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@brokepizzas
Just like usernames on the internet, everybody in this world must have a totally unique name that nobody else has. When a person dies, that name becomes available. John fears for his life’s safety.
No, Chad and Karen fear for their lives safety-
Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
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Where do I get the live version of these figurines? This is serious guys-
idk why the fact about ixion (graphically) getting a cloud pregnant, randomly popped up in the middle of my seemingly happy and innocent dream. But what's more important is- how did he get a cloud pregnant (this is some american horror story shi-)?
Well… lets´s do it
Meanwhile Britain: Um, ladies... Don't tell me y'all forgot about me-*winks* *double winks* *clings teacups with herself*
A genie who twists the words of wishes to distort the original meaning, but what he twists them to is actually better than what the wisher intended.
Me: I want lamb sauce
Genie (technically is autocorrect 2.0): You mean "I want Gordon Ramsey"?
Me: Yes.
Anya is live and ready to show you everything. Watch her strip, dance, and perform exclusive shows just for you. Interact in real-time and make your fantasies come true.
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At first, the Mandela Effect changed minor things: Berenstain instead of Berenstein, Curious George having a tail, etc. But lately it’s been getting stronger. Like, since when was the Eiffel Tower in Germany? I could’ve sworn we had one moon, not two? And was the sky always pink?
Narrator: Little did those puny, maniacal earthlings know that they were trapped in a stimulation- but lets call it a game. They had entered the last level. Some will go crazy. Some will die. The dinosaurs didn't survive the last level. Will the humans be the first ones to beat the system?
The answer is - No.
We had hope for the dinosaurs. Rest in peace.
But the humans? They're all going to die.
Anyways- chop chop. Let's get back to work. Oh hey! You with the pizza hat? Why are you wearing a pizza hat? Are you pro-humans or something?
Guy with the pineapple pizza hat: Um-
Narrator: Nevermind. Did you set off the bomb on planet number 21748?
Guy with the pineapple pizza hat: Wow. You're literally Thanos...
Narrator: Are you high? Who names their kid Thanos? They must really, really despise him. Or is he a her?
Guy with the pineapple pizza hat: You... don't know who that is?
Narrator: No. NOW PUT THOSE USELESS TENTACLES OF YOURS TO WORK-
Guy with the pineapple pizza hat and two tentacles for legs: Bruh... It's an Earth thing.
Narrator: Well say goodbye to your friend Thanos cause he is about to die in the worst way possi-
Guy with the pineapple pizza hat and two tentacles for legs: He's dead.
Narrator: Oh great. My condolences. He seemed like a nice guy. NOW EXTERMINATE THOSE THINGS ON PLANET 21748! I can't even have a good night's sleep without dreaming about those creatures crawling across my face. Oh- and their legs.
Guy with the pineapple pizza hat and two tentacles for legs: That planet filled with those cockroaches crawling on the walls with those human legs? Oh we tried. But they survived, bruh...
Narrator: WHAT! WHAT DO YOU MEAN THEY SURVIVED?!
Guy with the pineapple pizza hat and two tentacles for legs: Well, fortunately or unfortunately, they found out about them being a stimulation and...
Narrator: Are you stopping for a theatrical effect?
Guy with the pineapple pizza hat and two tentacles for legs: I'm not quite sure if we are in a stimulation right now, bruh...
Narrator: WHAT? N- Are you tell me that right now, they're reverse engineering our system right now?
Guy with the pineapple hat and two tentacles for legs: You're 99.3834% right. I'm also 99.949% sure that we are already in a stimulation.
Narrator: And. how are you 99.949% sure we are in a stimulation?
Guy with the pineapple hat and two tentacles: I have tentacles for legs - which I think is really cool upgrade and I'm wearing a pineapple pizza hat. Oh and you have fins for hands, if you didn't notice. Man... If I were you, I'd just dig a hole and hide away from the rest of the universe. Oh wait- sorry for the insensitive comment. I forgot you have fins for hands.
Narrator- Wow. Level one?
Guy with the pineapple hat and two tentacles for legs which he totally adores: Yeah... But let's stay optimistic! Who doesn't love games?!
Narrator: Where's the nearest cliff where I can serve myself to some sharks...
Guy with the pineapple hat and two tentacles for legs which he totally adores: I can drive you there! Always happy to help! Might earn me a few karma points.
Narrator: Nice.
idk man I've never been in love but - every time i listen to a song sung by a broken heart , my entire body just shifts into this other fragile, naive me who might have experienced some tragic betrayal in another life or watched her loved one get married off to someone else, while she stood on the sidelines, cheering the newly married couple, wishing them well... it's like i cant relate but at the same time some age old part of me mourns for her lost love from another reality. yeeeee I've been listening to too many heartbreak songs! welppppp!!!!!
I felt her long cold fingers rest on my shoulder.
"NO. STOP! Don't touch me, YOU MONSTER!" i shoved her hand off of me , as I tried my best to back away from her until i felt the cold wall against my back. She stumbled back onto her feet, adjusting her expensive looking dress that flowed elegantly against her tall , slim frame. The air around me started to freeze as her long legs covered the distance between us.
"MONSTER?! NOW I AM THE MONSTER?!"Her nails dug deep into her hands, drawing blood. She crouched next to me, stabbing me with her void, glacial stare.
"Look at you." A small smirk started taking form on her thin lips.
"All these people lying over here ,lifeless, like a few human sized puppets. People who once believed in you , now dead because of you. And now, look at you, sweating their blood. YOU. Not me. And now i am the monster?!We both know who the real monster has always been. The fame and lustful women around you have scr3wed out your eyes and your non-existing brain. BUT, the audacity. Men. Such simple naive hypocritical creatures.” She scoffed in a manner I was not familiar with- disappointment.
“You know what, you're better off alone. Now go! Hide in some cave. Create your own secret torture chamber. Befriend a bunch of rats who can ride a broom and eat humans for lunch. Cause that's what villains do right? There's more to being a villain in this era, Alakay."
Blood rushed down my body, when my name fell off of her lips. My name. Not a soul knew my real name. She stepped back, navigating her way through the lifeless bodies, towards the window. The room filled with the sound of her heels , slowly clicking against the cold blood-stained marble tile. My head felt like it was about to roll off of my neck any second. The clicking stopped causing my eyes to meet her icy orbs, once again.
"Kid. Take my advice. Don't follow the 'cause that's what heroes do' policy and surrender yourself to the police. It gets better with time. The next time you do it, you'll be giving yourself a pat on your back." Her eyes glimmered with something familiar. Something that felt real. Something that made me feel home.
p.s. - i wrote this in a hurry- i know the amount off mistakes on this post might be enough for all the literature professors 'round the world to join hands and plot a plan for the extermination of the cockroach that typed out this post .
