poasting

no one really talks about the amount of EMS workers who just straight up eat the car crash victims :\

It probably feels good as fuck to lose your job and then lie to your wife about where you’re going every day and just ride the bus in a suit for hours and hours and hours

I see a mouse and eat it. I clench my fist and beat it

id trade it all for 1 mcgiggle sandwhich

Loitering around the gas station holding a jerry can not filling it up but just sowing a little uncertainty in my neighborhood

you do start to understand why jfk killed himself...

getting my brake lines fixed every time my wife cuts them is expensive but i dont mind atall. i love her

if shes your girl then why am I in her uncles dms lowballing his ebay listings

dude bensons gonna roast our suckling pig

doing insane shibari on my fairy wife with shit I bought at the craft store and telling everyone she's a keychain