baxter

it kills me everyday that there's not a single person that actually knows me and all i hear is kind words. i know i'm not that, i know i'm not good. nobody seems to want to admit that i'm a disappointment that nobody really wants around and that doesn't give me the strength to change, only the weakness to rot forever.

every word i say doesn't have a single effect on anybody, it's just white noise. and yet they still cut me like a knife, even if i try to hurt anybody the only one that'll come out hurt is me. the fact i'm so miserable and terrible at everything i do is a sign that maybe i'm one of those people whose destiny is to be an interrupted life. maybe i am the worst person alive and there's nothing left in my future, i'll just have to sit and wait to die — and i probably won't have to wait that long, i guess i'm just a lost cause that the universe is already over with.