everything was blue

Sounds good. Keep me informed, I suppose. I’d be happy to stop by when it does open.

My brother has a cat, but I don’t think he’d appreciate it much if I offered it to you guys.. He seems pretty attached to it.

Trust me, you’ll know. I’m working on getting ads out.

I don’t want someone’s pet cat... that’d be too sad. I can’t think about giving up Lord Tubbington Jr. or Charity the Fourth........ or new kitten that has yet to be named that I liked too much to put towards the bar.

Drown me in pizza and chinese food and I’d die a happy death.

Eh, maybe. I might stop by sometime. I’m a, I don’t know, pancorn? Sounds like a mix between pancake and acorn, so I kinda love it.

ME. TOO. and like a lot of Dr. Pepper and a box of Lucky Charms for a snack followed by 4983598345 hours of Just Dance to keep my abs.

Blessing in disguise probably because baking is evil sometimes.

But nah, I don’t think I’d actually be wanted, and I don’t wanna make people uncomfy. Bicorn?

Baking is hard. Cooking is hard, actually. Take-out is all that’s good in the world.

BRITTANY: Get ready to fall in love with me.

BRITTANY: Which super unfortunately isn't going to be returned because I'm way too busy to love.

BRITTANY: As you may or may not know, my sister Jamie Lynn and I are getting ready to open the already notorious Pussy Purrsuasian, world's first, lesbian cat bar.

BRITTANY: All cats are adoptable.

BRITTANY: I did some snooping, which is how I got your number, and I've seen some of your art.

That isn’t– …

Mm. Well, that’s good to know. Is this place already up and running? I’m interested to see what it’s like, in spite of my common sense.

Not yet, supplier issues at the moment, but #soon. I’m working on recruiting some local talent for advertising and decorating. Stay tuned, BSP and JLP have this under control. Mostly.

He follows his own set of rules, I think you could say.

A lesbian cat bar? So.. does that mean I wouldn’t be invited?

Men are allowed, I’m not racist. 

What can I say? I’m a real ass-kisser with a weakness for pretty faces.

Luckily for you I have a pretty face and a great ass.

That’s definitely one thing I try not to think about too often when it comes to my brother. I like to think he was smart and used protection, but…it’s Noah.

Hey, I think you’re providing a very useful service here. Us lady lovers deserve a place to hang out at, too, seeing as Scandals is already a shitty bar and really only hosts gay men. It’s a pretty tight system, then.

I try not to think at all.

Right, and I’m sure that had nothing to do with your face or rockin’ bod.

You’re going to be awesome for business. You’re also already my favorite and not just because you’re so hot.

I learned where babies came from pretty early on. I mean, my brother’s Noah Puckerman, so he sure wasn’t keeping any secrets from me on male-female relationships. That kinda sucks that you had to do something you didn’t want to, though. You shouldn’t have to. But the advantage of the math genius stuff is not having to pay an accountant. I’d volunteer to help with some of that stuff since I am actually pretty bitching at math, but I obviously can’t compare to an actual genius.

That makes sense, Puck probably ended up getting a lot of babies delivered to people by now. It wasn’t that bad, being useful was nice for a while. At least if I do it I know people can’t take money from Jamie, Lord T, or I. We’re the profit sharerers.

I believe you need to be at least 35 in order to be president.

I’m sorry you’ve been yelled at. What club are you talking about?

America barely follows rules anymore, look who our president is right now.

Me too. Except when it comes to politics. There’s been a lot of passing on that lately in my life.

You certainly have your work cut out for you, in that case. I’m pretty sure I saw someone listening to an actual Walkman outside of Starbucks this morning.

Brittany S. Pierce for president 2020, just wait.

That was one I actually didn’t really watch. Okay, I’ll trust you on that for now. I followed the medicine path anyways, not the theoretical physics/math thing, so I’m not an expert at all. I’d love to see your calculations on that, honestly.

You missed out, it even taught me all about where babies come from. I didn’t even want to do math, but I guess when you’re a super genius you owe it to the world to share it. I keep all my books color organized!! You can see them when the bar opens, I’m being my own accountant too.

True. Thank you for reminding me. I’m extra glad I bought the Britta filter now.

Is that so? Well, there’s certainly plenty of positive things to be said for self-confidence. What did you say your name was?

No problem, I’m all about staying in the know.

Mhm. Brittany S. Pierce. I haven’t been back to Ohio in ages, but, you know, someone has to try and update this town into 2017.

Something you do a lot?

That sounds rad as hell. I’m sure I’d go if I had ladyparts.

I like to try and bake... but my sister grounded me from the oven for a bit.

You’re not very funny then if that was a joke. And I know I am thanks. 

I have an inability to see/hear negativity so this chat is gonna have to stop.