Broken, like me.

This one is funny. I have been told this at times. "Dart: you're too much. Too much drama. Too much selfishness, and that's not good enough. So, make up your mind: Am I too much or not enough?

I think love is something you have to learn. If you didn't learn it as a child, you hve to be lucky and get the right partner who sees the version of you that you yourself don't see. For me, I'm trying to learn how to be the parent I didn 't have. Even without kids of my own, I'm trying to be the type of person I needed when I was a kid.

I wish I had some desire. Any desire.

What is happy?

Always choose yourself, then choose who chooses you.

The problem with chooseing who chooses you, is that you need more than one person to choose you to have a choice in chosing the chooser. Alas I've have never had that state in my life where I had one chooser who chose me, and who I wanted to choose back. So I'm still waiting to choose the right chooser.

You can’t skip the messy part. The messy part is where you grow.

But does the messy part ever end though?

Not really. Life is messy. You get better at dealing with mess. You accept mess is going to be in your life.

Please teach me how to love myself at all.

The problem with being low support needs is that people mentally autocorrect that to “no support needs” and then proceed to give you absolutely nothing and then get surprised when you implode after six months.

Or worse: ==> "No apparent support needs." ==> "No requests for support" ==> They believe you when you say, "I'm fine" ==> They take you at your word, "I don't want to be a burden" How do you say, "I need to be wanted" in a way that will never get you an pretend answer?

Doesn't happen. If it did, I'd wonder what they wanted. I know this is paranoia. Us paranoids still have enemies.

Only if you know how to love. What is love?

You glow when you are confident? Really? Who knew?