a small rock. “i don’t have many friends, burdock… please?” she said softly.

haymitch immediately felt bad. y/n was never bad company in his eyes. maybe he was biased - he did have some sort of feelings for her - but he also thought his best friend could be unnecessarily mean sometimes.

burdock opened his mouth to protest, but before he could, their ma poked her head out of the front door, wearing that “don’t even think about it” look. “burdock, let your sister go with you, or you won’t leave this house,” she said, stern and commanding.

burdock straightened his shoulders immediately. “yes, ma’am,” he said, his voice stiff but telling haymitch he still wanted to argue - he just didn’t want ma reporting him to pa when he got home from the mines.

y/n just smiled and called out, “wait for me! i’m gonna go grab my shoes!” before darting back into the house, her hair falling behind her like it had a mind of its own.

burdock grumbled, shooting haymitch a sideways glance. “she’s so annoying,” he muttered under his breath, probably hoping ma didn’t hear him.

haymitch just shrugged and smiles, “she just wants to be included. i don’t see much of an issue,” he said.

burdock rolled his eyes and kicked the same little rock y/n had sent skittering across the ground. “you like er' better than me sometimes,” he said, a half-smile tugging at the corner of his lips despite his scowl.

haymitch laughed quietly. he always had to keep in mind just how much he could defend y/n without crossing the very important, invisible line - not because he didn’t want to, he always wanted to, but there were rules:

he didn’t want to look like a fool in front of his best friend, and

he had to remember what burdock had told him the summer before: my baby sister is forever off-limits.

haymitch could still hear burdock’s words echoing in his ten-year-old mind, the stern tone of a brother who cared in his own way. “don’t let anything happen with her, or it’ll be weird and gross,” burdock had said with a disgusted look on his face - like even the thought made him grossed out. haymitch had taken that very seriously, even now.

he watched the door for y/n, thinking about the way her little hands fumbled with her shoes, how she always got a bit distracted by the sunlight sparkling off the dandelions, or how she carefully tried not to spill the crumbs she’d saved for tweet. every small thing about her made haymitch’s chest feel warm, and he had to resist the urge to rush over and help her instead of pretending to be casual.

even the way she ran toward them a moment later, sliding on her worn sneakers and laughing when she stumbled just slightly, made him grin. “last one there's a rotten egg!” she called, and haymitch felt a little flutter in his stomach that he didn’t quite understand.

burdock and haymitch hurried after her down the narrow path leading to the meadow.

“y/n! don’t run so fast! you’ll fall, and then i’ll get in trouble!” burdock yelled, rolling his eyes yet again as he tried to keep up.

she only laughed, her feet carrying her easily over the uneven forest ground that wrapped around the everdeen home - and most of district 12. she moved like she belonged there, ducking past low branches and hopping over roots without a second thought. she looked completely in her element - so free, so light, so happy.

haymitch watched her with quiet awe. he didn’t quite understand the word beautiful yet, didn’t know how it felt or what it was supposed to mean - but if he ever did learn it, he was sure it would look exactly like y/n everdeen. sunlight filtered through the trees as she ran ahead of them, smiling like the world had never known anything bad at all.

burdock looked over at haymitch’s lovestruck, puppy-eyed expression and furrowed his brows. “what’re you doing?” he asked, his voice dropping slightly.

haymitch’s eyes snapped away from y/n as he looked back at his best friend, shrugging a little too quickly. “nothing. so- did collier find anythin’ else yesterday?” he asked, trying to sound casual, like he always did on days like this.

burdock frowned. “nah. just the fat squirrel. and i wanna find him,” he said, already sounding like the squirrel had no chance of escaping them.

haymitch nodded along, pretending like finding a stupid squirrel was the most important thing in the world, even though his eyes kept drifting back to y/n running ahead, her laughter carrying through the trees.

her laughter was soon replaced by a small gasp and an abrupt stop when they finally reached the meadow, almost sending y/n tumbling over her own shoes.

“burdock! look, look! an apple! can you get it for me?” she pointed up at an apple tree hanging above her. the leaves were a bright summer green, and one almost fake-looking apple dangled just out of reach.

burdock was about to respond when he heard a rustle in the bushes ahead of her. a squirrel darted out from behind the leaves.

burdock’s eyes widened as he raised his stick again and looked over at haymitch with a grin. “that’s the squirrel, i betcha! i’m gonna go catch him!”

before haymitch could even reply, burdock was already running after it, the squirrel now sprinting for its life.

haymitch turned to y/n, who was still standing under the apple tree. he smiled softly at her, not really knowing what to say. hi felt too simple, and they hadn’t really talked much before. the only real “conversation” they’d ever had was when she gave him those yellow primroses a few weeks ago.

y/n looked up at the apple again, then back at haymitch. “would you help me?” she asked.

haymitch felt his face warm immediately, but nonetheless he nodded and walked over. burdock was taller than him, and haymitch wasn’t much taller than y/n - which burdock always teased him about, not in a cruel way, just in a best-friend way.

he stared up at the apple like it was suddenly the most important mission of his life. she looked at him like she believed in him, which was silly - she just wanted the apple - but it still made his heart feel funny.

haymitch thought for a moment, then bent down. “here… get on my shoulders.” his voice wavered a little, probably because of nerves.

she climbed up, light as a feather, though haymitch felt his legs wobble anyway. not because he wasn’t strong - he was ten now, practically a pre-teen, just like ma said. he blamed it on nerves again.

her hair brushed against his forehead as she balanced herself, and it smelled like something woodsy mixed with flowers. she reached up and plucked the apple from the branch.

haymitch looked up just in time to see her smile, sunlight filtering through the leaves and making her look almost unreal.

“i got it!” she squealed, holding the apple in front of his face.

haymitch laughed softly. “bet you could make some kinda pie with that.”

he helped her down carefully, making sure she didn’t fall into the dirt. she tucked the apple into the small pocket of her dress and smiled at him.

“thank you, haymitch.”

up close, he could see the tiny freckles scattered across her cheeks. haymitch didn’t know much about love - only the kind he felt for his ma and his brother - but standing there with y/n everdeen, he found himself wishing they were older. maybe then, he could marry her.

haymitch abernathy didn’t even know what that really meant yet - he just knew he wanted to stay right there, under that apple tree, forever.